So I got called a “fatty” by someone on Instagram today.
And now, before I go any further, this is not some lame attempt to fish for complements or whatever. It was a bogus remark by a troll on the internet. I deleted it. But not before I went to the guy’s page, andddd it was all shirtless bathroom mirror selfies with his face scribbled out. So there’s that…
I wasn’t really hurt. I was just sorta miffed. Frankly, I was disappointed in humanity that people would seriously be so cruel. Calling a former “anorexic” fat? Who does that?
And I was going to just Shake it Off, a la, Taylor Swift, but I actually thought it was a great opportunity for reflection. That, and when the comment came in, I was writing another piece on what recovery has taught me, so I decided to practice what I was literally preaching. I needed to #AllowMyselfToFeel
Because back in the early stages of my recovery, a comment like this would have derailed me. Sent me into a tail spin. Gone all Britney Spears, circa 2007.
But not this time.
Sure, maybe I was a little stung by it. I mean, come on…no person wants to hear that they’re a “fatty,” but I rationally knew that, no…that’s not true. I’m not remotely close to being overweight.
But I felt my mind going to a place I didn’t want it to go. A place where I was concerned with how I look and my body image and being harshly critical of myself. A place that, though I am strong in my recovery, is still my one area of vulnerability to ED and his dirty tricks.
I needed to reground myself. So I turned to the Word.
And opened up to today’s readings. And wouldn’t you know…it was exactly what I needed to hear.
Ephesians 6: 10-20. AKA, putting on the armor of God.
“In all circumstances, hold faith as a shield, to quench all the flaming arrows of the Evil One.” (aka ED)
When I read that this was today’s reading, I literally laughed out loud at just how amazing God is and how He gives us just what we need, when exactly we need it.
I mean, come on, God. You’ve outdone yourself here 🙂
But it’s true. Everyday, whether it is in the form of a cruel comment from a cowardly troll on the internet, or a flat tire at an inopportune time, or a detour in our life plan we hadn’t anticipated…there are flaming arrows literally hurling towards us. All the time.
These things make us take our eyes off of the Truth, or worse…doubt in God’s goodness or perhaps even existence. It is a battle out there.
One that I am grateful I don’t have to face alone.
I was reminded tonight of the importance of “suiting up.”
I don’t have to tell you the climate of our culture and our political system right now. After this election, we’re all going to have to truly put on the Armor of God and stand firm in our faith and trust that God’s goodness will prevail, even if it is not reflected in the fabric of the society around us.
This comment tonight, it was a little gnat. A pesky fly that, perhaps was the canary in the the mineshaft of things to come. A little preparatory nudge from God that I can’t be lackadaisical in my faith. In my readiness. In trusting in the Truth.
This isn’t some Braveheart battle cry, I promise. War paint and kilts don’t do nothin for this figure 😉
God can use everything for good. Even hurtful Instagram comments. He can use anything as an opportunity for growth. For teaching. For communicating His love. We just have to seek His word. Show Him where it hurts so that He can heal and help us grow.
Because I promise, He’ll answer loud and clear. We’ve just gotta seek to listen.
@beauty.beyond.bones – Instagram
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