So I’ve been sick with the flu this week.
I haven’t left my bed in over 24 hours. My hair has that post-sleep permafix; I’m bundled up in three layers – all of which need a good washing after last night’s fever. There’s a mountain of tissues on my bedside table. And to top it all off, I’m mouth breathing. At least I’m wearing deodorant.
Needless to say, I’m feeling pretty attractive right now.
But let me tell you – after a day cooped up in bed in a studio apartment, not only are you stir crazy, but you’ll inevitably find yourself in the deep abyss of the internet.
And unfortunately, this time didn’t result in a semi-fascinating conspiracy theory on the Denver airport, or an adorable cat video that makes me question my marriage eligibility status.
No. In fact, I’m writing this at 1:24 am, after having spent the last 2 hours combing through over three thousand comments, many of which were hate….about….me.
Yep. I have officially become the target of online bullying.
I don’t know if you remember, but back around Thanksgiving, I partnered up with a beauty brand. I made a cute little one-minute video about their magnet mask. Perhaps you gave it a watch.
Innocent enough. I had fun making it, although to be honest, it was pretty terrifying putting my face on camera without a speck of makeup or concealer on. I can tell you about my virginity, my faith, my political views, fears, hurts, history of anorexia — no problem. But ask me to go on camera without undereye concealer? — I’m petrified! Talk about vulnerable. But I did it. I genuinely loved the product (I still use it) and was happy with how the vid turned out.
Little did I know, but that “little video” has been viewed over 8 MILLION TIMES on Facebook and Instagram. The company has been using it as their viral Ad. What an honor!
And well, let’s just say that with that exposure, my “anonymous” blog life and “in-person” life have been colliding. Many of my friends/acquaintances/teachers/coaches from high school have been commenting on the video, asking if it is me, not knowing that I have this blog.
And it was only tonight, after I was tagged in the video by a friend, that I discovered the reach this video has gotten.
And also…the hate.
I don’t know why, but for whatever reason, my fever-induced brain thought it was a good idea to read through all 3,000+ comments, and sear into my brain all the mean things random people were saying about me. Maybe it’s the masochist in me.
But wow. People are brutal. And cruel! My goodness, you’d think some of these people were raised by pit bulls!
People called me stupid. A “crazy white girl.” Said I was twelve years old. Attacked the way I spoke. The way I looked. Accusing me of plastic surgery or being sick with different skin diseases. They were hurling insults like cannonballs off The Black Pearl.
And all from the safety of anonymity behind a screen.
Let me highlight some of the real gems.
But my all-time favorites:
Classy. Real classy.
(And for the record – the “bruising” under my eyes is a side effect of the medication I have to take for my autoimmune disease. It makes my dark circles more pronounced).
I have never been bullied before. That is a blessing that I know is not true for everyone, which makes me very sad.
The only experience I’ve had was a remark made on the playground when I was in second grade. I was told I was “hindering ‘Sally.’” Little eight year old me held onto that truth and stuffed it away, only to have it manifest itself in my anorexia, where I believed to my core that I was an unloveable burden. So yeah, I get it. Words hurt. And can scar you.
But wow. After reading through all these personal attacks, I cannot imagine what it must be like to have to live with this feeling day in and day out. Where going to school is filled with dread and anxiety, rather than joyful anticipation.
But processing these remarks as a young adult is a much different experience than what I can imagine it must be like as a teenager.
Because I’m not going to lie, I’m feeling pretty hurt right now. But I’ve learned, in these moments to cling to God, let Him carry me and heal my pains.
Which prompted me to roll over, excavate my laptop from beneath the mountain of tissues, and write this post:
Dear Strong Young Girl:
I don’t envy you. The world in which you grow up can be hostile, feeling like one giant competition. You’ve had to become an open book: sharing, snapping, tweeting, ‘gramming, filtering your life away – you’re desperate for a moment of privacy to discover the authentic you. There is more to life than followers and your worth is more than likes on photo. You have a heart. A spirit. A beauty that cannot be captured from the selfie feature of the latest iPhone.
Boys will make you feel unimportant. Girls will make you feel small. Teachers can make you feel inadequate. And parents, well – they can make you feel exasperated, but give them a break – they’re trying.
Life is a constant push and pull of authentic reality and fabricated reality.
You don’t need to compare yourself to Kylie or Kim. At the end of the day, she’s just a 37 woman who posts naked selfies on the internet. You can aspire to more than that, sweet girl.
You have worth. You have value. You have passions and talents and dreams and abilities that can take you wherever you want to go. I love you for that. And the world is better with you in it.
Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
Believe in you. Believe in the difference you can make to this world – even if just one person.
Compassion, generosity, faith, honesty, humility, empathy, kindness – those don’t get retweets or followers. But those are what make you rise to the top. They’re what really matter in this life.
Because one day soon, high school will end. And you’ll graduate college. And every single person will stumble out, blinking into the light of the “real world” only to realize that truthfully, we were all to one degree or another, a “jerk” in high school.
And those that don’t realize that…well, they’ll have a hard realization in their future.
You, my dear: cherish this time. Put your phone away, hang out with your friends and enjoy being in the moment. Laugh. Dance. Make silly home movies about killer turtles that come to attack your town. Don’t let the boys tear apart your friendships. Or make you cry. Or say or snap or do anything that you don’t want to do.
Keep your eyes on the Father – the One who wants only the best for His precious daughter, who He loves so much.
This is your life. Your time to shine. Because that’s what people with beautiful hearts do: they light up a room – just like you do.
