There’s a perspective that you gain with time.
There are things that you see when you’re out of the thick of the moment.
Kind of like when the news cuts to a helicopter-view of a traffic jam. From the viewpoint of a car in the snarl, all you can see are exhaust pipes and the highway median. But from above, you can see the magnitude of the back up, the cause of the jam, and when and where it opens up.
This Christmas marks the one year anniversary of my mom’s stroke. And I’ve spent a lot of time reflecting on that monumental milestone as of late. Because seeing how my mom fought tooth and nail for her recovery, and is now the thriving, radiant woman we all know and love, I’ve spent a lot of time in gratitude and also reverence for His grace and healing — in all of us.
And looking back at this past year, I’m definitely exiting 2017 as a different young woman than the one that entered 2017.
To catch anyone up who may have just stumbled in, this past year, I moved home to Ohio from NYC for eight months to help my mom recover. Just recently — in about September — I have been going back and forth from NYC to Ohio for various acting jobs and basically living my life in two places.
But anywho, although incredibly challenging, it has also been the most inspiring season of my life. And I’ve taken away some lessons I will hold dear forever.
Aside from the obvious of Trusting God and Cherishing Time, I’ve witnessed something far more nuanced and delicate.
There is beauty in humility.
Sometimes, I’ll sit down to write, and I’ll just get this overwhelming nudge to write something, and today was one of those days.
I’ve really been struck this year about the humility of the first Christmas. Given the recent miracle of my period, I’ve spent time thinking about what it must have actually been like for Mary to give birth in a barn.
Really. The hay. The animals. The smell of dung and musty stables.
Jesus – Savior of the World – was born in the epitome of a humble circumstance.
Not to mention, becoming human.
But as we’re approaching that milestone day, I’ve come to realize something quite remarkable.
I’ve come to realize that her beauty is much more than just her courage or perseverance.
It’s the same attribute that makes the birth of Christ so beautiful and deeply moving.
My mom has always been a community leader. She’s the planner. The communicator. The organizer. The people-connector. She’s one of those women who is literally everyone’s best friend. It’s her gift. If you’re familiar with the Spiritual Gift Inventory, she’s a “woo-er.”
For her entire life, she has always been the helper: organizing the meal deliveries for new moms or sick friends. She’s the one organizing the events and never asking for help, but going above and beyond.
Basically the female version of George Bailey.
It has been such a incredible show of grace and class and humility to see my mother accept help. To see her be open to receive what people want to give. I’m sure it hasn’t been easy, but her doing so, it takes my breath away with love & respect.
My entire life, I feel like God has been smacking me over the head, trying to beat down the ugly pride in my life that pops up like a Whack-a-Mole. The anorexia – (including losing my hair!) was to break down my pride in the physical department. The whole sorority presidency debacle where I not only got stripped down to my undies in front of the Chapter, but also stripped of my position, was to break down my pride in the social department. And I don’t know, I just feel like, God keeps trying to get through to me, and I keep failing to pull it out from the roots, always having pride seep into some different area of my life.
So it has been such a magnificent lesson to witness her beauty in humility.
I spent a long time last week, standing in front of the manger scene at St. Patrick’s cathedral. If you’ve never been, it is definitely worth the effort.
But standing there, literally among a life size display of our Lord’s humble entrance into this world, I realized that there is nothing more beautiful in this life.
And now I’m finally understanding just where this overwhelming awe of my mother is coming from.
And leave it to Jesus to set that example before us at Christmas.
I wish you all a joyous and wonderful Christmas. I count you all among my blessings, and I pray that this coming year be filled with love and peace and a strengthening of faith and humility.
And just because I promised to keep you all in the loop…I’m going on a date tomorrow. 🙂
***THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO HAS ORDERED MY BOOKS, BLOOM: A JOURNAL BY BEAUTYBEYONDBONES AND “MY BLOGGING TIPS“***
@beauty.beyond.bones – Instagram
Next time you’re shopping on Amazon, be sure to stop by my link first! Doing so is absolutely FREE for you, and a great way to support this blog! (When you stop by my link first, whatever you get on Amazon will give this blog a little kickback :))
My favorite item someone purchased last week was a Waterproof iPod Shuffle! So if that was you…THANK YOU! 🙂
For Podcast versions of my posts, please check out Patreon! You make this blog possible 🙂