Dear Beyoncé,

Posted on by beautybeyondbones

There’s something really beautiful about humility.

I’ve been kind of on a pop culture “fast” recently. Not by choice…

Ever since my mom had her stroke over Christmas, we literally haven’t turned on the TV. Which is crazy, considering how glued I was to the news during the election.

But for whatever reason, tonight my parents and I decided to watch the Grammy’s.

And that may or may not have been because I thought the Biebs was performing 🙂

But I digress.

Going into the night, I had obviously heard about Beyoncé‘s attention-grabbing nude pregnancy photo shoot, but to be honest, I have so many (more important) things to occupy my time right now.

But her Grammy’s performance…..daaaaaang.

I honestly had to take a moment to collect myself afterwards.

And not because I was so moved by her “brilliance.”


I needed to just get away from the sheer glorification of self we collectively had to witness.

Now, let me begin by saying this: I have nothing against the Queen Bey. I love her music. But I’ve always said, “I don’t worship at her altar.” – Kind of half-kidding.


But tonight….that was actually literally accurate, as Beyoncé was adorned and bedecked in a full on personification of a cross between a Hindu goddess and the blessed Virgin Mary, complete with a golden, saintly crown (that was eerily similar to a monstrance.)


My dad watched 30 seconds and said, “This is making a mockery of religion,” as he got up and left the room.

But that’s for another post. I’m not even going to go into that tonight.

What irked me about the performance was that she chose to portray herself as a literal deity.

Since being home with my mom, I’ve been spending, literally, every waking hour with her – from 6am until I pass out at 11pm. (That is, unless I’m up until 1am writing a post!)

But I’ve been my mom’s “wingwoman” – attending all of her bible studies and book clubs and social gatherings with her.

And Friday morning, we were at book club, and the book was The Hidden Power of Kindness.

And uncannily, the chapter they were on was on caring for the sick.

I kid you. Frickin. Not.


But there was a powerful line in the book that said, “Sickness makes people more humble.”

Beyoncé’s performance tonight, it was all about motherhood, as she just announced last week that she was expecting twins.

So this performance was a celebration of womanhood and specifically, motherhood – and elevating herself to goddess-status because of her pregnancy state.

But I’m here to tell you – what I’ve learned from my own mother in this season helping her recover from her stroke, is that the most powerful “glorification of motherhood” is when she is the most meek and humble.

In fact, the best exemplification and celebration of mothers would never be the glorification and deification of self, but rather, humbling oneself and serving and loving others.

Seeing my mom, in this vulnerable state, she has never been more beautiful to me. Ever.

All her life, she has never asked to be “adored” or “worshiped” because of her status as “mother.” In fact, just the opposite. She has always sought to give of herself to others. And even now, when she can’t really do that at the moment, that humility makes her all the more beautiful and lovable.


There was just such a stark contrast between seeing Beyoncé, adorned in a golden halo crown and dressed as a deity, glorifying herself because she’s a mother and a woman; and then looking over at my beautiful mother, fighting for her life to regain her memory and her speech after her stroke. That woman, is worthy of all the praise in the world, and yet would never ask for it, nor covet it.

I’m not bashing Beyoncé. Truly, I’m not. She’s talented and I’m sure, a terrific mother to Blue, and the babies in her belly. This is not meant to be a judgment on that. It is merely an observation.

Looking at my mother tonight, on the couch, concentrating on absorbing the sights and sounds coming at her from the TV, – she was absolutely radiant, giving Beyoncé a run for her money.

There’s something really beautiful about humility.

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BBB: Because we're all recovering from something. // For speaking/business inquiries: beautybeyondbones@yahoo.com

493 thoughts on “Dear Beyoncé,”

  1. This is really interesting to me because I heard that Adele was super humble (but I can’t confirm because I didn’t watch.) I think everyone reacts to fame differently. I’m sorry that you (?) felt offended by what she wore. It’s a little sad how mainstream it’s become to bash on religion. I’m just like let people believe in what they believe! If they want to worship a rock, let them! If they want to worship God, let them! (I don’t want to be THAT person but you spelled deity wrong.)

