The Exploitation By “To The Bone”

Posted on by beautybeyondbones

Before tonight’s zinger..which…I’m fired up tonight, so get ready….

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But first, I have some incredibly exciting news to share.

I just found out that BeautyBeyondBones was ranked in the Top 25 Eating Disorder Recovery Websites on the World Wide Web!

 

So thank you with all my heart for taking the time out of your busy lives to read my words.

OK…now onto tonight’s main event.

As you know, I was utterly disgusted at Netflix for their irresponsible and harmful depiction of teenage suicide in “13 Reasons Why.”

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You’d think they’d have learned their lesson after the backlash by the public, and several tragic copy-cat teenage suicides post-airing. But no.

In fact, they’ve done it again….

And this time…it’s about anorexia.

The movie is called “To The Bone” and it is being released on July 14.

They just premiered the trailer.

I watched it.

I nearly threw up I was so repulsed.

*sigh* Where do I even begin.

Let me just start out by saying that I am 10 years strong into my recovery from a life threatening case of anorexia. I starved myself down to 78 pounds. Went to inpatient treatment. Relapsed. Exercised destructively. And osteopenia, infertility, and some serious other issues later, I am finally healthy – mind, body and spirit.

And even though I am 10 years strong, I was triggered by this trailer.

Seeing Lily Collins, the actress who plays the main character – a 20-year-old young woman with anorexia – in such a severely emaciated state made me absolutely shudder.

The hollowed out and gaunt face, the skeletal frame — it made my blood boil.

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You see, the actress, Lily Collins, battled an eating disorder herself. And so for her to have to get down to that dangerously low weight, while in real life, she is in recovery herself, it pains me to think of the detrimental harm that did to her own personal recovery.

But seeing those images poses a tremendous risk for those girls (and boys) who are struggling with an eating disorder, or who are in recovery. It was just wayyy too realistic. Just too far.

It’s hard for a person who has never struggled with an eating disorder to understand what “triggering” really means to someone with/in recovery from ED.

And yeah, seeing her skeletal, emaciated frame is triggering, but it’s also other things too — like seeing her deny food. Depictions of purging or exercise. Depictions of obsession over food and calories. “Triggering” images and language make a person miss their eating disorder, point blank. Triggers make a person “flirt” with ED, and seriously jeopardize their recovery…best way to put it.

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The whole trailer just romanticized anorexia. From the joking — yes, joking — about her ability to know every food item’s caloric amount, to her measuring the circumference of her arms with her thumb and middle finger, hell – to her “thigh gap,” or to the “glamour shots” of her sharp bones protruding from her back, to the handsome therapist in her inpatient treatment facility who takes the kids outside in the rain so that they “remember how to live.”

I’m sorry. But when I was so severely depleted, I couldn’t even go to bed with wet hair after a shower because of the calories I’d expend from the loss of heat in my head while I slept. Going out in the rain is not something that you are physically able to do as someone with anorexia – your body simply cannot regulate your body temperature and keep it warm. Had a therapist/doctor taken kids out in the rain…he would have lost his job. And his medical license.

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To be fair, I haven’t seen the movie, but from the 2 minute trailer, I can tell you that I don’t want to.

“To The Bone’s” recklessly irresponsible depiction of anorexia made me want to scream.

And what’s more is that in addition to Lily Collins, the writer and director also suffered from an eating disorder.

THEY SHOULD KNOW BETTER

How dare they put out material that is going to trigger those who watch it.

“But we’re trying to start a conversation about an important topic…”

Bull. Shit.

I’m sorry, but someone had to say it.

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I’m sick and tired of Hollywood glorifying issues that real people suffer from, just to push the envelope and be edgy, and cause a buzz for their movie.

Not cool.

You want to really help raise awareness and open up a dialogue about anorexia? Then how about you not romanticize it and joke about it on an *dramatic-comedy.*

Why don’t you ask someone who actually lived through the starvation, isolation, calorie obsession, tortuous exercise, broken relationships, shattered future, inpatient treatment — what she thinks about your enshrined depiction of a disease – a mental illness – that nearly killed her? Why don’t you ask me?