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496 responses to “True Life: Online Bullying”
Getting sick is the worst! I’ve been battling a cold all week, so my bed and I have gotten well acquainted 😁 Definitely praying for your health, and keep on shining your light despite what the trolls online might think. Thanks for sharing, as always!
it really is, thanks Luke. I appreciate your prayers. Hugs and love xox
I am horrified by the online comments you have received. You look totally normal in the photo of you with the mask you don’t have bruises or jaundice you look great. I think it is a nasty side effect of achieving some kind of celebrity – which you have with the 4 million views – that people attack you. This especially happens to women by other women. Why are they so mean? Where is sisterhood?! Thanks for your support for my blog! xx
thank you Caroline. Yeah the comments were a bit hard to shake…not gonna lie. thank you for your kind words. yeah, where is the sisterhood indeed! Hugs and love xox
There are some complete and utter w****** in this world! They think they are so clever and funny. They don’t take the time to get to know the amazing and so beautiful person that you are and the person who i care so much for and inspires me to keep battling x. Sorry for the curse those messages made me quite mad at first, but so thankful to have you in my life ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Hey Benny! Thanks for your kindness. Not to worry. I’m grateful for you in my life as well! Hugs and love xox
Wow – some people are truly horrible. And I bet half of them are all vocal and righteous about feminism and female empowerment, but perfectly happy to tear you down themselves. Awful.
You’re a bigger person than I am when it comes to anonymising their identities – I’d have outed every one of their sorry backsides 😀
I hope the positive comments far outweighed the stupid negatives and you’re not put off doing this again?
Hey Charlie, thank you for this. It seriously means a lot. I definitely won’t let it stop me from doing it again 🙂 thanks for the encouragement . big big hugs xx
oh – and get well soon!
haha thanks 🙂
Hope you feel better soon!
thank you so much! Hugs and love xox
Your quite welcome, much love and peace!!
xoxoxo 🙂 🙂 🙂 xoxo
I so agree with C.S. Lewis’s observation!
Good and evil when they attain their full stature are retrospective. That is why, at the end of all things, the damned will say we were always in Hell, and the blessed we have never lived anywhere but in heaven.
Collected Letters, to Dom Bede Griffiths, 25 May 1944
Wow what a powerful quote. thank you so much for sharing that. big hugs x
YW! It is from this post (shameless plug 🙂
https://markjerde.wordpress.com/2017/09/10/even-if-there-was-no-eternal-life/
🙂 xoxoxo
I feel like most people who do online bullying (or any bullying at all) hate their own lives. And it’s pathetic b/c they’re hiding behind a keyboard with cheeto fingers and probably not doing anything productive with their lives other trolling and making themselves somehow feel better,by putting others down. I wouldn’t let it get to you… you’re beautiful, got a good head on your shoulders with Jesus in your life, and are successful in what you’re doing. Keep on doing you! 🙂
hey friend, thank you so much for this beautiful encouragement. it seriously means so much. i appreciate you! big hugs xo
I think social media has finally allowed us to confirm that human nature is pretty bad. About the only thing you can do is unplug from those comments and move on. They are so totally off base compared to who you really are as a human being and a child of God. But consider this: every single one of those people obviously need to get a life.
hey James. I think you’re pretty spot on about that. yes – moving on! thanks for your kindness. Hugs and love xox
First, I’m sorry that you’re not feeling well. Second, people can be cruel. That’s just an unfortunate fact. But the thing is nothing they have said about you matters. I think you’re awesome, those who follow you think you’re awesome, most importantly, God thinks you’re awesome…all of the other noise comes from those who are nonessential. Keep doing what you’re doing…because you’re awesome!
Hey Sean, thank you so much for your kind words and encouragement. Amen – -and what God thinks is, in the end, all that matters 🙂 big big hugs x
Big hugs back to you 😊
xoxooxox
The level of dehumanization that happens online is horrible. So you were sick already and then this. That probably felt like punches to the gut every time.
You’re a courageous human, and I appreciate your vulnerability in coming on and talking about it. Also, I appreciate the fact that you’re rightfully upset about it but still managed to stay soft and kind in your response. That speaks volumes to your character.
Hey there Thalea! What a beautiful name! thank you so much for your kind words and encouragement. it seriously means so much. sending massive hugs to you! xox
#1. You are fantastic and a positive force for good
#2. Great video
#3. Please don’t allow those comments darken your door
#4. See comment #1
haha see comment #1, that made me chuckle. seriously though, thank you Scott. you rock. big hugs x
People can be so mean when hidden behind a keyboard, I hope you feel better soon
Hi Cate-Jayne! thank you for your kind words. Yes – anonymity breeds that type of behavior, unfortunately. big hugs to you x
So glad WordPress doesn’t appear to be that kind of environment 💕
Same here!!! xoxoxoxoxo
Had this over a week ago. Not fun. Sleep through it and stay off the Internet! As to the remarks of others, as I say all the time, only you can make you “feel” — others can’t make you feel. Your feelings are yours alone. No matter how cruel people can be. As you know, God loves you unconditionally. As simple as it sounds, that’s all you need. And a little chicken soup!
oh no, i’m sorry you were sick too! thank you so much for this kindness and beautiful reminder. Means a lot. big hugs x
Hello sweet face!! You are a total star!!! I loved the video and you are a natural. I’ve been following your blog for a while and I love your work and now I am blessed to see your face live and hear your voice speaking. You are like Oprah Winfrey, everything you touch turns to gold. Just be you and go for the gusto! Don’t ever sweat the small stuff!!
Hi Jeanie! oh, you are too kind. thank you for these incredibly affirming words. I am truly touched. Big big big hugs to you friend xox
Oh my goodness, 3.5m.
Oh no, you read those comments
…
And a cold… sending love –
thanks David, yeah – all those comments and all that time on my hands — not a good combination! haha Hugs and love xox
Glad you are able to rise above those who put others down.
Get well soon. Jeff
thank you so much jeff, that means a lot. Hugs and love xox
It is truly sad that people expose their own weakness by belittling others. Start feeling better, try it, it works lol hugs God Rules!