    At any rate, I wish you and your family the best during your mum’s recovery. Godspeed to her.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for this! You’re right, everyone responds to fame different. Yeah, Adele was really humble. I wasn’t really offended, just more taken aback and like…”wow.” Yeah, I definitely don’t expect pop culture to respect or have anything to do with religion, but this was just a little extreme. Oh oops! haha I’ll go in and spellcheck! haha that’s my 1am brain for ya 🙂 thanks so much, my beautiful friend! I always love hearing your thoughts!! 🙂 hugs xox

      Liked by 2 people

  4. Beautifully put – I have been trying to put words to my thoughts about the pictures I have seen (I didn’t watch the Grammy’s). I am not one to take offense to a lot of things, and I love culturally ethnic art. However, I agree with your dad, and I was so disappointed to see the embrace of ethnicity take a turn toward deification.

    And, I did NOT think about the Monstrance on her head until I saw a meme floating around about it today (something about Jesus wearing it better).

    Finally, such a beautiful reminder that motherhood is most beautiful when it is raw, humble, and real. Thank you for that reminder!

    Liked by 4 people

  7. I can’t remember the last time I watched any of these award shows. It’s one thing to like an artist’s music and another thing entirely to worship celebrities with a devotion best reserved for God.

    Not that all of these artists expect this, but being only human, when you pay that much attention to a person, it’s not only possible, but highly likely they will start eating it up with a spoon and then expecting it.

    As I’ve gotten older, I have less and less respect for that sort of human being. Maintaining the ability to express humility must be a tremendous effort for anyone in that position, so my hat’s off to those who do. For those who don’t, I don’t care how much money they make. Neither does God.

    Liked by 4 people

  8. I wasn’t as offended by the Beyonce performance, but I rarely look to entertainers for moral insight or guidance (didn’t quite understand the sexualized imagery on Beyonce’s Instagram?) but your mother would seem to represent the true power of a person whose legacy has clearly impacted your very being, I am humbled by that. Thank you for sharing such profound truth.

    Liked by 2 people

  9. ” The hidden power of kindness ” ….when I read this line, I think of you! Thank you for sharing this part of your journey….we can’t know why now, but we can trust God has you there not only for an immediate purpose of daily care and companionship but for a foundation of something later in your life! It might be years before God reveals this to you and when he does you will have another chapter of your testimony. This one will be powerful and touch many hearts! I am so proud of you and would like to thank you for being an inspiration and in my life!

    Liked by 2 people

  10. No better words could have been spoken. I was so shocked to see those women “on the ground at Beyonce’s feet like she was the virgin mary or a deity of some religion to be worshipped. It almost brought to mind the woman in Revelations that was giving birth. The great harlot. That was all I could think in the back of my mind. I hate to think that but that was all I could think as I watched her draw all that attention to herself as she cradled her stomach as if she were the ONLY woman in the world to EVER carry twins. It is a sad state of our country when girls look up to idols not God. Thank you for this moving post. God bless you for caring for your mom. It is not easy I bet, but you are doing what a daughter should, and God will place jewels in your crown for it. I bet your mom is grateful and feels more comfort with you helping her and is at more peace at home. She is blessed to have you!! I will keep you all in my prayers. 🙂 God bless you!

    Liked by 4 people

    1. Thank you so much Tina. Yeah, it was pretty outrageous. We looked at each other and were like, is this really happening?! Thanks for sharing your thoughts! I’m glad this resonated with you. My mom is pretty awesome. thanks for your prayers. means a lot! hugs xox

      Liked by 1 person

  11. As usual, your posts captivate me 🙂 I didn’t watch the Grammy’s. As a matter of fact, we don’t watch television at all, ever, lol. Just out choice.

    At any rate, first of all the “thing” that woman was wearing reminded me of the Starbucks woman/brand or whatever it is (which is supposedly suppose to be a fertility goddess of something related to the sun – you see how much I know lol) which came off as a passive political statement. Secondly, if I were pregnant I would DARE NOT act like that. It was a shame, and again, I only saw pictures, but it seems you hit the nail on the head. What is this world coming to?!