Because I’ll tell you: I’m not laughing.

I’m disgusted.

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You’re “sincere” efforts to open a dialogue — are already having detrimental effect: Photos of a gaunt and skeletal Lily Collins from the trailer are already being passed around the internet as “thinspo,” – aka: “thin-spiration” — photos that mentally sick girls use to salivate over as they deny themselves food in order to starve down to nothing.

Way to go. Way to raise “awareness.”

Netflix, you should be ashamed of the despicable representation of mental illness here recently with 13 Reasons Why and To the Bone.

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You should realize the power of influence, especially on young, impressionable teenage minds.

There is a responsibility that comes with platform, and you are promoting shows that propagate harmful and negligent material.

“To the Bone” went way too far.

It is a desperate cry for “artistic attention” that romanticizes the nature of anorexia, while simultaneously negating the dangers of the disease, creating a seriously destructive narrative.

I want no part of that.

None.

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beautybeyondbones

BBB: Because we're all recovering from something. // For speaking/business inquiries: beautybeyondbones@yahoo.com

434 thoughts on “The Exploitation By “To The Bone””

  1. Hey, I admire your passion to educate on, and warn people about ED and its detriments. I have learnt more about Anorexia a nd EDs from your blog than from any other source. I agree with you, it is unscrupulous to use the influence of our platform to glorify and ‘promote’ detrimental and life-threatening lifestyles. Keep it up.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. That’s not good, for you to be triggered.
    May you be strengthened. It’s powerful that you can speak to others about it (being triggered) –

    Congratulations on your award…

    Yes, leave that one behind…

    Like

  3. If netflix wanted to create awareness it would have been a factual my story documentary. The means do not justify the ends. Thanks for being courageous and speaking up.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Same to you! Oh by the way, its not exactly your way, but I did setup my new blog similar! 🙂 But I’m a man of my word and gave you a small shoutout!

        Like

  5. I saw the trailer of “To the bone”, and honestly I was disgusted. It triggered my ED SO MUCH even if I’m in recovery for several years now. I don’t understand how Netflix can use mental illnesses like this just because they know it attracts a lot of viewers. The thing is that people watching those movies will have a completely wrong view about how it is to have a mental illness. No, anorexia is not a beautiful skinny girl dancing in the rain or joking about her problems as you said. It’s depression, wanting to die slowly, it’s crying and shouting… Thank you for this post!!

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    1. Thanks so much for sharing this Sophie. I’m sorry that you were triggered too. Yeah- it’s really sad the narratives they’re presenting on Netflix. Amen!! It’s not a beautiful skinny girl dancing in the rain!!!!!! Oh my gosh SO TRUE. thanks for sharing your perspective. Hugs and love xox

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Thank you for your reply, it means a lot to me!! Yeah it’s really sad but I at least hope it will be their last production like this…

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  6. I personally have not seen the trailer and I am sure right now I don’t want too. I have been having hard days with being mad that I am eating unhealthy and I want to go on a “diet” but we all know where “diets” can lead. I am 100% sure I will have to watch it as soon as released as my pre teen daughter will watch it and I need to make sure she is educated and knows exactly my past. oxoxoxoxo

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  14. Thank goodness I wasn’t the only one. I first saw the ad a few days ago while watching something on youtube. I sat there thinking you have to be joking. I have to be hallucinating what I’m seeing. Honestly, I’m in relapse right now, and it hurt SO much to see people laughing at something that has caused me so much pain. It’s not funny. I’ve never found it funny. It was also really triggering. As I watched her do the things that I do on a daily basis, I felt all of the urges I normally have one hundred fold. Why aren’t you doing more of that? Why is she doing a better job than you? I’ve been in so much pain from a commercial, and I can’t believe anyone who suffered as I have would put another person through that. It’s just unthinkable.

