In The Hot Seat

Posted on by beautybeyondbones

I’m living the life of one of those 60-year-old “ladies who lunch.”

Seriously. All I need is a red hat, and false teeth and I’ll be ripe for initiation into bridge club. Or bunko.

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Juuuust kidding.

But it’s true though. In addition to the speech therapy and one-on-one work, one of the things my mom is doing to help her recovery from her stroke is to have lunch/coffee with a different girlfriend every day. Get her conversing in new situations with different people.

And guess who gets to accompany her on all said coffee dates….

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Haha. I actually don’t mind at all.

I will say this though…I’m gathering enough intel to pen an exposé on the housewives of suburban Ohio after all this.

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Haha….in another life.

But I’m also accompanying my mom to all her bible studies and book clubs.

Like I said…I’m turning in to a Red Hat Society inductee.


But at one of the small groups, everyone was talking about the decline of “oomph” in the church. Attendance is down, enthusiasm is redlining. And all these “empty nester” moms are all lamenting about how their millennial sons and daughters are no longer practicing their faith anymore.

And before I know it, the conversation has turned to me, and I’m getting thrown question after question after question because I’m a millennial who **GASP** believes in God and **DOUBLE GASP** goes to church every Sunday.

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And let me interject here – none of these women knew about this blog.

But these moms all wanted to know the secret. How did I survive college and live in NYC and not lose my faith? How did I keep God in my life?

And I’m not gonna lie – I was so uncomfortable being in the center of that conversation, like I was some amaaaaazing model-Christian that is some sort of saint in the making.

No ma’am. I mean, I can swear like a sailor and think some pretty terrible and judgmental things. #WorkInProgress

But to be honest, I have never really thought about that question, cut and dry like that before. I mean, walking away from God has just never been something that has crossed my mind. Or been an option. How have I kept God in my life? Well…

After really considering the question for a minute, the answer was as clear as day.

And I don’t really know how to relate this, so I’ll just tell you exactly what I said to these women.

I’ll leave out the part where I start out by saying, “Well, actually I have really incredible parents…” and the whole room bursts out laughing at the fact that I just inadvertently and accidentally basically just told this mother that the reason her kids don’t believe in God anymore is because they don’t have great parents….

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Yeah. Bone head move. Not my intention.

But I said,

“You know, I’ve actually had a lot of pretty life altering things happen to me in my short time around the sun so far.”

Looking around the room, I saw the faces of many of the “church ladies” who back during my anorexia, would give such judgmental looks and would offer their prayers in a way that felt more like a cast of judgment than sincerity. But I digress.

“As many of you probably remember, I battled a severe case of anorexia when I was in high school. Followed by an 11 month stint of bed rest from my Ulcerative Colitis back in 2012, I’ve had some pretty humbling and horrific things to deal with. And I learned from a very early age, that I can’t do this on my own. When you are at rock bottom, you learn very quickly that God is all you have and there’s no other option – you have to depend on Him. Fully. Why is God in my life? Because I wouldn’t be able to survive without Him.”

There were no further questions after that.

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I’m not some scholar on millennial church attendance. Nor am I some God-send Jesus whisperer to the masses. Heck no. All I have is my experience.

And what I’ve learned is that in order for God to have a real presence in your life, He has to change you. And for me, I had to go through some pretty deep shit in order to for that to happen. In order to abandon the pride and the vanity that was beginning to control my life, even in high school.

God is in my life because He’s saved it, not once, but twice. And I don’t have to be a brainiac to understand the importance of having Him by my side.

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At the end of the day, everyone is on their own journey. No parent is going to be able to make the decision for their kid, or vice versa.

I don’t know. Maybe that’s why I have this blog. To be in contact with such incredible people who all generously share their journeys so that I can learn and listen and grow. Because if truth be told, my faith still needs a lot a work.

So maybe this is me sitting across the table at a small group meeting asking you that question?

How do you keep God in your life? 

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BBB: Because we're all recovering from something. // For speaking/business inquiries: beautybeyondbones@yahoo.com

363 thoughts on “In The Hot Seat”

  1. What a good reminder 🙂 I keep God in my life by involving Him in everything I do. Prayer and constant thoughts towards the Saviour. Reading the Bible and talking about matters concerning the Church also helps me a lot 😀

    Liked by 2 people

  4. To be honest I started reading this and wanted to laugh (siblings are a sleep so I kept it quelled)….for some reason I thought the red hat thing was a local quirk of my own community ladies. Do they run around in the parades for you, too?

