The Great Chase

Posted on by beautybeyondbones

I think it’s pretty evident by now, but let’s just say, I’m a sucker for a good inspirational quote.

Case in point: Just check the early days of my IG profile. I made those quote art images like they were going out of style.



But anywho.

The kids I nanny for got their school planners the other week, and me, being the school supply junkie that I am, of course wanted to flip through them. Fondle the crisp pages. Smell the freshly printed ink. I geeked out a little.

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But let’s be real: the best part of the planners is hands down…the cheesy inspirational quotes.

You know what I’m talking about – the images of a hang glider with something about “soaring;” or a weathered mountain climber boasting about perseverance.

And just for the record, I always tried to be as minimally cliched as possible with my images.


But I digress.

I flipped open his planner and the first quote I came across was this one:

“Perfection is not attainable, but if we chase perfection we can catch excellence.” – Vince Lombardi.

And when I read this, I actually inadvertently let out an audible groan of disgust. The little boy was like….”Are you okay?”

But this quote absolutely made my skin crawl. Chase perfection?! Come on, Vince, you’re better than that!

Trust me, I am all for doing the best you can and working hard and striving for excellence. But chasing perfection? That is a one-way ticket to destruction. Just ask 78 lb high school me. Because that’s what I was doing: chasing perfection.

So you can imagine how my gag reflex was triggered when I read this in an elementary school planner – right there for these impressionable little minds to soak up and internalize.

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If there is one thing I’m going to teach my future kids (God willing), it is not to chase perfection.

Here’s the thing about perfection – aside from the fact that only Jesus was perfect – Perfection communicates that everything less than that unattainable standard is “not good enough.” A failure. A let down. By encouraging our kids to chase perfection, we are literally setting them up for failure.

During my anorexia, I had in my mind’s eye the notion of what I considered perfect: the body, hair, appearance, clothing, friend group, weight, BMI, etc. Couple that with crippling “people pleasing” tendencies, and there was literally no way I was going to settle for anything less.

And I nearly died trying to achieve it. #notanexaggeration

So, what should we chase?

Let’s chase God.

I know, I can hear the eye rolls.


But it’s true.

Let’s seek after His heart. His will. His face. Let’s chase after that. Because when we do – all those other things will fall into place – all those things we exhaust ourselves with when we’re striving for perfection – the self control, the integrity, the discipline, the excellence – those things will come naturally when we put our focus on chasing after Him.

I know, it’s a weird concept to think about: chasing after God. I mean, heck…shouldn’t He be chasing after me? Well, yes, and He does. But God also wants to be pursued.
God is a jealous God. He tells us so in Exodus 34:14. “Do not worship any other god, for the Lord…is a jealous God.” And that verse always confused me: Jealousy is so negative. I didn’t get it.

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That is, until I went to inpatient. When I, for the first time, really sought after God.

I feel like my whole life was just kind of going through the motions of Christianity, taking for granted His love and presence in my life.

It wasn’t until I was at rock bottom, desperate for His help and grace, that I realized that God isn’t going to force Himself into my life. He doesn’t want to compete. And He won’t. He will allow me to pursue — to chase — whatever my heart desires. And during that dark time, I was chasing perfection. Chasing it all the way to death’s doorstep.

But during my pursuit – or chase – of perfection, God was always there, He was just waiting for me to chase Him. Because the second I took my eyes off of perfection and shifted my gaze to Him, that’s when the healing took place. And He swooped in and healed my brokenness. He had been waiting all along.

But I had to pursue Him.


So now, perhaps, you can understand the visceral disgust I felt when I read that “inspirational” quote in my little friend’s planner.

There is nothing good that comes from chasing perfection. And I will take that all the way to the bank.

Chasing perfection leads to bondage. Chasing God leads to freedom.

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SO EXCITED TO SHARE WITH YOU!!!

MY PUMPKIN ICE CREAM RECIPE!

I shared this (my fav food) with you in Monday’s video and I received so. many. requests. for the recipe.

SO – I made a Facebook/Tasty/Buzzfeed-style video (read: < 1 minute) of the recipe!

Hope you enjoy!


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And check out my new “Journaling Through Recovery” series on Patreon, where I will be transcribing my inpatient journal! eek!! The second video entry is up now!

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beautybeyondbones

BBB: Because we're all recovering from something. // For speaking/business inquiries: beautybeyondbones@yahoo.com

214 thoughts on “The Great Chase”

  2. Not having had your experience, I kinda liked the quote from ol’ Vince. But after your discussion of it, especially how kids might see it…oh my!!

    Then I started remembering how nice my recovery from bypass surgery was; eat, sleep. breathe. Repeat as needed. There’s much freedom to be had in not beating yourself into perfection! Do you best, as The Preacher says in Ecclesiastes. We should take joy in the work God has given us and focus on Him.

