Blood Ties

Posted on by beautybeyondbones

I had an experience the other day that really stuck with me: an encounter that stayed in my soul.

Ever since my mom’s stroke, I feel like people can sense something different about me. It’s like, I’m walking around with this neon sign that says, Tell me your secrets, my life is in shambles!

Something like that.

Or I’m just super non-threatening.

Like your anti-Regina George. More of an Anne of Green Gables type.


Either that or Mary Katherine Gallagher.


But however I read, I just feel like people — strangers — have been really open with me.

Like the other day…

If there’s one thing that’s true, it’s that I hate going to the doctor. And I know, the irony isn’t lost on me, because wouldn’t you know…my sibling is a doctor.

So this was the first I’d been to the doctor in, oh….five years or so. I had to go get a check up on my Ulcerative Colitis.

Anywho…the only thing I hate more than going to the doctor, is getting blood drawn.

Goodness gracious, I nearly pass out when someone comes near the inside of my arm with a needle. No ma’am.


So, of course, how did my appointment end? In the blood lab.

But you see, I’ve developed a coping mechanism: I get the nurse to distract me with a story…Right after I tell her I’m deathly afraid of needles.

So here I am, asking her how she’s doing, and I inevitably end up just babbling on about my own life, to keep myself from thinking about the whole needle-situation taking place on my arm.

So, eyes clenched, and mouth running, I’m telling this woman about my mom and how she had a stroke, and that I’ve been her recovery sidekick since December. And I was just spouting off about how even though it’s been a hard season that it’s actually been a blessing that’s brought us closer and strengthened our family.

And after I felt the release of the tourniquet and the relief of the bandaid, I opened my eyes, only to find this sweet nurse with tears running down her cheeks.

She could barely find the words, she just silently cried, nodded, and pointed to herself.

She proceeded to tell me about how she had some sort of brain issue on one half of her brain, and that she had finally saved up enough money and scheduled the surgery, but that she hadn’t told her kids yet, because she was afraid of how they were going to take the news.

She just poured her soul out to me, as though it had been bottled up for weeks, just waiting to explode.

I stood up and gave her the biggest hug I could, and we just stood there for about 45 seconds, in a bear hug – her big bosom shaking through sobs.

I don’t know what came over me, but I whispered to her that God was going to get her though it. And I told her that I would be praying for her.

She just looked at me and smiled. “We were supposed to meet today,” she said.

Driving home, I couldn’t help but feel incredibly trivial that I was so concerned over a silly little needle, when that kind woman was grappling with a burdened heart and spirit.

And it just made me realize how, so many people are walking around with incredible pain and fear. And how, sometimes, all they need is someone to share it with…even if it’s just an arm on the other end of the needle.

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I didn’t do anything earth shattering that afternoon. I just listened, and gave her a hug.

Because sometimes, a hug communicates everything the other person needs to hear.

The fact is, we can make a difference. We can be a light to someone in the dark. And it starts with the people that God places in our lives — even the people administering the needle of doom…God places people in our lives for a reason — sometimes for our benefit, and as it turns out, sometimes for theirs.

So she was right – we really were supposed to meet that day.


Thanks God. Thanks for letting something good come from that interaction.

***A little update:

Well, I wrote this post from my apartment in NYC. I’m going to be here for 3-ish weeks, and then hop back and forth, splitting time between NY and Ohio 🙂 At least that’s the plan for now…Thank you all for your prayers and encouragement during this transition.

Oh…and the results of that blood test and my Ulcerative Colitis check up? — 100% healthy

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Lastly, get up to 40% off, site-wide at Reebok using my promo code: MEMORIAL . I hate to “promote” stuff,  but I am honestly obsessed with my new MET Classic kicks, and this deal was too good not to share with you 🙂


OK, see ya Monday!

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BBB: Because we're all recovering from something. // For speaking/business inquiries: beautybeyondbones@yahoo.com

232 thoughts on “Blood Ties”

  1. I know I have said this a dozen times but I just love it! God puts all His children right where He wants them to be. I love reading how amazing His hand is at guiding us straight to who needs us or who we need, right when we or they need it! Thanking Him also that your tests came back clear, and saying a prayer for that sweet lady God sent you to help, and her surgery. God bless you! 🙂

    1. Thanks so much Margaret! you’re so right — God knows what we need and will put the people in our lives to fulfill it! yes! lots to be thankful for. thanks for this. big hugs xox

  2. Great news on your health. I have ulcerative colitis as well so I definitely understand the celebration in that. Sounds like you have so much to celebrate. God is working in your life! Thank you for sharing your story with the world. Your light makes a difference!