Hey friend. thank you so much for this kind response. Yes He does!!! Hugs and love xox
Best not to look too closely at the comments. They are saying them in passing without the thought of it being a real person behind them, all foolish, shallow comments. Just remember its a great video or it wouldn’t be going viral! I guess that’s the cost of fame…just be grateful you aren’t a movie star or royalty how horrible that must be!
yeah, i definitely learned that one the hard way. no kidding!! thanks for your kind words! Hugs and love xox
Trolls, really bad at trolling. Seriously though I wouldn’t worry about what these people are saying because obviously their words are worthless and sadly they are very small minded.
Sticks and stones.. you should know that you are not worth the criticism from these people.
Anyway feel better, being sick is not fun.
Hey friend! thank you so much for your kind words. You’re right – gotta let those comments just roll off like beads of water. thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox
So sorry you were subjected to other’s insecurities. Makes me wonder what I’m opening myself up to with my own blog (and future book, hopefully). You keep doing you and spreading your positivity. God’s light shines through the darkness.
thank you friend. i really appreciate your kind words. and good luck on the book!!! 🙂 Hugs and love xox
First of all, you’re adorable and strong. Obviously those trolls have nothing better to do because their lives are empty and they feel empowered to try to bring someone as low as they are. They have nothing. They waste the time and life God gave them on trying to fit in with the mean people who would turn on them in a second. I’m so sorry you experienced such nastiness.
You took the high road and you’ll be blessed. Brave of you to share. I appreciate your transparency. 👏
oh my gosh, Tamara, you are so kind. thank you so much! I really appreciate your encouraging words. big big hugs xox
By the end of your post I was in tears. Why people feel the need to bully is beyond me. I am so sorry you had to read those rude, unnecessary comments. Thank you for opening up on this important topic! You are wonderful!!
Because they are ignorant and it makes them feel better about themselves when they are putting someone down. Cowards, too. They hide behind computers.
oh friend, thank you so much. i’m so glad it resonated with you. sending so much love and hugs xo
Beautiful letter. All young girls should have the opportunity to read it
thank you so much. I’m touched by your words. big hugs x
I didn’t know you had to touch your face to know if it feels soft or not. I guess I still can learn a thing or two. 😉
Hi Maria, hahah thanks 🙂 yeah — what they didn’t see was that I actually did touch my face before I said it — i just had to edit it out to make it exactly sixty seconds hahaha — last time I’m going to be doing THAT!! hahaha big hugs xo
Bullies are people with issues which makes them feel worthless and it manifests in how they treat others. It’s a reflection of how they veiw themselves. Sad really but it’s no excuse. There is never a good excuse for bullying. They are cowards. It’s doubly so when they hide behind the keyboard. They’d never say it to your face. Botox? More like jealous of your beauty and enthusiasm. They wish they were as beautiful as you are and had skin like yours. Your positive outlook, your gentle way of speaking and explaining things, your strength and courage, your determination, they are all qualities we all wish we had. Some of us find it sooner than others. Some never do. You are a survivor! It took guts for you to put yourself out there like that. I admire that. You go, girl! Keep your eyes fixed on Jesus xx
Hey Allison, thank you so much for this kind and thoughtful response. you’re so right – there is no excuse for bullying. thank you for such beautiful encouragement. yes- gotta keep my eyes on Him! Hugs and love xox
Oh, Care! Those people don’t know your story. They don’t know the road you’ve traveled. They have no idea of the waves you’ve been challenged with and rode out with such grace and bravery. Don’t let their senseless, thoughtless words get into your beautiful, strong spirit. Tell the devil not today-because YOU dear are a child of the Most High! Please don’t let ANY person or rude comment dull that light of yours! Sending you a big hug from the frozen tundra of MN! (And praying for your recovery <3 !)
Hey friend! (Also, I love that you call me Care! That’s what everyone in my day-to-day life calls me!! 🙂 ) Thank you for this beautiful response. i am so touched by your incredibly kind words. Yes! NOT TODAY!!!! Sending massive hugs! thanks for the prayers and stay warm!!! xox
Sending hugs. It seems you need them.
thank you 🙂 i love hugs so much ! sending some right back atcha! xx
I am so sorry you had to read such rude comments, you don’t deserve that. I pray for those people who assume things about you without actually knowing you. You are such a vibrant individual! Don’t pay too much attention to what they are saying, you keep doing what you are doing hun. I will be praying for you 🙂 (Also keep in mind Proverbs 9:8!)
xoxo
Hey Martha, thank you so much for your kind words and prayer. you’re right – just gotta brush them off! I’m definitely going to look up that verse tonight before i fall asleep! Thank goodness for the bible app on our phones! hahaha but seriously, thank you for your encouragement . Hugs and love xox
I love reading your blog… people are truly so spiteful, especially behind a screen. Hurt people really do hurt people. You are beautiful, inside AND out!!! God will always have your back…and your true fans! ❤️❤️❤️
Hi Tamara, oh thank you so much for your kind words. i am truly touched. big big hugs xo
get well soon. and never get read comments on viral videos 🙂
seriously, what’s dumb is that those people would never say that stuff to your face. because that would be hurting a human being, but hurting an image on a screen that’s just fine.
thank you friend. I appreciate it so much. i definitely learned my lesson! stay away from the comments section! that’s so true — great point. big hugs xo
Oh!!
I hate being sick.
Hope you are feeling better now.
thanks friend! me too! Hugs and love xox
Rev PA Bennett says there’s four things we have to do on Earth. Learn to love ourselves. Learn to love others. Learn to love Nature. Learn to love God.
Depending on the time of the week I fail at one or all of these.
We’ve been writing to each other a few years in these comments. I close a website and, you find me. 😂 That’s. Interesting. You know every one of my pains and, you still talk to me. You say really happy things every time even after really uncomfortable conversations occur. Like you do with family, I hate you for saying that. I’m glad you’re here. Now. Gimme the remote.
I think you’re a great writer. Everyone that writes is a little messed up. Every crowd had cannibals. Art is in the bones and it’s in your bones.