    Anyway, as to the question you asked us….I think you answered it well. For me, the harder life is going, the closer I am to God. That’s been a problem in times of good, but it’s easier for me to rely on God when it is physically impossible for me to do what needs to be done in a day. Pride/self-sufficiency is my biggest struggle everyday. It influences my relationships with everyone, not just God. But He is the one big enough to make sure I can’t move forward with that attitude. Inevitably I start thinking that way & something goes terribly wrong. I get so frustrated sometimes because it seems like every time I try to obey Jesus and love Him more I backslide big time. All the same – I’m close to Jesus because He stayed with me when I thought He should just destroy me instead. I’m close to Him because I need Him. I love Him because He showed me how to see beauty in His creation, and taught me how to love others. I laugh with God too – He usually uses humor to soften some minor correction I need. The Lord has done so much for me. How could I not love Him?

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    1. Wow, I am so moved by this beautiful reflection. Thank you so much for sharing your heart and thoughts and experiences. All I have to say is AMEN! He has stayed with us and shows us how much He lives us every day. Haha and yes! It’s a national quirk! 🙂 Hugs and love xox

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      1. Thank for sharing yours! Someday I hope to have a real conversation with you, where we can properly trade stories, be it here or in heaven. 🙂 And with His love He teaches something new every day. An experience I am so grateful for today.

        Huh. The things I learn. O_O I never thought to research the red hat ladies – never imagined it was national. Shalom!

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      2. Aw, that’s so kind of you to say. Yes! That conversation will happen one way or another 🙂 and I look forward to it 🙂 haha yes! The red hats are a nation wide phenomenon! 🙂 Hugs and love xox

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  5. I keep God in my life by thanking him every day. I pray a lot – When I first wake, when I’m in the car, when I go to sleep. I’m on the media team at my home church, where I run the computer and projectors for both services, once a month. It’s a good refresher and reminder. It’s also a bit of a social event – I get to see and catch up with church members and friends.

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  7. Caralyn–Love your honesty and straightforward writing. I’m one of those 60-ish ladies with 4 kids whom I adore and spend lots of sweet time with– but they’ve all left their faith and are petty much living lives on their own. I just try in support & encourage & listen, pray for them every morning and hope for God’s work in their lives in the days and years ahead… I’m thinking as you said, that they’ll find times when they can’t manage life without him. You post was a big encouragement. thanks.

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    1. Hello again friend:) I’m so glad that these words resonated with your heart. I think prayer is the best thing to do. Your kids obviously have an incredible mom as an example:) the journey is long and there are many detours along the way. But the story is never finished:) I’ll definitely keep them in my prayers too:) Hugs and love xox

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  8. I, too, would have been exceedingly uncomfortable being called to the carpet to explain the actions of our generation. I think Sherry Wedell (?), in her book, “Forming Intentional Disciples” tackles the numbers and the why’s – or, Matthew Kelly in “Rediscover Catholicism”. 🤔

    Sounds to me like you did a great job, even with your “bone head move”! 😂

    And, I find I struggle to relate to most of our generation simply because I am deeply committed to the Catholic Faith. As it stands, I our young family is one of a handful actively engaged in our parish right now – something I would love to see change, but don’t quite have all the answers on that!

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    1. Hi Anni! Hahah a bone head move it was. The room literally was laughing for a good 90 seconds! Ha Yeah, I can absolutely relate. Living out our faith, especially in today’s culture where sundays are for brunch and football, giving an hour or so to go to church seems “outdated” but I hope that you’re encouraged. We need more families like yours being a beautiful example in our communities! Big love to you xox

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  10. R.A Torry, a great evangelist, spoke to the idea of drawing people to Christ. It has impacted my parenting approach in this area. He said something (don’t have the exact quote) along the lines that we cannot make someone Christian, and we cannot give the baptism of the spirit, we can only partner with what the Holy Spirit is already doing in them. So basically: we are human God is God, and we ask to be part of what he is doing, not bare the burden of taking it over. It is a difficult question to face though as a mother: how do I make sure my children know the same saving grace and freedom I am privileged to walk in? I am hoping that running hard after Christ until the day I see him face to face will spur them on by example. But I also ultimately entrust them to the care of their perfect Heavenly Father, and try not to mess up what he is already doing.
    It is very encouraging in our current culture to her there are women like you, who just never thought to let go of God. Thanks for sharing:)

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  11. I keep God in my life by, well, sometimes my choosing, sometimes His. The moments when I seek him and abide in his promises are there, sure. But, more often than not, it’s God wiggling himself into my life, at inconvenient times to again prove how steady His love is. And for that, I am so thankful! ❤

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  12. Thanks for sharing. This has been inspiring. How do I keep God in my life? Truth is, I don’t. He’s just always there. I fall, I rise, I run back to Him. He’s always present.

