Even Screech

I’m going to tell you something that’s going to change your life:

SAVED BY THE BELL IS ON NETFLIX!

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I know. I’m sorry. Say goodbye to your social life because from now on, all you’re going to want to do is Netflix & Chill with “Preppy” and the gang. 

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But there’s something about Saved that is so alluring: Yes, Zack has some pretty funny antics and shenanigans; yes, all the girls want to be Kelly Kapowski and all the boys want to date her…

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…yes, it’s a fabulous opportunity to relive the glory days of the nineties and its parachute pants and neon crop top splendor.

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But the thing that most captivates audiences and keeps them coming back for more, is the camaraderie and the chemistry between the friends.

I mean, talk about #squadgoals!

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But in all seriousness, the show works because the group is so on point. Tight nit. There for each other. And we, as the viewer, feel like part of the gang.

I’m in a season of my life right now that’s really “friend rich.” Which sounds pretty strange….Did she just brag on here? Did I read that right? 

  

Yes. Except it’s not a brag. Because for a long, long time, that was not the case. At all.

During my anorexia, I was in a relational desert. To say the least.

The thing about eating disorders – or any addiction – is that you turn entirely into yourself. Just leave me alone with my disease. 

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My junior and senior year of high school, my friends saw me wasting away, and they were worried, They’d reach out, call, text, stop by my house, contact my mom – but I never returned any calls. I wouldn’t even pick up the phone. I was too wrapped up in my anorexia. I was in the midst of a mental hurricane, and just couldn’t escape.

And as a result, my relationships suffered.  Not that my friends stopped caring, but after two years of reaching out and being turned away, they simply stopped calling.

I have regained most of those relationships, praise God, but a handful were never repaired.

  
So when I say that I’m in a “friend rich,” period of my life, I can only say that because I know the opposite. I have seen the bleakness of a life alone – alone with ED – and now truly appreciate the value of relationships.

  
In these past few months, I have been just struck by how grateful I am for the people in my life. Struck by the richness and true fullness of life that is the result of community.

I have woken up countless times after fun nights out with my friends, thinking to myself, “Wow — this is recovery. This is the best part of freedom from ED:”  Loving people and letting them love me in return.

Because the fact is this: our hearts are made for community. We’re hardwired to share experiences, and laugh and lean on each other, and experience reciprocal trust with people who truly know who you are and love you just the same.

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I’ve mentioned before I’ve deemed that this was the “Year of ‘Yes.’”

Well I’m giving a status report that a Life of “Yes” leads to abundance. Leads to joy. To adventures. To deep and honest relationships.

And to a support system. Here’s the truth: friends help you see your worth when you can’t see it yourself. 

  

And often times, we don’t have to look farther than the people around our dinner table: our family.

Living in New York, my friends have become like family. It’s true. And I am so grateful for that. But being home for Easter, I was reminded just how special those relationships are.

My sister-in-law, my mom and I stayed up until 2am one night talking and laughing and sharing our hearts. That emotional vulnerability was simply non-existent during my disease. I let no one in. I was a frickin Fort Knox. But breaking down those walls, exposing the real me, and being at peace with who that is — that’s recovery. That’s living a life of freedom.

  

  
There are so many reasons we build walls around our hearts. Maybe you feel that you’re unlovable, like I did for a long time. Maybe you find yourself trapped in a mental hurricane of depression, or addiction, or doubt, or jealousy. Maybe you’ve been hurt before, and so opening up your heart is terrifying. Beyond your limitations. You’ve found your comfort zone behind the walls of distance, or busyness, or anger, or silence, or isolation.

There is an abundance of joy waiting outside those walls. Waiting to be seized.

And it starts with letting people in.

It starts with letting people experience the real you. The real you deserves a shot.

It starts with saying yes.

  
And if you ever doubt or feel apprehensive, just remember: even Screech was loved and accepted. Give yourself a chance.

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beautybeyondbones

BBB: Because we're all recovering from something. // For speaking/business inquiries: beautybeyondbones@yahoo.com

138 thoughts on “Even Screech

  1. There is peace when we can openly share where we have been and where we are…a good component of recovery. And thank you for making me laugh with your “fricken Fort Knox” line! I can so relate! Thank you for sharing your journey!

