Where are the Young People?

Posted on by beautybeyondbones

Since being back in NYC, for the last week and a half, I have gone to a different church every day for Daily Mass.

And as much as I wish I could say I was 100% going for faith and spiritual purposes, I would be lying if I didn’t say that 62% of my reason for attendance was because I am…#HusbandHunting.

Some women lunch down on Wall Street in the hopes of meeting Mr. Right. Some women attend daily mass. Po-ta-to, Po-tah-to.

Don’t judge me, but I go full hair and makeup in the hopes of fortuitously bumping into the future Mr. BBB. Not that I don’t trust God’s plan and timing, but let’s just say…I’m giving Him a little help. Trying to speed up the process, if you will.

But it’s actually been a really interesting exercise to go to all these different churches in all these different neighborhood around the city.

I’ve been in, of course, St. Patrick’s cathedral, where I was dodging tourists taking photos on their iPads.

 

I’ve been in sleepy chapels with only 3 other people. I’ve been in Spanish speaking masses where they sell homemade empanadas outside on the sidewalk afterwards. Even one where the song books were written in Chinese! (I wish I would have taken a picture!) Uptown. Downtown. Midtown. Brooklyn.

And no matter where I went, there was one, glaringly obvious similarity…

There were no young people.

Nope. Not a single under-30 to be found. With the exception of one couple I saw that were  clearly in a relationship, all the other people in the pews were either geriatric, or recipients of AARP magazine. (And no offense to either of these wonderful groups of people. I love ya, but this girl’s lookin’ for a husband, here!)

But after the end of the second week of, again, being the youngest in the room by an easy 20 years, I was feeling very discouraged. I sat there in the pew, looking up at the crucifix and seeing Jesus literally hanging there, it made me really sad to think that here’s this incredible gift that He gave us, and nobody flippin’ cares.

The pews were empty.

And listen, I’m not some holier-than-thou exemption either. Sitting there in my high heels and lipstick, my attendance clearly had ulterior motives.

But the emptiness was definitely alarming.

And I get it, just because you don’t go to church doesn’t mean you don’t love Jesus. That’s not my point here either. But it just saddened me to see church attendance literally on life support.

Is this it? Have we finally reached that moment where Christianity has become obsolete, minus a handful of out-of-touch “bible bangers” who don’t know the difference between Kanye and Kenya?

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Have we finally reached the moment where Christianity has become irrelevant?

The answer: Faith is needed now more than ever.

Yeah, sure, it may be more interesting to sit around on our iPhones and read about the latest sexual abuse allegation on Twitter. Or watch Instagram Stories from your friends, or scrutinize Kylie Jenner’s snapchats and whether or not she has a baby bump.

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Sure. Those things are definitely technological luxuries of the time, but the fact is, we need to pray for this broken world.

We need to pray for those empty seats.

We need to ask Jesus to help those who are hurting and to move in the hearts of those who could be filling those empty pews.

But here’s the truth of the matter: we need to be Jesus’ hands and feet here on Earth.

And that doesn’t necessarily mean going out and evangelizing on the street corners and handing out your church’s business cards at the water cooler. Although, that would be great if you did.

It starts in the way you treat people.

Are we living with compassion and empathy? Are we creating a welcoming environment for those who may be at church for the first time?

Are we making faith attractive, or is it more of an exclusive club with lofty prerequisites and impossible standards.

If we want those seats to be full, we need to make it a place people want to be.

I’ll be going to mass here again in a little while. And tonight, I’ll be praying for those empty seats. For the conversion of hearts. For the hurting in our world.

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May I be a source of hope in this dark world. May I make His gospel seem inviting.

And may I find a freakin’ husband.

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BBB: Because we're all recovering from something. // For speaking/business inquiries: beautybeyondbones@yahoo.com

387 thoughts on “Where are the Young People?”

  1. Sooo honest question from someone who is also in your position (in terms of dating) but from the Protestant circle… Are you only looking for someone who is Roman Catholic? Sorry if it is too personal of a question, but honestly curious. As an under 30 Protestant I’ve been open to finding someone who is either Protestant or Catholic.