    On an ending note, I just want to let you know that your family is in my prayers. Your mother, that her recovery be speedy and complete and for you, that you are blessed beyond measure in your devotion to her, as I’m sure you will be ❤

    Liked by 5 people

    1. aw, thank you so much! gosh, what a kind thing to say. How powerful that you are TV free! I wish I could do that 🙂 haha Yeah, I’m with you – that was brave to bare a pregnant belly – of twins no less! – on national television. Thanks for your prayers. it really means a lot. hugs to you xox

      Liked by 1 person

  12. Hi Caralyn…you are way more gracious than I am. I cannot stand what I consider nauseating self-glorification of celebrities. As I read your blog, the words of Jesus to the Pharisees came to mind immediately, “He said to them, “You are the ones who justify yourselves in the eyes of others, but God knows your hearts. What people value highly is detestable in God’s sight.” (Luke 16:15). The last statement is a zinger…the value systems of the world often run crosshairs with God’s heart. I believe the beauty that you saw in your mother is the same beauty the Christ is drawn towards. Humility is beautiful in the eyes of God…I believe He was giving you a view through His lens. “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” (James 4:6). I am not anti-entertainment or celebrity, far from it, but I believe the self-aggrandizement of this age borders on idolatry. I love the promise of Jesus as He reveals His heart…“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” The Lord Himself is humble and He loves the humble heart! Okay…I’m done…sorry for the rant…ya got me going there sister!
    Tom

    Liked by 5 people

  14. I think you did a beautiful job of expressing yourself, and your feelings without bashing anyone. Of course Beyoncé is an entertainer, and she really knows how to give us something to watch and talk about. I would like to think her performance was done strictly in that spirit.
    Regardless, it’s a wonderful gift you have, the ability to see the true and real and raw and sometimes painful beauty God shares with us in so many different ways every day. God bless you and your family.

    Liked by 3 people

  15. I agree with your dad. I couldn’t watch. As I don’t know her intentions, I’ll give the benefit of the doubt. I’m guessing she was trying to portray empowerment to all women. Her performance fell short and didn’t remotely come off that way.

    Liked by 4 people

  16. I pray that Beyonce’ and scores of other “stars” and “celebrities” learn humility. The powerful experience of the 12 Steps helped me. Also the Most Holy Rosary of the Blessed Virgin Mary. Praying the Rosary teaches me the power of losing my self in devotion to the Blessed Mother. I love your posts. Prayers and a hug to your Mother and your Dad!

    Liked by 2 people

  17. I had a similar reaction to her performance. It was puzzling to me. I completely did not get it. And what I really don’t get is that sometimes her music alludes to infidelity on the part of her husband. I heard it in the song last night too (in my perspective). She was talking about being split open in a painful way. Child rearing can do that, so I don’t know. Call me puzzled. I hope one day my son has an ounce of the love that you do for your mom.

    Liked by 2 people

  19. Her performance leads me to think of a quote that I love, “arrogance and fear, they will keep you from learning the simplest thing, it’s not about you.” I think that many, especially celebrities and those in the spotlight are praised by so many that it goes to their heads and humble goes out the window. Kanye West jumped on stage and embarrassed Taylor Swift to say Beyonce should have won, and Adele turned down her well deserved award because she felt that Beyonce should gave gotten album of the year. I don’t recall Beyonce ever giving up her spot and putting any other celebrity on the high pedestal that they put her on. Her performance really creeped me out and I felt like she considered herself worthy of worship. No Ma’am!! I do not worship man.

    Liked by 4 people

    1. Oh wow, what a powerful quote. I’ve never heard that before but it’s so true – arrogance and fear … has destroyed many lives. Thanks for your thoughtful response. Amen to that! No Ma’am indeed! Hope you’re having a great night! hugs xox

      Liked by 2 people

  20. There is nothing more attractive than seeing someone being humble. It’s a practiced characteristic that makes one put others first. Something you’re really good at! Keep up the good work! Always praying for you and your family!

    ~Tom

    Liked by 3 people

  22. Sing it, sweeheart. You’re still doing exactly what you are meant to be doing… revealing God truth right where you stand.

    Humility is a virtue/gift much more precious than fame or success because, without humility, one has a difficult time being aware of God.