    1. haha thanks Rick:) yeah Fort Knox…my dad is the king of slightly obscure “one liners.”I guess I learn from him! Haha but you’re so right- peace indeed. Thanks for stopping by!

  2. Not only is Saved By the Bell great because it depicts wonderful and strong friendships, but the show is so great because shows like it simply don’t exist anymore in abundance — shows that have morals, shows that are genuine, shows that teach the viewer a lesson after viewing. That’s what I miss.

    Congratulations for being in a friend-rich part of your life — you deserve it.

    All the best,

    pathswewalk.com

    1. You’re so right! There just ISN’T another show that has filled it’s shoes. Gossip girl, glee, one tree hill— just not quite the same. I was a little late to the SBTB party–it was more during my older siblings’ time so I’m so glad it’s on Netflix! 🙌 thanks for the kind and encouraging words. It means a lot. Hugs xox

  3. I loved the paragraph where you say, “our hearts are made for community.” It is SO true!! And, we all have so many gifts and talents to offer others, even if we struggle to identify those talents and gifts in ourselves.

    Beautiful reminder that we are all made to “be there” for each other on our journeys!

    1. Thanks Pamela! Yes, I am so grateful for where I am today. It’s been a journey, but I am where I’m supposed to be:) thanks for stopping by! Have a beautiful evening xox

  4. What an amazing journey. I can so relate being afraid opening up to people. Though I did not have sn ED I experienced depression and not letting people in. It took my son with special needs to break through my barriers and now I am free. Great post and God bless. So happy to hear you are letting in people and realizing your inner beauty.

    1. Hi Joanne, thank you for this reflection. So happy for you that you’ve found the freedom that comes with being open as well. God is good! Thanks for stopping by! Sending hugs and love xox

  5. So true…I’ve been in wall building seasons (and I may be coming out of one now). What walls can do is keep out a lot of bad, but they can also keep out a lot of good too. It’s something that I try to remember as I tear down my wall, brick by brick to let some of that good in. It isn’t easy, but I’m hoping that once I do, it will be worth it.

    Thanks so much. 🙂

    1. Hi T. Thank you for sharing this. Yes, brick by brick they will come down. And there is so much freedom and joy to be had! I’m cheering you on in your demolition project 🙂 hugs and love xox

  6. Thank you for your post! I can relate to it in some ways. It’s eye-opening to see that others have felt the same way I have, and are able to overcome it 🙂 It’s definitely inspirational in certain aspects. Great post! xoxo

  7. Dennis Haskins who played Mr. Belding is from my hometown of Chattanooga, TN. I see him when he’s in town going to sporting events at our local university where he is a graduate. He is a big deal here, we are blessed to have him as a local.

    Best wishes on your continued recovery. Grace and peace.

  8. Another great blog post as usual 🙂 Whenever anybody is going through a struggle, the worst thing one can do themselves is isolate their problem. This is not the same thing though as wanting to be left alone. When somebody is going through a health crisis, I think the best thing anyone should do aside from a doctor (depending on the case) is to seek your family and friends (If one has any) for comfort. How do I know? People have given me that observation frequently over the years. Anyway, how was Easter? I had a great one and their is a lot of leftovers 🙂 Feels strange that lent has gone by quickly 🙂 Anyway, keep up the great work as always 🙂

    1. Hey thanks John:) you’re right-finding support among family and friends is such a great thing to do in life. It was great! Thanks for asking 🙂 hallelujah for leftovers! I know it was a fast 40 days! Bring on spring! Thanks for stopping by xox

  9. That was awesome and it touched me in many ways. While I never struggled with an eating disorder I have struggled with letting people see the real me. Thanks for the reminder that even Screech was loved. 🙂

  10. You’re so right, and I love that you brought Screech into it. We all can have an endearing side, even when we are most obnoxious. haha. Thank you for sharing your struggles and your determination in recovery. I believe you have and will continue to help so many! 😉 Keep fighting and moving forward!

      1. That is so awesome! I am sure you will do well, and they will probably find you very pleasant to work with and be around. You seem very energetic! I enjoyed this post also and it really enlarges on the reason that God is all about loving your neighbor and forgiving people…because without forgiveness there cannot be love and without love there cannot be relationship and without relationship there can be no community and without community it is impossible to have a fellowship of believers.

