Letting You In On A Secret

There’s a part of my past that I haven’t really shared with you.


I’ve been pretty irresponsibly open about the anorexia in my past, but there’s also another part of my history that was equally defining, perhaps even more so. And that’s Ulcerative Colitis.

If you don’t know what that is, it is the “sister disease” of Crohn’s disease, which is more well known — they just affect different parts of the intestine. Basically, it is an auto-immune disease, meaning the body attacks itself, and it affects your digestive system. And there is no cure.

And the reason that I haven’t really shared much about this is that it is so intertwined with my development of anorexia.

I was diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis when I was sixteen, and subsequently developed anorexia shortly afterwards – in large part because of the pain from eating due to the UC. The UC made me lose weight, as I was unable to absorb nutrients because my intestines were lined in ulcers and I had developed gastroparesis (paralysis of the pyloric valve in the stomach), but it was exacerbated by my fear to gain weight from the anorexia.

They were happening simultaneously.

Which also allowed me to use UC to my anorexia’s advantage.

Top it off with having to take literally the highest dose of the steroid, Prednisone, which made me hyperactive, and you’ve got the recipe for disaster. And fun fact, Prednisone is nicknamed the “dirty drug” because of its negative mental and physical side effects.

The thing about UC is that you go through periods of remission, and periods when you’re in an active flare, which can range from anywhere from 1 month to -as I found out, 10 months. I don’t need to go into detail, but flares are excruciating. My mom always jokes that childbirth will be nothing for me after the pain I’ve had to endure.

So I was actively flaring when I developed anorexia. The steroid did work after about 3 months, and put me into remission, but it left some long lasting effects that I still deal with to this day.

Fast forward five years later to 2012, and I started to flare again. And it was worse.

This time, I went to a different doctor. The highest rated GI doctor in the midwest. He was appalled that my previous doc had put me on Prednisone, given its dangerous side effects for young women in particular. Namely, the mental side effects, and the fact that it significantly increases your risk for osteoporosis. So he will not prescribe it.

That was music to my ears, because after the episode with it in high school, my parents and I vowed that dirty drug would never cross my lips again. #ItNearlyKilledMe

But this second flare, it was out of control. I had to move home from NYC. I was on bed rest for 10 months. Nothing was working. I went to probably 5 different GI doctors within the tristate area, I went to naturopaths, specialists. Took mega drugs, natural medicines, pills, powders, drops, homeopathic remedies, experimental drugs that were still in trials, herbs, supplements, chlorophyll. We even tried faith healing. Nothing worked. My condition kept getting worse and worse.

Hospital Visit for UC ~2012

Given that UC is an auto immune disease, in the most severe cases, the symptoms can become extra-intestinal, meaning that they show up in other areas of the body, outside of the ulcers in my intestines. During this flare, I was experiencing erythema nodosum. Google that shiz. For two months, I was getting nodules the size of oranges and grapefruits on my knees and shins, making me unable to walk. Mine spread to my forearms too. Unsightliness aside, it was also excruciating. The ulcers in my intestines also spread to my mouth, and for several weeks, the sides of my tongue became covered with ulcers, and I was unable to eat. Period. Additionally, given the fact that UC is an inflammatory disease, I would get fevers of 104 degrees, as fevers are the body’s way of fighting inflammation. Nights consisted of cold compresses to break the fever, followed by debilitating, tooth chattering chills.

Things were dire. And my family and I were becoming more and more desperate as the days and weeks went on and on.

The last and final option was to undergo surgery to remove my intestines.

During all this time, I had been researching. Reading different books and looking into different studies on the internet about UC and how people have gotten better and even healed from it.

And the one thing that I had been reading – and also experiencing – was that none of the doctors were talking to me about what I was eating. None of them were talking about my diet.

Which, when I stopped to think about it, was really odd. Ulcerative Colitis is a digestive disease…shouldn’t the food I was eating be the first thing you look at?

I’m not a doctor, but that just made sense to me.

And so I got to researching.

During one of my early visits to the naturopath, he suggested that I go on the Specific Carb Diet, an anti-inflammatory therapeutic way of eating.

He explained it as a very restrictive diet: No grains, gluten, dairy, sugar, soy, beans, legumes, potatoes or corn. But although very rigid, has produced promising results in people with Crohn’s, UC, and autism, surprisingly.

But I am in recovery from anorexia. There’s no way I could adopt a restrictive diet. I do not want to be restricted again. I am free from restriction in my life. I am not going back to that place.

So I put it out of my mind.

That is, until I was facing the last option of getting my intestines removed.

So I tried it.

And you know what? It worked.

It put me out of my flare and into remission. For good.

Ten months after starting that horrible flare, I was back in NYC, living vibrantly and abundantly.

I have my health back. I have my life back. I have my future back.

And it’s thanks to the Specific Carb Diet – SCD.

But let me give credit where credit is due – I know that it was truly God who healed me.

When I told my doctor that I wanted to wait on the surgery and give the SCD a try, he “poo-poo’d” it, saying it would never work. That I was writing my own death wish. He literally said that my healing was a miracle. Something that he’s never seen.

God facilitated my healing through the SCD. And for that, I am forever grateful.

But obviously, it’s hard to talk about food on an anorexia recovery blog, when a person could look at the way I’m eating – following the SCD – and proclaim that I’m not truly in recovery, when I’m still eating a restrictive diet. That I’m a “faker.” That I’m disingenuous. 

Especially given the fact that I used my UC in the past to my anorexia’s advantage.

