The Secret Garden


As you may know, I’m an actor. I’ve been working since I was five. And hands down, my favorite role was Mary Lennox in The Secret Garden.

Maybe it was because I got to throw ridiculous temper tantrums on stage, or perhaps it was because the costumes were so beautiful, or the music, but it was always my favorite role. I played it twice.

Anywho, this show, for those who are unfamiliar, is about a little girl, Mary, who arrives at her uncle’s house after her parents die from the cholera. Her uncle’s mansion is full of despair: he was jilted in love; his son, Colin, is bedridden and cannot walk; and the garden is dead. Long story short, with Mary’s arrival, she brings the house back to life: befriending Colin and teaching her Uncle how to love again, as well as bringing the garden back to life.

So anyways, my favorite song from the show was this duet I sang with Dicken – who was the hired gardener. And it’s called, “Wick.” Which, yes, I know – let’s all get the giggles out now — Wick is a funny word. Dicken is a funny name. Ha. Ha. Ha.


OK, moving on.

Wick, refers to the state a plant is in just after winter: it appears dead and lifeless, but it will actually grow in spring. That plant is “wick.”


So my older sibling knows every word to that song. It’s actually quite hysterical. Can recite it verbatim – including the accent.

And sometimes, when I get homesick, I listen to this song.


And as I was listening to it yesterday, the lyrics struck a new chord with me. One that eight-year-old me didn’t quite grasp at the time. Because although this song is talking about the garden, what it’s actually talking about is life. And in my mind, what it’s really talking about, is recovery.

(Full lyrics at the end)

When a thing is wick, it has a light around it.
Maybe not a light that you can see.
But hiding down below a spark’s asleep inside it
Waiting for the right time to be seen.

When a thing is wick
It has a will to grow and grow.

And all through the darkest nighttime
It’s waiting for the right time.
When a thing is wick, it will grow.

This song – gosh, it just speaks to my heart when I listen to it today. I think the combination of going back to that time of when I was a small girl and living fully-enveloped in my passion of acting, and then having the message of this song hit so close to home, really gets to me.

I’ve already talked about having the “will to grow” – So I’m not going to bore you with that.


Here’s what speaks to me:

I love how this particular recording includes the conversation in the beginning. Because it reveals the state of the garden. Mary goes,

“The garden is dead, Dicken. It’s the most forgotten place I’ve ever seen. With loose, grey branches, and dead roots and leaves all tangled up on the ground.” 

She had completely given up on the garden. Lost hopeIt’s dead.

#RealTalk here for a minute: that’s how I was before I adopted recovery. I had completely given up. Given into ED. I felt I deserved to stay in the hell I had created for myself in my anorexia.

And for all intents and purposes, I was exactly like that garden: with dead roots and leaves all tangled up on the ground — what a great visual. But I was. I was lifeless. Seventy-eight pounds, 90% of my hair had fallen out, the relationships in my life (with friends, family, God and myself) were abandoned and in pieces. And frankly, there was no hope in sight. I was entrenched in the disease. I was that dead garden.


But you know what? I came back to life.


There was a teeny, tiny spark of light inside that was able to take hold and propel me to adopt recovery and bloom.

That spark was Jesus, FYI. But you already knew that 🙂


And all through the darkest nighttime. 

The darkest nighttime.

I don’t know about you, but sometimes, it can seem pretty dark. And this extends far beyond just eating disorders as well.


We all deal with dark “nighttimes.” Disappointments, loss, betrayal, discouragements, jealousy, addiction, depression, stress from job/family/life/school — these are all things we deal with that can make us seem like “dead gardens” from the outside.

But no matter how dark or how long that “nighttime” lasts, that little spark of hope is still there. It’s simply asleep. It’s just waiting for the “right time.” It’s waiting for you to be ready to nurture it back to life.

But it’s there. Sleeping. Waiting for you.


Recovery is like caring for a garden. You have to nurture it. “Clear away the dead parts so the tender buds can form.” You’ve got to nourish yourself. Be gentle with yourself. Choose to love yourself. Choose life. Every. Single. Day.


Just like a garden. You can’t just water it once a week and hope for the best. No. It’s a full time job. Several times a day. Caring for it. Clearing weeds. Adding fertilizer and compost to create fertile soil so it can thrive.

And thrive it will.


It will flourish like gang busters.

And so will you.

So if there’s an area of your life that seems positively dead right now, just remember, it’s only wick. It will grow.



Hey op, hello there Mary
Hey op, hello there
And why are you in such bad temper?
The garden is dead Dicken
It’s the most forgotten place I’ve ever seen
With loose grey branches
And dead roots and leaves all tangled up on the ground.
Now did you take a real close look at anything?
Mary the strongest roses will fair thrive on being neglected
If the soil is rich enough.
You mean might be alive, but how can you tell?
Oh, I can tell if the thing is wick.
Wick, I’ve heard Ben say wick.