A rapper I like called Blueprint said, Fight for your Art or drown in the day to day.
A rapper I worked with today said, you can’t buy that love when someone genuinely connects with your authentic self. When they love what you said as much as you do.
Stage isn’t big enough for all of us. Some settle being fans. I’ve settled you should not.
Hey Kenzie, thank you for this wonderful response. I love those four things — so true – it all boils down to love. hahaha gimme the remote – i laughed out loud at that. thank you for your kind words. I’ll have to look up Blueprint. What a profound thing that rapper said – and gosh, I am touched. thank you Kenzie. Very grateful for you, my friend. Sending massive hugs. goodnight! xox
Print is from Columbus. He’s been doing it for at least a decade on his own. Probably uh. Not in the suburbs. Haha. I’ll email a link.
hahaha awesome. thank you! x
There’s an important thing to realize too. If you’re famous you were put behind a wall twenty years ago. Now. There’s no wall. I found the Apple programming bug months ago about the slow phones. When developing an app for some food banks. I campaigned against Apple and that unfair practice and was blacklisted on social media. So. In a lot of ways the wall remains in favor of the party with the most influence. We agree on a reality, do we wish to report the negative comments? I do when, the argument is not uh, cohesive. You know? Just way out there. Nothing to do with what’s being discussed.
thank you so much for suck kind words of encouragement. Hugs and love xox
thank you for this Kenzie. you’re awesome xox
Aww. Big hearts find big hearts. Uma Thurman said this about cruelty and love:
Personally, it has taken me 47 years to stop calling people who are mean to you ‘in love’ with you. It took a long time because I think that as little girls we are conditioned to believe that cruelty and love somehow have a connection and that is like the sort of era that we need to evolve out of.
Wow what a powerful quote. Thanks for sharing that Kenzie. Hugs and love xox
Continue to believe and preach your positive message! Perfect sermon to tuck away for when you have your church! Praying for you. More on prayer on my blog if you want to wander over!
thank you Rick, for your prayers and for your kindness and encouragement. you’re awesome. can’t wait to check it out! Hugs and love xox
Wow. Caralyn, I’m so sorry. The ugliness displayed in those comments is sickening, but I’m so glad you’re confident in who you are and ultimately Whose you are. It’s in Him we live and move and have our being! Unlike what some on Youtube have commented, I see you as someone who is whole and redeemed, because of what God has done. You have beauty, strength, and confidence, and the grace of God has made all of that possible. By the way, get well!
hey there friend. thank you so much for your kindness. i am truly touched. amen in Him we live!! gosh, thank you. Hugs and love xox
Firstly i hope you get better soon. Please don’t take those peoples comments to heart, they just jealous of you. Its says more about them than you. You are an awesome person and i love reading and seeing your blogs and photos.😘
Wilfred, thank you so much. So true- just have to forget about the comments! Hugs and love xox
Hope you recover from the cold and those spiteful comments. I think you are adorable and very brave.
thank you friend. What a kind thing to say. Hugs and love xox
I cannot fathom what motivates trolls to be so pathologically mean. I feel very sad for them that this is their life. Being bullied is painful. Being a bully is incredibly sad and a total waste of the gift of life. You go girl. I love your blog.
Hey there Jack. I don’t get it either. thank you for your kind words. Hugs and love xox
Prayers for your sickness 🙂 As far as the bullying: Wow! I had one negative post and it nearly destroyed my day! I also wrote about it. No worries, let them hate. They’ve got nowhere to run from themselves. You’re awesome and keep it up!
Hi friend, thank you for your kind words and prayers. it really means a lot. very true! Hugs and love xox
I exactly understand what you must have been feeling. Judging others comes free and there are so many who delight in it. The technology, modern media and the advantage of being in a virtual crowd, just encourages the hecklers.
I experience this every day, day-in and day-out. I am a quiet person and am shy; people make their own stories about me. It makes me very sad and hurt; but I just go on. You are a wonderful person. Stay strong. Your affirmations were a boost to me too..
Love…
hey friend, thank you so much for such kind words and encouragement! it seriously means so much. I’m sorry that you can relate on such a personal level. Sending you so so much love and hugs xox
Hey girl! You killed it with that letter at the end. I loved the line, “Or say or snap or do anything you don’t want.”
thanks Melissa 🙂 yeah snap is simultaneously the best and worst thing ever haha Hugs and love xox
I just hope that you get well much quicker than soon. You are a very wonderful and amazing lady. People hate you because you are doing things in life. You are making the most of your opportunities. They want to do nothing but destroy other people. I have been around these people my entire life. When they see someone better than them, they feel the need to destroy that person. Today, you are that person. They cannot stand the fact that you are a great person, and they desire to tear you down. I say continue to live your life. There are many who are inspired by you. YOU are gorgeous way beyond your bones.
thank you so much for they kind words. I am blushing and am truly touched. thank you. sending you so much love and hugs xo
You are very graciously welcome. Thank you for the love and hugs. Be advised that they viciously attack you because they know that YOU are better than them.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxo 🙂
You are truly one lovely and amazing lady.
Thank you again x
You are very graciously welcome again.
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All I could think of is this ” If the world hate you, ye know that it hated Me before it hated you. If ye were of the world, the world would love his own: but because ye are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of the world, therefore the world hateth you” John 15:18-19. I’d say you’re in good company :):)
Hi Margaret, thank you for this beautiful response. that was actually the first thing that went through my mind – after the initial shock of course – was that verse. thank you for the encouragement. Hugs and love xox
Coincidence, I think not. I’d called that a confirmation Sister :):) big hugs, and much love 🙂
🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼✨💛✨
Don’t even think about the comments. Don’t even waste your time and the precious life God gave you. Move on and do what God wants you to do today!