    Caralyn, I know you’ve been busy and likely haven’t seen my email. Julie and I will by in NYC Sunday through Tuesday, meeting up with an old friend from Australia and his wife. Seeing them Monday morning, but other than that on our own. Details in the email. We’re hoping we might see you, however briefly. Maybe a bite to eat together one evening? Let me know, OK? It would be great!

    Off to PATREON!

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    1. Hey Jeffrey! Hah yeah, I’m such a packers fan, I hated to have anything even slightly negative to say about King Vince’s words! Haha yes yes take joy in the work He’s given us. Oh gosh, I’ve been so slack with email lately! I’m out with friends right now but I promise I’ll check when I get home! Big hugs xox

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Yay, first comment! 😀 We shouldn’t chase “perfection,” but we should strive to one day become saints in Heaven and physically see God, who are all perfect – that’s the kind of perfection I chase 🙂 I’m really glad you found grace and healing by chasing God – He is always a good God! May He bless you ❤ 😀

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Today, while catching up on my WordPress reading, I happened upon the same Vince Lombardi quote. (God is awesome.) I had the same visceral response.

    Then (more awesomeness on God’s part), I received an email from a friend sending me a link to a C.S. Lewis quote. The quote? “The command Be ye perfect is not idealistic gas. Nor is it a command to do the impossible. He is going to make us into creatures that can obey that command. He said (in the Bible) that we were ‘gods’ and He is going to make good His words. If we let Him—for we can prevent Him, if we choose—He will make the feeblest and filthiest of us into a god or goddess, a dazzling, radiant, immortal creature, pulsating all through with such energy and joy and wisdom and love as we cannot now imagine, a bright stainless mirror which reflects back to God perfectly (though, of course, on a smaller scale) His own boundless power and delight and goodness. The process will be long and in parts very painful, but that is what we are in for. Nothing less. He meant what He said.” C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity (1952; Harper Collins: 2001) 205-206.

    What a contrast: Man’s pursuit of perfection versus God’s plan of perfection. God’s way is full of grace. Man’s way is full of failure.

    I hope you found this as encouraging as I did. “(A) dazzling, radiant, immortal creature, pulsating all through with such energy and joy and wisdom and love as we cannot now imagine, a bright stainless mirror which reflects back to God perfectly . . .His own boundless power and delight and goodness.”

    Liked by 4 people

  5. There’s no getting around it; I just love the way you write and present the issues and as a mom of an elementary girl: I surely do not want her to chase perfection. Last year on their wall I saw this “When you have done the best you can do – then you can always do better”. I totally gagged at that one!…

    Liked by 2 people

  10. Hi, thanks for a good laugh, the first half of this post about “chasing perfection” rings so true to me as well. So funny that it provoked a disgusting reaction in you, and how you narrated it in such an eloquent way.

    I feel like society indoctrinates a perfectionist mentality into so many of us and it’s refreshing to see someone say something which is in antithesis to this. So, hats off to the writer! Great post.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. BBB…..awesome post, thanks so much for sharing it with us!I am wondering if you could give me your email address or FB page so I could message you….I need to ask you something! Thanks again!

    Liked by 1 person

  13. I often semi-joke to the congregation I serve “Hi, I’m Jim a recovering perfectionist.” You have illustrated from your own life how destructive that can be. I again value your wisdom and seeking after God, and God alone. Something that I am doing again at this stage of my life. Seek after God period.

    Blessings my friend

    Jim

    Liked by 2 people

  17. Thank you for this post. Just wanted to share some Scriptures re: the Perfection thing (only because I love most of your posts and wouldn’t comment if I didn’t trully wanted to share what made finally sense to me after years of having the the same thoughts about perfection as you currently may have)… So here’s the scoop (as they say in Aussie lingo)…

    The Bible says we got to strive for PERFECTION (please don’t cring.. it get’s better…:).. easier to understand I mean.. I hope)…

    We’re told in Matthew 5:48 “Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect.”…

    This perfection is not in things that would lead us away from the RIGHTEOUSNESS OF GOD – but what would actually STRENGTHEN & NOURISH our spirit to strive to BE LIKE JESUS in our characters.. and GOD uses our weaknesses actually (not our PERFECTION) to become our strengths (2 Cor. 12:9) which are RECKONED as PERFECT thanks to a thing called our FAITH (that comes from an educated conscience – read Romans 10:17 – it comes from studying the BIble (not just reading it as a story book.. and PRAYER).

    Is anyone perfect? NO! Of course not! That is why we read that Abraham’s FAITH was RECKONED to him as RIGHTEOUS (righteousness is the level of perfection that GOD can only deal with) – Romans 4:3 – “For what saith the scripture? Abraham believed God, and it was counted unto him for righteousness.”

