Evesdropping on a Plane

Hello friends and happy Monday!

I don’t know about you, but it seems like a lot of life has been lived in just these past four days, since Thursday.

Just a quick note — I wanted to share a podcast episode that I was interviewed on! It’s called Fireside Talk Radio, and this first episode (in the two-part series) dropped this morning. I so enjoyed my conversation Cathy — so if you’d like to check that out, you can listen here. And thank you, Cathy, for inviting me on your show!

Alright onto tonight’s post!

Confession: last Thursday, when I was flying back from Utah to NYC, in addition to writing that emotional blog post, I also did something not great on the plane…

I was evesdropping.

Ugh, I hate to admit it…but hey. It was a silent plane, and these two men – sitting directly in front of me – were having a lively conversation, and just putting it out there! So it was harder not to listen, than to listen…if that makes sense.

Any who…my interest was piqued because…the conversation was about God.

Now, let me just set the scene here…these two men did not know each other. The one — we shall call him the evangelizer…was probably about 60. Wearing what you’d find at a wilderness convention. There may have been a fishing hat/fishing vest involved, I can’t be too sure. Definitely some facial hair. And hiking boots.

The other man — we shall call him the evangelizee — was a young New Yorker. Late twenties. Handsome. Dressed to the nines in a crisp white button-down with –either avocados or giraffes — all over it, a la J Crew, in a size that was definitely too small, but showed off his biceps, leaving no question that this man worked out. In other words, I for sure noticed his entrance. Especially because he gave me that “look” when he sat down — you know the one. The sly smile that basically begs — Please, enjoy the gun show, muh-lady.

OK – so now we’re caught up.

Anywho – during the flight, wilderness man was talking to biceps about God.

And – I’m going to stop with the witty nicknames now, because it actually was a powerful moment, that captivated me for much of the flight.

But there was one exchange in particular, that really struck a chord with me — to the degree that, well…it’s stayed with me until now…four days later.

The older man was talking about God, and the younger man said, “You know, I’m spiritual, and I’m cool with that…but I just don’t know if I can believe in an actual God. Your God of the bible and all those stories, and organized religion…it’s just too much for me.” And with that, the younger man got up to use the lavatory, and came back with his airPods in his ears for the remainder of the flight.

And it was at this point, in the whole episode, that I realized that I had been experiencing a very personal matter, for this young man. And perhaps, I should have put in my own ear buds and butted out of the exchange.

But nevertheless, here we are.

It definitely made me think. The whole “spirituality” verses “God” argument has been hotly debated, especially in this new age realm of today, where people put more faith in crystals and horoscopes than in anything coming from “church.”

And frankly, I get it. I can see the appeal. A desire to become a higher version of yourself, escape the chaos of reality by emptying the mind, and trying to tap into your spiritual self — listen, that sounds absolutely marvelous.

That journey to self-peace, and finding abundance, and centering yourself in gratitude — is truly beautiful.

And if we’re being honest, a vibrant prayer life includes all — well, most — of those things.

But here’s where they differ.

God loves you back.

And that is a scary thing for a lot of people. Myself included.

Spirituality is a one-person-show. You tap in, you tap out. You are the curator of the experience. The self-betterment. The self-discovery. The self-awareness…it is a singular, contained, episode — which, is great — but you’re on an island.

With God, it’s not about the take…it’s about the give.

It’s about giving yourself, your time, your heart, to the God who loves you enough to die to save.

It’s a relationship.

And I think that’s where the approach avoidance comes in, with a lot of people. Sure, maybe I’m playing armchair psychologist right now, but I think that closeness scares people.

Maybe it’s due to past relationships that left wounds, or a belief that one is undeserving of that love and closeness, but the truth is –by opening your heart to God, it will change you.

His love changes you.

You’re no longer in a controlled environment where you can determine the degree to which you let go, or feel peace or ground your mind. No. An encounter with God completely takes you out of control. You are thrown into the ocean of His love, and you just never know where the undercurrent or the undertoe is going to take you.

You surrender that autonomy. That control over outcomes, and emotions, and frankly, the protection of the wounds you’ve been botting up or hiding away because it’s safe.

God is not safe.

He shows you a mirror, and gently brings to light those difficult things that need redeeming, so you truly and fully can become that higher version of self, that so many are seeking.

But you don’t get that through trying to empty yourself.

You get it through filling yourself with His unending love.

Bicep man, I felt for him. I mean, heck — he was just getting on a four hour plane ride, probably not expecting to have a philosophical debate when all he wanted to do was sleep. Especially not with sneaky little ears listening into such an intimate conversation.

But perhaps wilderness man was able to plant a seed in his mind.

I was frankly stunned that in 2020, someone would have the nerve to talk about God and evangelize on an airplane of all places, where you’re stuck next to the person for the next several hours, should things not go so smoothly!

It is easy to do life alone. It is much more difficult — and simultaneously more fulfilling — when we invite another in to do life with us. Especially when it comes to God.