So up until now, I’ve left it out of my story.

But the fact is, it is a huge part of who I am. And how I live my life. And the roles God and faith and trust have played in my life. And in what I’ve had to overcome.

During that time, I never lost hope. I knew that God was going to heal me. He had gotten me through my anorexia, He would get me through this flare too. He was going to teach me something, make me grow, give me a perspective that I could have only gotten through that suffering.

While I was sick, I began documenting the foods I was eating. The recipes I was making that ultimately healed me of my UC. What started as a blog for my own personal records quickly took off and developed into a pretty highly trafficked blog. I even published a e-cookbook.


But I haven’t talked about it for fear of people doubting my credibility. Doubting the authenticity of my recovery.

So I’m just addressing it head on.

Being home this week, inhabiting the setting where I have so many memories – from the dark days of my anorexia, as well as the dire days of my UC flares, I can’t help but reflect on my journey so far. The journey that hasn’t always been the road I would have chosen. But it’s the road that has gotten me to where I am today. To who I am today.

I don’t know why things happen, or why we have to endure the things that we do, but I do know that we are never in it alone.

I can safely say that I could not have gotten through those periods in my life without God. He held me up. He supported me. Gave me the grace, moment by moment to endure. And ultimately overcome.


So thanks for letting me share that with you tonight.

I know there are no funny cat gifs or flashy Ryan Gosling appearances, but you guys mean a lot to me, and you deserve to know my whole story.

Consider this one step closer to me working up the courage to fully introduce who I really am.

Sending the biggest hugs and love.

←
→

423 responses to “Letting You In On A Secret”

  1. Isn’t it amazing that “fear” can keep us from experiencing real freedom? We have all fallen prey to that ploy of Satan, I suspect. Persevere sweet lady.

    Reply

  2. You are amazing and a blessing to so many with your innocent, transparency – it’s is refreshing and honest….I love it. I share your stuff with women at the street mission where I pastor. God has taken what the enemy surely meant to silence you and is giving you the courage to spread His love and grace to so many that think they aren’t worthy. Bless you! Dan

    Reply

    • Hey Dan! oh my gosh thank you so much 🙂 wow, that is so awesome that you share my stuff with your ministry! i am truly honored. it sounds like you’re doing some powerful work. keep it up. hugs and love xox

      Reply

  4. What a brave post! I think its great you are telling your story. I hope that you arent discredited. Its brilliant that you found a way to eat the foods that allow your UC to go into remission. Im really proud of you for going for it and being so open. 💜

    Reply

    • Thanks Alexis 🙂 I really appreciate your kindness. Yeah, health is something that I’ve definitely learned not to take for granted. Thanks for reading! hugs and love xox

      Reply

  5. Thank you for sharing your story. It takes strength to share some parts of our lives, not knowing what the reaction is going to be. Never be afraid to be who you are. We’re daughters of the King, after all. 🙂

    Have a blessed day.

    Reply

  6. Oh girl! I am so happy for you to share the whole story. The whole story is still likely unraveling for you, as you piece together all that has happened, is happening, and determine where you will go next. God Bless You on your journey to health, healing, and understanding 🙂

    Reply

    • Thank you so much, my friend 🙂 I think you’re right – every day is another day on the journey – for all of us! thanks reading and for your encouragement. hugs and love xoxo

      Reply

  7. I always admire the brave, kind honesty in your writing- sharing this story really does put it all in perspective; you found the deepest key in yourself, and turned it! Wonderful.

    Reply

  8. You’re so brave and so inspiring to share your story. My husband has UC but it’s under control. I wish you well and send you warmest wishes. xo

    Reply

  12. Once again, your witness and testimony lead me to the Holy Spirit. Your wonderful writing style helped me feel the agony of sores on the tongue while trying to deal with the results of medications and anorexia. I felt the hopelessness, but most importantly: I felt the faith.

    God is using you. I say this as a pastor, as a follower of Jesus Christ, and as a human being. Your words and honesty are such a spiritual gift. Thank you for being both vulnerable and strong.

    Blessings,

    Aaron

    Reply

    • Hi Aaron, wow thank you for this. I am touched by your kind words. Amen to that – God is good and has seen me through some pretty dark days, and for that I am so grateful. Sending big hugs xox

      Reply

  15. The brave found battling in the trenches of life. Humanity at its best. Suffering, pain either kills or makes us grow, depending how we react upon it. I think you’re doing exceptionally well.

    Reply

  18. BBB:

    Thank you for sharing more of your story. Those experienced with chronic pain and chronic medical conditions share a common bond.

    I have not experienced these things directly but one of my closest friends was shot while on mission in Uganda and has lived with chronic pain ever since.He, like you, has a uniquely intimate relationship with the Lord.

    In my case, I was driven into a deeper relationship with the Lord by chronic medical conditions in my immediate family–my son went through a kidney transplant, my wife had breast cancer twice, I lost my younger sister to complications to cancer much too young, and so on…I have been personally spared the pain and the conditions, yet experiencing a loss of security in the midst of crises that seemed would never end drove me into the arms of the Lord. So here I am.

    Stephen

    Reply

    • Hi Stephen, thank you for sharing this. You’re right, there is definitely a common bond. oh my gosh, that’s awful, I’m so sorry to hear that. Know that you and your family are in my prayers. Yes, the arms of the Lord are the best place to be. Sending you such a big hug through the computer. xox

      Reply

  19. Thank you so much for your candid portrayal of such an important part of your life. I completely believe what you are saying. My husband is an MD who went back for training in integrative medicine MUCH OF WHICH involves the foods we eat. I believe it was Hypocrates who said “Let thy food be medicine and thy medicine be food”. I love that you have found a new way of living and that your determination was so strong you literally took your health into your own hands. I also love that you give God, the creator of your body, all the credit for your healing. I rejoice with you over your recovery, both from the ulcerative colitis and anorexia. You have an amazing story to share!