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    1. Thank you Casey. I️ appreciate your question. I️ think as long as they love Jesus, we could make it work 🙂 Hugs x

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  2. Great post, and I see this a lot from young single women in my church. We are a non denom and have lots of young faces. And while it’s good to seek community and friends, it can be tricky to have an “agenda”. I did that once and rather than focusing on other arenas that make a relationship work, I focused on our faith. In the end, the marriage didn’t work. I believe it was because I had a “spot to fill” and didn’t pay enough attention to the man. Faith is important – but it is not the only thing. What other interests do you have? Perhaps visiting galleries or parks or bookstores would allow some interaction with your future fellow? Love your blog and your writing. Enjoy the Big Apple!

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    1. Thank you so much Sherri for sharing your story. I’m sorry your marriage didn’t work. But That’s a really great point. And great ideas!! Thanks for stopping by. Hugs and love xox

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  4. Very humorous. I think you’ve finally hit your stride! BBB is what it ought to be. I walked into the Panera-like place they call Great Harvest here (I think the Mormons run it because it’s always closed on Sundays.), and there were no freakin regular-sized cinnamon rolls. I mean, Cum on! But before that, and I mean that with total honesty, there was, like, a hurricane blowin in that there store. Customer: I JUST WANT A PIECE OF BREAD! Cashier: I’m sorry, I can’t do that. Customer: WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIIIIIIIIIIIIIIS TOWN!!! I HAVE NO LUNCH! I JUST WANT A PIECE OF BREAD THICK ENOUGH FOR A SANDWICH! Cashier: How about this one? NO! I AM A DIEBETIC! Cashier: How about this one? Customer: I’M HEADED TO WORK WHERE I’M GOING TO SSSSSEEEEERRRRVEEEEE PEOPLE, AND I’M ALREADY LATE! I NEED A THICK ENOUGH PIECE OF BREAD FOR A SANDWICH! … I sit down…I don’t think I’ll ever get the cinnamon roll I want. Wait for the melee to end. Or not. They didn’t have my cinnamon roll, anyway. Cashier: Can I get you a piece of bread? Nah…I head to Denny’s to ogle the cute girl instead. She understands my handicap.

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  7. Great post! I love that you go to daily Mass. I met my husband through a church activity as did a few of my friends. When I got involved in parish life I met so many new people who introduced me to even more people. My future husband and I were on the same leadership committee. I will keep your prayer intentions close to my heart. Blessings!

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    1. Oh thank you so much! That’s so awesome – i appreciate you sharing your story. It gives me great hope! 🙂 hehe thanks for your prayers! Hugs and love xox

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    1. Yeah that’s a good point. I guess for me it’s just an added bonus 🙂 Worshiping God and potentially meeting the man God wants me to marry 🙂 hehe hugs xox

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  9. Hey BBB + BBB followers!

    I’d have to say there is an international movement where church attendants especially for the younger generation have been decreasing. I have to agree with Ms. BBB here, there are minimal young people attendees when you go to church.
    And yes I encourage all of you to be a continuous light to whichever part of the world you are!
    #SharetheLoveofJesus

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  10. This article by FOX News italks about Oswald Chambers’ humble and unassumingly non-judgmental demeanor in presenting the Gospel, and I think correlates well with your post.
    https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=7&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0ahUKEwif97b7iNHXAhVX2GMKHZJkBBAQqOcBCEgwBg&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.foxnews.com%2Fopinion%2F2017%2F11%2F19%2Fwhy-oswald-chambers-and-his-incredible-my-utmost-for-his-highest-is-still-guide-for-today.html&usg=AOvVaw1NzBf2yxiNsuGyn-VY-dUj

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  11. Hahahaha who hasn’t been husband shopping at church? But when you look for nice Christian guys, they are no where to be found. Maybe they are hiding? Right? 😂😂
    I guess I just need to learn the value of patience…
    Hang in there 😂😂 and hey if you can’t find a husband at mass at least you can learn more about Jesus…
    ❤️❤️
    Love
    Izzy

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    1. Hey Izzy, thanks for this encouragement. Haha i know, right?! It’s the best place to meet Mr. Right! Oh yes – patience for me too. Hugs and love xox

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  12. I found my wife at church. Actually, doing outreach with our church. We were working among the poor and ignored children of drug-dealers, trying to share the hope of Christ.

