Puzzles.
They’re the previous generation’s version of Angry Birds or Bejeweled.
But I must confess: I absolutely love them.

I rarely do them, because let’s be honest: every ounce of free time I have is devoted to BBB, but I do love a good puzzle.
So I make the kids I nanny for do them with me 🙂 hehe
#JobPerks
But it’s really neat to watch the excitement in their eyes when they get a piece that fits.
Now, I’m just gonna be straight: I’ve got mad puzzle skillz. Yes, with a Z.

But I’ve done enough puzzles to know the method: edges first, then work your way in.
I know, I’m a pro 🙂 Hold the applause 😉

But kids don’t know this method.
So they’ll be like, battling exhaustively with an edge piece — or for heaven’s sake a corner piece — for like 5 minutes. So I’ll gently ask, “Do you want some help with that, buddy?”
“No, no! I can do it!”
Five more minutes pass. They’re still struggling.
“You sure you don’t want me to help you?”
“No way, I got this!”
Alright, alright.
So I’ll sit by, and watch them strain tirelessly, meanwhile, knowing exactly where the piece goes.
Until exasperated, they’ll say, “Ugh! Help please!”

And as I was sitting there watching them struggle, I thought to myself, I bet this is how God feels.
*Please note: I am in no way, shape, or form comparing myself to God.
But I bet that’s how He feels. He’s up there, ready and willing and wanting to help, but we’re too stubborn, or determined, or proud, or whatever to ask for help. We want to do it ourselves.
And what father, or babysitter, would forcefully snatch the puzzle piece out of the kid’s hand and be like, “Here, let me do it, you moron!”

Not a good one, I’ll tell you that.
God wants us to ask for help.
Gosh, I spent a lot of years struggling with a particular puzzle piece of my own. Anorexia is a lingering disease. And even though you can get in a “normal” or “nearly normal” weight range, inklings of the disease can still loiter: whether that’s overexercising, binging, restrictive eating, orthorexic-tendencies, body dysmorphia – for me, it was (and still is) self-love/worth issues. Which, I’m making strides in that area, but I still have a ways to go.

But in other areas of life, too, we can struggle: gossiping, breaking a destructive habit like gambling or promiscuity, binge drinking, excessive shopping – whatever it is, “I can do it myself!”
And sometimes, we can mistake that struggle for God’s absence or indifference.
But have we ever considered that maybe, just maybe, He’s standing by, just waiting for us to ask for assistance?

How long in my recovery did I struggle and slip up time and time again because I thought I could do it myself?
A lot.
It was my pride that kept me from seeking help, both from God and from others. Pride that, “There’s nothing wrong with me.” Pride that, “I’m capable of doing this myself. I don’t need help. I’m better than that. Recovery is beneath me.” How truly ugly those thoughts were. That sickening pride kept me struggling my with my “puzzle piece.” Kept me from freedom.
All I had to do was ask for help.

We don’t have to try again and again and again, beat our heads against a wall, exhaust our spirits and our wills. We just have to say, “You do it.”

So maybe I’m reading too much into my puzzle moments with the kids I nanny for.
But I don’t know. God often times winks at us when we least expect it.
So let me ask myself and y’all this question to ponder: “What’s stopping you from handing over the struggle?”


