Anorexia & the Sanctity of Human Life

Posted on by beautybeyondbones

I’ll tell you what, you’ve never watched a presidential debate until you’ve watched one in a bar with a bunch of Europeans on the Upper West Side of Manhattan.

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I promise, I’m not getting political…

But let’s just say, they don’t mince words about how they really feel about Trump and Hillary. The term “Satan’s Spawn” was definitely used….and I’ll let you decide who they were referring to.

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ANYWHO.

I sat down to write this post tonight, and I felt like I needed to update you on my date, but honestly, after watching the debate tonight, and everything that has gone on this weekend, from Hurricane Matthew, to the shooting in Chicago, to the political climate, I just felt like…there are more important things to talk about than my love life….

So, to answer that first question, I had a lovely time on my date. Truly. He had me laughing the entire time, which I fully appreciate. Kind. Smart. Handsome. There will be a second date.

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And thank you to everyone “rooting” for me on the big night. Honest to goodness, it meant so much. 🙂

OK.

Now onto the important stuff.

I’m going to publish a post that I’ve had in my drafts for – literally 9 months. I haven’t worked up the courage to publish it…until now.

I thought it timely to discuss something that has been on my heart for a long time.

Part of the reason why I have been hesitant to write this is because I don’t want to offend anyone. Especially since it is election season, discussing “hot button issues” is always a recipe to rustle a few feathers.

But anywho…the Good Lord knows I haven’t minced words up until now, so this won’t be any different.

I am pro-life.

And here’s why:

During my adolescence, for a good two years, I had severe anorexia. You know this.

Although I never would have said, “I’m trying destroy my life,” I was doing just that. Compulsively exercising, barely eating, and lying about the whole bit, I wasted away to a mere 78 pounds as an 18 year old female. I was on death’s doorstep.

And though I would have never said, “I’m choosing to die,” my actions communicated otherwise.

Healing from an eating disorder is no small feat. The weight loss is merely a symptom of an internal battle being waged. And in order to overcome and heal, you have to get to the root of the internal issue. You’ve got to identify The Lie. And it’s different for everyone.

For me, I believed The Lie that I was not worth love. That the only way I was worthy of love was if I were perfect. Seems so trivial, but I believed it to my core. Enough to nearly die for.

And in order to heal, I had to replace that Lie with the Truth.

Which is this: I have worth because I am a child of God. 

I am made by the King: His precious daughter. And because of this fact (which I did nothing to earn) I have incomprehensible worth. My life has immeasurable worth.

The hardest thing for me to accept, was that my worth had nothing to do with my achievements. It wasn’t influenced by anything I did or won. Read: I didn’t have to be perfect. Which, frankly was a hard pill to swallow. Because I wanted it to be. I wanted to earn love and worth. That’s what I had grown up with in a family of overachievers. We earned success and the opportunities we had. But this was not the case with God.


And conversely, my worth and value was not decreased because of any shortcomings. I have a lot of “dirty laundry” and a past full of secrecy and lies associated with the disease. Hello — it was anorexia for pete’s sake. But even that had no effect on my worth as a human being.

I was made by God. His fingerprints are on me. And he loves me unconditionally.

And He proved my worth when He chose the cross.

That fact saved my life. It made me choose life. Choose recovery. Choose to live.

So how, then, can I not extend that truth to others? To the child in the womb? To the elderly on their deathbed? To the disabled or homeless? If I had worth at my 78 pound, emaciated shell of existence, simply because I was created by God, then so too, do all those other souls.

So too, do they. The only difference is that the unborn child, the elderly woman with dementia, the child with a disability that has left him unable to speak: those children of God are unable to use their voice to stand up for their worth as sons and daughters of our Creator.

So I must.

Human life is not disposable. And the only reason I have the authority to say that is because I nearly threw mine away. I took the gift that was my life, and abused it, despised it, spat on it, and pillaged any and all hope. So only having nearly lost it, do I now know how truly precious it is.


That is all.

I’m not going to try to change your minds or try and bash you over the head with statistics and figures about the unimaginable number of children lost to abortion in the United States since Roe v. Wade (58.6 million).

I’m just here to tell my story. And to tell how the only reason I’m standing here today is because knowing my worth in Christ made me choose life.