    So one can BE RECKONED AS PERFECT – in INTENTION ONLY – ONLY thanks to JESUS CHRIST – when we believe in HIM being the ransom sacrifice to free ALL mankind – every single human – from the curse of the death sentence that came upon eveyr single human when Adam sinned – Jesus became the CORRESPONDING PRICE – freeing all from the prison house of death you see…

    So Abraham was not perfect, even as others of our race are imperfect,—”There is none righteous, no, not one.” (Rom. 3:10.) But we are told that God so highly esteemed Abraham’s faith that he counted it as making up for his natural blemishes and imperfections. “It was counted [reckoned] to him for righteousness.” (Rom. 4:3.) He had faith in what God had told him, and, as James (2:22) points out, he manifested his faith by his general conduct. We of the Gospel age (this 6000 years of permission of evil that is soon to end, before the perfect 7th thousand Millennial “day”) are also justified by faith—righteousness is reckoned to us through the exercise of FAITH.

    Hope this helps to realize that GOD’s only standard whom he deals with is PEERFECT INTENTION NOW RECKONED as RIGHTEOUS (perfect) thanks ONLY due to Jesus COVERING us – being our Advocate (not mediator) once we accept him as our personal Redeemer and wish to follow in his footsteps, taking up our cross and giving up our wills – counting it dead – and wishing only to have that will of GOD – that only wants what IS PURE and PERFECT not pertaining to the fleshly things.. but that pureness and perfection that develops in the flesh, but is of the NEW MIND in Christ, thus the development of that New Creation in one – the longing to be like Jesus and see him as he is – and that longing for a body which will know no sin it it when faithful unto death – as it shall be, GOD willing, changed into an imperishable and incorruptible one when resurrected (1 Cor. 15:42)

    Finally here are some inspiring words by our Apostle Paul from Philippians 3:12: –
    about pressing toward the Goal:
    “11so that I may somehow attain to the resurrection from the dead. 12Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been perfected, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. 13Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have laid hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead,…”

    GOD BLESS YOU dear friend and keep up the great posts that can lead many to Christ 🙂 xxx

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Another inspiring post…I am still working on my faith and relationship with God but it is getting stronger each day. That quote made me sick when I read it, I honestly had to reread it multiple times. I am a teacher and if that was in one of my student’s journals I would have been appalled. I would never want any child to ever chase perfectionism because there is NO such thing. I rather them be challenged and learn from their failures. Thank you for sharing!!

    Liked by 2 people

  23. BBB! I am so glad that you felt like wretching at that quote! Chasing after perfection always ends in disappointment. And I am so glad that you have also been learning those two lessons God wants us learning: 1. I am not and were never meant to be enough. 2. Because of Jesus I will always have enough. Because of Jesus we don’t have to worry about being enough, doing enough, or becoming enough. Because of Jesus, you already have all that. So the chasing we do is done because of love, not because we need to get it or prove we were worthy of it. That is a chase I can get behind. =)

    Liked by 2 people

  25. Love this! it is so true! Go pursue your dreams…God has them all. He’s waiting for you and I to finally let go of what we think is perfect and follow his lead to our true dreams. He knows our heart better than we will ever know it ourselves. He know what soothes our souls. What’s so great about our God? It is the way he loves our imperfect souls! Thank you for the beauty in your words. I am blessed.

    Liked by 2 people

  27. I’ve been trying to come up with a response to this post that doesn’t come across as critical, condescending, or correcting, and I hope that I may share my perspective without doing any of those things. Firstly, I do not wish to presuppose anything regarding you, your life, your struggles, or your spiritual walk with the Lord. That’s not my place, or intention. I do believe that the perfection that you write about is the world or society’s take on perfection, and thus fully agree with your premise! Like so many other words that were once exclusively used to describe God and His workings, society has taken them and perverted them. We should chase after God, though He never changes, never moves, never casts us away. We choose to sin and turn away, but God calls us back to reconcile the relationship. He did this in the most beautiful and supreme way possible, Jesus Christ. Christ, as I believe and understand, lived a sinless life, a perfect life. Faultless and untainted. In doing so, God gave us the ultimate sacrifice to atone for the sin that is present in our lives from the beginning. Thus, Jesus is the ultimate example of true perfection. We ought to strive to be more like Jesus (which you affirm)! Where the world/society calls us to compare ourselves to their definition of perfection, God calls us to look beyond that toward Christ. Christ should be the litmus test for our lives as we strive to be more like Him. Though, because of sin, I will never be perfect in this world until either I am in Heaven or Christ returns. So, yes, we should not chase the world’s understanding of perfection because it is perverted, but should instead look beyond this world and look toward the Cross on which Christ died a sinners death after living sinlessly, the true perfection. We will never measure up to Christ in this regard while we walk this earth, but I (we, those who have faith in Christ’s life, death, and resurrection) will strive toward being more like Christ in full assurance that I (we) will one day be made whole in Heaven or upon Christ’s return.