    1. Thanks Tammy! Yes I’m so grateful for that news. I’m so sorry that you know the woes of UC too. Have you heard of the Specific Carb Diet? I’ve been following it for nearly 5 years and it has kept me in remission! Thanks for stopping by and for your kind words. Will definitely be keeping you in my prayers! Big hugs xox

      1. Thank you! I don’t follow the Specific Carb diet, but I do gluten free and I am really mindful of what I eat and it does make a huge difference. I will look into the Specific Carb diet. I am always open to what may help me feel better! Thank you!

  4. Part of my having had an “interesting” life thus far is that people have told me their secrets and burdens since I was a child. I think I don’t need to be anyone special for this except to be a good listener and to keep the secrets secret. This may be my “mission in life,” but it’s not difficult if I don’t judge people.

  5. I am an atheist, I don’t believe in the relevance of god on this, but what a great difference you made today! People can be good regardless of what they believe.

  6. If you haven’t read it, Henri Nouwen’s “The Wounded Healer” might be of interest. It’s a wonderful meditation on your experience today: because we experience our own wounds, we are better able to minister to others. It’s a stunningly beautiful book, all the more so since it helped me convince myself that all the time I spend in addiction and actively running from God could have a larger purpose and that I can be a better minister because of those many painful years.

    Glad to hear your mother is doing well enough for you to travel to NYC! If you like, come to the Church of St. Paul the Apostle on 59th and 9th, right by Columbus Circle (shameless plug). That’s the Paulist Fathers Mother Church and where I’m serving this summer.

    Peace.
    Rich

    1. Hi Rich, thank you so much for passing that book along – I’ll definitely check it out! And how awesome! If I’m in the neighborhood I’ll have to stop by! Thanks for your powerful perspective! Hugs and love xox

  7. You are an angel on earth. You are one who has beautiful things to say, who touches others so deeply, and who is one that others can literally kneel before and let out their tears too. You are a light that no NYC blackout can ever darken. You glow like every color of the rainbow!! xoxoxoxoxo

    1. Oh my gosh, you are just too kind!! Seriously, Migueltio – you have absolutely made me smile from ear to ear. Thank you. And thanks for reading all my posts tonight 🙂 have a great rest of your evening xox

      1. Hey I gotta bring out those precious dimples!! You always make me smile!! 🙂 🙂 Its always a pleasure to read you blog!! xoxo

  8. Big believer in “everything happens for a reason” – she needed a shoulder and there you were….sometimes we all need a shoulder.

  11. Hey Caralyn. I believe that all who are serving Jesus have Divine Appointments, and when you had one of these Appointments in the Doctor’s office, you knew it, and knew what to do. You heard God, listened to the nurse talk and cry, and gave a big hug. Many times those are the best things you can do for someone.
    This shows, and proves, the special lady, special person, woman of God you are.
    We are all blessed by knowing you. I can’t even imagine how blessed the people are who know you personally, and actually have a face to face relationship with you, sitting down over a meal, tea, or coffee, or in a Bible Study.
    God’s Peace as you will be in NYC for a while, away from your Mom and Dad, may your mind and spirit rest in Jesus Christ. Praying the Comfort of Holy Spirit be within each of you, and your Mom continues to strengthen.
    God’s Blessings,
    Luv.
    George.

    1. An appointment at an appointment 🙂 hehe thank you so much George. I think you’re right – sometimes a hug is the best thing you need. Thank you your incredibly
      Kind words. I am truly touched. Thank you. Thanks for your continued prayers. You’re a great friend 🙂 Hugs and love xox

  12. We troubled ones seem to have some sort of bond. just back from a Ascension Day dinner at my church and just by chance at my table of 6, two women and three man (Me included) had lost our spouces in the last year. Maybe God wanted us to all sit at the same table. We are not pleasant company for people not on the Grief journey.

    1. Oh gosh, wow. I definitely think God brought you all together for a reason. I hope it was a healing and comforting gathering 🙂 thanks for stopping by. Hugs and love xox

  13. That is so. Beautiful. Father is so beautiful, and so perfect in his timing and placement of us. It kind of makes me think, the way things just happen and so many times it just seems like a freak accident, like what if you hadn’t just babbled, that whole encounter would’ve been different. It comes as a great comfort to me to know that Father can and does live through us even when (and maybe especially when) we aren’t particularly conscious of it. Maybe that’s the result of all the conscious time we spend with him, asking to be used, or maybe it’s just the willing spirit of our ignorance? Haha, whatever the case….thank-you Father for not being limited by me.

    Congrats on that great result! Happy pre-weekend! (:

    1. Thanks so much Carson! Yes! He really is so perfect in His timing. He always gives His kids exactly what they need. Amen thank you Father! And also- a big thank you to Him for a clean bill of health!! Have a great night! Hugs and love xox

      1. Hard lives are short lived, thankfully. Maybe, I’m just not one of God’s. The Natives were always the heathens. It’s okay, I mean I never was good to keep score. I always thought, well God must be busy I’ll help my neighbor, friend, stranger.

