Well, tomorrow marks the three year anniversary of my mom’s stroke.
And as I sit here in the car, with a tight chest and a lump in my throat after realizing that fact, I figure, it’s probably a good idea to let some of these feelings out, and write about it.
There is not a day that goes by that I do not thank God that He spared her life that snowy December night three years ago.
Being with my mom when it happened, and seeing her be carried, lifeless by my father — Marissa Cooper style — into the emergency room, unsure if she’d make it — that changes you. It does something to your heart. To your perspective. To your appreciation for life and loved ones.
And so every day, every single day, I am grateful to have that incredible, kind and loving woman still in my life.
To say that a lot of life has been lived between now and then would be quite the understatement.
I mean, aside from relearning how to talk – my mom has developed a new motto that I have come to adopt, and really respect.
You see, my mother is the queen of advice. To be clear: I’m not talking unsolicited advice…but rather, true, grounded, here-when-you-need-her wisdom. She *always* knows what to do, what to say — always. And as a result, I am always calling her to get her take and her perspective. Because it’s always *spot on.*
I mean — she is the originator of the motto that got me through recovery from anorexia: “Just do the next right thing.” — Yep, that was a Mary-ism.
So, her new tag line, since her stroke, is, “Do it, and do it now.” With an emphasis on *now.*
And every time she says it, I always chuckle, roll my eyes, and kind of finish the sentence for her. Like — I know mom, do it NOW — but the fact is, she’s absolutely right.
I don’t know about you, but I can be as indecisive as a toddler in a candy store. I absolutely *hate* making decisions, and I am the queen of procrastinating. And let me tell ya, that, is a deadly combination.
Do it, and do it now.
There really is no time like the present. And I know that is such a cliche – but the truth is, we are not promised tomorrow. My mom found that out the hard way. And, believe me, kneeling by her bed that night, pleading for God to let her wake up and live another day — so did I.
When something is important — why the heck wait? If something matters, freaking go after it. Relationships, jobs, dreams, education, that “whim” trip you’ve always wanted to take — we have been given one life. We have one go at it. And if we’re not doing absolutely everything in our power to maximize the life we have, frankly — we’re doing it wrong.
“I have come that you may have life, and have it to the full.” John 10:10
As 2020 is upon us, my challenge to myself — and subsequently to you — is to figure out what matters to you, and then go do it, and do it now.
Because tomorrow is not a sure bet.
Mom, (I know you’re reading this — as you do every single post — and every single comment) Mom – you are my best friend. My hero. My heart twin. And I am so grateful for the tenacity with which you have attacked the challenges you’ve faced these last three years. Your fortitude and courage, positivity and joy are so freaking inspiring, and I hope to one day be half the woman you are. I love you to the moon.
“This is what the Lord says to these bones: I will make breath enter you, and you will come to life.” Ez 37:5
A big thank you to my foundational sponsor, BetterHelp Online Therapy. I cannot begin to express how beneficial therapy was for my recovery from anorexia. Speak with an online therapist. Or check out content about eating disorders from BetterHelp.
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