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    1. Thanks so much Annie. Yeah, it is so awful. Insensitive to say the least. I’m so sorry you’re walking a challenging road right now. Know that I believe in you and that you can crush ED. I Know – simply unthinkable. Sending big big hugs and love xox

      Like

  15. Wow! Thankyou for such a powerful insight into the world of anorexia. I totally agree regarding the media dramatising serious disorders just for money. Where has all the love gone 💜

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  17. I’m so proud of you and your blog!

    ironic I saw this post today right after watching the trailer and crying. I wasn’t diagnosed anorexic, but I definitely had most of the tendencies. This sickened me to watch…

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  18. Another wonderfully brave post. Obviously, God is using your life-experience to brighten many lives as evidenced by your most recent Award. I have only known you to share from the heart and for that I am certain your readers will trust your judgment to not support viewing this movie. Hugs n’ blessings to you for your continued bravery!

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    1. Thanks Dawn. 🙂 you’re so nice to say that. Yeah, my heart just breaks to think of the young impressionable girls who will watch this and have it so negatively affect them. Thanks for your continued encouragement and support. You are a blessing to me! Have a great Sunday! Hugs and love xox

      Liked by 1 person

  20. Maybe you already answered this in the comments somewhere, but if I dug through there I’d never finish…;)

    Honest question on your thoughts: what would proper awareness-raising look like?

    Given the potency of triggers and the tendency of young people to copycat and echo what they see on television, would you say that it precludes ANY visual representation of anorexia? Or do you simply propose different directorial and cinematographic styles to do so? Or do your complaints simply lie in the falling-short of its accuracy?

    If you felt a different medium was in order, what would you suggest?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for this question, Brandon. I really appreciate it. Actually, it’s funny you asked because I’m going to be releasing a book here soon about just that. It’s a delicate balance between telling the truth, and doing so in a sensitive way that aims to help and prevent instead of glorify/romanticize. Hope that makes sense! Hugs and love xox

      Liked by 1 person

    2. I was wondering this too. The unfortunate truth is that if Netflix just made a factual, dry representation of an issue then you could be fairly certain that almost nobody would watch it. While many people in the comments have said that they feel this movie would trigger them it would be fair to point out that it’s probably not being made for people who have anorexia. I sympathize with people recovering from their disease and also wonder is there actually anything positive that could come from a show like this regardless of the truths of the entertainment industry? There are very few issues in the world that have been solved by a dramatic comedy or even a well designed documentary. TV is for turning your brain off and overdosing on Ruffles potato chips, not critical thinking. It always makes me cringe when critics call a television show “brave” or “inspiring”. Sure it was inspiring for the thirty minutes after it ended but then the world went back to fat shaming people on Facebook.

      Liked by 1 person

  21. First congratulations on the award. Thank you for standing up for all those not physically able to at this time. Your honesty and strength is an inspiration. God Bless! Milly

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    1. Hi Robert! Thanks so much for your reflection. Yeah me too. As an actress myself, it just breaks my heart to think of what Collins had to put herself through for the role. Detrimental to her recovery, to say the least. Thanks for stopping by. Hugs and love xox

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Mitch! Oh my gosh SO great meeting you!! It was seriously the highlight of my day! Break a leg! (Ps how wild would it be if we both were in that film! Fingers crossed!) have a great night! Hugs and love xox

      Liked by 1 person

  25. Congratulations on the best 25 eating disorder sites! I agree about glamorizing things. I have 2 thoughts. Suicide is not a viable option. And there are some people who really do want other people to kill themselves or at least don’t care if they do. Keep up the excellent work. You are an inspiration.

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  28. I have read that “13 Reasons Why” and it was moved me to anger more than pity.
    Congratulation, by the way, for your very beautiful blog.