Because with Him, we can do the impossible. We can change our situations, and our hearts, and even, change the world. And that is a terrifying thing.

“This is what the Lord says to these bones: I will make breath enter you, and you will come to life.” Ez 37:5

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172 thoughts on “Evesdropping on a Plane

  1. Ha, whelp thanks for liking my post cause it led me to read a couple of yours! Unfortunately I was or probably still am bicep guy (w/o the biceps). However, and probably luckily, I married a woman whose mother is very religious. She is the most compassionate woman I have ever met. Her capacity for kindness gives me shivers. Addition to my MIL my wife and I have started to read a book together that is rooted in God and the Bible. It calls for me to lead us in prayer a couple times a week. Honestly I thought prayer and meditation were the same thing. I realized I had NEVER prayed. I was so scared to do it. I found it odd that I was afraid to mess up a prayer but I didnt neccesarily believe in God. We’ve been reading it a couple weeks and my prayers have become more natural and I actually find myself praying on my own. You absolutely nailed it, spirituality is rooted in self. Prayer is rooted in God and the two are VERY different. Thank you for another great post.

    Motorcycle Wisdom

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    1. hahhahahha hey – no shame in the bicep game 🙂 hehe but for real – we’re all on a journey together 🙂 thanks for sharing your story – sounds like you have some pretty awesome women in your life 🙂 Yes!! Prayer can defintely be frightening — and even something that causes selfconsciousness. It always comforts me to remember that God listens to the heart. So happy for you!! thanks again for stopping by. Hugs and love xox

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  2. Greetings and I know it’s been a while since I’ve commented–busy life gets in the way with things such as church leadership, new job, and other things that prevent me from writing and reading 🙂 On this post, it is hard to commit to anything, above all a relationship. Anything that requires us to remove us from our throne is difficult to commit to. God requires that of us–to give him control over our lives and hearts. And honestly, the evangelizer seemed to give up the moment the evangelizee pushed back even a little. To be fairly honest, the generation of believers before and now this generation of believers never put much stock in pursuing theology which is also the knowledge of God–which is the ultimate pursuit of any believer–to get to know God and enjoy Him forever! And on the part of the evangelizee, I can see the apprehension…the Body of Christ constantly screws up! But as my favorite Bible College professor once said–any time you get a group of reformed sinners together, they’re gonna screw up eventually. Anywho, hope you’ve been well and I hope your mother is doing better! Sorry I lost track! Prayers out to you and your family!

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    1. hi friend! so great to hear from you! oh gosh no problem at all 🙂 You’re so right about that – He really does require that of us. Amen! Thanks for your kind words and prayers! big hugs xo

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  3. I have to report that I take umbrage regarding your sweeping generalizations regarding spiritual people. Having spent 45 years engaged in a spiritual practice, meditation, having had deep connection with the Divine all of my life, with God and Christ. for myself and others like me I feel slighted. I don’t like being reduced to the lowest common denominator.

    I have heard there has been a kind of fad amongst many that seek “mindfulness” that may subscribe to some of the elements you have described. However, I expect more from you as a public figure and leader in the Christian Faith to set an example of the highest integrity to treat others with respect – like Mr. Biceps for example. You know nothing of his spiritual leanings really, you are assuming aren’t you? Is this the Christian thing to do?

    I am disappointed in you and feel sad that you appear to be treating “spiritual” people in an assumptive and judgemental manner. I do know that its most likely not your intention to assume as you would not like others to make assumptions about your faith (as I’m sure that many do).

    I have been moved by all of your blog postings except this one. It seems out of character for you. I feel sad that you have fallen prey to the divisiveness that is – well everywhere. I am not a church goer and I believe in God, Spirit and Jesus Christ having been touched by Him at the early age of 4 as I have previously described and I have had a spiritual practice for 45 years.

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    1. Hi Kai, I’d like to apologize that my words offended you. I meant no judgement when talking about spirituality. I have many many friends who practice spirituality, and I fully support their journey. Perhaps the tone that was coming across was the passion in my heart for the role that Jesus has played in my recovery. During inpatient, we were given many “mindfulness” tools to implement into our healing, and I found they all were empty for me personally, without Jesus. I fully appreciate that that was just my experience, and that for others, it may not be the same. I am happy that you’ve found such a positive tool in spirituality. And i cheer for you in that endeavor. Again, my deepest apology to you, Kai. Sending big hugs and love x

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  4. That was very beautifully said ❤ and you hit the point on the nail! People love spirituality so long as they are in the control seat, “they are God.” Christianity means the continual death of “self” and selfish desires that cause many to cringe and yet if they knew that in our “death” God makes us new creations, filled with Himself…how could our own selfish desires ever compare to His selflessness?

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    1. Aw thank you so much 🙂 you’re right about that — the continual death of self. what a powerful thought — especially right now during Lent! Hugs and love xox

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