Hi Ms Min, thank you so much for this encouragement. amen! Hugs and love xox
Congratulations on your 3.5mil. views.
thank you Pete! Hugs and love xox
It is so sad how cruel people can be.
it really is so so sad. hugs to you Ashley!
Whoa! No one deserves hate like that. I’m sorry you are the target of such unwarranted cruelty. Though I do not always agree with you, I still love reading your blog. I don’t understand how people can gate without even trying to get to know the person, just judging on 30 seconds of them.
thank you so much friend. I really appreciate your kindness and encouragement. i’m with you! i don’t understand it one little bit! Hugs and love xox
I wish I could ask all of those trolls if they’d say those nasty and judgemental comments if they were sitting in front of you. This is the dark side of the internet. You’re beautiful inside and out and you’re confident so that’s three triple threat to some. Please keep being you. Keep shining and get well soon.
Hi friend, thank you so much for your support. you’re right – the dark side indeed. thank you for suck kind words. it mens the world. Hugs and love xox
No one deserves to be bullied. Even if people hold to negative views, it is always good to know yourself and how you view yourself. From what I’ve seen, you are a strong woman and you help encourage others, keep at it!
thank you friend. i really appreciate your kind words and encouragement! big hugs to you xo
You’re welcome! Hugs back to you, God bless.
oxoxoxox
So sorry you went through that! People are bullied almost everywhere, work, school, I business etc. And if you add the element of women being treated badly by men, or whites mistreating black people or immigrants being mistreated on a regular basis we can begin to see why the victims can get very angry. I’ve been bullied a number of times, and I’m white. It must be mucj worse for others.
thank you friend. Yeah, it’s really so sad. and I’m sorry that you can so personally relate. sending you so much love and hugs ox
Ok let me be honest… I thought that video was addorable! Don’t listen to the crazy haters online in the famous words of T.Swift “Hater gonna hate hate hate”. Just turn your check and do not sink to there level. I am still a little confused on why the heck anyone would say that about you because it just seems insane. Why do people waste there time writing hateful words to other people? My thought is that they take there anger out on other people instead of admitting there own sin.
Ugh! I know how it feels to be sick and have this going on!
Stop reading the comments it is not worth it, it just makes you feel worse!
You are beautiful inside and out!
-Isabelle ❤️😘
hahah aw, thank you Izzy. Leave it to TSwift to speak the truth!! 🙂 Thank you for your kind words. i’m smiling from ear to ear after reading this. Yeah, we’ve gotta just pray for those people. big hugs to you x
You are awesome! Don’t worry about the bullies!
Thank you so much Gloria! Hugs and love xox
Some people have too much time to waste, they have nothing better to do, so they try to destroy others to feel better. Nothing wrong with your video. You’re beautiful and you shouldn’t take those comments seriously. Hope you feel better soon!
Thank you so much Melanie! yeah, it is really sad that people will do that. thank you for your kind words. Hugs and love xox
I”m so sorry this happened to you.. People are cruel and heartless.. Its the society we live in, sadly. Please don’t let this ruin the experience for you.. You are absolutely ADORABLE in this and truthfully, I did not see anything of what they were saying. You looked and sounded adorable… XO
Hi Robyn, thank you so much for your kind words. I am blushing 🙂 thanks for making me smile. big hugs xo
It’s sad that people will be mean. If it’s any consolation, your post and the comments that followed were pretty encouraging. The bad always sounds louder than the good. But there’s still a lot of good people out there. And God’s light always shines brighter. You’re doing good!
Thank you so much Timothy. I really appreciate it. Yes! His light ALWAYS shines the brightest! big hugs to you x
Haters gonna hate. Don’t take it to heart girl. Most people would never say some of those things without the safety of their computer screens. Keep being fabulous 👊🏻👊🏻👊🏻👊🏻
Hey friend, thank you so much for your kind words. yeah, anonymity brings out the worst in people. Hugs and love xox
sorry you’ve had to experience that nasty flu. Hope you recover your strength fully.
thank you David, I appreciate it. Hugs and love xox
People are mean
yes, they most certainly can be!! Hugs and love xox
The sad reality is that the advent of the internet has amplified almost every negative thing life can offer. Luckily, you seem to have the right perspective and can easily own the pain, but knowing it is temporary and choosing to hear a more positive inner voice is the only one that truly counts. Even all of us, commenting on this, has some sort of anonymity that cannot be touched; so, it is your inner voice that will have the most impact.
Okay, so I had to go to FB to get the full effect of the video and comments. I can honestly say, that NONE of the comments you posted above are accurate – not that you need the validation, but absolutely NONE of them are even close to being correct.
thank you again 🙂 you’re really sweet to have taken the time to do that. you rock, my friend xo
The pleasure is mine!
xoxox
thank you friend, sadly you’re right about that. thank you for your kind words! Hugs and love xox
Not going to lie，I feel furious right now! I can`t believe people would write that. How unbelievably cruel! Sending you hugs. You are beautiful，inside and out!!
oh my gosh, thank you Nicole. I really appreciate your support and kindness and hugs! sending you hugs right back! xoxo
You matter. You always will. Be well. Get well! You have made a difference in people’s lives, especially young women. I am honored to know you through blogging. The Lord strength you today and everyday! Jim
oh Jim, thank you so much for this wonderful comment. i am truly so touched by your affirming words. God is good! Hugs and love xox
It hurts my heart to read even a couple of these disgustingly inhuman comments on the video you made. I don’t know how you managed to read so many – I couldn’t stomach it after two!!! For what it’s worth I think it is a very cute video. And as a Taylor Swift song goes “And the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate Baby, I’m just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake ….I shake it off, I shake it off” (and no, I am not a Taylor Swift fan) that would be my advice to you…shake it off and ignore the mean-spirited morons and cowards that write such venomous and toxic stuff….You are wonderful and I am grateful for your blog and your kindness. I hope you are over the flu (both the bodily virus and the online one) Wishing you bright days and blessings….