    Like

  29. Oh wow. And oh no. I didn’t know about To the Bone. Makes me wonder if Netflix has a string of movies coming out about different types of mental illness. Sure, it’s great to talk about mental health disorders and raise awareness, but not like this (and 13 Reasons Why). Not to glorify these issues. So glad you shared this and your point of view. And…. a HUGE congrats on being one of the Top 25!! That’s AMAZING, yay!!!!! I’m so happy for you!! xx

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  32. I thank God that He is blessing you with your blog.. the true beauty is that someone can read it in complete privacy and your story can be the lifeline that they desperately need and have no idea how to find. I You are absolutely right about Hollywood and it is so sad how many actors have died during roles or shortly after by becoming “to close” to their character, which I tend to think open spiritual doors to same problems , especially when they are portraying a real person, and Hollywood does glamorous “coping mechanisms” and plays them for all their worth and everything from drug use, sex, and “flirting with disaster” lifestyles are made to look like the normal response when life gets rough and it is heart sickening to “indoctrinate” millions, maybe billions of new victims with the “in and outs” of eating disorders (which I think they have for years) because when you think about it, once someone has seen, just like you said” exactly how it is done, that influence is there for a lifetime, just as characters on drugs are shown with spoons and straws and it actually teaches people how to perform every act that the character is plagued by. Heart sickening and so deceptive.

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    1. Gosh thank you so much. Yeah it really makes me sad. Making entertainment out of the suffering and pain of others is never okay. Heart sickening is definitely the right term. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Hugs and love xox

      Liked by 1 person

  34. There’s always this part of the entertainment industry that seeks to glamorize or minimize the realness of harmful things. I was a cutter back in high school. There was nothing pretty about it or what I felt. And yet, “Wristcutters: A Love Story” comes out. For a while it was trendy to have a character with Asperger’s Syndrome on sitcoms or dramas. But each of us is an individual and people who watch those shows interact inappropriately sometimes. UGH! Kudos to you for seeing it and calling it out. Also, I am happy we are following each other’s blogs. You create a feeling of kinship with anyone who is struggling with their own issues. THANKS!

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    1. Thanks for sharing your story, Holly. Gosh, you’re so right – capitalizing on the pain and suffering of another person is just awful. You’re right – these things are not storyline potentials- they are issues that real people have to deal with. Thanks for stopping by. Hugs and love xox

      Like

  35. I really appreciate you taking the time and liking one of my first blog posts. I just started my blog last week and I’m still trying to figure out how I can reach people with it. After seeing that you liked my post I decided to come over to your page and check it out. It looks very well done and something you’re passionate about and excel at. I have a sister who struggled with orthorexia for a few years, and after reading a few of your posts I can relate to a lot of what you’ve said through seeing it happen. I’m elated by the fact that people like you exist and hopefully reach so many people who are trying to fight their way back to a normal life. I hope to learn from your page and look forward to reading more from you!

    Like

  36. Caralyn, when is your next post coming up? You’re the only one I follow and suddenly it feels like a long wait. 😀

    Like

  37. I had been interested in this film, but having seen the trailer I too am very concerned. By casting a very beautiful actress and ‘curing’ her in 90 minutes, it is presenting a completely unrealistic picture of eating disorders. Hollywood never presents the truth about the unrelenting pain and misery of mental illness. It is also worrying that Lily Collins is appearing nude in Shape magazine – once more an unrealistic image is being promoted as glamour and success.

    Like

  39. Great job calling those shows out, because I wholeheartedly agree. I wasn’t aware of “To The Bone,” yet, but regardless, I know the “edgy-ness” they’re going for will never win out. It can’t because we already know what does. Thanks for putting the truth spin on these shows 🙂

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  40. Shoot…I never would have known about this if not for this blog, but on a side note, triggering can happen to anyone.
    If you’re like me and have had fear and anxiety problems, any thing that is scary enough can cause you to be triggered to go back to that way of thinking.
    It sucks about these two series and I think they should have liability for the damage they cause, but any show can potentially be damaging. A person who struggles with lust can’t watch a sexually charged show without being triggered.
    My point being, there’s a lot of irresponsibility both from the entertainment industry and from the people who watch its products.
    I’m glad you’re talking about the actual consequences, since you know about it, and people will take you seriously. But I think a lot of these trigger-happy shows go under the radar because they are more culturally accepted things. Like horror fiction. We need to take all of it seriously and be considerate of everyone’s weaknesses.
    That was what I got from this.