    Reply

    • Hi Darla, thank you so much for this encouragement. Yes, let thy food by thy mending indeed! And amen to that – I owe it all to Him! Thank you so much for your kindness this evening! hugs and love xox

      Reply

  20. What a great testimony! I can’t believe the amount of pain and suffering you went through – but the healing is truly a miracle! God is amazing, and you rock for sure!!!

    Reply

  21. Thank you for sharing this! I too follow a modified SCD diet due to food allergies/other physical conditions, the only thing different is that I do eat potatoes and dairy. I don’t think we should label it as “restrictive”, but rather it’s much more an act of self-care in feeding our bodies what we need and what works for us. I think that it’s unfortunate that your doctor looked down upon this method, but I’m glad it worked! I believe God worked His miracle through this diet.

    Reply

  22. Wow. What a story. You should write this up for the Washington Post and their medical mystery column in the Tuesday Health and Wellness section. Seriously. So many lessons here….what a story of persistence and healing, Thank God!

    I know that I’m not part of the food recovery group, but to me I see NO problem with the restrictive diet. That diet isn’t to address the anorexia, but the UC. I say (and yeah, like I carry any weight or significance, right?) that you are still a double or triple champion in what you’ve overcome with the AN, UC and EN. Dang girl…..you rock!!

    And even in the hospital, that radiant smile 🙂

    Because your heart remembers the days you prayed for the life you have now…and are grateful to God for it. Hugs!

    Reply

    • Hi Jeff, thank you so much for this kind reflection. Hah, I’ve never thought about that but maybe I will! Seriously though your words have touched my heart, so thank you. Sending big big hugs xox

      Reply

  24. What a touching, beautiful story you have shared. I am positive you have helped someone who is going on the same journey as you have been on.
    God bless you and your health

    Reply

  26. Thanks for sharing and for your honesty. I have had people in my church face some of these issues. Now I have another resource to give them. Bless you.

    Reply

  27. I hope you are well now. I have gone through trials also and still am.. There’s always something difficult you can’t tell the world. You have the courage to speak it and I’m very glad you did.

    Love, humility and prosperity
    Nam

    Reply

    • Thanks Nam. Yes, I am so grateful to be healthy now. I’m sorry to hear that you’re going through some things. I hope that they get better soon:) Hugs and love xox

      Reply

  28. We are our own worst critics, aren’t we? What you feared would bring negativity and abandonment has brought positive vibes and another level deeper with those whom you choose to share your story with. Thank you for trusting yourself, the process and us! I feel privileged to witness your healing. ❤️

    Reply

    • Hi friend! Thank you so much for your kind words. You’re right-we are always tough on ourselves. And yes! I am so grateful for the outpouring of encouragement! Sending big hugs xox

      Reply

  29. Thank you for sharing this truly remarkable story. I have often wondered why doctors don’t pay more attention to what their patients eat and drink. It seems obvious to me, but your experience is not that unusual I expect — in that regard, at least.

    Reply

  30. Wow, this post was truly inspiring. You are so strong! Please don’t worry anymore about your credibility. I believe you, and it’s amazing to see how strong you’ve become. 😊💜

    Reply

  31. Your story is truly inspiring – thank you for starting this blog and sharing how the Lord has shone His light in your life. God is truly an awesome and good God! May He continue to heal you and bless you in abundance! Stay strong <3

    Reply

  32. Courage woman, you have in spades! I have been so discouraged about finding answers to my son’s dietary problems or overcoming my own. Thank you for sharing this, I am deeply encouraged!

    Reply

  33. Thank you so much for sharing your story! I had 2 friends with UC who had their intestines or colon removed and supposedly are in the clear for their UC. Through my autoimmune diseases, my doctor has also prescribed me Prednisone. What do you know about its effect to young women, and how did it so negatively affect you (especially mentally)?
    You should be proud of your fight! <3

    Reply

    • Aw thank you so much for sharing this. I’m sorry you’re also having to go through ai issues. Prednisone made my personality frantic. I became manic and it intensified the racing ED thoughts in my brain. It also gave me the notorious “moon face” with big cheeks which was detrimental to my body dysmorphia, causing to to restrict even further. Lastly, a side effect is appetite stimulation, so I actively (in my eating disorder) did everything I could to not allow that to happen.) but yes it is bad for women’s bone density and my doctor, as a practice, does not prescribe it to women for that very reason. Hope that helps and wasn’t too rambly. Thanks for reading. Hugs and love xox

      Reply

      • That’s not too rambly at all! I have some liver as well as systemic AI diseases, and I haven’t anything BUT prednisone suggested to me. So I am quite intrigued by this and will definitely look into it. Thanks for letting me know!

  34. You go, Girl! Sometimes it’s really important to come clean in an outward way. I acknowledge you for your courage and honesty. I wrote a Practical Treatise for my doctoral degree, and one of the quotes I started it with is, “It takes great courage to see the face of God because you first have to look at your own.” -John-Roger, Forgiveness: The Key to the Kingdom
    Your post reminds me of this. Blessings, my friend. <3

    Reply

  35. So many times as a reporter, someone would tell me something they were embarrassed about. They’d whisper, shyly as if they didn’t want anyone to know fully understanding a million readers would see their story on Sunday. The ironic thing is that few, if any, told me something I hadn’t heard before. We are human and share in your story. We’ve been there in some way, and we are with you now. Thank you, once again for being brave enough to share your story. We are with you.