thank you so much Carol, I am so touched by your encouraging words. Yeah, I’ve gotta just shake it off! TSwift speaks the truth!! thanks for making me smile. Hugs and love xox
You are most welcome hon. I hope your positive experiences far outweigh the negative. I think you are very brave and very kind. Hugs and love right back!
thanks again Carol! xoxoxox
Caralyn, We love you! You are so brave. My pastor sings a familiar song when bullied. “It’s a Small World After All”, but he changes one word, “world” to “thing”. The truth is, our world now thinks it’s okay to publicly display hate! Hate comes from those who have not stepped into the “Light” of this world, Jesus. And keep in mind, now that a hater knows of you, they might just find your blog, and receive Truth, and healing.
oh mark, thank you so much for your kind words. It’s a small thing after all! that’s so true. Amen – Jesus is the light!! Hugs and love xox
You will be hated by everyone because of my name. But the person who endures to the end will be saved. Matthew 10:22
The Enemy knows where you are most vulnerable and will attack you there using any means possible, like those making all those nasty comments. He wants to silence you because of God’s light and truth you exhibit.
But what you are doing, the witness you are being, the difference you are making matters greatly to those who may be struggling or who just need to hear some truth in their life. God blesses those who are a blessing. You are being a blessing. Never stop believing that.
May God bless you and keep you; may He protect you and give you strength; may He heal you and give you peace.
PS – I’ve enjoyed your blog.
Hi Ronny, thank you so much for this incredibly kind response. that was the first verse I thought of after reading those comments too. Thanks for this awesome perspective, and for your prayer. Hugs and love xox
Any time! 🙂
✨💛✨
Physical beauty may cause a person to stop and stare and say, “OH! WOW. Then move on forgetting what they just saw. But beauty beyond bones is a treasure for all eternity!
oh my gosh, what an incredibly kind thing to say! i’m humbled!! Hugs and love xox
People say things online and it is usually because they wouldn’t have the courage to say anything face to face. And some people are just mean. And I saw that video on Instagram. I thought it was the cutest thing ever, especially when you thought you might have removed an eyebrow.
I know you probably need to know what kind of feedback you are getting online but you have my permission to ignore the people who are mean, rude, and just want to hurt others. I am sorry you were targeted though. Sometimes I purposely try to upset the apple cart with my post and I can’t even get a response most of the time.
Good luck
Hi Tony, thank you so much for your kind words!! you’re wonderful. Yes – just gotta ignore them! Hugs and love xox
Dear Strong Young Girl,
You wrote a very beautiful piece about the bitterness of others, realizing a piece of Biblical truth, that the bitter heart of mankind, without God, is deceitful and full of wickedness.
You’re a beautiful woman in body and soul, undeserving of the spiteful vitriol being flung at you for a simple video.
Remember, your outward is a reflection of the inward, and the Spirit can guide your heart when everyone else turns away.
So gather your thoughts, breath again and enjoy the day the Lord has given you.
Remember, you never have a bad day, just days and better days.
Bad things happen every day, so when fewer bad things happen you’re having a better day.
A little creed I try to live by and repeat when someone says “… having a bad day huh?…”
So God bless and hats off to your faith.
Stay gold.
oh Mr. Sniff, this brought tears to my eyes. thank you. I can’t tell you how much this means to me. Yes – every day given to us by the Lord is a blessing, and when we can look at it that way, it puts a lot of “little” things into perspective. thank you for this kind comment. Hugs and love xox
Words matter, whether written or spoken. As a Christian, my worldview always reverts back to Scripture. As such Scripture tells us this:
Matthew 15:18 But the things that proceed out of the mouth come from the heart, and those defile the man.
Those using words to bully, either online or not, are identifying where and what their heart truly is, in darkness and wicked.
So cyberbullies, keep showing your true colors.
amen to that!!!! thanks again, awesome human 🙂
also, I hope you feel better soon.
thank you again 🙂 xo
Oh dear….all I can say is this: unhappy people will try to make others unhappy. Don’t give in! Be happy and kind. Stay positive! All the very best:)
thank you so much friend. yes! gotta stay positive. big hugs to you x
Sad to say I’m not surprised. I’ve read enough comments on the Internet to just about lose all faith in humanity. But your response was beautiful.
Thank you friend. yeah, sadly anonymity brings that out in people. twitter is a shining example. Hugs and love xox
Great post, hope you feel better soon.
I used to Reddit furiously some time ago, and get involved in all sorts of political screeching matches.
I learned to get really cutting with my comments.
I felt victorious…..and then, over the course of a few more months, like someone loving with an evil buddy who was moonlighting as me.
I realised that I am who I say I am and that how I am on the internet it’s ALSO, who I am.
The Bible has lots to say about ‘The tongue’ and for a brief moment I lived it.
This was not my authentic self – and yet, somehow, obviously, it WAS me.
I did a lot of changing, and discovered that my ‘authentic’ self is someone I can mould, as much as someone I free.
And so now I see the self-hurt and anger that lies behind all those who are cruel to others on & off-line.
I cannot imagine being the target of bullying and hate at a young age.
Great post, thanks.
Thank you so much for this powerful response. you’re right – the bible really does have a lot to say about that. it sounds like you really did a lot of learning and self discovery. i’m glad that gave you such a positive perspective! it is definitely easy to get caught up in the heat of the moment on the web, that’s for sure! Hugs and love xox
Hugs! ❤
thank you Tonya 🙂 hope you have a beautiful weekend! Hugs and love xox
Thank you. Feel better very soon. XO😄❤
xoxoxoxo
What a beautiful letter to a girl just going thru the realities of today’s world. I’m going to share this my young adult daughter and my teenage daughter. Say a prayer that it will give them permission to put away the expectations that are constantly glaring in their faces!
oh thank you so much L. I am honored that you would pass it along. I will definitely say a prayer. Hugs and love xox
I have faced this kind of online ridicule so many times it is ridiculous. People really can be sooo cruel. Thank you for your blog. I read most of your posts and I think you are a wonderful, beautiful person inside and out. These kind of people actually show their non-intelligence in the things they say.. they kinda’ do themselves in, so I wouldn’t think twice about any of it. I hope you can continue to feel God’s peace and I will definitely pray for you. It is the worst when you are so sick and you have to try and process these kinds of things! I hope you get better quickly!!! Lots of love your way!!