When a thing is wick, it has a life about it
Now, maybe not a life like you and me.
But somewhere there’s a single streak of green inside it
Come, and let me show ya what I mean.

When a thing is wick, it has a light around it
Maybe not a light that you can see
But hiding down below a spark’s asleep inside it
Waiting for the right time to be seen

You clear away the dead parts
So the tender buds can form
Loosen up the earth and let the roots get warm
Let the roots get warm

Come a mild day, come a warm rain
Come a snowdrop, a comin’ up
Come a lily, come a lilac
Come to call, callin’ all of us to come and see

When a thing is wick
And someone cares about it
And comes to work each day
Like you and me

Will it grow?
It will
Then have no doubt about it.
We’ll have the grandest garden ever seen!

Oh, Dicken, I want it all to be wick
Would you come and look at it with me?
I’ll come every day, rain or shine if you want me
All that garden needs is for us to come wake it up
But Dicken, what if we save the garden,
then Uncle Archie takes it back,

or Colin wants it?
What a miracle that would be, gettin’ a poor
Crippled boy out to see his mother’s garden.

You give a living thing
A little chance to grow
That’s how you will know
If she is wick, she’ll grow
So grow to greet the morning
Leave the ground below
When a thing is wick
It has a will to grow and grow

Come a mild day, come a warm rain
Come a snowdrop, a-comin’ up
Come a lily, come a lilac
Come to call, calling all the rest to come
Calling all of us to come
Calling all the world to come

Oh, somewhere there’s single streak of green below
And all through the darkest nighttime
It’s waiting for the right time
When a thing is wick, it will grow.

— Talk to Me! —
Tell me what you think of the new layout/format!? I do this for you guys, so if it’s not working for ya, or you have any other suggestions/feedback, please let me know! 🙂 xoxo BBB

112 responses to “The Secret Garden”

    • Thank you so much! Acting has always been a passion of mine. I’m not in NYC pursuing it as a career and nannying on the side. But basically, performing taps into a part of my soul that nothing else can. Thanks for stopping by!

      • Absolutely! They’re great for everyday life – not just acting. They’re great for speaking in front of people, improving confidence/creativity, thinking on your feet, and they’re just plain fun! I’d especially suggest improv classes. Hilarity guaranteed. 🙂

      • OK. I was thinking the same thing. For some reason for the last few days, I’ve been really intrigued about actors and how they get into the frame of mind of a character and are able to bring this character to life. Recommend any books on the subject? Hey, thanks a lot! Take Care. I’ll visit often.

  1. I didnt know that was u!!!!! I feel honored that u follow my blog and actually read it… My favorite elementary school movie 😘😘😘😘

  2. I love how you lay out your blog with all the pictures and how you make it so easy to read… I can’t always get on WordPress due to a very busy lifestyle… But I do enjoy your blog when I get a chance to do some reading. It’s really cool that you take time out to write here on this site… I know you must live a busy life as well… There’s no other blog quite like yours that I am aware of… Once again thank you!!!

    • Oh my gosh, thank you! That really means a lot. Seriously. Thank you for such positive feedback. I’m honored that you take time out of YOUR busy life to stop by! 😊😊😊 but the pictures are honestly one of my favorite parts to do. I feel like you can communicate so much through images. — I put them on Instagram throughout the day. (@beauty.beyond.bones) if you wanna check it out 🤓😉have a wonderful evening 🙂 btw cool profile pic! Love the drawing

  3. “The Secret Garden” was my fahvorite child-hood book and I still reference it in my thoughts, often. The character I identified with is Colin…long story. The format is great! Thanks for sharing.

    • Thanks Pam. Gosh such a great story. However it’s told – through book, stage or screen – it really touches the heart and spirit. Yes, Colin. The transformation he makes in the book is incredible and inspiring. Thanks for stopping by!

  4. This whole blog post is just truly inspiring 🙂 Then again, all of your blog posts are inspiring 🙂 Your comparison between a dying garden and what it felt like when you were battling anorexia is spot-on 🙂 I am so glad that you are not going through all that sadness anymore 🙂 The two songs with the lyrics that you post also finish things off very nicely 🙂 Anyway, keep up the great work as always 🙂

    • Thank you so much, John. My goodness, I am so glad I’m not either! God is good and I am so thankful for his deliverance. Thank you, as always for your thoughtful comments, John! I hope you have a lovely evening!