    Reply

  36. 💕 Praise God, you have been through so much and God delivered you from it. 🙌 I had colitis one time and the pain was excruciating.

    I think your blog helps people. You have a gift for writing. Thank you for sharing your stories from the heart. xo

    Reply

  38. Sending all the love and hugs I can. xoxoxo One thing I must add, every picture that you have shared, that is of you, is very beautiful. Before you shared this part of your whole experience, I composed a poem dedicated to you. You may find it on my page. I will keep your continued progress in my <3 and prayers every day!!

    Reply

  39. Awesome, BBB! Thank you so much for sharing this. It takes a lot of courage to not put food restrictions on yourself no matter how tempting. It takes even greater courage and trust though to change that and accept a restriction out of necessity as well as accepting that you are not in control of your life. It seems that God gave you the experience of freedom through not having restrictions, and then gave you an experience of another kind of freedom through SCD. May He be praised in all things! Could we call this moving from freedom to freedom like St. Paul’s “from glory to glory?”

    Reply

  42. Has anyone ever told you about the story how some Italian boy couldn’t eat pasta for a year and a half. True Story! It all came down to this guy’s diet. At the end of the day I’ll let you in on a little secret of my own. Mac and Cheese is a very bad college staple food, Very bad. I was GI for the longest year and a half of my life. Also when I was say GI I am not talking about an army recruiter named Joe knocking on my door.
    I say this often about you because I believe it. You’re stories, your life does make a huge difference whether famous or not it doesn’t matter. You’re biggest impact is writing things down for people to become encouraged by and for all intensive purposes to ” Get their faith up.” You truly are a woman who has beauty beyond their bones. Keep writing scratch that this is the virtual world, what I mean to say is to keep typing.

    Reply

    • Oh my gosh that is so kind of you to say, friend. I’m always grateful for your encouragement. Thank you. I’m sorry that you e also experienced gi issues. Sending you big hugs xox

      Reply

      • Don’t mention it I’m Canadian I’m supposed to be nice. I also took a little break from social media. I feel social media is most certainly useful but in the summer time it is away to neglect physical activity no matter what’s trending whether it be Lone Wolf tenor Jennifer Aniston writes for Huffington Post are the Cleveland Cavaliers win the NBA championship. There’s a time and a place for social media and summer time is not it. the reason I decided to take a break from social media is because as a journalist studying in school I’m going to be immersed in interacting with my listening audience September through April and sometimes August so a break from social media is necessary. I don’t look at it as a negative thing either I look at it as a way to study to be quiet soft and still. grab your bible for reference 2nd Timothy chapter 2 verse 15 I’m going to college to have fun I already have enough fun was Jesus. I’m going to college to bring in the Harvest because the laborers are few.

  43. You are a brave and beautiful person. You told this so well — I think so many will be encouraged. I love that you don’t dwell on why me? but you know God has been with you. I also love that you are setting shame aside and living honestly and wholeheartedly. Bless you.

    Reply

  44. You are amazing!..thank you again for your honesty, the things we go through in this life, though painful, mold us into who we are. Not that we are defined by what happens to us, but that what happens to us brings out who we really are. I believe that God has more healing in store for you, I know someone who was allergic to grains for years, she felt God tell her to eat bread one day, she did and realized that she no longer was allergic to grain! Thank God for the healing that has taken place in your life, it is truly a miracle, a testimony of faith. God bless you.

    Reply

  45. It makes perfect sense that diet would play a role in UC ~ lots of foods are cause inflammation ~ I’m so happy for you that you are healed/healing and having better days- that’s what life is all about. Prayer, prayer is a big one too- God showed you the way, I do believe.

    Reply

  47. Tom here!

    “God is most glorified when we are most satisfied in Him.” –John Piper

    The more I learn about you through your posts and your journey, the more I see about how and why you are learning to rejoice in every circumstance. It’s extremely encouraging and awesome! Have you ever heard of the MercyMe song “In the Secret”? What you just wrote here, Scripture talks about a ton in several places! But none more so than in Hebrews 12:1-2. You truly are focused upon the joy that God and Christ can bring to someone’s life. God doesn’t promise an easy life in following Christ, but He promises to be with us in every circumstance and to help us through the tough times! It is clear that He has proven that to you!

    Reply

  48. What a beautiful testimony to your faith and God’s love! Somebody who sees this is going to be forever changed and healed because of your faith and courage! Thank you!

    Reply

  49. I confess I actually prefer the blog without the moving and flashing stuff–maybe because my eyes and brain are no longer youthful. I love the photos in this one, tho. But mostly I appreciate learning about the diet as I’m a firm believer that what we do and don’t eat is essential, due to the fact food is from the earth and our bodies are created from the earth. If the food is in the form God intended it (which sadly many grains and such are no longer–hence screwing up our digestive tract) then it should prove beneficial. Secondly, I have a much younger half sister who has something akin to what you deal with, and I have a 12 year old child with D.S. who also has Autism. I’ll be doing some further research. Thanks for sharing.

