A Palmless Sunday

Posted on by beautybeyondbones

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Quarantine Day 25. NYC

I’m sitting here this Monday morning, eating my breakfast at my little table by the window, overlooking the empty street below.

I never used to do this. I’ve been an eat-at-my-desk-while-I-work girl my entire life. But since the quarantine, I’m allowing myself the time to appreciate those breaks. And I’ve found that I’ve been drawn to sit by the window, and look out. Probably because it’s my link to the outside world, as we’re sheltering in place here in Manhattan. But nonetheless, I’ve found a sense of comfort there.

And this morning, I’ve noticed two things: first — the birds. For the first time – literally ever – in the nine years I’ve lived in NYC, I’ve heard birds chirping outside. The deafening silence of the deserted streets has allowed me to hear the birds singing. And loudly! They woke me up this morning!

But I’ve also noticed the constant stream of emergency vehicles below. No taxis. No cars. Just ambulance after ambulance after ambulance.

It’s the beginning of Holy Week. Yesterday – Palm Sunday – marked the start of our final preparation for Easter. And I’ve gotta say, it was surreal, watching the Mass on a little 12″ laptop from the confines of my 500 square foot studio apartment, that has become more of a cell than a home.

Growing up, Palm Sunday was one of the “stick out” Masses that I’d always remember and look forward to. Why? Because we got Palms to play with during Mass.

Yep – I remember walking into the sanctuary, and there’d be this huge mound of palms for each person to take one. I’d always get so excited – and my brothers and I would meticulously fold them into a cross, which I’d then proudly display in my room. A tradition that I still do to this day.

And to be honest, I still get that same rush of excitement every time I see the mound of palm branches at the door.

So you can imagine my disappointment this year, when instead of folding a palm branch in the pew, I was watching a computer screen while staring at a pile of laundry begging to be folded.

Later that afternoon, as I was deep cleaning my apartment, I came across my Palm cross that I had made the year before. It had fallen behind my dresser, and in my vacuuming frenzy, I exhumed it, dusty and dry.

I smiled – what are the odds? And it made me think…Why do we have that huge pile of palms every Palm Sunday. What is the significance, really?

Well, for a two-sentence history lesson: A few days before Jesus was arrested, He rode into Jerusalem on a donkey, and in reverence and adoration, the people flooded the streets and placed palm branches and cloaks on the ground in front of Him. They were preparing the way for their Lord — praising Him and laying down what they had to create a “paved” pathway for His journey — ultimately to His Passion and death.

And reflecting on this, I was quite saddened that around the world, Christians are celebrating this crucially important Sunday in isolation, and without palms.

They were our participation. A physical symbol that we could join with the crowd and help to prepare Jesus’ way, and offer what we have to Him, as He began the horrific journey to Calvary, out of love for us.

And that’s when it hit me.

This year — this Palm Sunday — as we’re all trapped in our houses without palms…this year, we are the palms.

You. Me. We are each our own palm branch to lay before the Lord.

I have nothing to offer but myself.

My life. My body. My spirit.

This Palm Sunday, I can lay myself down in front of Jesus as He makes His way towards the cross to lay His life down for me.

This quarantine has given us, really for the first time, the incredible gift of time. A luxury that most of us are never afforded in our crazy days. I don’t know about you, but even in the one hour I give to God on Sundays, my mind is still preoccupied with other things…tasks, worries, crushes, the latest Bachelor episode.

Right now, we have the unprecedented gift of time — to sit by windows, listen to birds, FaceTime our friends. And spend time with the Lord.

We can work with Him to self-reflect and identify the areas of our life that need improvement: Am I loving people the way God would love them? How can I be more charitable? Am I patient with others and myself? Have I sought forgiveness where I need to? Have I forgiven someone that I should? Do I honor my parents? Do I respect the body God gave me?

How can God use my life?

We finally have time to think and pray about these incredibly important things.

It’s pretty evident to me that God is at work right now.