    Like

    1. Thanks so much for your thoughtful response. Yeah you’re so right – respect and love and seeking understanding is key rather than exploiting and pushing stereotypes. Thanks for your kind words! Hugs and love xox

      Like

  41. Hi BBB,

    Preach it! I hope you will reach those on the edge or know someone who does.

    Thanks,

    Gary

    On Thu, Jun 22, 2017 at 4:03 PM BeautyBeyondBones wrote:

    > beautybeyondbones posted: “Before tonight’s zinger..which…I’m fired up > tonight, so get ready…. But first, I have some incredibly exciting news > to share. I just found out that BeautyBeyondBones was ranked in the Top 25 > Eating Disorder Recovery Websites on the World Wide Web!” >

    Like

  43. This raises the question of how media (TV, streaming, movies…) can depict various illness without exploiting those who experience them, turning them into sentimentality or romanticized images, etc. -Oscar

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  44. This post is so deeply moving and heartfelt I am saddened that you or anyone else would be triggered by watching To The Bone. I am not convinced though that shows like this should not be aired. We all have the choice to view or not.

    There are any more factors that need to be considered yet we humans want to assign a rationale. We want answers! Sometimes we grab onto one reason … any reason … no matter how misguided or how flawed because having a reason is better than the alternative of not knowing. And somehow doing so projects the cause aka blame away from US. In my case, away from ME.

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  45. Hey! I found your blog as I am currently awaiting referral to an eating disorder clinic (yay…!) and spending my summer stuck at home while my friends are off interrailing (double yay..) I love your writing style and, having watched the trailer for this new series am worried too.
    I have just started my own blog exploring being a teenager with an ed and all things dating, life and everything in between so if you could check that out and maybe give it a share as well as offer any tips on blogging that would be SO appreciated.
    I am so in awe of what you do, you’re an inspiration.
    Thank you and all the best,
    Amy 🙂 xx

    Like

    1. Thanks so much for sharing your story, Amy. I’m so happy to hear that you’re on the journey to recovery! I will definitely keep you in my thoughts and prayers as you reclaim your life! I believe in you! Big hugs xox

      Liked by 1 person

  46. Wow. I agree 13 Ways is an absolute disaster. This new film reminds me of the Tracey Gold film, which my family used as some kind of terrifying ‘intervention’. I was 92 lbs, in reneal failure and we couldn’t afford inpatient. I’ll try to avoid this film.

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  48. These netflix shows have no idea the damage they are doing. I just watched a netflix show on multiple personalities and a therapist got his air time in! He said that there is no scientific proof that memories can be suppressed! And THAT triggered me. How dare they put that out there. One more thing I have to fight against is people who believe the propaganda and I have to fight against this stigma. PTSD isn’t something some therapists can just weigh in on ON a documentary. And I agree with your other netflix reviews. It is not ok. This is not ok. It is damaging.
    If everyone. Just everyone. Could see past this shell. My life is not about my body. Not about my hair cut. Not about whether I wore make up today or not or cute sandals. When they focus on those things, it just makes the fight against anorexia even harder. Focus on how I feel. What my heart speaks, what my souls says.
    Anyone who has visited my blog knows that I have made friends with a baby owl. She seemed to choose me. So for 4 months I go outside every day. She flies over to a branch, and she screeches, and I talk and that is how it goes for a few hours. We look into each others eyes. And feel. My husband walked with me today in my wheelchair and he watched the owl fly over me along the way and land in trees around me. He was in awe of her as I am every day. I receive more from an OWL in real connection than human beings. The owl does not care what I look like. If only humans could be the same.

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  49. Excellent post. I am totally in agreement with your position. I felt the same way about 13 Reasons and I refused to watch it. It skirts the issue that kids that are already flirting with the idea of suicide and just might go over the edge and do it after seeing that movie. The same with anorexia. Just my thoughts.

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  50. wow, what a tongue lashing; or should I say print lashing? I am so sick of the poison put out by hollywood, (no I won’t capitalize hollywood spellchecker) I haven’t been to see a movie in about 5 years.
    Hey girl, just dropped in to thank you for reading my latest post and I’m glad i did. this is a dynamite piece you wrote.

    Like

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