      2. Thanks Charlene:) I appreciate that. You’re right! Without forgiveness there cannot be love or relationships or community. What an awesome perspective. Thanks for stopping by. Hugs and love xox

      1. oh good I am so happy you received my comment I didn’t know if it went through my internet hasn’t been running right . Hugs to you too hon.

  11. Another great post, and I hope you don’t get tired of that line because it’s true! Do you remember hyper color sweatshirts??? I want one for my kids. They were so cool!!

    1. Thank you so much! Haha aw you’re kind to say that. I don’t! Sounds amazing though. I’m going to google it right now! I bet my siblings remember though–they were teens in the thick of the nineties. I was just a little kid. But I do remember the sweat suits with my name embroidered across the chest! And of course the side pony! Haha

      1. And a little ace of base: I saw the the sign, as well as the Macarena playing on the boom box while playing with my tomigotchi and furby 😂😂😂

      2. Ace of Base. Holy cheese nips. Remember the sweater song???? …pull this thread as I walk away, AS I WALK AWAY!!! Funny how our mind can imprint what feels like a lifetime within the verses of a song💜

  12. Hurray for Saved by the Bell!! I am so pumped to know this is on Netflix!! And yes to ALL you said. Friends, family and community is SO important. We need people in our lives to encourage us, speak the truth, and show us God’s grace. I’m so happy to hear you are in a season rich with friends.

  13. Love, love this post. You are so blessed to be surrounded by loving family and community, relationships are what it’s all about, yet so often we shut others off. So glad you haven’t. Thanks for sharing your journey. Hugs to you.

  14. Love how you’ve used ‘saved by the bell’ as a set up for this great post. I’ve not had ED but I can totally relate to not being able to connect with others when you are in a mental hurricane. Much love xx

  15. What a great post! Difficult times are much easier to bear when you can share them with true friends who see Christ in you and remind you who you are, who you will be, but more importantly who Christ is in you. I love your blog.

    1. Thank you so much! You’re absolutely right. Loving relationships are so important in life, especially when dealing with difficulties. Thanks for stopping by and for your encouraging words! Hugs and love xox

  16. That’s right! We are wired alright! When we were created by God in His own image, we were wired for God. So when things are right between you and God, everything just falls into place. God bless you again and again and the readers that this blog is helping.

  17. Reminds me so much of how I was like with Anorexia. Not answering the phone, not talking to people, people not giving up but not understanding. Recovery is not always a bed of roses but life in recovery is the best choice I ever made.. I still struggle but I don’t go backwards xxx great post

    1. Hi Daisy, yeah it was a dark time with ED for me for sure. I am so grateful for recovery and for the people that stuck with me. You’re right-not always roses, but always worth it. Love ya warrior☺️ hugs and love xox

  18. Absolutely beautiful! I’m actually in the middle of reading (technically, listening to) the book “Year of Yes” by Shonda Rhimes and trying to see how I would incorporate that mindset into becoming more “friend rich”, as you say. So great that you’ve made it to the other side and appreciate the new found joy. =)

    1. Thank you so much! Oh cool! I had no idea S Rhimes was an author too! I love her Thursday lineup. Wow she’s so talented. Thanks for your encouragement. Glad you stopped by! Hugs and love xox

  19. You are amazing! I love the “friend rich” concept. And it’s not bragging at all. I admire your openness and honesty. I look forward to every post!

  20. Ah, friends of all shapes, sizes, and mediums! Traveling as I do, there isn’t much time at home to meet up and make new friends since we moved to Memphis four years ago. Most of my friendships are by phone, email, and now by blog. I’ve met some great new friends by blogging! There is, of course, you! You continue to be a blessing.

    I also met another reader of yours, Terri on Diary of a Quadriplegic. We’ve been emailing a bit. It turns out she lives in part of my territory. Next time I’m her way, I’m hoping to have time to visit. I feel for her situation and hope to be another source of encouragement for her.

    Thanks for your blog, your courage to recover, and all of the networking your site provides!

    1. Aw thank you Jeffrey. Yes! I am grateful to count you as my friend as well:) how cool! Oh my gosh that absolutely made my day and brings so much joy to my heart. Encouraging is one of your spiritual gifts my friend 🙂 sending hugs and love your way, Jeff! Have a great day! Xox

  21. I *loved* Screech! He’s the type of guy I’ve always gone for-funny, friendly, slightly geeky…overall not afraid to be “different”.