I mean, everything has been stripped away as we’re in lockdown. We’re forbidden to leave our homes, and now – even attending Church itself is prohibited. Not to mention, we’re in a forced fast from the Eucharist, and that absence is felt now, more acutely than ever.

But it’s as though all of the noise in our life has been muted, and for the first time, we can hear the metaphorical birds.

“Can you hear Me now?”

Maybe God is using this time of forced quiet, to allow His call to us to become loud and clear.

Maybe we’re finally still enough to hear. And maybe our weary hearts are finally in a place where we will choose to listen.

All I have to offer is myself. All I have to lay down at the feet of Jesus is my broken, mess of a life. It’s not perfect. I’ve been in the same sweatpants for three days in a row now, but it’s what I’ve got.

I can give Him me to transform. I can give Him me to use.

Jesus is calling us to Himself, right now in this moment. They say that God will move mountains to get to our hearts. Well…we’re witnessing Him do just that: He’s brought the world to a standstill, He’s silenced our distractions (no school, no NBA, no March Madness, no movies, no TV production, no vacationing, no parties), and He’s standing in front of us with outstretched arms, inviting us into His warm, life changing embrace. An embrace to comfort us as we’re scared for our health, our jobs, our loved ones, our doctors, our economy, our futures.

He’s calling us back to Him.

I have nothing to offer but myself. And it turns out, that’s all He’s ever wanted.

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234 thoughts on “A Palmless Sunday”

  1. Yes, He wants only our hearts. Did you know the left-over palms are burnt and mixed with blessed oil for the following year’s Ash Wednesday? I think that’s a neat cycle and all reminds me at the start of Lent, of the ‘joy set before him’! Joy that the world didn’t give so the world cannot take away. Thank you for your post – I too still have last year’s palm cross on my fridge, so I put it out and celebrated communion on Palm Sunday, with my son and with the whole spiritual church. Happy Holy Week. xxx

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    1. Hi Dawn! yes i did know that! i love that beautiful full circle of the palms. stay well my friend! Hugs and love xox

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    1. thank you so much Mike!! oh wow, i’m so touched by that 🙂 glad you thought so! stay well my friend! Hugs and love xox

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  4. Hey Carolyn! I love your post. God put you on my heart this morning as I was praying and enjoying the birds myself. Praying that He protects you and your family and guards your mind with His perfect peace. I’ve been thinking the same thing about God removing distractions. Yesterday, I felt impressed on my heart that now is the time to listen. Now is the time for us to tune our hears to the sound of His Voice, no longer the distractions of the world. Keep up your amazing posts!

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    1. Hi Rachel! oh thank you so much! and gosh, i so appreciate your prayers more than you! especially for my family! my brother is a doctor and is on the front lines right now without adequate PPE. it’s really worrisome. Amen to that! thanks for your encoruagment! know you’re in my prayers too! Hugs and love xox

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  5. Wow. That is amazing you found that cross behind your dresser. The timing… wow.

    This is so good Girl! I love your posts about God. 💕

    I pray this is all over soon and we emerge closer to God and stay that way. 🙏🏻

    {{hugs}} ❤️

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  6. This is beautiful! Blessings to you in Manhattan. God is there with you as well as with me in California. You shine, girl. I can see it from here.

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    1. Thank you so much Amy! Praying for you and your community 🙂 Stay well my friend! big big big hugs xox

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  8. Such a beautiful post… You have captured my feelings exactly! Palm Sunday was always one of the most exciting Masses for me as a kid, after Midnight Mass on Christmas, and Easter Sunday vigil, Palm Sunday was a close 3rd! It’s so sad to see all of the changes that are taking place in our world today, but as you put it, this time, WE are the palms! Thank you so much for that! I was beginning to let all of this get to me. I began to question why. But no more. Thank you! You have pointed out what I have known all along, but somehow I let it get lost amidst all of this. While watching the Palm Sunday Mass on TV, I couldn’t help but make the comparison to what happened that day all those years ago, to what is happening today. Then: they released Barabbas; Today: they are releasing prisoners in some states ; Then: They tortured our Lord with unthinkable cruelty. Today: They have closed churches – even through Easter Sunday; it is as if they were trying to stop the Resurrection itself. (which of course, we all know can’t be done) Well, sorry if I’m too long winded here, basically, I just wanted to thank you for putting it all into perspective for me! Oh, and have a blessed Holy Week!

