I did something really fun last weekend. Something that was a new New York experience for me.
And I’m not talking about standing in line at the break of dawn for SNL tickets – although I can check that off my bucket list as of earlier this month.
And I’m also not talking about discovering a hidden Chinatown speakeasy, where the mixologists use ingredients such as lavender infused vodka and fresh pressed kale juice.
Nope. Been there three times in fact.
No, last weekend, I went up to Harlem and saw a Christmas show at the Apollo.
And it may or may not have been a date with a gentleman. A gentleman I may or may not have met at a candlelight Christmas concert at church.
But wow. What an afternoon. I had no idea what to expect. Set the bar low. Little did I know that I was about to be moved to tears watching a show about the beauty and power of Christmas.
In fact, sitting here in the airport at O’Dark Thirty, waiting to fly home to Ohio and reflecting on the show, I’m realizing how incredibly familiar the story is to me personally, and how – it actually was like looking in the mirror.
Long story short, this woman returns to her Harlem brownstone, ready to sell the place after her parents passed away. The musical was her reliving her childhood memories. How her baby sister passed away in that house, and for the rest of her life, her parents struggled to move past the pain.
In the end, our protagonist opts not to sell the brownstone, because although there was pain in that house, there was also love. And realized that she could always go home. That even though that tragedy rocked their world as a family, eventually it brought them closer together and closer to God. She had finally made peace with her painful past, and embraced her home and where she came from.
I saw so much of my story in this show. And, if you take a long enough look at it, perhaps you can too.
I’ve talked to enough of you in the comments section to know that, we all have things in our history – or a loved one’s history – that is painful. That haunts us. Weighs heavily on our spirits, especially during the holidays, when family and faith and togetherness are front and center.
Home, if we’re honest, can sometimes not be the ideallic, twinkle-light encrusted, issue-free house that is depicted in Hallmark Christmas Movies.
It’s taken me a long time to get to where I am today – where home is no longer that bleak reminder of a broken girl, broken dreams and broken relationships.
Living through anorexia, as a family, takes a toll.
But home is more than just that one season of life.
Home is your family. Home is the look between brother and sister, knowing how much he believes in you. Home is a hug from your father, wordlessly expressing his love. Home is the tender conversation with your mother. The dance party with your neice.
Home is not just a place. But a living, breathing experience with the people you love, and who love you.
And even though the past may not be perfect, there is beauty in the coming toghether of everyone, in that same place, choosing to live and love in the now.
That’s what we can choose to embrace.
It’s there that we can find peace.
@beauty.beyond.bones – Instagram
Thank you for considering supporting BBB on Patreon! You make this blog possible