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      1. Yes, absolutely right! Thanks. You’re a blessing and your blog is rewarding. Sending prayers and love to you and your family. God will come through for you guys.

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  13. This is a hard question for me to answer, mostly because, like you, I have gone through some pretty incredible and damaging things. And during those times it was so hard to lean on God. Because I felt like he had abandoned me in this hell that was my life during those times. When I did get back into going to church and trying to liven up my faith in God, the church was accepting. I found a home there with the people. But I got comfortable, and after some circumstances in my life were made public, the church actually asked me to leave.. I lost my Godly family. Or so I thought. Throughout that entire experience I have come to realize, God calls the shots. He puts you into situations where you think your world is falling apart so he can be the glue that puts it back together. All of the times when I felt so completely alone in life, I have come to realize that God was there the entire time. Leading me the direction he needed me to go. And so now, instead of feeling abandoned and alone,
    I look to God and say lead me where you need me, in all of my times of trial and discomfort. And he always answers. He never leaves me. That’s how I stay a Christian in this day and age. However, that being said, I don’t always go to church on Sundays. I have a temper and a bad mouth on occasion, and I struggle everyday to live a Godly lifestyle. But I haven’t lost my faith. Struggling now brings me closer to God. Each failing, every day, lets me know that I am not done, and his work in me is not done, and that he will (most likely) give me one more day to try to be who he needs and wants me to be.

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    1. Hi Briakay! Thank you so much 🙂 I’m glad this resonated with you. I’m sorry that you felt alone during those times and that your community that was supposed to be centered in Christ turned out to not be the beacon of hope and support they should have been. That breaks my heart. You did not deserve that. But I’m so glad that you’ve come to find God’s unwavering presence in all of this. Sending massive hugs and love. Xox

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      1. Thank you! Sending you love and blessings as you deal with and handle the aftermaths of your mother’s stroke! You are such a strong person, and your love for God is inspirationally beautiful, so I know you can do this!

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    2. Love this! My experience with corporate church has not been the greatest but I am a part of a local body which I love. I love the confirmation that Jesus gives us through the body which is beyond our local church. There is so much you have said here that I relate to. It is so amazing how God puts something right in front of you.

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      2. I agree completely! He has used all of my messed up past experiences to teach me that unconditional love, like his, doesn’t fade like human love. And that’s a cherished knowledge during both good and bad times!

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    1. Thank you so much! That’s so kind of you to say. Wow, what a gift you’re giving your grandparent. I will definitely keep them in my prayers. She’s doing better every day. We are very hopeful. Thanks for asking 🙂 Hugs and love xox

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  15. You never cease to amaze me! So insightful and delightful to read! Not only to you offer us much to think about, you write in such a fun way.

    On a side note, you might want to take advantage of those older women. I have friends decades younger and others, decades younger than I am. We learn so much from each other. God bless.

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    1. Thanks so much Mary:) that’s so kind of you to say. What great advice. And it’s true! Every lunch/coffee/study, I walk away with a new little nugget of insight or glimpse of His grace. This really is a precious time and I’m grateful for the opportunity. God is funny how He works in the most mysterious (and creative) of ways 🙂 even through third wheel coffee dates with “the ladies.” thanks so much for your constant positivity and encouragement. I am grateful for you!! 🙂 Hugs and love xox

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  16. By just reminding myself daily where my help comes from. I struggle because I forget that I have a father in heaven who knows all and sees all and just wants me to talk to him. We all struggle with that.

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  18. I think you made an important point when you described the judgmental looks you once received regarding your experience with Anorexia. This is probably one of the main reasons people don’t connect with God or church, because they don’t feel accepted as they are in the midst of human experience which can be messy and ugly. I have had a similar experience in that I learned to depend upon God when I was in the midst of crisis and had no where else to go. So in that respect I am grateful for what I have been through.