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BBB: Because we're all recovering from something. // For speaking/business inquiries: beautybeyondbones@yahoo.com

413 thoughts on “Anorexia & the Sanctity of Human Life”

  1. Most of the pro-life folks I’ve heard from don’t actually possess the authority to back to their position. You have it. That’s all I can really say. I’m glad you enjoyed your date and your experience watching the debate sounds way more interesting than mine. 😂 It’ll never cease to amaze me how good politicians are at talking around questions.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Perfect! You do matter, as does every precious soul. It is hard to replace those lies we’ve believed for so long with His truth. God bless and thank you for sharing. There is healing for wounded hearts. 💜

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Thank you for your amazing testimony! I too was able to recover from a dangerous eating disorder and one that threatned to take everything from me. God has made himself know to me and let me know he has other plans for me. Our suffering was not in vain and I thank you for sharing! I pray for the many who need Him, who is our only savior in these dark times.

    Liked by 2 people

      1. Thanks!! Feel free to check out my stuff. I didn’t suffer from an eating disorder, but I do struggle with mental illness and chronic illness so there might be some things we can relate on. I’m glad you overcame your anorexia, it’s a terrible, debilitating disease. xoxo

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  9. Great post. From the heart and quite fearless given the present atmosphere of correctness in which we find ourselves. Funny a person never had to defend the Truth with the truths of humanity. But I guess that may have something to do with carrying your cross. You write so well. Thanks for sharing.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. You have wonderful insight! I am glad you chose life and have also shared this journey with others. I have close family members who struggle with addiction. My sweet nephew has been in and
    out of jail for drug charges. It is so sad he cannot see his worth. Please add him to your prayers. May God continue to bless you and others through your sharing!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much Teresa! I am so grateful for the healing I received and new life! I will definitely keep him and his family in my thoughts and prayers. Thank you for the encouragement! Hugs and love xox

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  12. It’s a great post, no matter what side you take. Obviously those of us who follow, read and comment here at what I call my regular Monday and Thursday blog programming are very glad you chose YOU and chose life.

    There was a joke that popped into my irreverent brain while reading this…let’s just say it had something to do with nine months and the birth (read: posting) of this…I’d tell that joke but it doesn’t really seem to fit…maybe in another forum (no it’s not dirty!!!)

    In other comment thoughts…congrats on the date and count me among the throng rooting for you!

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Kudos to you, young lady. Indeed, to witness to the Truth is to cherish an exhilarating life-changing and undeniably divine experience… one that is unbelievably and incredibly liberating from a spiritual point of view. A sincere thank you for having the courage self-esteem and confidence to attempt to positively influence others toward the path of righteousness Holiness truthfulness that is Jesus Christ, My Savior and yours. Peace to you. My heart dances with Joy at the thought of Every Soul saved… And to close with a Twist on one of my favorite quotes; Be the Light you wish to see in the world.
    -Michael

    Liked by 1 person

  14. You have shared a powerful post and a perspective few of us could ever have regarding your illness and recovery! There are times on my blog when I write about being a voice for the voiceless. We have so many children in foster care who may never have a loving family. When we choose life, let us pray for those children too and a better life for them and to raise adoption awareness! Thank you for sharing your walk of faith!

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Thank you for this post.

    The U.S. is an odd place to support abortion because we have historically been a labor-deficient country–automation took off here a long time before anywhere else–just ask Alexis de Tocqueville (I am still a recovering economist). The U.S. has almost always supported open immigration (think Hillary, not Trump) for just that reason. In some sense, undocumented workers from Central American simply make up for the kids that Americans aborted over the past 30 years. When I think about it, I remember that when I worked construction in college (early 1970s), my co-workers were mostly poor, white guys mostly from Appalachia.

    Your arguments from the first person for why we should support the unborn are compelling. Because we are created in the image of God, our lives have intrinsic value, which do not change like market values with changes in the economy or with the inconveniences to others. The same arguments speak against euthanasia, another scourge on our society.

    Thanks. Stephen

    Liked by 1 person

  18. All I can say is AMEN!!! To me the greatest sin in this nation is killing these babies! A baby is the most helpless creation of God when it is born, and certainly is the most helpless in the womb. I saw a quote the other day which said, “If it is your body, then why aren’t you the one dying?” Kind of said it all to me.