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    1. hi friend! oh thank you so much! yes!! We are the palms! and haha i agree — it was always my close third as well! 🙂 i appreciate all your powerful thoughts in this reflection. stay well! Hugs and love xox

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  9. Friend: What a great post! This is one of the best, to me, that you have ever written. The earth is the Lord’s, and the fulness thereof; the world, and they that dwell therein. For he hath founded it upon the seas, and established it upon the floods.(Psalm 24;1-2) It seems we as children of God, as well as writers are all on the same page. When you get a chance stop by https://rhemalogy.com/2020/04/05/christian-writers-really-need-to-be-writing-now/ I think you will really appreciate it and be blessed. Blessings and Peace to you this Holy Week.

    Love Always,
    Claudia

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    1. hi Claudia! oh wow thank you so much! i am so touched by your generous words! amen to that! looking forward to checking out your post! Hugs and love xox

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  11. Just beautiful, Caralyn! This unreal time is certainly teaching us all so many valuable lessons. Thank you for sharing yours – this one is especially powerful. Surrender. So much hinges on our surrender to God. Take care and be safe!

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    1. Hi Patty! thank you so much 🙂 You’re so right – the timing of all of this is surreal. especially becuase NYC’s “peak” is projected to be this Easter Sunday. Just wild. stay well Hugs and love xox

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  12. Your post is so beautiful and so right!! -We give ourselves to Christ.

    I wanted to share this video with you because, believe it or not, there is a church that claims to be Christ’s restored and true and living church on this earth and a Moses-like prophet in our time. I wanted to share that because ALL are invited to listen to the voice of the Lord through his servants who hold the true keys upon the earth -in preparation to his Second Coming. It is a church that preaches clearly our purposes as literal children of our Father in Heaven and that not only will we be resurrected as Christ was, but we can receive salvation AND exaltation as found in the last chapters of Revelation. We can live together in eternal family units with God, with the covenants we make in temples that now dot the earth. To learn more go to ComeUntoChrist.org. I can witness that this is REAL and true. I know for sure and for real that Christ came and restored His church in it’s fullness (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints) because true priesthood authority is important to our Father who wants a house of order and a people ready to receive him. You too can join that cause, if you desire. But if not, this is really great to know about at least. 💗

    On Palm Sunday we got to participate (with our hankies as palms) over the internet together as a world of believers doing the Hosannah shout during a solemn assembly. Hosannah means God Save Us! We also are holding a fast on Good Friday for healing and for the protection of those working on the front lines -anyone can participate.

    Also, I always love your posts. You are a strong woman and an awesome influence out there. 💗👍👍

    Lots of love,
    your friend,
    Millennial Believer.

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    1. Hi friend! oh gosh thank you so much! And thank you for sharing about that organization. sounds truly powerful! stay well my freind! Hugs and love xox

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    1. Thank you so much Penny 🙂 I’m glad it resonated with you. yes! we are the palms! stay well! Hugs and love xox

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  14. Your posts are very inspiring and uplifting! I haven’t been able to read many of them yet, but all the ones I have read are really good and uplifting!!

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    1. Hi Claire, oh gosh thank you so much 🙂 i’m so glad you’ve enjoyed them! stay well! Hugs and love xox

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  15. Love your post. I have the blessing of space inside and out, and plants. I cut a few small palm branches and put them on my front door. A silent waving, but waving nonetheless.

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    1. Hi Katie! thank you so much! aw, i love that so much. what a beautiful thing to do to brighten up your neighborhood! stay well! Hugs and love xox

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  16. Thank you, Caralyn. As always, for me, you think and feel and write with an introspective depth of integrity and insight.