I’m so sorry that you can relate on such a personal level. thank you for your kind words. it seriously means the world. Thank you for your prayers – know that you are in mine too 🙂 big hugs xo
Baby Girl,
I need your prayers. Went to see Daddy today and found him laying in the middle of the floor. Mental state half there and half not. Is in hospital with stroke. I just got home as had to come to get some things. Keep praying this is eating my guts out. Outside of Brother he is my best friend! Love you and God Bless, SR
Oh my gosh, SR – I am sending up so many prayers right now. I am so sorry that you and your father are going through this right now. my heart is with you during this terrifying time. Lord, please fully heal and protect SR’s father. Strengthen his brain and heart and restore him completely. Please comfort and be with SR right now during this time of great anxiety and fear. We place this family in your hands right now, Lord, fully trusting that you are Healer and Comforter. Jesus, we trust in You. Amen. Please keep me posted. I will be praying hard for you all. sending all my love and hugs xo
I am so sorry to hear of the abuse you have been receiving. Hope my one positive message helps in a small way to forget the nasty stuff.
thank you so much, Joe. it most certainly does 🙂 Hugs and love xox
Thanks Caralyn.
I’m passing this on to my daughter whose pre-teen son is bullied at school. And he’s just learned that he can’t go to the school he had hoped to go to for secondary (junior high) school, so he will likely end up with the bullies again.
I hope it will encourage her in some way, but even if not, thank you anyway!
Stephen
Hi Stephen, I’m honored that you would pass it along. Thank you. I’m heart broken to hear that your grandson is being bullied. My prayers are with him. Gosh. Sending all my love and hugs xox
My oldest grandson was bullied and I was so very angry.
It was so bd that my daugther started giving him ride to school before she went to work.
There was not a solution there at all unless my grandson became a bully himself. Cody, has a beautiful heart even now that he is almost 23 years old.
I say a prayer tonigth for your quicker recovery. God bless you.
Hey Patrizia, thank you so much for sharing this. gosh, that breaks my heart. I’m so glad that he’s doing well now. praise God. thank you for your prayers. Hugs and love xox
prayers also for SR dad now!
yes!!!!
Babe this is my saying. “Wish everyone the double they wish you.”
Like GaryVee says : You do you!
There is always going to be bad out there. But don’t let that ruin your day.
We ain’t here to please everyone.
Much Hugs girl! 💙
thank you so much Ms. Hernandez, yes! Do you! thanks for the encouragement. Hugs and love xox
I, too, am less worried about what others think (and will probably get some negative comments):
https://sincerelysteve.wordpress.com/2018/01/31/message-in-a-bottle/?preview=true
thank you for sharing . Hugs and love xox
H
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aw thank you again xoxoxoxoxo
Don’t worry about the bullies, something somewhere in their lineage something is broken and they are projecting their own brokenness
thank you friend. there’s a lot of truth in that. hurting people hurt people. Hugs and love xox
Stay true to yourself, that is all that matters. Sorry to hear that something you were trying to do for someone else didn’t work out, I wish you all the best as you sort through this and in your recovery. Feel better soon!
Thank you friend, I really appreciate your kind words 🙂 Hugs and love xox
Very proud of you young lady! Get better soon. Always remember “whose” you are! Beautiful child of God you are!! Prayers abound for you all the way from Las Vegas! Laugh Often and Fear Not! Pastor David!
thank you so much David. I really appreciate your prayers and support. Yes! Fear not!! Hugs and love xox
Wow. Over 3000 comments. You must be doing something right. I will get there one day.
thank you friend, i appreciate that 🙂 Hugs and love xox
I’m sorry you had to even experience such pathetic negativity, but I hope you get some confidence from the positive/supportive comments you receive.
I’ve never used a face mask in my life! But your skin was glowing in that video! Is the onyx mask that good! Maybe I’ll try it! 😂
All you can do is be you and you’re doing an incredible job with that!
thank you Tyrone, for your kind words and support. haha thank you! yeah it was a great mask! big big hugs xo
Wow. Mean people. They’re just jealous because you’re hot. 😀
Hahaha so true!
hahaha you two are making me blush!!!
haha oh my gosh you’re funny. thanks for the encouragement and for making me chuckle 🙂 xox
Just a bunch of sad, jealous losers. Pretty pathetic 😂
I’ve learned to never take these things to heart. People will say mean stuff, but we should never let that affect us 🙂
thanks friend, i appreciate your encouraging words. hugs xo
All I can say is that it’s people like you that give me hope that this world isn’t an entirely lost cause. As someone who was bullied (and worse), I celebrate your attitude and your fortitude. As someone with a daughter and granddaughters, I applaud your example for them and others. As someone who has faced and overcome certain struggles myself, you’re an inspiration and I can wholeheartedly say you demonstrate a strength and depth of character that folks could aspire to — some far more than others. You just keep on being your amazing, adorable, awesome, wonderful self!!!
oh my gosh what a kind thing to say. thank you. I’m sorry that you can so personally relate. It sounds like you are an overcomer 🙂 that is so inspiring. thank you for the wonderful affirmation. it means a lot. Hugs and love xox
Well, perhaps an overcomer still overcoming. But you are so very welcome! Thank you!
life is a long journey 🙂 oxoxoxoxoxoxo
Really pathetic. Sad to hear you had to see all those comments. I’m also very sensitive, but in this case, you rock. So let trolls waste their lives online while you’re enjoying real life 😘
thanks Elitsa, i appreciate your support. big big hugs xo
Hugs back ❤
xoxo
Haters will always hate and potatoes will always potate. Don’t lower yourself by reading that bullshit.
potatoes will always potate hahahahhahahahaha love it. thanks friend xox
This is great wake up post to all (young) commentators! Just because you don’t know someone, (you just saw a picture or video or something like that, and you feel that person is anonymous to you), you still can’t write anything about that person! She (or he) is real human being who have emotions!
thank you so much friend! amen to that!!! all people have feelings!! be kind!! 🙂 Hugs and love xox
Thanks for writing this. It does take a lot to open up anymore, especially when it results in this type of backlash.