    Liked by 3 people

  23. What more could we expect from the children of Eve? [Insert melancholic you-know-you’re-right-but-it-really-sucks smile here] The saddest part of Eve’s story was she was already made in Father’s image, she was already just like her Papa, and it wasn’t her downfall to want to be like him but she got tricked into believing she had to do more. And it hasn’t stopped.
    Thank-you for your insight Caralyn, as always (: You are very discerning and while it’s not easy to see your world for what it is, it is a valuable gift [=

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thanks Carson. That’s so true – she was already in His image. That’s a powerful thought. Yeah, we definitely are the product of a fallen world. That’s why community is so important to navigate through it with. Hope you’re having a great week so far. Hugs xox

      Liked by 1 person

  25. This moved me. Not because of the Beyoncé stuff perse but rather the light you shown on your mother. As a mother myself I can only pray that my children would see me in the same way you see your mom (and only if I’m worthy… I hope I am). That I have enough humility in my service to them in this life. Once again I find myself wondering if I’m saying it right what exactly it is that I mean–this one’s hard to express I think. I know you don’t want to be held to a standard of nobility for the care you are giving your mom right now, but I think kind of the point is that you having the emotional capacity to do with grace and strength brightens your moms aura even more- she raised you. She brought all of the beauty in your bones out from within, nurturing –so you shine bringer too in part Because of her influence in your life. Gifts to each other you are. Special hearts with special gifts to give because it is natural to do it. God bless you both for looking up to Him in faith for strength. ❤️

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you so much. Yeah my mother is pretty incredible. I am very blessed to have her in my life. And gosh – no no, I’m just doing what needs to be done. I definitely think our hearts are connected in a special way though:) thanks so much for stopping by. Hugs and love xox

      Liked by 1 person

  26. Thank you for your honest appraisal of a pop culture moment and the generosity of spirit that comes through in caring for your mother. Blessings to you and your parents.

    Liked by 1 person

  28. So beautifully written. I didn’t watch the Grammy’s, but I’m so glad that you’re seeing the beauty in your Mother. Sounds like you’re doing much better. Thank you so much for your kind words yesterday. They meant a lot. ❤️❤️❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  32. A thought provoking essay, as always!

    I liked Beyonce’s performance. I didn’t find it religiously offensive, and I enjoyed the way she played with feminine, pregnant ideas of the Divine. (And, for what it’s worth, my first thought was of Isis, not the Virgin Mary or Durga or Lakshmi, etc.–though I assume she borrowed from lots of different traditions.).

    Also, I don’t think Beyonce’s performance took anything away from your mother. Reading this, I feel as if you felt she somehow insulted the kindness, patience and heroism of women like your mom. I didn’t get that vibe at all. To me, Beyonce just put on a dazzling, body-positive show. A show that in no way negated quieter expressions of motherhood.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hey Jenn! Thank you so much for this awesome perspective! I always love hearing your thoughts. Yeah, it was definitely a great production. she’s uber talented and that really showed last night. I guess I wasn’t offended, as much as I was just struck by the juxtaposition between these two women at that moment in time — beyonce on our tv, and my mother sitting in the same room, and just how both, in their own way were celebrating motherhood. I guess, my bias came out as to which I preferred 🙂 hehe But thanks so much for sharing this! i love to hear different points of view! after all, isn’t that the point of art?! 🙂 have a great night! hugs xox

      Liked by 1 person

  33. Glad you addressed this. I too think she is a great entertainer but she is by no means a deity, and I feel like that performance made her out to be one. She is an entertainer, not a god. She stands on a stage, not an altar.

    Liked by 2 people

  37. I see a lot of judging here by people. Observations she should be humble, and the only way to show the glorification of motherhood is by humility and meekness. It really isn’t anybody’s place to lay judgment.

    I just think people might want to reread Matthew 7 again and think about it before talking about whether she represents motherhood well or not.