One of your best posts, I think. Why? Because it is a lesson I think that everyone needs to learn, and your post led into it so well.
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Oh thank you so much Harry:) I’m glad you think so. I really appreciate such encouraging words💖 have a lovely afternoon!
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I really love this! It made me realise just how similar our lives are to a puzzle, sometimes we find it hard to get started but there are times when we can fit all the pieces in the right places. I like to think we should keep living for those moments. Great post xx
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Thank you so much Clara! I love this perspective. A lot of wisdom here. How sweet those moments are indeed. Thanks for reading!
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Funny how as a parent, watching your child fail is the most awful experience. Its hard to give them over to God, but necessary to remember that he knows best. Thanks for the reminder!
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Thanks for this reflection, Shell. Yes, trusting that God is in control and makes everything for good is always so difficult. But necessary. Thanks for stopping by! Xox
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This is very insightful, BBB, but I have a sneaking suspicion that sometimes your little puzzle builder may also enjoy just having you near to them, and deep down be unwilling to learn because that might mean they would have to do the puzzle without you. I hope that they grow to have confidence in your constancy.
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Thank you so much for these affirming words. I so enjoy spending time with the kids I Nanny for and always end up learning so much from them! I hope they do too! Thanks for reading!
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I love puzzles too! We just finished one tonight.
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Oh how fun! Congrats ☺️☺️☺️
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My experience has been that working through life’s problems requires that we attend to what else is going on in our lives, the lives of those we love and in others . Being at peace with ourselves & moving toward our goals are challenges. Puzzles present a strategy for understanding and coping.. Good post!
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Thank you Lori! What great insight. You’re absolutely right: life is a big puzzle and we have to be aware of how, not only ours, but others’ puzzles are going too. And being at peace with ourselves is a huge piece of that. Thanks for reading and this awesome perspective. Hugs and love to you!
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So true!!! Glad you had that revelation. Great post and continue to trust in Him always!
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Thanks so much Mel:) yes, trusting him, though difficult, is always the best decision! THanks for stopping by and for your kind words! Hugs!
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Hugs!
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❤️❤️❤️
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Ohh you have done such a great job in putting thoughts in writing, I was literally laughing when I was reading and felt like somebody was actually telling the whole writing in person 🙂 you have great skills!
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Oh my gosh thank you so much for this encouragement! I’m so glad you enjoyed it ❤️❤️❤️ yeah I never th to take myself too seriously — I’m always down for a laugh! Thanks for stopping by! Hugs xx
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You have a great skill, I can see you doing great things with your writing in the future! Best of Luck 🙂 one more regular reader just joined your writing world – Me 🙂
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Aww❤️❤️❤️thank you again xox
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“edges first, then work your way in.”
Isn’t that true of all of life? May I repeat that? I’d love to use your words as the title of a new essay.
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Hi again Kitsy! Thanks 🙂 absolutely. I’d be honored! Thanks for your readership this morning and all the thoughtful and encouraging responses! God bless you! Hugs!
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I LOVE puzzles too and there is one behind me just egging me on – mainly bc it is 750 pieces and I do better 500 and under. LOL!
I love your analogy and I fall into that I’ll do it myself all the time.
I do start with the edges also and I sort according to colors and most times I’m very surprised that those two pieces went together b’c it did not seem possible.
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750! wowzers! So glad you stopped by! thanks for taking the time to read! hugs! xox
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You write awesomely. I enjoy it very much. I put a picture on Twitter of the puzzle. I spoke to you about “Press This”.
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Aw, thank you again. That’s right! yeah, I have no idea what that’s about…I’ve never used that feature before. ANywho…have a great night!
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I struggle with this in my life. Especially with the situation I am in now. I don’t feel like God is there for me so therefore why give Him/It something that I should be able to get through myself?
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Hi Clarissa, thank you so much for sharing this. Handing over the reigns and trusting in God’s plan and timing is definitely a scary thing. For me, I find peace in knowing that I don’t have to go through these things alone. Thanks for stopping by:) hugs and love to you xox
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Haha I do the exact same thing with my kids when we do puzzles and they NEVER understand what I’m doing! Lol! But love how you worked this in with our Father and our struggles and our addictions. I can just see God shaking his head while I did something wrong for the upteenth, but he was always resdy to forgive 🙂 oh and +1 for the Constanza reference. Seinfeld rocks!
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Haha thank you Joel:) yeah I love Seinfeld! You’re right though-god’s patience with me always leaves me speechless and in awe. Thanks again for stopping by☺️☺️