    Reply

    • Hi friend, oh I’m so glad you enjoyed it! thank you 🙂 And yes – I hope that this may be of some help to them! and your right, it’s true that we literally are what we eat – or rather, our bodies function according to what we fuel them with! hugs and love xox

      Reply

  50. Thank you for sharing your experience of God’s goodness in this way! This was especially encouraging to read because just today I made the decision to adopt a very restrictive diet because of health issues. The decision came after months of uncertainty, but today through many means God alleviated my fears and showed me this was all part of His plan for me. Ironically, the verse He used to encourage me was Deut. 8:3, “And he humbled you and let you hunger and fed you with manna, which you did not know, nor did your fathers know, that he might make you know that man does not live by bread alone, but man lives by every word that comes from the mouth of the LORD.” This verse is a reminder to me that it’s not about the food itself, but about walking with and glorifying the God who made food and who made me. And coming to see that has definitely been a humbling process! So thankful our God is a loving, compassionate Father!

    Reply

    • amen amen amen. that is so true. I love that verse. I’m glad this was timely for you. Me too, I’m so thankful for His goodness and compassion as well! Wishing you the best on your new way of eating! cheers to health! hugs xox

      Reply

  51. Praise God! You and your sharings are a great blessing to me and I am sure all who read. Recognizing and sharing God’s miracle always pumps me up! You are amazing! Thanks be to God!

    Reply

  52. Well thank-you for sharing some more of your story! And it doesn’t surprise me a bit that changing your diet made the difference – God made us with an incredible body able to care for and heal itself if we just give it what it needs to do the job 😀

    And speaking of who you are and a little aside but I was thinking the other day about identity because I was reading in Daniel a while back and he was having this vision that made him afraid to the point of unconsciousness, he just went flat out on the ground in a faint. And Gabriel came to him and he was like, ‘Daniel, a man greatly beloved,’! And then he said fear not, and Daniel was like, ‘yeah I’m still a little weak-kneed here,’ So he touches him again and strengthens him with, ‘O man greatly beloved,’… because anybody can say ‘Don’t be afraid,’ but the real power against fear is in an identity of perfect love.

    All that to say, your identity to all us here has been BeautyBeyondBones and golly I sure hope all the empty crevices in your heart are just filled to bursting with the echoes of Father’s voice speaking that identity over you because that’s where your strength lies B, not in people saying ‘Don’t be anorexic it’s bad for you,’ but in Father’s love-lavishing voice saying ‘You’re my Beauty.’

    Don’t forget that identity.

    I know there was more to that thought but ya know what? I got all the important parts 😀

    Blessings (:

    Reply

    • Wow Carson, this is awesome. Thank you. I am sitting here just completely touched by your words. Seriously, you have a way of expressing things that is really powerful. Anywho-thanks for this wonderful reminder of that this morning. Grateful for you. Have a great weekend. Hugs and love xox

      Reply

  56. Thank you for the next installment in your story. I hold firm to the knowledge that people have recovered from every possible diagnosis. I am so encouraged by your story of an “improbable recovery” I think that believing there is a path to healing is the first step. Recognizing that the outcome is within Grace, turning it over to God, while taking action towards wellness. May your belly be happy always. And may the loving intent you send out be a beacon of healing to those who need encouragement.
    Xo

    Reply

  57. Thanks for liking a post on my blog for it led me here, to you, and your wonderful words of wisdom that have manifested from your experiences. I started reading hours ago and could not stop. Now, 2:30a and I’ve read most of your posts from the last couple of years. I can truly say that all that you have written is brilliant and very inspiring. God is truly working through you.
    Although much of what you have written I already have been taught by Jesus, my mind and soul needed to hear it again, especially the messages about loving yourself. It is so easy to forget to love ourselves, or worse, condemn ourselves amidst the errors we make. Thanks for reminding me that He loves me so much even when I am failing and broken.
    You have made this clear, consistently. I have a bi-monthly newspaper that focuses on positive articles and messages like yours, with a wide audience here in western Colorado that I am certain would love and benefit greatly from your wisdom and encouragement. Your writing style of opening yourself up makes me feel like I already know you personally and it would be a pleasure and an honor if I could re-publish and share your columns with them. If you are open to that, please let me know. You can check out our publication at http://sunshineexpressmedia.com to see if it is compatible with your goals. Thank you for considering my request, but mostly just thank you for doing what you are called to do. You are amazing and yes, very beautiful, inside and out! God bless you – Mikey, aka KingDaddy

    Reply

    • Hi Mikey, thank you for such kind words. I am so touched that you would take the time to go back and read my older posts. That means so much. Truly. And that’s awesome. I would be honored for you to share my work! I’m trying to broaden my readership and expand the venues through which I can reach people, so anything you can do would be greatly greatly appreciated. I checked out your publication and it really has some wonderful content. Feel free to email me beautybeyondbones@yahoo.com
      Thanks again! Hugs

      Reply

  58. Thank you for your honesty. In my fellowship, I often hear that there are many paths up this mountain. Your path is different from others because your health concerns are different and that’s okay.

    What’s important is that you’re healthy today and mindful of both diseases. Knowing yourself and what works will help you to stay on your recovery path.

    Best regards.

    Reply

  59. God heals when we are ready and usually not before and none of this makes your anorexia fraudulent or you -I am going to post this over at my wife’s blog – great sharing – I am so glad I just have Epilepsy and depression O and diabetes.

    Reply

  61. Oh my gosh – thank you so much for sharing this. I am so sick of being sick and have tried so many things with the foods I eat. Maybe this will help me. Can’t wait to learn more!