  16. AMEN…
    Jesus went through all the towns and villages, teaching in their synagogues, proclaiming the good news of the kingdom and healing every disease and sickness. When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. Then He said to his disciples, “The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest to send out more workers into His harvest field.” Matthew 9:35-38

  17. I have the great good fortune to be disfigured, so it has always been obvious to me that what draws people to me is my surrender to the purpose of allowing love’s light into the world. It was only in my fifties that I realized love IS God, but that’s because I’m not terribly wise…

    1. Allowing love’s light into the world. wow – now that is a beautiful thing to do. thanks so much for sharing that, Brian. I would have to agree — you DO bring that light!! it shines through you and your words 🙂 big hugs xo

  18. There are a few things you really got your arms around here, and I enjoyed it all very much. Detailed comments over where the Cool People hang out!! 🙂

      1. I’m glad my comments resonated with you. Remember the Tiffany lamp image? That’s how beautiful we all are when we have God’s “light bulb” shining from within. I couldn’t help thinking of the older gentlemen at the grocery you wrote about some time ago. Another example of someone else seeing your light on.

        Thank you for the affirmation that you see His light in me! There are days when I’m not too sure!  God blesses us in at least two ways, doesn’t He? He blesses us with His ministry to those who don’t yet know Him and with His ministry to our “team mates” in Christ, bolstering each other in our faith.

        My week started poorly, but ended very well yesterday, so, just like a bad movie with a good ending, it gets a decent review! HA! I’ll make home early afternoon today, and will see my Shweebie Pie when she gets home from work (don’tcha just love pet names?)

        I trust NYC has your battery almost fully charged! God bless you, my friend! Big hugs to you!!

      2. I do love that Tiffany lamp imagery. So beautiful. And good! I’m glad that your week ended better than it started! Same to you, I hope you have a great long weekend! Hugs and love xox

  19. Great! You found your answer. Also great you are healthy. Even greater, you can release pain of other people. Not many can do the same. Without being trivial, I think this is a great gift. Keep on helping others.

  20. Let me just say, I love reading your posts. God is using you in so many ways. I believe He places us where He needs us to help others by sharing our stories. So thankful your blood work came back great 😊

  22. Yeah I know their is a lot of people scare of needles but I don’t mind needles, but we all scare of something and that what make us human.

  26. I LOVE this. Thanks so much for writing so beautifully! It’s so true that sometimes if it’s heavy, we should stop carrying it. Thanks for the reminder to be open to sharing the burden with others who are hurting!

  27. Yes..needles 😭😭 I’m having a local on the 13th to deal with a toenail issue 😂😭 Seriously not looking forward it. But I feel after the other days events in Manchester these things feel so small 😟

  28. Love, love, love this story! God uses us in the most unexpected ways sometimes! By the way, I’ve loved reading over a few of your posts…I struggled with Anorexia as a preteen. I love your boldness to share your victories and your vulnerabilities. Keep shining your light!!

    1. Thanks so much Courtney! Yeah it was a really special moment. I’m sorry we have that as a common thread in our pasts but I’m so glad we’re both in freedom! Hugs and love xox

  32. Awww, sweet friend, I am so proud of you! For the decision to split time (great though exhausting compromise- you got this) with your mom and home 2 and to listen and show love and just be open like that. I cannot help but think that God looks at you, drops down little diamonds and smiles so big! 🙂

    1. Thanks so much Tonya 🙂 You’re so kind to share in the excitement with me. oh gosh, what a comforting image — that just brought a big smile to my face to think of God looking at me from Heaven with love. Thanks for saying that 🙂 big hugs xo

  34. My dear friend,

    What a lovely story with a deep background! When we become aware of the sufferings of other people then our own fear is getting less and less -as we are aware how brav other people are when facing a bigger operation or having heavy loads on their shoulders to bear, like sorrow with pain, kids, partner, money and so on – and as you did: your own fear become small but your heart opened and poured humanity over the nurse through a compassionate hug – my friend, this is exactly what we all need: to help each other in our sufferings – then sufferings are shared and weigh only half the weight as when suffering lonesome.

    God has surely arranged this kind of meeting and it is a practical example for all of us.