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Same here. His patience just highlights how much of a loving Father we have and just how he can look at us through Jesus’ eyes and say to us, ‘No sin for you!’ Even after we mess up. Thanks and have a great night! 🙂
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Isn’t His love amazing?! 🙏🙏🙏
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Such a WONDERFUL post!! Loved every bit. I enjoy almost all sorts of puzzles and oh boy, I so agree with everything you talked about in this post. The analogy is perfect! Sometimes small, insignificant things can make you go into deep thought and I do that, too! Can’t express how much I agree with all that you’ve said here! 😍
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Thank you Phantom Paper! That really means a lot! So glad this resonated with you ☺️☺️☺️ have a beautiful afternoon, and thanks again for stopping by! Sending love and hugs xox
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Right back atcha! And you’re very welcome :D!
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❤️❤️❤️
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I love a puzzle, I think I’ve got made Skillz too…
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Haha yasssss🙌🙌🙌😂 thanks for stopping by! Hugs xox
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Thank you for giving my post a read.
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No prob☺️❤️❤️❤️
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[…] took the shame I had been carrying around, and He transformed it. He made beauty from […]
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[…] still holding control over the process a lot. I still need to let go. I keep coming back to this post I read on the blog Beauty Beyond Bones a while ago, because it speaks to this point so […]
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Thanks for the shout out!
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When I first read ‘puzzles’ I thought you meant like crosswords, sudoku etc and I was like “OH MY GOD I LOVE PUZZLES TOO!!??!?!!?” Then I copped you meant jigsaw puzzles haha. I like them too, edges inwards! Always!
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Hahahah that’s funny! But I definitely love crosswords and sudoku too! ☺️ thanks for reading friend! Have a lovely weekend!
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Thanks! It snowed today for the first time this winter (I’m in Ireland) so this weekend is either going to be really good or really bad haha.
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Ireland! Wow! That’s awesome ☺️☺️☺️ random question, but have you seen the movie Brooklyn? It was nominated for an academy award and is about Ireland. Really good movie! Enjoy the snow! Xoxo
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LOVE Brooklyn! It is spot on! Very moving, as in that is how people many moons ago had to emigrate etc but hilarious. There are little things that are real Irish- like when they go to the beach and are changing under their towels haha.
I will have to think of some other Irish movies similar to Brooklyn and let you know!
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Thanks! Yeah I actually saw that movie at its premiere at the Sundance Film Festival. So it was really cool cuz the cast and director was there and there was a Q and A. But yeah-great movie. I’m Irish Catholic too, so I could definitely relate to bits and pieces of the movie. You’re right the towel scene at the beach was pretty funny!
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sorry, you too 🙂
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❤️❤️
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For me it’s a mixture of pride/habit/guilt. Pride because I’ve just always been pretty self-sufficient. Since 15. Probably related to the German in me.
Habit because, well, I don’t know that I FEEL pride. This is just how it’s always been. I gave up acting to be a good husband and father. Just a few years ago we finished the long slide into bankruptcy after getting laid off. Lost everything. Still had to hold it together. I’d do something for one of the girls, they’d say thanks, and I’d sigh, “Well, I’m the Dad. It’s what I do.” Probably not the best response, but all I could think of at the time.
Guilt because I’m often quite sure God is about burned out on me. “You? AGAIN?”
Mind you, I’ve been in Memphis 4 yeas now after moving here from Toledo for the job, We’re about even again, so things are not bad now. We’re blessed with work, health, and each other.
Do you ever think it’s trying to find that boundary between what you should do for yourself and what you should leave to God? Maybe that’s part of it.
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Hi Jeffrey, Wow, what a journey. I am honored that you would share this with me. Thank you. I’m glad things are on the up and up:) I do think that’s what it is a lot. Because you’re right-we can’t be passive. We have to be active, and God HAS empowered us to do things, but I think at the same time it’s just knowing that ultimately He is in control and that He will help us along the way. I envision a kid learning how to ride a bike. The child is pedaling along, shakey, feeling so great that he’s finally riding, but what he doesn’t realize is that his dad is running alongside holding the bike steady and pushing him along. I don’t know probably uber cheesy, but that’s just my brain for ya. I just want to say, I can safely say that God does NOT think “you again”😒 If anything, He thinks, “oh yay! It’s Jeff again! 😀” at least that what I think:) haha thanks again for your readership and friendship Jeff. Sending hugs xox
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That’s a great comparison; not at all cheesy! And I know God actually likes to hear from me, but I know I wouldn’t. 🙂 His capacity is so impossible to fathom…well, I can’t help applying the only standards I really know – mine. Bad Jeff! BAD JEFF!
I was just reading and responding to a2eternity here. She’s in outpatient for bulimia, and I’ve been reading her and offering encouragement. Tonight I suggested the movie Miracle with Kurt Russell about the US Hokey team that beat the Russians decades ago. A journey of struggle, doubt, and victory. I can’t help thinking it would have to be so inspiring to ANYONE who’s up against it.
Thanks for your always thoughtful responses!
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I’ve never seen that movie…I think I may have just found my next Netflix night:) hugs Jeff xoxo
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