    Reply

  62. Well i must say again you gave me a wonderful post to read. I love your quotes about the past…thats what I want trying to tell myself but you put in much better words.
    I can relate to your struggles and faith in God. The only difference is I suffered only mentally (no physical deseases) just depression and it nearly killed me when I finally stood up to live again.Thank you for reminding me that I have to be grateful to God. Even though I follow a Religion but I always thought that the consequences and events made me stronger but now I realized it was God who chose that path for me.
    Plus I am glad you shared your suffering and we are always here to support you. your wordpress family xox.
    Now I will also remember to be grateful to God in my blogposts instead of just complaining. Btw what’s your name? Are u on Twitter?
    Always love you a lot xox.

    Reply

    • Thank you for this wonderful comment. I’m sorry that you’ve had to deal with illness as well. So glad you’ve experienced healing as well:) yes! I’m at @anarevealed on Twitter and @beauty.beyond.bones on Instagram! Thanks for reading. Hugs and love xox

      Reply

  63. Thanks for the amazing and personal testimony God is using you to bless many that come across your testimony and experience your faith in Jesus Christ Have a blessed day!! 🙏💓🙌😇

    Reply

  64. Thanks for sharing – the link between the food we eat and so many diseases has been largely ignored by the medical profession because there is no money in it. Meanwhile food manufacturers continue to poison food by stripping away vital nutrients and replacing them with all sorts of chemicals that are harmful. Thankfully we are now waking up to the facts and its great to see you ‘spreading the word’ Wishing you every healthy blessing!

    Reply

  65. I have a close family member with Crohn’s, and I see a lot of similarities between his story and yours. He was on Prednisone for a while too, and it seemed like he was acting like a total dick a lot more often during that time. (Someone else I know was also acting like a total dick when he was on Prednisone for reasons not related to Crohn’s or ulcerative colitis, but I think that’s just because this guy is a dick, period. Unrelated.) Anyway, he was also considering surgery, but he went against his doctor’s recommendations and stopped all the drugs, because he was convinced they were making things worse, and has gone on a very restricted diet for the last few years. He is doing a lot better. Now let’s just pray that he finds God in the midst of all this…

    Thanks for sharing.

    Reply

    • Thanks for sharing this, friend. lol your comments about prednisone made me laugh 🙂 I’m glad he is doing better. Yes, let’s pray indeed. Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox

      Reply

  67. Great story. It shows no matter how bleak things get there’s always the light of hope (God). He knows best and he does best. He is using you as a beacon of hope for others. Though you cannot heal them, your experience shares with them the way that leads them to hope. At the end of the day God is the answer but I believe in my heart that he uses others in his works for good. Young lady you are one of those good works. Be Blessed and keep up your great works, you will continue to be rewarded.

    Reply

    • Hey Corrie, thank for this. You’re right-there is always good in Him. Gosh, that is so kind of you to say:) seriously, I am so touched and humbled. Thank you. Sending big big hugs xox

      Reply

  68. Hey, BBB: Nothing that you have said here would ever cause me to doubt your faith that faith had healed you. Where people get into trouble is when they assert that their faith can heal others. Even Jesus did not assert that, always saying “Your faith has healed you.”

    Many medical doctors take the perspective that we are simply machines. They don’t see the whole person. That you accepted the wisdom of the naturopath against the pressure of your doctor’s derision reflects the strength that you found in the Holy Spirit.

    Reply

    • Thanks Brian, I really appreciate it. Yes, I am so grateful to God for His healing. The HS is a powerful powerful advocate and guide-what an amazing gift we were left with. So glad you stopped by. Hugs and love xox

      Reply

  70. So inspiring and very informative. I did not know the danger of Prednisone until now. My son was always prescribed with it in his asthma attacks. Thank God he doesn’t have it anymore.
    I wish you the best of health.

    Reply

  72. I had tears in my eyes as I was reading. You are a pillar of strength and determination. I’m so happy that you found the best medicine / cure / way of life through the SCD.

    I’ve watched a now-14-year-old girl go through Crohn’s disease since the age of 3-4. When she was diagnosed, she was the youngest case of Crohn’s that our children’s hospital (Children’s Hospital of the King’s Daughters in Norfolk, Virginia) had ever seen. But, through a strict diet and follow-ups, she’s avoided surgery and now lives a healthy, abundant life. She’s a star athlete, and a beautiful young woman.

    Thank you for sharing!

    Reply

    • Hi Laura, wow, thank you for this beautiful comment. I so appreciate your kindness. Gosh, that’s so tough. My heart goes out to that little girl. I”m so glad she’s living abundantly. I will keep her in my prayers. Thanks for stopping by! hugs and love xox

      Reply

  73. This is an amazing part of your story, thank you for sharing it with us all. It doesn’t make you a ‘faker’ to be living on a restricted diet, Being free of your anorexia doesn’t mean you gorge yourself uncontrollably no matter what, it means that you are no longer control by an unhealthy eating habit and are living your life eating in a healthier way (no different in that sense from someone who unhealthily over eats). Eating this special diet is you living healthy, anyone who says anything different is seeking to get a rise out of you and make you feel bad about what you are doing and shouldn’t be listened to. God has set you free and gives you the grace and strength to keep going daily.
    Blessings as you continue your journey.

    Reply

    • Thanks friend. You’re right, I’m living in the healthiest way for my body. I really appreciate your encouragement. amen to that — God is good! hugs and love xox

      Reply

  74. Glad you found the diet. It’s so important to be our own advocates. Being epileptic, I’ve learned that sometimes (most times) you have to fight for your health. We (especially women) know our bodies best. God bless!