    Glad to see SOMEONE in your generation finally speaking out against this. Love and God Bless, SR

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Girl, I always “got your back!” 🙂 I am from TEXAS so when I say “you have a back protector,” YOU GOT ONE!!! 🙂

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  19. Thank you for your courage. It gave me the courage to finally comment here. I love reading all your posts, but I get shy about commenting…anyway, absolutely appreciate your words here and wholeheartedly agree. We are His handiwork from the very start. When we embrace that truth, beautiful things can happen. Bless you.

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  21. You are strong, and you are doing great, please don’t change. Also, politics is dirty business. I’m losing subscribers because of it, but it matters not. It’s all about what you stand for. Fight for what you believe in, and always have your defenses ready.

    Like

  22. Ok i actually cannot thank you enough for this. I have recently been struggling a TON with the eating disorder acting up again, my team wanting me to go to a higher level of care, just feeling very hopeless.
    ANYWAYS where i was going with this hahaha-
    “And in order to overcome and heal, you have to get to the root of the internal issue. You’ve got to identify The Lie. And it’s different for everyone.

    For me, I believed The Lie that I was not worth love. That the only way I was worthy of love was if I were perfect. Seems so trivial, but I believed it to my core. Enough to nearly die for.”
    THIS. THIS IS ME. THANK YOU FOR HELPNIG ME REALIZE THIS. this has been the main trigger for me these past few months and i have been unable to put it into words. So thank you for helping me put the pieces together, for helping me realize what is triggering these disordered thoughts, that giving into the eating disorder will not help this problem.

    ok i’ll get off my soapbox and go back to binge reading your whole blog 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much Madelyn! Wow what an awesome reflection. It seriously warms my heart that this helped you. Girl, you got this. I so believe in you and am cheering you on in your recovery! Letting go of perfection was difficult, but honestly, it brings so much peace and joy and life…and FUN! Seriously life is FUN now that I’m not burdened by the stress and agony of perfection. You so got this girl. Sending the biggest hugs in the whole wide world:)

      Liked by 1 person

  23. So beautiful to share your stance on this difficult issue and connecting it to your personal story. Great job!! I will definitely be sharing this for my other pro-life friends to read! ❤

    Like

  26. I know I’ve already said it once but literally I tell ever person (especially girls) I know to read your stuff. Your honesty, truthfulness, and knowledge of God’s love is huge. I can’t tell you enough how thankful I am that you open your life to others because so many people wrestle with the issues you do. It is a blessing to point them your direction so they know they are not alone and are deeply loved.

    Like

  27. Congrats on the date. Thank you for finding this issue worth the risk that comes from being honest in our culture. Being prolife is the ultimate sign of compassion, and proves the ultimate desire for equality. No matter a persons race, religion, nationality, or disability those who are prolife see the inherent value in them all. Even those who disagree are precious beings created for God’s glory. God bless you!

    Liked by 1 person

  29. Wishing I could applaud you! Beautifully written and expressed. Yes life is precious! I had a NDE which showed me how life is God because He has created all. I am so proud of your courage! ❤

    Like

      1. PS You get a serious amount of comments. Good grief I thought I had a lot! Good for you!! Not easy some days to answer them …. Keep touching Hearts and Souls!! Your Light is beautiful! ❤

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  30. You are a beautiful person. I do not know the same struggle as what you’ve had, but I appreciate your willingness to share your story! To God be all the glory!

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  31. Interesting comments. Europeans seem to be dumbfounded by our current menu–but they’ve got Boris Johnson who’s been described as the UK’s Trump. (And they’ve got far worse outside the UK!)

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  32. Thank you so much for sharing and not being afraid to openly profess that you’re pro-life. I am too, as I believe that the life God has blessed each of us with is precious. Abortion is such a horrible thing – these unborn babies could’ve been faithful followers of Christ, but instead are brutally pushed away as the price of human desire. It’s just terrible.

    Another amazing post Caralyn – God bless! 🙂 ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  34. Don’t worry too much about offending people… in order to make your mark on the world you have to occasionally say things that some people won’t agree with. Only cowards would hate you for your opinion. The people who love you will continue to read your heartfelt blog posts regardless of what you believe.