    It isn’t anyone else’s place to do that.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi there! Thanks for this perspective. I definitely didn’t mean to come across judgey – that was 100% not my intention. I was just struck by the juxtaposition of the two celebrations of motherhood – one on tv by beyonce, and the other by my mother (without her knowing) in her humble state. I wasn’t really trying to suggest that one is any ‘better’ of a mother than the other, just pointing out the contrast. I’m sorry if this offended you. That was definitely not my intent. I will definitely go back and read Matthew 7 🙂 Thanks for sharing your heart and your point of view! hugs xox

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Honestly it wasn’t you specifically I was referring to. I saw where you were going and I am sure nothing was meant. The problem I had is watching the comments become an echo chamber getting more and more judgmental as people post.

        I saw less and less love and understanding and more and more preaching from the comments. This is not just here, most churches do this too so it isn’t something unexpected.

        It wasn’t meant for you as the reason or my comment.

        Like

      2. Ok, thanks 🙂 Yeah, I definitely tried to craft the post in as non-judgemental of a position as possible while still expressing my point of view. Goodness knows I have a laundry list about 3 miles long of things I need to work on, so who am I to throw a stone!? haha #butseriously 🙂 Hope you have a great Monday evening! much love to you xox

        Like

  38. Your post got to me BBB! As you were talking about sickness making you humble. I have a sickness of sin. 100% chance of death. I wonder if this is the reminder that God gave us that he made us of dust. We are to be mindful of this fact. The result of being mindful, no matter how healthy I am I still have the disease, still made of dust, as I remember this it should help make me humble now, today Similar to your mom.

    As my anger and hatred for all sicknesses and death become more focused, I find I feel more foreign here than I ever have. Yet, the more foreign I become the more tender I become to all the folks around me no matter what they feel or think about God. Yes, I still falter at times with my love toward other people. But now faltering for long moments. Not choosing to live in indifference to others continuously. Just changing with out notice unless others share and provoke a realization of what God has done in a mere mortal. Thanks for the post BBB,, what do you think?

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Hey Denny! Thank you so much for your kind words and thoughtful reflection. Amen to that — I have that sickness too! haha You’re right though, we should try to remember that we’re dust. It’s a good reminder of Who is calling the shots. Thanks for stopping by and sharing your thoughts! hugs xox

      Liked by 1 person

  39. Self-glorification has always been such a turn-off to me. And I have never enjoyed Beyonce’s crass and vulgar lyrics. She has such an incredible set of pipes–would love to see humility back it up, which really is something deeply beautiful to see.

    Liked by 1 person

  40. Love your heart, as per usual. Love your post, also as per usual. I am a mother of two and husband of one (one is more than enough lol) and I feel most blessed when serving my family. I do not want credit for that, I want them to feel blessed by my taking care of them. I want God to get the credit for He gives me strength. I am incredibly strong in every way, but that has nothing to do with me, all to do with God and His grace. He has chosen to bless me with strength. Those who glorify themselves really limit their horizons, they can only rise to their own pride level. Those who humble themselves and glorify God, He will lift them up stronger at each turn. Knowing is half the battle. Killing the pride is quite a different matter. lol 🙂 Love you, beautiful! Doing great with momma. XOXOXO!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. thank you so much Tonya. I really appreciate your kind words! What a beautiful heart you have for your family. That is so lovely. Amen to that – Christ holds us up and gives us strength! Thanks for your encouragement. This brightened my day 🙂 hugs xox

      Liked by 1 person

  43. I’m sure that Beyonce’s daughter and future babies will look at her in the performance the same way that you admire and love your mother for her strength and beauty.

    Women are too often asked to be humble and gracious and play small. For what? Every woman is special and beautiful and motherhood is universal. Her performance was elaborate but it was a performance. If you follow Beyoncé, in her Lemonade film/album (released in April 2016) there is a line that says “God is God, and I am not.”

    Also Beyoncé was inspired by the Yoruba Goddess Oshun. She is a west African goddess of fertility.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Thank you so much, Sonique, for this perspective. I did not know that about her inspiration. That’s very interesting. And that’s a great line from her album. I didn’t know that. You’re right – we aren’t called to play small. Thanks so much for this great food for thought. big hugs xox

      Like

  44. Beyonce’ is good but both you and your mom are both BEAUTY BEYOND BEYONCE’!! Biggest hugs to both of you!!! Happy Valentines to both of you and I’m so happy you are both together to share your love for life!!