    Your word, “This year, we are the palms” (for) “I have nothing to offer but myself” is both compelling for me and comforting to me as an existential encouragement to see myself, indeed, my self as something…someone to give unto God. Though such self-rendering is always something…someone God seeks, it is in a time like this, as you point out, when all else – distractions, preoccupations, etc. – is stripped away that, as you can hear the birds chirping, I, more readily (perhaps, too, more willingly) listen to and for “the still small voice of God.”

    With gratitude and love, be well, stay well,
    Paul

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    1. thank you so much Paul, i really appreciate that. glad it resonated with you!!! yes! we’ve to to really listen for that still small voice! stay well friend! Hugs and love xox

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  18. Hello BBB. I just wanted to thank you. In recent months I’d lost my connection to God and spirituality… and I’ve been spiralling down into depression. But this post of yours about palms helped to prod me back towards God. I’ve just written a big post about this experience. It wasn’t anything in particular that you wrote, it was much more the spirit and feeling which runs through your writing… something about your work touched my heart. And it helped begin a healing process for me. I feel like God is showing me the path out of my depression. So thank you!

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    1. Gosh, Thank you so much for sharing that. I’m sorry to hear that these last few months have been difficult. know that nothing is ever final with God. He is always waiting for us with outstretched arms:) we are so dearly loved. I’m humbled by your generous words. Thank you my friend. Stay well.

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  20. Hello Caralyn!
    What a beautiful thought that we are the palms….
    Jesus did say, “I am the vine and you are the branches…”
    But I never thought of us as being “palm branches”!! Love it!
    One of my favorite children’s sermons on Palm Sunday is to tell the kids, “On Palm Sunday, with Jesus riding in on a donkey and having a parade, everyone was “high-fiving” each other, hitting their palms against one another and that is why it is called “Palm Sunday!”

    Another one with the kids is, “Everyone place out their hands, palms up!” (The kids love this) Then I pull out a can of whipped cream and spray it all into their hands.
    See?
    This is a Palm Sundae!!!

    Have a blessed day. Thank you for faithfully “liking” my blogs! You’re the best!
    Hang in there on those quiet streets of NYC!
    Peace,
    David!

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  21. It’s been a while since I last visited your blog, but I am so glad I did.
    I haven’t done it in a long time, but I have spent the first lent EVER maintaining abstinence from meat on Friday and I have prayed my Rosary every evening for the past three weeks.
    I say this, although, I am someone that is tarnished by sin and question everything about myself, but reading your posts are always a welcome blessing.

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  23. Hi Caralyn, how are you doing there in NYC today? I hadn’t been writing at my site in a long while (Life’s busyness …) but this Covid19 isolation has me reaching out and also reading your thoughts here more often. This is kind of a conglomeration of replies to your past several posts, I hope that is ok. First of all, I’ve been praying for you (whom I have known only as an online acquaintance but for a long while, it seems, as I’ve followed your journey, or journeys) because I can empathize with the isolation especially for a person who is used to being out and about, busy and walking the city and traveling as you (and I) normally do. When you wrote of the morgue truck down the block, I felt ill for you. Yes, Nature is some consolation (the Lord sends the cheering sounds of birds), the city cheers en masse, and family and friends connect via social media – but of course it is not the same. When you wrote so eloquently of missing the pulse – yes! Even I as an occasional visitor of NYC get that: it was always a delight and a thrill to walk for hours, catch the architecture, people, food, parks, a show… I’ve always had so much fun in New York City! It never mattered that the hotel rooms in the best locations were rather small; I was only in them to sleep and shower. I imagine your apartment is similar in that way, too, and gosh all dwellings seem smaller these days. I empathize. Before I write a novel here, thank you for the concept of We the palms (what I most miss, even from childhood, is the silky smoothness of them and quietly appreciating holding that blessed beauty of nature right in my hand all during mass!) and also, to end with a bit of levity here, thank you for the tip (which I have since passed on to several friends & family): when ordering from instacart or similar, specify 1 Bunch of bananas rather than 6 bananas. (Fwiw, I have frozen sliced bananas for future use in smoothies…they stick together so you can package small, if you want.) Stay well, keep your chin up and a smile in your heart. We’ll get through this. (Feel free to delete this rambling comment… or you could just leave this: Saying hello & thank you, thinking of you, and keeping you and all of NYC in my prayers! ~ Peri)