    So… sitting in church? Maybe you’ll bump into somebody handsome and dashing.

    But going out and “being” the church… at least you’ll get to see somebody’s heart. And it’s that “heart beauty” that you really want to know and share your life with. I knew my wife’s heart well before I asked her to marry me.

    Peace,
    Dave

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  14. So. Loved this post. And yes the church is in shifting times. Times when what church looks like and how it is lived out has to change. Young 20s-30s I’ve spoken with attend many churches or are in a small group serving people. They are done with the institution but love Jesus or they are off searching and want none of it and need our prayers all the more. I am with you and praying alongside of you.

    Now to the husband- with us 30k+ readership you’ve got people who can pray with you. And so I’m just wondering who are we praying for. You are not just looking for “male” generic church going 20 something. But what’s his heart like? Hiw talk is he? Does he dance? Does he sing? does he like music? Does he pray – how frequently? What’s he said no to in order to follow Jesus? How does he use his money? How does this man you’re looking for use his mind? What’s his sexual history? what’s the impact on him by porn? Is he a virgin? And if so what are his reasons for purity? And his far does that purity go for him – to what he looks at? What he thinks? What he believes? And what’s his heart like in relationship to Jesus? What’s his use of free time? Does he serve the homeless? does he laugh and have sunshine in his heart? Does he have a ready smile? How has he used his hands? What’s his experience with suffering? Describe him and we will pray for him and you as you meet… grace upon Grace. Your brother Brian

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    1. Hi Brian, thank you so much for this beautiful and thoughtful response. Yes. Let’s pray for those empty pews. And wow thank you for your kind words and support in praying for my future husband. Those are some really thought provoking questions. All i want is a man after Jesus’s heart. 🙂 thanks for stopping by. Hugs and love xox.

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      1. I hear you. I’ll be praying for the two of you to meet. And may he embody a man who cherishes you, rejoices in your success, encourages you to become all that Jesus intends you to be. May he be your champion. Your solid witness in life. May he leave you notes just because and get you flowers because he wanted to bless the street vender and you. May he have a heart that gives and gives. May he have boundaries so as not to confuse himself with you. And may his identity be securely in Christ so he can help you keep yours there too. Blessings!

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      2. Thank you so much. Seriously. It means the world. This has filled me with so much hope and peace tonight 🙂 xox

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  15. You have liked my posts more than anybody, so I do as told and come look at yours. You have a wonderfully engaging style. I have a personal curiosity question: Is the beautifulbeyondbones you in the blue dress the same woman as the one in the masthead picture? You don’t look the same but the odds are that it would be the same. Either way, considering your success with the blog and with the way you present yourself in your posts, there’s no way you’re going to have any trouble landing a husband. My guess is that the one turning anybody down would be you. Forget about only 62% chance! My second curious question: I don’t see your name anywhere. My wife Mary and I just celebrated our 28th anniversary Nov. 12. We both attended the same theological college but hardly crossed paths. But we both stayed in the same worldwide fellowship and 15 years after graduation God brought us together at the same Sabbath service in Glendora, Calif. and on the second date we committed to marriage. I wanted to share this with you enough to come all the way down here beneath this mountain of adoring comments. I can’t believe you answer them all with such attention and love. I would be interested in reading your blogging tips but don’t use any of the platforms listed. You obviously know some good tips to have over 30,000 followers.