  5. Is it weird that the movie The Secret Garden brings up tons of emotion for the boy who couldn’t walk? I remember watching it up to that point when I was a child and having to turn it off because I felt guilty that he couldn’t walk and I could. I felt GUILTY for a movie actor! I think in recovery I have felt guilty for taking time to work on my life or enjoy things in life. I am getting better at it, but I do have to remind myself sometimes that it’s ok to weed my personal garden and work on becoming the beautiful woman God wants me to be.

    • Wow a beautiful comment, Ellie! You have such a precious heart:) yes, Colin’s story definitely pulls at the heartstrings. You’re so right though- tending to your “personal garden” is so important. It’s an act of self-respect and self love. Thanks for sharing these lovely thoughts with us! Glad you stopped by❤️

  6. Beautiful post. I love that you related your experience to the garden and blooming again. It’s a wonderful message…and omg I loved The Secret Garden. I’ve never seen the musical but I watched this move over and over when I was a little girl <3

    • Thanks Chelsea! Wasn’t that such a beautiful movie?! The scenery, the costumes and movies. I think every little girl wanted to be Mary at one point or another. Thanks for stopping by xx

  7. Thanks so much for liking my “justinqueso” blog post earlier! Secret Garden is one of those movies that I’ve (unfortunately) not seen, but as a mental health professional, I really appreciated the imagery of the lyrics. The idea that something/someone might appear dead when there’s actually opportunity for growth is so hopeful and empowering! Great read 🙂

    • Thank you Lizzie. There’s something about the SG that everyone can appreciate — whether the moving storyline, the magnificent costumes, hauntingly beautiful music – it is timeless and a treasure. Thanks for stopping by! Xx

  8. wick is also a Yorkshire term for ‘alive’! I didn’t know there was a song for The Secret Garden called Wick, that’s really cool! Thank you for your inspirational post 😀

  9. Thank you for following my site. It’s great to see that someone is enjoying it. Also, thank you for sharing your story. I honestly believe personal, real stories are the most effective way to reach people’s hearts.

  10. It takes REAL courage to face your demons. Kudos. But, the absolute core and key to your Recovery… Is Jesus Christ. And I believe you already know that. What I will offer you is insight, understanding and kinship with your soul. I’ve allowed my soul to write about my spiritual journey and I’d like to share it with you. There are some 140+ “short stories” on my web site, where each Reveals a smidgeon of insight into my soul. My purpose is to help others increase their Self-Awareness and Perspective about themselves, leading to an “alignment” of your core values with your actions, behaviors & relationships. Please take the time to rummage through my mind @ The Inspired Verse. Recovery isn’t just about changing your thoughts… It’s about changing YOU. Looks like your “growing” again and that is Great! Keep the positive energy flowing and embrace the Light that has found its way back into your soul & being. God Bless you Kate.

    • Thank you so much MW:) I appreciate your kind words. I will definitely check out your short stories this weekend! Thanks for stopping by and for being a source of thoughtful encouragement! Have a blessed weekend 🙂

  11. This is a wonderful post.

    I enjoy the story of The Secret Garden.

    But more, I enjoyed reading of you acting in it and how the story and the wick applied to your life before. It gives us all strength to read how with the help of Jesus you have been able to grow strong.

    The layout is good. I found it easy to read. Your use of the images was spot on. Like songs in a musical, they helped to move the posting on to its next stage.

  12. Wow. Beautiful insight into a song I also love. That was the first Broadway musical I saw as a kid. Isn’t it amazing how we can find a deeper meaning like that so many years later?

  13. This is beautiful, and superbly captivating, a musical is always alluring for it can withstand time. Storytelling and Music told/sang in its absolute form, glory, and wisdom is by far an art that is still on it’s infancy. No treasure can match the “worthiness” of its everlasting gestures. Well done, and more power to you in the future to come. You have gained a big fan in me. Thanks.

    • Oh my gosh thank you so much! That really means a lot😊 you’re so right: musicals are timeless. And the Secret Garden is especially beautiful and powerful! ThAnks for stopping by!