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    1. Hi Peri, thank you so much for sharing your heart in this thoughtful reflection. you’re right – we’ll get through this. NYC is tough and will persevere 🙂 thank you for your prayers! know that you’re in mine too! and thanks for the great instacart trick! i just did the same with broccoli! hahahah oh boy…stay well! Hugs and love xox

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      1. Thank you so much for the hugs, love, and prayers! Always welcomed of course, but last night I had a delightful turn of events, something I’ve been praying about for a long while (a family thing; aren’t we always praying for our families?!) so… I am especially grateful for your prayers. Stay well, keep your chin up and joy in your heart. Oh and – your generous spirit is a gift. Don’t fret; with the Lord, all in good time, for sure. : )

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  26. Thank for continuing to come to my blog faithfully I thank God for you.. I love your writing.. I feel a softness or spirit in you.. it’s been a long since I heard birds that must be so nice for you to hear that which is not normally evident in busy streets, we are all learning something from this period. A few more beautiful souls are reading along on what I’m doing. It’s a miracle really.. usually only the one or twos. Blessed be HIS name.. ❤️

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    1. Thank you so much Sharon. Your encouraging words mean the world. You’re right – blessed by His name! Stay well! Hugs and love xox

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  27. God is at work, speaking to our hearts, my sister. He’s trying to quiet our heart, giving us a moment to truly listen. To what His love, needs our hearts to know. For a time, such as this! Yes indeed, lay your heart, at the foot of His love. Be blessed, you’re forever in His care! Nice share, blessings!

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    1. Yes He really is Warren. What a beautiful and comforting note! Thank you! Big hugs to you xox stay well x

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    1. Hi Dawn thank you so much 🙂 amen to that! Hosanna is our song!! hope you’re having a blessed Good Friday! Hugs and love xox stay well x

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  30. Hi, Beauty!

    This is so beautiful! It resonates with me. I truly think He is reaching out, whispering and beckoning to us. He’s never wanted much. Just us! So simple and profound! I pray we will hear and heed Him!

    Be safe, may the Lord continue to bless and protect you!!

    Peach

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    1. Aw thank you so much Peach!! So glad this resonated with you! I think you’re so right – He is calling us to him! Stay well! Hugs and love xox

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    1. thank you!!! Amen! that’s the best thing we can do: surrender our hearts to Him! stay well! Hugs and love xox

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  32. True story! Especially today, Divine Mercy Sunday. We must believe Jesus LONGS for us, as imperfect as we are! God bless you today as you rest in His boundless love! 🥰🙌🏻🙏🌹❤️

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    1. Thank you so much Ashley! Yes! I so agree – Divine Mercy Sunday made my long for Mass in a particularly acute way stay well! Hugs and love xox

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  33. AMEN AND AMEN!!! So true sis. Well written and I agree with every convicting questions that you asked yourself and that we all should use as a guide to examine our hearts. He has put everything thing that had taken away our focus and time being spent and stayed on Him. He wants us and needs us for the fulfillment of His will/purpose on the earth. What a Father of compassion! i ❤ Him! "this year, we are the palms." So true. Everyday we must lay at His feet and allow Him to transform us more into the likeness of Christ! Blessings and more strength to you sis! 💛

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    1. thank you Tammy!!!! you’re right, this is a unique time to truly get our minds right and focus on Him! praying for you! Hugs and love xox

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    2. You’re on a reading roll!!! thank you friend. Yes! Lay at His feet to be transformed! love that! Hugs and love xox

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