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    1. Thank you so much! I’m so glad you stopped by 🙂 im sorry but I’m afraid i don’t know the two pictures you are referring to! I’m trying to wrap my head around a blue dress photo and i don’t think i own a blue dress! Eek! My photos are all up on instagram, if you’d like to see who i am. And my name is Caralyn 🙂 Thank you for sharing your story of how you and your wife met. What a beautiful story. I appreciate it. Hugs to you xox

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  16. “And as much as I wish I could say I was 100% going for faith and spiritual purposes, I would be lying if I didn’t say that 62% of my reason for attendance was because I am…#HusbandHunting.”

    No offense but I find your honesty refreshing and had to laugh a little – I think you answered your question in the below quote:

    “Yeah, sure, it may be more interesting to sit around on our iPhones and read about the latest sexual abuse allegation on Twitter. Or watch Instagram Stories from your friends, or scrutinize Kylie Jenner’s snapchats and whether or not she has a baby bump.”

    Polytheism is the way of it in the modern world all wrapped up in a blanket of technology and bling – the new gods are FB, twitter and the like. “Celebrities” who every utterance is taken as gospel and “reality shows” that are anything but.
    Christianity in my opinion is being destroyed from within by scandals, televangelists, so called “evangelicals”, and the promotion of such things as a “prosperity doctrine – not to mention politicians and others who employ it to garner votes.
    Neither a nation nor a people can survive in any meaningful manner lacking a moral rudder, and moral need not imply a religious tenet or doctrine rather a principled approach as we wend our way through the years given to us whether a person believes in a creator or not.
    As indigenous nations our experience with what I refer to as organized religion has been anything but inspirational, and yet
    we too believe in a Creator.

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    1. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts! You’re definitely right about needing a moral rudder. And thank you for sharing your perspective on that. It really offers some powerful food for thought. Hugs and love xox

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  17. I think part of the reason church attendance is dwindling is because (with the exception of the Mormon Church), you’re pretty much ignored when you visit a church–it’s up to you, the guest, to reach out, not the parishioners to make you feel welcome.

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    1. Thanks so much Sarah, for sharing your thoughts. Yeah churches need to extend a welcome that’s for sure!! Hugs and love xox

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  18. Thanks for stopping by my blog! I really enjoyed reading what you wrote here. One of my clients went on Match but did it with a particular strategy. She decided that she would meet for coffee dates only (daytime) and she would give every man at least one second date, no matter how awkward it may have been, just to see whether she was really getting who that person was or not. After doing that for a while, I don’t recall how many months, she met the man she’s married to now and they have a child, and life is really good! She even ended up becoming a life coach. So you just never know!

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  19. I will tell you, as a somewhat young, married Catholic woman (who obviously is not a potential husband for you – sorry! ;)), daily Mass is perpetually on my to-do list but I don’t quite get there simply because I have to get my day started. Not because I’m not religious (I am) or because I’m taking time for myself (I’m not), but because I either have to get on a plane, or start my commute, or just plain get to work.

    So my thing is – I don’t know what type of person has time for daily Mass on a regular basis! I understand you were traveling, and that makes sense, but … I wish I knew what to tell you! It makes sense in theory to find the type of husband you’re looking for at daily Mass, except for the fact that a man who is going to be a good provider (the way I provide for my family) isn’t likely to have time for daily Mass!

    I don’t know – maybe catholicmatch.com? Avemariasingles.com? (are they even still around?)

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    1. That is such a great point!! Thanks for this. I think the after-work ting adult group is rlly best bet 🙂 thanks for stopping by and for this great perspective! Hugs and love xox

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  20. All I can say is I live in Rochester, NY and we have a few powerful young adult groups, but Rochester is more hick town, haha.