  14. This is ‘oh so beautiful and captivating~ly cultivated. “The Secret Garden” is an inspiring and educational thoughts of our day to dirt- life and its dilemma. It also shows how it can flourished through by forth bringing the hymnal ways of living through our respect, love and faith in GOD and all that is bestowed upon us. Any kind of stories /musical about nature is always alluring to me for it has the power to withstand and endure the past, present, and beyond while it biosynthesis as time cries-passed us by. Your wonderful musical reminds me how magically sown our life here on earth. I had written once that “A Story-intimately-told is Immortal”and after reading your magnificent work, now, I wrote this as much as …
    ” A Music~majestically~heard is Eternal”. A fiber that holds our very own flesh and nourishes our living souls and by whom I thoroughly believe that no treasures on earth can match the importance of this old wondrous and free teachings of values, morals, guidance that has long been forgotten and neglected in today’s youthful and younger generation.
    I, myself, would often incorporate within such “coolness” so to speak just to connect with my junior and younger peers and not to give a hoot what my own or senior peers would think of me, if it may be a foolish act of how, then so be it, I shall make my self the biggest fool as long as my objectives are meet. My daughter at the tender age of eight can now write, read and recite poetry, telling stories and has an acute appreciation for music, all of course ‘still in such infancy stage, although I don’t know why she thinks rhyming is always important when she writes 🙂 but nevertheless it is deep within her, and I can’t wait what she can create and accomplished with it as she progressed on her own, ( makes me wonder and wandered as I ponder the possibilities ). One of my goals in life would be to have but just one chance to try to reach out to other youth and show them “what else is still out there besides all that is now out there” and I am so glad that artist such as yourself can reach out in such a similar manner and fashion, and for that I thank you deeply.
    Forgive me for over expressing myself, the reason being is that you just gave life to One of my many untold ideas. A sort of a musical called “You are my Sunshine” which was originally a short-silent~script /pantomime /musical, that has been long tucked in my mind/heart, might just perhaps be able to reach ink-to-paper-or-so-thanks-to-you. The story lines are nothing in the same, but the life lessons and messages are quite similar, and by reading your magnificent “The Secret Garden” it just catapulted it importance value to the top of the haystack! ( Makes me wonder of other things as well. ) 🙂 Thank you so much and I will be reading more.

    A friend/fan,
    E G TEN

    • Thank to fiendish a thoughtful comment! Your daughter sounds like a sweetheart! I appreciate your encouragement and support so much. You are my Sunshine sounds like a great project! I would absolutely be interested in reading/watching it 🙂 thanks again for stopping by!

  15. One of my favorite childhood stories…as an adult in my fifties, when I want to feel nurtured….I will pick it up and read it again. I enjoyed your reminder of the story, the “wick” in the plants.

  16. The Secret Garden has been in my top 3 favorite musicals for 2 decades now and Wick has always been one of my most-loved songs from the show. Wonderful post! (BTW, do you still sing/perform in musicals?)

    • Hi Brooke! Thank you so much! Yes, it is such a great show! I do still song and perform! Not live anymore, but on short films and stuff. And I was in a band for a while:) thanks for stopping by!

  17. It’s late. I spent last Friday driving 12 hours to get home. I crashed all weekend. Today was 10-11 hours up to Chicago for the week. I get to the hotel tonight only to find just how bad the flood of emails is. I do what I can till I can feel my head start getting soft. The only way I can think to describe it. But I figure I should get my BBB fix. Just one. I’ll read more later this week. And this is the next one for me. Wouldn’t you know. I don’t feel wick tonight. Not a bit. But God had you tell me I am, so… I guess that’s good enough.

    You done good, kiddo. The right message at the right time, and you didn’t even know it. 🙂

    • Hey Jeffrey! Oh gosh I’m sorry you’ve had such a long day! I’m glad this has spoken to oh in the way you needed to hear:) I’ll say some extra prayers for you tonight that you can make it through such a demanding week! Thanks for taking the time to read when you’ve had such a long day! Sleep fast!

  18. My favorite acting role of all time was the white unicorn, you know, the animal that Noah wouldn’t bring into the ark! Anyway, Beebs, you’ve done a phenomenal job climbing the hill, but it’s time to crest it and come down the other side, if you know what I mean. Life can be good. Life can be fun, but isn’t it about time to find the meaning of life itself? Beyond your Savior, beyond your best friend, the meaning of life itself…for you, personally. Sorry, I’m a butt. I mean, an ass, or whatever. But I just worry that you’re getting caught in a rut, and you don’t know how to get out. Maybe I’m wrong, but maybe I’m really wrong. I’m not worried, though. The next time they come for me, I’m planning for it to be their last. I ain’t gonna be around for another round, if you know what I mean. I’m putting it all into one throw of pitch and toss and expecting to lose! It’s what I want. Is that what you want? I doubt it. But in the end, I think it is. I think it’s what everybody wants. Rest. Peace. Relaxation. That’s what Noah’s name means. The word “Noah.” They wanted it then. We NEED it now. But there’s only one way to get, and you need to lose your last fear to get there. Crest the hill. That’s all I’m sayin. Lose the fear.

  19. So beautiful! I know you posted this several months ago, but I just now read it and loved it <3 brought tears too ~ thank you. Secret Garden is one of my favorite books. I read it with my daughter when she was younger and we cried! I'm going to share this with a friend – thank you for the inspiration. xo

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