    Case in point, I’m a pro-choice atheist. I disagree with a great deal of what you say, but the emotion behind what you write keeps me here and inspires me.

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    1. Hey Palomar, thank you so much for this:) you’re right-we each need to hold true to what we believe. It seriously means so much that you read my blog:) I’m so glad you enjoy reading my posts! Sending massive hugs and love xox

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  35. Just so you know: “I was made by God. His fingerprints are on me.” is such a beautiful thought. I just love that so much.

    I’m glad your date turned out so well. You rock on, girl! 😀

    And just so you know, I’m so glad that anorexia didn’t claim you. If it had, I never would have known you. And all of the wonderful, inspirational posts that you have written would have gone unwritten.

    May God bless you always. 😀

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  37. This is a great piece! You know I always try to give you something back besides “Good Job!” This time, I’m afraid I’ll have to settle for that. Everything I’ve ever thought of, but said a lot better! Congratulations on continuing to grow your courage! I’m glad your date went well. I’m sure it feels good to make that connection!

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      1. Thank you for your kind words! You have no idea how much I needed to hear that just this evening. Sometimes this job feels so meaningless, and I wonder if am doing anything worthwhile. I’m so glad to know I’ve been of some help to you! Thanks for giving me that tonight!

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  40. I love how you just effortlessly make me cry simply by having the courage to be honest. I agree completely: I try to avoid “political” topics as well because I’ve been taught that, when preaching, as soon as politics is mentioned you lost half the congregation. I too am prolife for the same reason you are: I tried to drink myself to death because I was sure that I wasn’t worthy of love and would therefore never find it. You’re a remarkable woman and I’m praying for the best for you in the years to come! God bless, Rich.

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  43. Once again–Inspirational.

    This is certainly a hot button issue, and you discussed with thoughtfulness and grace. Something that is difficult for myself to do when talking about this with others who disagree with me, but that’s because I get too passionate about this topic. One thing that drives me is the pain God feels when a baby’s life is ended before it’s had the chance to be born. Or even the pain God feels when a full grown adult decides to end their life for one reason or another. There two songs that come to mind:

    Whispers in the Dark and Last Night, both by Skillet.

    Both speak of the pain people feel when there is no hope to be found and God feels that pain, He knows that pain, and it pains Him anytime a life is ended before He’s had a chance to give them the love they are looking for.

    You came to find that love, and it motivated you to overcome the darkness in your life, and something even more beautiful came out of that–you became motivated to help others find that love to overcome that darkness in their own lives!!

    Press on Caralyn, God created you to be a shining city on a hill for people to look to and know God like you do!

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    1. Thank you so much Tom. I really appreciate your encouraging words. I’ll have to look those songs up because I’m not familiar with either. But it sounds like they’re really powerful. God is good! Hugs and love xox

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  49. If I was not happily married and 30 years younger…just sayin…
    The guy that gets to put a ring on your finger one day will be one lucky dude. Wait for the right one. You are amazing!

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  50. I appreciate your post. I am also saddened by abortion, and wish it did not happen. However, we have to look at the root causes of abortion, poverty being one of the biggest ones. Married women get more abortions than single ones. Abortion is down in the west (in the US for example) but it remains high in developing countries. If we truly want to be pro-life, we have to look at why people are getting abortions. Sometimes, it is because they cannot afford another child.

    Incidentally, making abortion illegal does not reduce the amount of abortions that happen, according to research. So I think Christians should focus a bit more on supporting those who are vulnerable to making the choice to abort in their own country (spend time at preg care centers, volunteer there and with at-risk populations) and also put time, energy and prayer into eradicating poverty here and in the developing world.

    I am pro-life, not only on this issue, but on others (death penalty, for one) as well. As Christians, let us remember that pro-life does not only apply to abortion. Gun reform, climate change, prison reform… all of these issues relate to the sanctity of life and and the importance of protecting it (and the world God made).

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    1. Hi Laura! Thank you so much for this comment. I love this perspective and insight. Very powerful and definitely offers some food for thought. Great point. Thanks for sharing your heart:) Hugs and love xox

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