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  21. Hey Caralyn. Thanks for liking my blog and great to see your candidness! 🙂 I don’t want to come across as judgmental in any way, just helpful. I grew up as an atheist in communist Romania but God met me and changed my world around. (Now I’m thinking that maybe I should put my testimony in a blog along with maybe what was like to be a Christian under the communist regime, most in the “home of the entitled” don’t know). Anyway, I became protestant and the Christian college I attended was a ministry of a Baptist church but was interdenominational and I even had orthodox class mates (and good friends). I know that there are many Christians who love Jesus in Catholic churches. I’ve also been following (and commending the ministry) of https://www.lifesitenews.com/ which is a pro-life Catholic site. However, it is my experience, again, I emphasize, I don’t claim to be the absolute truth but only my experience… that, overall there seem to be more nominal Christians in Catholic churches. There are certainly many of those in protestant churches but, again, it seems to me it seems to be more in Catholic churches. Young people who were brought up in nominal Christian families are more likely to leave the church which, I think, explains at least part of the problem. I think it’s not as much a problem of churches lacking young people but maybe a problem with the churches you are looking at. I attend a non-denominational church http://www.harvestbiblechapel.org/ which has a whole lot of young people that love Jesus. Every month there are “God at work” videos of people in the Church how God changed their lives, helped them through difficulties, overcome addictions, etc–people to whom God is real. I’m sure that there are churches like that in NY as well (we have some worship leaders that visit us occasionally from NY and I’m sure they attend churches like ours). So, I’m suggesting that you may need to expand your Church list to visit. What matters is not a label we carry, but how our heart is in relation to God. “For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart.” I pray that God will guide you and bless you in your search.

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    1. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts on this. Lots of powerful things to think about. And wow what a story you have! I would certainly love to read it 🙂 Hugs to you xox

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  22. Well, I live in Sant Cugat del Valles, close to Barcelona in Spain. And the churches here are full of young people and young families (and middle-aged families as well). And I mean full, standing room only. Every Sunday mass is choc-a-block full, and sometimes like a zoo with all of the kids and noise. Even the monestry in the centre of Sant Cugat on Sunday evening 1900 mass (last chance in case you were too busy the rest of the weekend) is full, we are talking about probably 800 people. Last Christmas Eve, the priests ran out of bread!

    Admittedly we live in a bubble of Catholicism and this location is not normal in Spain or almost anywhere else in the world. And when we go to other towns in Spain mass is equally as sad as you describe in your blog. But you create your own bubble. And point of being Christian is to get out there and spread the work – create your bubble. Just an idea.

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    1. oh wow that’s amazing! and holy cow — Spain!! how incredible. i’ve never been but perhaps it’s time I change that! thanks for sharing your experience. Hugs and love xox

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  23. I have noticed in your last few blogs you have been discussing that you are looking for a husband. I don’t know if you are joking or serious. But I want to encourage you to just be faithful to God and ask him the desires of your heart for your husband and he will provide. No need for you to take God’s job, he has everything under control, and I believe your husband is coming soon!

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    1. Thank you Shay. I am definitely 100% serious. I really appreciate your encouragement and reassurance. You’re so right – God’s got it all under control. I just need to practice some patience. Hugs and love xox

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  24. Hey again – I am with you on this one, but I have a different take on it. Catholicism is most definitely on life support – archaic concepts, highly ceremonial, and formality are pretty much things of the past. I am, and have been, a regular church goer most my life, and I can tell you there is a huge shift from formal to informal and very modern. Coffee, WiFi, louder worship versus organs and hymnals. The last three churches I have attended I would guess have an average age of 35 to 45. Still not in that 20 something crowd, however, what I do see are pockets of the 20 something’s that are believers and followers but the numbers are fewer. My opinion on this – most did not have faith following parents, so they are seekers themselves, and most importantly – they do not know themselves well enough to know what they want or how to achieve it. I am generalizing here and do not say that is true of all of course, but that is definitely in the ball park.

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    1. Thank you so much for sharing your perspective on this! Yeah your 20s are definitely a time for self discovery. Hugs and love xox

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  25. I attend an interdenominational church and there are people of people at all ages. Originally, I thought that was strange out here in Arizona, land of migrants. Now, plenty of which were born here. Good luck and happy holidays!