    Reply

  75. I’m so proud of you for releasing this truth about yourself! It is SO brave.
    My daughters best friend has UC and autism as well. He is 10. He was on chemo drugs and then steroids to get his under control, and after 8 months is finally seeing progress. My daughter has stayed by his side and hung out with him daily to offer support and laughs. So, on that note, and pardon the pun, let all out sister. We are all here to support you and lift you up when you feel down. There is nothing we can’t do with the Lord by our side. Every step, every tear. Much love my dear💜

    Reply

    • Thank you friend. Oh gosh I am sorry to hear that. I’m glad he’s seeing progress! Your daughter sounds like an incredible young lady. Thanks for the encouragement Hugs and love xox

      Reply

  79. Being open about food issues and body issues isn’t irresponsible if you’re passing on a message of recovery and you should be given praise for that. I never talk about my history because I just not strong enough to admit that publicly.

    My sister also has UC, she was diagnosed when she was 14 and while she’s had a hard time through parts of her life because of it and while it can’t be cured it can be helped.

    I really do wish you all the best for the future

    Reply

  81. The Lord used your blog today to confirm something that has been rolling around in my head for the past two days. The new Switchfoot album is “Where the Light Shines Through”. If you have heard the title song (by the way I think Jon Foreman is a prophetic poet!) the hook line says, “The wound is where the light finds you, the wound is where the light shines through.” This one line has been “haunting” me (in a good way?!) Having been through years of fruitful but very painful ministry at times, I have reached a transition point where I have a choice to allow the pain to become my redemptive story or a “ditch of bitterness” that derails and disqualifies me. I was praying this morning about allowing God to “permit” more of the pain that comes with following His path. Then I read your blog. Thank you for your honesty and allowing the Holy Spirit to use your “wound” to let “the light shine through”. I have worked with teens and young adults for the past twenty years and your story is much needed for this generation. Have you ever considered speaking?

    Reply

    • Wow this is such a powerful reflection. I love that lyric. I’ll have to look up that song because I’m unfamiliar with it! You know it’s funny, I would actually LOVE to to speak, I just don’t know how to get hooked up with the circuit. But I want God to use me in whatever way He wants! Thanks for your encouragement. Hugs and love xox

      Reply

      • I am good friends with two youth evangelists who travel the country speaking and ministering to teens both in churches, camps and public schools. I would like to pass your blog along to them, I have been reading your blog for some time and have been touched by your gifted communication, honest reflection, courage in overcoming and perseverance in faith. God is using your testimony through this blog…I think He could do so even more through speaking opportunities. I will leave my email below. Either way, keep doing what you are doing! God is using you! Prayers, Grace and Peace…Tom. (aldrichtom01@gmail.com)

  83. What an amazing story. You have taken something that was so difficult and turned it into something positive and so inspiring! I am glad you are feeling better and I wish you all the best in the future 🙂

    Reply

  84. I have found that courage and faith work together but not always at the same time or at the same strength. But you know who is “growing” both so you will be okay – and get even stronger. Good job and praise God!

    Reply

  87. My brother has either UC or atypical Crohn’s (his symptoms are wacky). I’ve got liver damage. We’ve both had to learn how to eat in ways that help rather than harm our bodies. My diet is different from his, but that’s fine and also kind of the point – what works for one won’t work for all. I’m so glad that you found something that works for you. Thank you for sharing this part of your story!

    Reply

  88. I’m so glad that you discovered SCD rather than having drastic surgery and shame on the doctors that would try to discourage your nutritional healing experiments through fearmongering. Removing foods that harm you and keeping foods that work for you and the monitoring that is required to work out which is which is a million miles different than obsessive calorie monitoring and restriction. That is nothing for you to be ashamed of at all and your story of healing could help so many people – it’s something to be proud of, go you! x

    Reply

  89. Great post 🙂 Taking into account everything you said, it is joyful to know that things are going great for you right now and hopefully in the future too 🙂 Anyway, keep up the great work as always 🙂

    Reply

  90. Beauty! I’m so glad you decided to share this part of your path! For me, this makes you more real, if that makes sense. I could not doubt your honesty, having read you from your first post. I heard the pain that was once yours; that’s hard to fake. You know how I originally reacted and the blog I wrote about BBB.

    I understand the anxiety over appearing to be dishonest. I go there too at times. I just try to remember that no one bats 1.000 in being accepted by others. Once you claim that truth, there is great freedom. You’ve claimed it now, even if nervously, and have been rewarded with everyone’s affirmation. Well done, you!!

    Reply

    • Hey Jeffrey! Thank you so much for this. You’re right-there is great great freedom when you claim the truth. I’m just so grateful for God healing power in my life! Hugs and love xox

      Reply

  93. It took a lot of courage to write what you did and it was a beautiful thing to read. It is true that some may doubt your recovery because of it, but their opinions do not hold more weight than Gods, and that is a truth you share with Him. Continue to persevere and grow! You deserve it!!

    Reply

  95. Love the way you acknowledge God throughout your recovery. Yes suffering happens to all of us, no one is immune to it, but through that suffering we build character, we build empathy we have compassion. Yes miracles still happen today and prayer healing is a great way to go, because doctors as much as they are helpful, are not God. God bless your life

    Reply

  96. I cannot even begin to imagine what you must have gone through… You’re absolutely right, God is in everything we do. As always, thank you for sharing and inspiring.

    Reply

  98. My goodness, my friend. I couldn’t help but wince with my own pain reading some of the symptoms you were experiencing. Praise God for His healing physically and for His growing hand spiritually!