    I hope that I have not overstepped my bounds, and do wish to reassert that I completely agree with all that you have had to share in this post! I appreciate the honesty and sincerity in which you discuss this topic in regards to your perspective. Continue to ponder the things of the Lord, continue to chase after the things of God, continue to strive to be more like Christ! And as Proverbs 3:13-14 states, “Blessed is the one who finds wisdom, and the one who gets understanding, for the gain from her is better than gain from silver and her profit better than gold.”

    Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ,
    T.

    Liked by 2 people

  31. The first part , I agree completely. The second part , Aaah … I don’t know. Am not devoted yet, I do not believe.
    However , I wannna say , you can make a connection with your writing. May be someday , I will see what you see in HIM 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  32. God wasn’t running, he was watching and when you let go of your false god, Perfection, and turned around he was there to embrace you as you fell into his arms.

    Liked by 1 person

  33. “Ring the bells that still can ring. Forget your perfect offering. There is a crack in everything. That’s how the light gets in.” (Leonard Cohen)

    ….

    😉

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  34. Speaking of IG, have you ever seen that stamp going around the internet that says, “I put my grandmother on speed dial – I call that ‘instagram’ ” ;D

    But I digress.

    This runs close to something else I’ve been thinking about, that is, the emphasis in the church corporate and otherwise, for people to pursue religious perfection–holiness, righteousness. Someone else might have already thought to mention what Jesus said about that–‘seek first his kingdom and his righteousness and all these things will be added to you’. Frankly it makes me angry when I hear or see someone say, “well you better be careful–you don’t want to give yourself too much grace and freedom…” etc, ‘greasy grace’, fear-mongering on the straight-and-narrow, church culture is so set on the pursuit of perfection and it makes me mad because it takes so much away from the real deal, knowing the love of Jesus, being secure in Jesus’ love for me.. there’s no room for fear or pursuit of perfection in that. Truly, Jesus didn’t dig ditches on the straight-and-narrow; the church did that–and to her shame.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha grandma on speed dial?! No! I haven’t seen that! But I will for sure keep my eyes peeled! Thanks for this reflection, Carson. You’re right- Jesus’ love for us is definitely secure. Hope you’re having s great week. Hugs and love xox

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  36. The truth is we can’t be perfect as you said. But we can always be a better version o ourselves. Kelp getting better as we keep growing, knowing Christ more and doing out part cause we have the ability to; given by God.

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  37. Thank you thank you! We should really chase God because he is perfection. Amen sistahhhh!! Thanks for sharing. Sometimes we all need a little reminder, I’ve been all sort type of things lately so thank you for sharing this ❤️! Hugs and love babe

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  39. Hello. With the love i see you get on your blog, i presume you have received more than enough awards. But this recognition award is just to let you know that I love your blog and i enjoy following your blog and reading your words. You don’t have to accept it.
    Thank you

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hey there! Yes-inpatient refers to when I went to inpatient treatment for anorexia. It was back when I was 18. I shared about it back in the early days of my blog:) hope you’re having a great day! Hugs and love xox

      Like

  43. Great post!
    We always see perfection as the end goal, to lead the perfect life but it leaves you empty and feeling not good enough because it is unattainable. It also denotes trying to do things ourself without God and that honestly never ends well.
    You are totally right that we need to seek God and chase after him!

    “Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.”-Matthew‬ ‭6:33

    Liked by 1 person

  46. BBB, thanks for this post. Indeed, that is my Chase for life and all is falling in place, even consolation I find in abundance as I greatly chase God. This perfection thing almost got me nuts too especially with my cleaning obsession, people pleaser personality, school and etc. The other day, I asked my son to clean their bathroom and I clearly think he did his best. I came in to supervise and before I knew it I was saying ‘it is not perfect but it is not so bad’. I immediately felt bad passing on that kind of crap message to my son— I don’t want to sniff that word perfect again. I let him go but couldn’t resist the urge to clean the places I think he missed out… It’s a constant battle— when I decided I had had enough with my body mass of 115 kgs – FOOD WAS SUCH A CONSOLATION FOR ME IN A MISERABLE MARRIAGE, I tuned on perfect and got down to 70 and my mum cried and begged and even threatened. Now am at 77 and well about to go try losing some again, but don’t aim for any crap perfect…

    Liked by 1 person

  48. Great post! I began to follow you because I have a teenage daughter who has body image issues, food issues and self-image issues. Your insights help me to understand what place she is coming from, and with that shared insight, hopefully I can help her. So, thank you. Thank you for helping me help my beautiful daughter.

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