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    1. Thanks so much Darell. That’s awesome that your church is so vibrant! rock on!! thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox

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  26. While I am a Reformed Baptist, I met my wife in church, while teaching Sunday School. I was not even think of marriage but God had other ideas. I do not think it cynical nor helping God to by what you are doing but stepping out in Faith that HE will provide. I can think of no better place than a house of God to meet a spouse.

    While my knowledge of current trends in Catholic Church are limited, I would imagine that the daily mass is still attended for the most part but an older (my generation 60+ crowd). I might suggest therefore you find the church that have group studies and get togethers for your age group and check that out.

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    1. Thanks for this thoughtful response and for sharing your story! What a. Beautiful love story you and your wife share! Thanks for stopping by and for those great suggestions. Hugs and love xox

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  27. Hi Caralyn, thanks for stopping by and liking my blog post 🙂 I empathize with your plight. I was not a believer when I was your age, and made a lot of disastrous relationship choices. Now at 50+ I am blissfully single and loving it. I have Jesus, good Christian friends and family and a quiet contented life (most of the time :).

    I don’t know if you’re open to other denominations but there is a church (c3manhatten.org is their NYC website). I have a friend who attends C3 in Toronto and it is a vibrant and very young congregation. Each person lives out their faith and encourage each other to grow and be all that God created them to be.

    God luck in being where God wants you to be when He brings your chosen husband into your life!

    Blessings, Vera

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    1. Hi Vera, thank you so much for your kind words. And thank you for sharing your story! I’m so glad you’ve got a great thing going. God is good. And thanks for that info! Sounds like an awesome church! Hugs and love xox

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  28. HA! 😀 I love your honesty. My friend used to call Bible School, Bridal School. And wow, what a sad observation about younger generations. I suspect that there may be more younger people in more non-denominational churches. ??? Or maybe they are all at home catching live church online. 😦

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  29. Hi BBB, nice to see you pass by again. Marx your bag (Karl, not Groucho). As for going to churches and finding yourself in the bottom age quartile. Yes, even I’ve experienced that. Yet the world needs the message of Jesus even more. Churches aren’t very counter cultural though. That was a subtext on my Marx review. Society is sick. Karl had some ideas, some of which are still relevant, but he was no sweetie, and subsequent followers were real horrors. Anyhow. Finding the right Christian fellowship will do you better long term good than stumbling into Mr BBB alongside the empanadas. All the best from Blighty

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  30. In your rather self-serving exercise to go to all these different churches in all these different neighborhood around the city, with all these different religions, or even perspectives based into what you were born into, in a world-wide church, did you ever consider the story of poor Sarah and her husband, Abraham. Or, if you ever looked more closely, her half-brother, Abram, before the name change. And wasn’t that why they had to change their names? Yes, he who sacrificed his home only at the age of 70, while giving up all of his friends. And then, trying to speed up the process, in the hopes of providing a son, Sarah along with her handmaid worked out a plan to have a son. And oy vey, there was this damage done in trying to speed up the process! Take your time…or take a night class as Fordham. And it is just as easy to marry a rich one as a poor one. As a writer who looks at the setting of time and place, I would worry more about speeding up the place — the time of game either at Yankee Stadium or some Catholic Masses is a growing problem. So drop some heavily-sugared food off at the local fire stations, a traditional place of good young men with a sense of teamwork, and mostly Catholic.

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    1. Thanks for this response. That’s a great suggestion about bringing cookies to the firemen. Those men work hard and protect the community. They deserve some thanks. Hugs and love xox

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  31. You are so right – no young people in the traditional churches. I think Christian denominations need to rethink liturgy if they want to bring young people in. There’s a community church here that has 30 meditation, 30 minutes contemporary Christian music, 30 minutes scripture study, sharing led by the minister. I want to check it out. They also offer Zumba, and service projects … I want to check it out and see how it is. Not because I’m young – I’m not- but because traditional church does not touch my soul any more.