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    1. Thanks so much for this thoughtful response. That’s so true – our lives are messy and can be ugly at times. But it’s in those times that we really need God and really need a supportive community. Not one that looks down or judges. So glad this hit home with you. 🙂 Hugs and love xox

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  19. Dear Carolyn my friend and blogger. Allow this to be the last comment that I ever make on your WordPress site. The comments I have referring to the said post aren’t going to be flattering to a lot of people. You may become offended and I encourage you not to be but instead of the ones that I gave you here today. It is true of the millennials have declined Church choosing instead to watch Church with the comfort of Netflix and a bowl of popcorn front of them rather than enjoying some good gospel soul for music. One of the many reasons the Millennials of this age in which I despise refuse to go to church is because Millennials of this generation have become a spoiled rotten they have everything they need or think they have everything they need. If there’s one line in the movie God’s Not Dead that was solidified the Millennials it’s this sometimes the devil allows people to live free from trouble because he doesn’t want people to turn to God. Another reason the people refuse to turn to God is because they think they have the greatest life possible right now and they think by sacrificing for God they’re giving up the world when in reality the world in itself is just ashes. Even Moses himself said he refused to enjoy the pleasures of sin for a season using to join in the afflictions with his people. Point Blank listen to me please I I love your works and I really enjoy reading the blog but I have a serious problem here I feel as though you have one foot in the world and the other pointed to the Cross I don’t mean to say this to sound mean or anything I’m just confused how can you swear like a sailor in your own words how can you go to the bar until 2 a.m. and then go home home and pray it off. The number one reason the Millennials are slacking and lacking is because they refused to get baptized by the Holy Ghost. Receiving the Holy Ghost is more than just going in pool receiving the holy ghost means getting him by fire just like they did on the day of Pentecost just like Jeremiah did just like the prophet Isaiah. I’m so envious and angry with you because you are the greatest state it has one of the holiest churches in your backyard and yet I have to come from Canada and travel 17 hours just to come to Ohio once a month. I have to sacrifice money and time I deny the flesh everyday I speak only words of edification but yet I weep for people like you in Ohio that had the Church of Philadelphia right in their backyard and they refused to go in and find true salvation the millennials of this age only want the form of godliness the Lord says from such people turn away so I have turned away from reading your blog any further in the future but I tell you this because I love you…. and there’s nothing more in the world that I would like for you serve god with your whole heart mind and being.

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    1. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I’m sorry that you disapprove of the way I’m living my life. I am a work in progress and I have never pretended to be anything more or less. I am just honestly and authentically me. And I’m sorry that you feel you cannot continue to read my blog. I want you to know how much I have enjoyed our friendship over these past two years. You have been in my prayers with your situation ever since our paths crossed, and know that you will continue to be 🙂 I have always and will always consider you a friend 🙂 hope you find it in your heart to come back soon! Hugs and love xox

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      8. I apologize if I in any way offended you. I am going to be starting a new sagment on my blog post. Journeying With Jesus. The Heartbeat Of God and The Heartbeat of Man. Again I deeply apologize if I in anyway offended you. You are my friend, and in truth I am honored that you consider me a friend. Take care and may the love of Christ always follow you….

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  20. I can’t love this any more than I already do… My husband and I are the rare millennials who came to Christ ‘later in life’ (you know, because we’re so old lol) and people at church are always surprised. They have the same laments – that their kids won’t go to church or have fallen off the church bandwagon… Our pastor even asked us once how the church can reach our generation. We talk about it a lot, and I would say it’s because of a lot of things, but we fall away mainly because our generation has been big on self. We’re independent and we do what we want and we can do it all on our own. Until we just plain can’t anymore. It takes a few falls to realize God is the only one that will be there every time without fail.

    And I would agree that hearing the stories of others is such a faith builder. I love to be around people and just hear where they’ve been. Our own story is enough to remind me that everyone’s got something in their past. It’s neat to see where people have been and find strength in that.

    Blessings to you! ❤

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    1. Hi Britt, thank you so much for this kind response. Haha “later in life” — everything is relative 🙂 haha That’s so much – we’re the generation that created the word, “selfie!” So true – we can’t do it without God. Thanks for sharing part of your story. Sending massive hugs to you xox

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  21. A similar situation happened to me once after Eucharistic Adoration. I was exiting the church when an older woman was just staring at me with this expression of disbelief. At first I thought I had something on my face, but when I looked around the church I realized it was because I was the youngest one in attendance. There were no children, or young adults there; mostly older married couples or grandmothers.