    Like

  45. Terrific post-I admire not only your description of your mother’s strength and generosity, but the deep beauty you see in her-this is the definition of love-sounds like you are very lucky to have one another. Best wishes to you both as she recovers.

    Liked by 1 person

  46. Hugs! Reading the comments here, and just wanted to add that our life experiences influences and shapes the way we look at things, it’s always immensely personal – your hand in helping your mother with her recovery has given you an intimate insight into motherhood, meekness and humbleness that is unique and special. Sharing it with all of us takes integrity and courage. Beyonces celebration of her pregnancy and glorification of her womanhood as a goddess is over the top, but then that is unique to her persona as a performer and celebrity status. Beyonces depiction for me is a fun examination of populous culture, and symbol appropriation within our secular world.

    Now view together, both provide an interesting and dichotonomus discourse between the private and public, or between the sacred and the profane. – XD ❤

    Now

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you so much for this perspective. I really appreciate you sharing your thoughts! I definitely can see that – though it was over the opt, I can definitely see what she was trying to communicate, and I do appreciate her celebration of motherhood. Yeah, my mom is an incredibly special woman, and I learn so much from her every single day. big hugs to you xx

      Liked by 1 person

  47. A very good read. A parent is supposed to be the strong foundation that the rest of the family can build upon; but when a cardiovascular accident (CVA) (new terminology for a stroke) happens, that foundation crumbles, if only in the mind of the victim.

    In four more days I will pass the fifth anniversary of my own CVA. Right after it happened, my mind was screaming with what I wanted to say, but my body could no longer follow the brain’s orders.

    For a retired senior non-commissioned officer from the military, a father, and a brand new grandfather, there was nothing more terrifying than losing (in my mind anyway) my ability to perform my duties as the patriarch of the family. Fortunately, my actions immediately following the CVA prevented the incident from becoming worse than it did.

    Since that day, I am still fighting to try and recover all that was initially lost. My wife was gone for a week when it happened and originally resisted that I had suffered a CVA until the neurologist told her to her face to make her believe. Afterwards, she gave me no support which irked me to the nth degree and made me work harder to recover.

    The best thing (in my humble opinion) you can do for your mother is spiritually help her by acknowledging each victory of progress she makes while quietly making her make progress no matter how minute each achievement is. Tell her how much you love her and present a positive front that she will overcome this setback.

    In the meantime, you and your family will be in our prayers for as much recovery as the Lord will permit.

    God Bless,

    The R.I.

    PS – Sorry for being long winded.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Wow, RI. I am so touched by your thoughtful response. First of all, thank you for your service to our country. Secondly, thank you for your prayers – it is greatly appreciated. And thirdly, my gosh! I’m so sorry that you also suffered a CVA. It just breaks my heart to hear you describe what you went through. That’s such great advice though – I will love her and encourage her through this. That is what I am called to do. Thanks for your encouragement. Sending the biggest hugs xox

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Checked out last night shortly after sending my comments. So tired! Making a quick check of posts and replies this morning. Additional reaction to you at Patreon. Enjoy your day!

        Like

      2. Morning Jeff! No worries! Yeah, I did the same. My body clock is completely different here in Ohio than what it was in NYC! I don’t think I could stay up past midnight anymore even with a nap during the day! haha And this is from the girl who would stay out until the wee hours of the morning on the weekends! 🙂 haha how things can change. thanks again Jeff! big hugs xox

        Liked by 1 person

      3. This morning’s bible verse:
        Micah 6:8New King James Version (NKJV)
        He has shown you, O man, what is good;
        And what does the Lord require of you
        But to do justly,
        To love mercy,
        And to walk humbly with your God?

        Like

  50. I generally don’t watch award shows of any kind, so I didn’t see the Grammys. But I did see some tweets about the costume. Displays of bowing to any person are freakish to me. But enough about that…great post about your Mom and I’m confident she gave Beyonce more than a run for her money.

    Blessings and prayers to you both (and your Dad – good for him!).

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much! I really appreciate your prayers and kind words 🙂 Yeah, I am definitely very blessed to have such wonderful parents. And I’m with you — a bit freaky. Unless you’re Queen Elizabeth, it seems a little….much. Thanks for stoping by! big hugs xox

      Liked by 1 person

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