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    1. Thanks Mona, for sharing your thoughts on this. Wow that sounds like a great church! I hope you enjoy the experience. Thanks for stopping by 🙂 Hugs and love xox

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  32. My husband and I are just under 2 weeks away from moving across country, to Cape Town, to join the pastoral team of a church in a small suburb. And I found this post encouraging! Thank you for sharing. My husband and I have been speaking extensively about how we can help bring about positive change in Fish Hoek, Cape Town. Thanks for sharing this post – it has encouraged me to strive harder to be Jesus hands and feet on the ground! Megan xxx

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    1. Oh wow that’s so awesome! I’ll definitely keep you and your husband and your ministry in my prayers, Megan! Thanks for stopping by. Hugs and love xox

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    1. Oh that’s so amazing Safina!! Sounds like you’ve found an awesome church. I love their music so much 🙂 hugs xox

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  35. What a lot of advice you have received! Mine would be to look for “A Higher Order Marriage” which is what I think your heart wants rather than pursuing a husband even though that may be what your head and hormones are urging you toward.

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  36. Have you heard of Pastor Tommy Nelson? He preaches at Denton Bible Church In Denton Texas. He has done a sermon series on the book Song of Solomon. If you’ve read Song of Solomon then you know that it makes very little sense and leaves most with questions. Pastor Nelson goes through the whole book and explains all of the references being made and what the sayings mean. By doing that, the book turns from a mess of confusion into the most beautiful poem on what true, pure and genuine love looks like. I’d encourage you or anyone else looking to either find or strengthen love to listen to his podcast series. Here is the link to the podcast on itunes, completely free! https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/denton-bible-church-love-song-the-song-of-solomon/id148822180?mt=2

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    1. Hi Travis, thank you for passing that along! Sounds like a great podcast. I’ve never really read S.O.S, but sounds like I need to! thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox

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  37. Ok first you are hope enough: young and spiritually concerned. Second the fact that i had to scroll miles down to write this, proves you’re impacting people. Third Sunday Mass is probably a much better time to find…um, anyone. Good luck to you. 😉

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    1. Oh Paula, what a kind thing to say. thank you so much. That’s a really great point! thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox

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  39. Oh, girl. Right there with you in so many ways. Going to different Bible Studies hoping to bump into him. Praying for my future husband. And for myself. AND. More than YES. We need faith now more than ever. We need to pray. We need to shine His light and do His will. I try to pray for all these things when I am drinking my coffee, before the sunrise. As in Psalms.
    Thank you for sharing your stories. Hey, know you are not alone! I just felt the need to say that. I will pray for you and your husband and you pray for me and mine!

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    1. Hey again friend! You’re so right – we need to pray and be His light to the world. Thanks for the encouragement and prayers. know that you are in mine too! Hugs and love xox

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  40. I’d say “give us a visit here at WFPC” – we have a richly diverse demographic, with a lot of young adults… I know, North Carolina is a little out of the way for your commute!
    But in answer to the “where are the young people” question, I believe it’s all about authenticity. There is no gimmick, no “program,” no fad that can possibly reach people with any more reliability than an authentic witness to the invitational love of God through Jesus. Great preaching doesn’t hurt, but – even though Rebekah is an amazing preacher – that’s not why people come. They come (young and middle aged and old) because it’s real, and it’s the simple Gospel.
    Peace – and more – Derek

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  41. This article beautifully captures the issue that the Church must confront first and foremost! God continue to bless you! I hope you find that freakin’ husband! I can’t really help you directly, but I will pray for you. Let’s both pray for the empty seats. I can tell you that you are looking in the right place. You can go to may places that are filled with many potential horrible matches for you. God’s plan may seem slow as it unfolds, but in the end it is so worth it.

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    1. Thank you so much friend. Yes I’ll join you in that prayer! Haha thank you 🙂 you’re right – so worth it. Hugs and love xox

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  42. I agree with your observation about young people not being in church. We need to pray to fill the piews.

    I am not sure a weekday mass is the best place to husband hunt. Sunday would be best. Considering the general lack of enthusiasm among under 30s for the Catholic church, also try a Protestant church. One that is considered an evangelical church would be best because they tend to have young members who take their faith very seriously.