    Thanks for your post…it’s inspiring how you take what had to be a most difficult time in your life and use it to help others. Keep it up!

    Shannon Richey, from my iPhone

    >

  22. I got all excited then… only to discover it’s not on Netflix UK 🙁

    I’m glad to hear things are turning around for you. I hope it continues

  23. I know exactly what you mean, about appreciating what you now have by contrast to how things were before. I can relate this to my own life – different circumstances, but leading to that same sense of feeling overwhelmingly blessed and grateful. 😀❤️

      1. Thank you so much for writing it and sharing with us!

        I really enjoy your voice in Christ, BBB. You encourage me in various ways and I esteem you, beloved–for the demonstrations of perseverance and strength and diligence and joy that you draw from the Lord our God.

        I’ve changes in my personal life that led me away from WP for a stint, but I’m back 🙂

        Blessings abundant to you! Hugs and love right back attcha

  24. Really needed this beautiful post. I was again reminded of my friends for life – friends who share the same faith, beliefs, interests, and are always there for you. I’m really glad you were able to open up and make friends for life, too. God bless 🙂

  25. Happy Easter!!! Love this post! I can appreciate the difference between the relational desert of my eating disorder and the relationship-rich life that I have now. I hope that it will keep getting better! I’m gearing up for a big, international conference at the end of April. Leading up to the same conference last year, I was panicked, because I was only four months out of treatment and heading out into the chaotic world for a week without support was inviting catastrophe. There was no one that I could trust to lean on. Today, there was a bit of stress in the office over the travel arrangements, and I felt my old panic creeping in… Then I remembered how many people will be at the conference that I can lean on for support! It was a wonderful feeling to know that I can trust those relationships, and I’m not alone! So happy for you and your friend rich state of life. You are absolutely right about being made for each other, for shared life and for love and connection. It’s not always easy, it’s often painful, it takes a whole lot of courage and vulnerability, but it is so worth it!!! I’m wishing you a bountiful Easter season!

    1. Hi Lulu! What a beautiful comment. Thank you for sharing this. I’m so glad you’re in a better place this time around. Good luck with the preparation! It sounds exciting! Wow:) but you’re so right- life is so much better when we surround ourselves with people who love and support us. Love ya friend! Hope you’re having a great Easter season as well! Hugs Xoxox

      1. Thank you so much! It’s hard to stay present – I’m always pushing myself so hard to keep moving ahead, but little glimpses back remind me of how capable I am of change and give me hope for the future. It reminds me to trust God! Hugs back! <3

  26. Brilliant. So many ED people should read – but probably won’t as they are caught up still. Wonderful you are out of it! Keeping going now …!

  27. Hi! I stumbled upon your site via palfitness. I think the best episodes were in between Good Morning Mrs. Bliss & The College Years. This is a great post, I found it very insightful & true!

    1. Hi there! Oh o love palfitness! Oh the college years ❤️ hehe yeah it’s fun to watch the miss bliss episodes too because zack is SO YOUNG! Haha thanks for dropping by! Have a great day!

  28. I can,definitely relate to this and thanks for being willing to open about your story. That’s just it; we all have a story of success and failure but by the grace of God, all that is at an end. Time to reap the rewards of NOT giving up!

  29. This is what it means to have true riches…”.to be grateful for the people in your life”…..perhaps we can all learn to be “Struck by the richness and true fullness of life that is the result of community.” Great Article!

  30. Thank you for this. This is where I had the realization where I am in life

    “There are so many reasons we build walls around our hearts. Maybe you feel that you’re unlovable, like I did for a long time. Maybe you find yourself trapped in a mental hurricane of depression, or addiction, or doubt, or jealousy. Maybe you’ve been hurt before, and so opening up your heart is terrifying. Beyond your limitations. You’ve found your comfort zone behind the walls of distance, or busyness, or anger, or silence, or isolation.”

    And your words after that have inspired me to have a new outlook on people. To realize that I need to let others in. And to not let my past haunt my future with my relationships with people.
    Very insightful so thank you for this.

    1. Hi Mandy, oh thank you so much for these kind words. It really means a lot. I’m glad this resonated with you. You’re so right: letting others into that vulnerable place is so incredibly freeing. It truly gives joy to the spirit. Cheesy but so true. Sending hugs and love xox

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