I honestly don’t know how people can sleep at night after behaving this way. Would they do this to their child, their friend, if they weren’t hiding behind a screen? This says more about them than it does you.
There’s a lot of people who truly appreciate you and what you’re doing.
Hi Julie, thank you so much for your kind words and support. I really means the world. Yeah, it really is lower than low to anonymously be mean on the internet. we’re better than that, people! haha – big big hugs xo
Aw, don’t let those comments bother you. Those poor people have never heard Lincoln’s words: “Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt.”
thank you so much friend, i really appreciate your support. amen! Hugs and love xox
This is my favorite part right here:
“Believe in you. Believe in the difference you can make to this world – even if just one person.
Compassion, generosity, faith, honesty, humility, empathy, kindness – those don’t get retweets or followers. But those are what make you rise to the top. They’re what really matter in this life.”
This is what really matters in this life. Thanks for sharing, hope you get well soon.
oh thank you so much, friend. i am so glad it resonated with you 🙂 big hugs xo
My dear friend! My “adopted” daughter! I love you! You are loved! I’m sitting here with a few tears in my eyes at all of the hate poured out at you. I’m not even going to spend a second commenting on what sort of Jerry Springer trolls do this.
I sorely wish you hadn’t gone through all of those hateful comments. I scrolled past them after a few. I didn’t care to read any more trash about my friend.
I and 30,000+ know better. Time for you to go back and read Beauty and the ED Beast, eh? I’m glad you could pull yourself out of that and write such an inspiring letter to younger bullied girls! But then that’s what you do; snatch victory from the jaws of defeat. Or, rather, that’s what Jesus and the Holy Spirit do through you.
You MUST see the following video about Maksim Chmerkovskiy from DWTS confronting a hater who never met him but formed her hateful ideas about him strictly from online: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=adth1Rmvb4s
I think you’ll identify with him and appreciate how he dealt with it.
I hope this finds you feeling better!
Hi Jeff!! oh, thank you so much 🙂 this brought a tear to my eye 🙂 You’re right- i’m going to go back and read that incredible post of yours again. i have it bookmarked for occasions just like this 🙂 and i can’t wait to watch that vid – thanks for passing it along. Jeff, I’ll say it again – you are a blessing in my life and i am so grateful to have you as a friend and “adoptive” dad. You rock. Big hugs to you and Julie! x
I’m so sorry to hear that you were bullied online, Caralyn. Although I’ve never been bullied, I have at times felt that I was inadequate against the rest of my peers. Now though, I’ve learned to just be me instead of seeking the approval of those around me. Sure, that habit tends to pop up now and then, but now I just decide to lean on the Father instead.
Hi friend, thank you so much for your kind words. Yes! We’ve got to let go of others’ thoughts…i’m working on it! haha amen! Hugs and love xox
As Michelle Obama said: “When they go low…we go high”. Keep on being you and sending positive energy to the world. It’s what the world needs.
amen! thank you so much Bill. Hugs and love xox
I was lucky enough to get through school before social media was a big deal but I didn’t escape the bullying. They just did it to my face or where they knew I could hear. It is extremely hard. But I think online bullying is an extra special kind of low. It truly shows how mean and cowardly that person is when they post stuff like that. What happened to “if you don’t have anything nice to say, shut your trap”? As for the Botox, I’ve had it for migraines multiple times. If they’re walking out with injection site bruises, they’re not using a very good dermatologist and might want to find a new one. That’s not normal.
yeah, i can’t imagine what school must be like now with the pressures of social media. All we had was Facebook and Instant Messanger hahaha and even that was tough! thanks for your kind words – I’m sorry that you can relate so personally to this post. people truly can be mean and cowardly for sure. amen! thanks for your support. Hugs and love xox
I’m sorry your not feeling well and that people online decided to bully you. I hope you feel better soon and just know you have a community of people here who care about you. Don’t let those bullies get to you because your definitely a better person than that.
thank you so much Raney, yeah i have been so touched by the support. thank you for your kindness. Hugs and love xox
I’m sure it’s been said but the video was great. You are utterly adorable and your skin looks beautiful. People are cruel because of their own insecurities. Its a lot easier to attack and tear down the people that are living authentically than to examine ones own heart.
Keep on living your life openly and authentically and don’t mind those sad, heart-shriveled haters!
p.s. LOVE how you turned a hateful experience into one of encouragement and love. <3
oh my gosh, thank you Sierra. You’re so kind. you’re right about that – gotta just shake it off! big hugs xox
Seriously some people have nothing better to do (or say). I suspect the real reason was you were “real” on the video.
I remember my younger bunch of kids encountering something like this for the first time on our arrival in Taiwan among the western ex pat kids. You had to “be cool” say the right thing, wear the right thing etc. (and basically put down everyone outside the group as geeks). The kids caught up in it were so insecure (that’s what made them act that way, one mistep and they became the target) but with the addition of a coloured girl (who was ostrosized for being different) one by one they won them over with the bait of true friendship when they saw them stand up for each other. The whole critical trip tends to mask insecurity.
Be happy in that you were merely the victim not those afflicted with such negativity and suspicion that they don’t know a naturally beautiful woman when they see one.