    Examples would be: Christian Missionary Alliance (CMA), Four Square Gospel Church, Calvary Chapel, Baptist and others that sponsor activities for your age group.

    Best of luck for a good husband who is a strong Christian.

    Reynold

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    1. Thanks Reynold. So true. We need to pray to fill the pews. Yeah that’s a great point. Great great point. Hugs and love xox

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  43. Thanks for the reminder to pray for our churches! But take heart. A few months ago, I went to a concert with young kiddos (well, early 20s–that’s young to me!). The two guys in the band sang a lot of heart-rending songs about life, faith and what it looks like to walk with God. There are believers out there, young and old. But it does make my heart sad to see how many people have walked away, even when I understand some of their reasons. And one last thing, don’t lower your standards for a godly man, even when it seems like they are few and/or nonexistent. It’s not worth getting married if you won’t be in it with someone who will pursue God alongside you. Best of luck, friend!

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  45. Hey, B3, Thanks for following my sermons, by the way. When I read this, I had two thoughts. My first thought was, “Does she know about Redeemer Presbyterian Church in NYC?” I have no idea where it, or you, are, geographically speaking. But if you like my sermons, you’d probably like Tim Keller’s. Plus, his church has a reputation of having a large number of young singles.

    My second thought was “Please be careful!” I do understand the struggle of singleness and loneliness, though I haven’t had that struggle for a long while now. But I can go back and read my journals. It seemed like I wrote constantly about this girl, or that, and just generally was pining for a wife, for several years. Then my journals took a turn, and it seemed like what I was really focused on was Jesus, and becoming a better disciple. Less than a year after that focus change, I met my lovely bride. We recently celebrated our 25th!

    In marriage, Jesus needs to be first, even before your spouse. I think it helps you prepare if he is first, even before you meet your spouse. Finally, to bring it all together, Tim Keller, pastor of Redeemer Presbyterian in NYC, has an awesome book marriage that is also very appropriate for singles.

    Grace, peace and Joy to you, in Jesus<

    Tom

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    1. Thank you so much for this thoughtful response. That’s really great advice: to shift focus. 🙌🏼 and I’ll def have to look into that church. Thanks for passing it along 🙂 happy new year! Hugs and love xox

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  46. Just stopping by to thank you for stopping by on my blog! Really appreciate the support coming from a beautiful sister in Christ like you! I also want to let you know that I truly admire your efforts to be a steadfast catholic in this generation—you are the young person that the young church (including me!) needs to look up to. i look forward to following you on this journey! Many prayers headed your way!

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  47. I was over thirty before I meet my wife to be, I went to a Salvation Army hall, ready to give up the idea of ever finding anyone and knelt at the mercy seat and gave my life to Jesus to take control
    After that Carol (wife to be) chatted my up, it seems she was looking for a man to marry, I wrote about this story on my blog
    So Don’t give up just go where God’s Spirit takes you

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  48. No judgment here sweet sister. I just hope one day soon youll get to know the joy of being hunted and deeper appreciate Jesus design for your womanhood as I also had to learn. Have you heard of Michelle Hammond? She and her books are encouraging.

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    1. Thank you so much for you kind words. I haven’t! I’ll have to check her out. Thanks for the recco. Hugs and love xox

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  49. Where to start. I will keep this short. I currently work a job that makes it hard for me to go attend church regularly. When I do I am rolling on 3 hrs of sleep. That’s my excuse. Not a good one I confess. I agree though. We need church. You can definitely be a Christian without going to church, but we need the fellowship. We need to see other people our age sharing the same faith together. We live in a world that hides behind screens. We all need to put down the screens and fellowship face to face. What better way to do that then by going to church with our fellow generation. Sigh. excuses excuses. So many, but none are good. Thank you for this post. Good luck with Mr BBB!

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    1. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts on this. You have a beautiful heart 🙂 Hugs and love xox

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  50. You make a really observation, and one not restricted to Catholic congregations. There is a faith crisis in our country.

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