    Reply

  99. This really touched me my friend! Get sharing what God has put in your heart for you have become His heart, His empathy and His grace. Folks will usually criticize that which they cannot relate to or do not understand.

    Please do not focus on that or them. The lives you are helping and saving will provide all the love amd appreciation by the one more day of hope you have helped them to experience by your testamony.

    Be encouraged my friend and I thank God for your courage, heart and healing!

    Your friend and brother in Christ,

    Pastor Lionel

    Reply

  100. All praises belong to God! I’ve been praying for you and you have been on my mind. I know it was the Holy Spirit speaking to me to pray for you. I didn’t know your story but I knew you were a believer because you almost always “liked” my post. When I don’t see you I get concern. I appreciate your transparency and you have blessed millions by your testimony ! Amen I love you!

    Reply

  101. Thank you for sharing. Can I send you a print for your open-heartedness? Let me know which image you’d like on my blog. I hope you are having a beautiful day! -Hope

    Reply

  102. I appreciate your openness with sharing about your struggles and what you’ve gone through. I don’t have UC, but I do have an auto-immune disease (narcolepsy and cataplexy) and I can – to a certain extent – understand how it feels when no one really gets or understands what you have. I love how you said about God teaching us things through suffering. I think that’s so true. I know I wouldn’t be where I am in my walk with Christ today, if I had not gotten narcolepsy and cataplexy. Anyway, thank you for sharing 🙂

    Reply

    • Thanks for sharing this. I’m sorry that we can connect on AI issues, but am so glad that we’ve both found the freedom that Christ brings. Know that you’re in my prayers:) sending hugs and love xox

      Reply

  105. What an encouraging testimony. My nephew has Crohn’s disease and is living an active life, currently a pitcher in college baseball, being wooed by major league scouts. But it’s been a constant battle.
    What you said about doctors not looking at diet (especially with digestive diseases) is sadly true.The same is true with how cancer is treated (people diagnosed with cancer should check out Ty Bollinger’s “The Truth about Cancer.”) The problem is, they’re not trained in nutrition, mostly in treating symptoms. I’m glad you went to someone who understands nutrition and healthy living.
    The good news is, God has designed our body to heal itself when given the chance with the right foods, exercise, etc. I think you’ve proven that! 🙂
    Blessings to you.

    Reply

  107. I think it was a very good idea to share your U.C. story. You are able to reach out to other people struggling with that. To me it makes perfect sense that a certain diet could help together with God’s intervention.

    Reply

  109. You are a true blessing in my life. I luv your transparency, and you inspire me I says I can’t even begin to explain BBB im wishing you the best!

    Reply

  113. This is awesome of you to post. It’s crazy because I actually have Crohn’s disease, and I have gone through a lot of the ugly stuff you have. It was totally not a coincidence that I happened to click on your page. This was so encouraging!

    Reply

  114. Knowing the “Complete” story of Beauty? There’s a phrase in the scriptures that says “be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father in heaven is perfect”. “Perfect”, in this sense, is not “flawless”. Rather, it is “complete”. And by Complete, it means “having all the necessary pieces that make you WHOLE”. All your struggles and successes, your sicknesses and life…these make up You…the Complete You…the Perfect You. No need to apologize for being more Complete in who you already are…as we strive to be a bit more like Him as well . It’s exactly what Father in Heaven wants us to be.

    Reply

  115. Thanks you for sharing your secret, it’s really brave of you. I too am in recovery from Anorexia and have an autoimmune disease (I have SLE/Lupus). I was diagnosed in September of the year I graduated and a few short months later I slowly began the descent into Anorexia. The two were absolutely linked. For me I think it was a way of regaining some kind of control over my body, that felt totally out of control. It was also a way of beating myself up, as I blamed myself for my autoimmune disease, feeling I must have done something to deserve it. Like you, I’m now working hard at dealing with the illness and seeing the light at the other side, although I’m not a practising Christian so my methods are slightly different. Like you, I’m finding blogging about it very helpful. Keep up the good work! XX

    Reply

    • Hey Natalattef, thank you so much for sharing this. I’m so sorry that we have that that connects us, but I’m so glad you’re on the life-giving Journey of recovery. Know that you are in my prayers and that I am rooting for you. Stay strong warrior. Your courage is inspiring. Hugs and love xox

      Reply

  117. Thank you for having the courage of Paul who, while imprisoned, proclaimed that every part of his life is for the sake of glorifying God. Amen.

    Reply

  119. Big hugs and love right back, Sister. And I thought Irritable Bowel Syndrome was tough to live with. Some people might say it’s not a miracle. It was just a change in diet. Not saying that’s true, but even if it were, I have no doubt the reason you found a diet that worked was because you were in prayer and seeking God. And hey, if being able to recover from both anorexia and UC and live a healthy and happy life is not a miracle, tell me what is?
    One suggestion: Next chance you get, put up a link to your ecookbook.

    Reply

    • Hey David! Thank you so much:) you’re right-God is good and he definitely had a hand in it! And yes! I’m working on it! Going to at least post a recipe here soon. I would attach the cookbook link, but it has my name on it … So I’m working on it:) but thanks for that suggestion! Noted!! 🙂 So glad you stopped by, Hugs and love xox

      Reply

  120. Thanks for sharing this! I have had severe problems with eczema and have had to be on Prednisone several times. It is the worst! And finally, started to realize that it was diet related, too.

    thanks for sharing your story and your testimony of God. This was an inspiring post!

    Reply