    Thanks for sharing and have a nice weekend
    Didi

    1. Thank you so much Didi. You’re so right- when we live, keeping others in mind, it is a powerful thing. We were created to help and love one another. Thanks for your kind words. Hugs and love xox

  35. I love it – as always!
    You are a blessing and a great encourager. ☺
    And the good news is that we can all encourage others if we look – and pray – for opportunities.
    Imagine what kind of world we would have if we all did that!
    Why, it would be heaven on earth! And isn’t that part of what it means to pray “Your kingdom come… on earth…” What fun to be part of the answer to that prayer!
    Thanks once more for sharing your life with us and being an encouragement and a blessing.
    With love,
    Stephen 💝

    1. Thanks Stephen! Gosh you are too kind. Thank you for your generous words. I think you’re right! It’d be heaven on earth indeed. Thanks for always being so encouraging. You’re a great friend! Hugs and love xox

  37. Thank you for sharing this moving story Caralyn – reinforces the view that we can use our experiences, however challenging to help others.

  38. I am drawn to your blogs time and time again, they are inspirational. . You come over as a very warm, amazing soul. Keep spreading the love of Christ to everyone you meet. Big Jesus hugs to you!

  40. Reminds me of a book I read, The Great Dance, by C. Baxter Kruger. In it, he talks about how we all participate with God as he interacts with a with people. In wanting to comfort this woman the Lord brings you along to participate. That’s a simplification that doesn’t do the book justice. But you are right about God wanting you there for her. And she was right about both of your destinies to meet that day. God is awesome!

  42. I guess this kind of answers “why?” to some things. All this time, you were being prepared for this moment. Who knows where it all ends? We only know that God is in this life even in the smallest details.

  43. Hello Pastor! You have written another beautiful message which you can easily convert to one of your sermons! As a Gentle Witness, I remind people to listen, then listen some more. Your meeting was a God-event, not coincidence! Thank you! I am praying for you and your family! Say hi to your Mom for me! Ps; l closed and re-opened my blog all in a period of 2 days! It is open while under constuction! I hope you will wander by, in your spare time 😊

    1. Hey Rick! Listen and listen some more. I love that advice so much. Thanks for your prayers and kind words (as always) 🙂 very grateful for you! Hugs and love xox

  45. That is an amazing story. I believe with all my Heart, that God puts us in the paths of those that we can encourage, and also get encouragement from. We have such a bigger purpose in life, if we would only get out of our own way and let God direct it. Thank you for sharing this story. Also, I am happy to hear your health is on track!

      1. My pleasure! You reminded me of something that I had forgotten. God can use even our worse trials to bless others.

  47. So glad to hear that the checkup went well , praise God always . Yes, God always sends Angels among us, as the old song by Alabama says. GOD always knows what we need before we know. It could be anyone, even a stranger. Prayers always for you and your mother. Keep on blogging and Praising God. I Love it!

  48. Why don’t you write about fire or something cool! Blood draws are not cool! I’m trying to understand the title of your article and how it relates to your subject matter. Can you help me out? I mean, is it because you got blood on the ties of your Reebok shoes? Killer shorts, though. I keep looking for some ’70s style running shorts for running, and around here the businesses just deny deny deny as though basketball were the only actual true bona fide sport for humanity.

    1. hahah blood on my Reeboks, now that’s funny…nah, what tied that woman and my spirit’s together in that moment was literally her taking my blood. maybe a little too abstract?

      1. Well,okay, I’ll take that. Blood ties is usually family of a direct line. My argument is that for the premise to hold, that is, your pun, to literally hold, you would need a long-term relationship with this woman. And maybe I’m wrong, and maybe your hug was more than just a “hug”, but I’m just a man who questions everything, even the littlest details of some not-so-obscure blogger’s puns.

        To make the pun fully and legitimately accurate, tying both the vial and needle to blood family lines would take a lot of work. That’s why it is often said, Easier said than done. You wrote once that a woman can do all a man can do–and more. I guess I just expected more of you. Unless, of course you and this nurse become and are intending to become eternal friends, legiti blood lines, as it were in a celestial sense. I don’t mean to judge too hastily, and maybe those were your intents, an eternal friendship bond of sorts with a nurse who draws blood. That was why I asked. But I only speak as I see, and question accordingly. As per differentiate between truth and error, between solid and falsehood, between gospel and Apostasy. I hope you understand. If not, you are free to attack.

        Caution: friendships for eternity are NOT an issue to be taken lately. As may in saying, to “cast your pearls before swine, or that which us holy unto dogs, lest they turn and rend you.”

  49. It’s always so nice to hear two strangers helping each other. I’m so glad your test results came back negative!

  50. This post gave me chills. I’ll be praying for that amazing lady. You have such a kind heart. It’s so amazing the way the Lord uses us to spread His light and love!

    1. oh my gosh, you’re so kind to say that. Thanks again, Robyn! You’re on a reading roll! haha 🙂 thanks again for the prayers. know that you’re in mine too! hugs xo

      1. You’re welcome!! Haha yes! I hadn’t had a chance to read your posts right when you posted them this week so I wanted to get caught up! Thank you!! 😊 Huge hugs right back!!

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