    I, too, live in a congested, secular city like NYC and I’ve come to find it to be a real litmus test for faith. You either throw it away, or yearn for it. I’ve known so many “cradle-Catholics” who abandoned their faith for the worldliness that’s just so “in-your-face” in the concrete jungle. They become confused and don’t know what’s real anymore. Why do these things happen? It’s honestly an array of things, both in society and even in the home.

    But the Lord sometimes makes us experience certain things in order to humble us, and draw us closer to Him. I’ve had my own ups and downs in life, too, and I’m thankful for His grace. He’s got a way of turning disasters into something beautiful. Just look at the Cross! A horrible and grotesque death turned into a glorious Resurrection! God makes everything new again, including us.

    The Lord’s got a plan for everything, even with the current state of the Church. If He never gives up calling us, He most definitely isn’t going to quit calling others. We just got to stick with Him and have faith.

    Great post, BBB! God bless!

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  25. You are an inspiration! Your life is a blessing to those around you.
    Sometimes when we go through so much in life, we ask the question why? We are all sinners who stumble and fall… without that we wouldn’t need God in our lives. It’s His way to use our lives to be His light into this world. No matter how big or small we think we are. Our experiences and triumphs is what He uses to let the world of His mercy, grace, and unconditional love for us.
    God bless you and thank you that you use your life for others to see His glory.

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  28. It was a smoking hot seat!!! Lol!
    Well, with regards to keeping God in my life, I really am clueless about that. All I know is this: God is incredibly great at keeping me in Him. So, it is not really about me keeping Him in my life. It is about Him keeping me in Him. God and I have this eternal love relationship going. Not gonna trade it for anything in the world.

    Awesome awesome post!!

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  29. Love your thoughts here. God is it that is for sure. My physical body keeps letting me down but God is always there. Thanks for sharing! It truly is good to hear a younger person say this. My kids are strong but I love hearing it outside.

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  30. I keep God in my life by being alive. He is. He simply is. I don’t keep Him anywhere because He’s everywhere. Once you meet Him you only need to open your eyes to see Him.

    That’s not to say I’m a churchgoer. Church has not been a part of my life for several years. Those two are very different things. Those you suppose are apart from God may be closer than you think.

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    1. He is. Gosh, I love that so much. Amen! He’s everywhere. And I agree- I see His presence so often throughout the day, whether it’s in a sunset or a moment of peace or a song that really moves me. Thanks for sharing that powerful insight. Hugs and love xox

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  31. I’ve been trying to piece together some kind of response to this; I’ve already written and then deleted a few different tries. It’s been a while since I didn’t have had all the wrong words and maybe it’s because this is a really hot seat for me.

    There’s a slew of things spinning around in my head–the article from FaithIt written by a millenial about millenial decline in churches that popped up on my facebook newsfeed the same day as your article–the young couple my wife and I have begun mentoring who are on the knife-edge of basically excommunication from her family for choosing us over a cult in church clothes–the myriads of millenials clearly uninterested in playing church–my older brother’s slide from truth-seeking, cult-overturning christian to agnostic… and of course they want to know why millenials aren’t interested in church, the last generation is probably terrified there won’t be anyone left to carry their legacy. I know I would be.

    But it’s time for something different–I’ve said this before–so I’ve never viewed the decline in ‘church attendance’ in our generation as a problem to solve. I’m not worried about millenials getting back into church. What I’m worried about is an entire generation being disillusioned by their parents and grand parents being willing to settle for ‘church’ being a ‘place’ you CAN ‘attend’ instead of a growing, changing community with Christ–a REAL PERSON–at its center.

    It’s true, my parents influenced me big time, because they didn’t settle for religion. But I’m not really ‘in’ the church like most people might consider ‘the church’. Sure, I have an awesome community, we get together for dinner once a week, it’s a highlight of a lot of people’s weeks. But organized ‘church culture’? No thanks.

    There’s a book floating around by Wayne Jacobsen called So You Don’t Want to Go To Church Anymore, you should check it out if you get a chance, it totally unravelled what christians call church for me–not that Holy Spirit wasn’t already doing that in my heart already. Honestly I think ‘church’ as we’ve known it is waaaaaaay down the list of what millenials–or anyone, really–need. So this is what I’m teaching my teen group:

    1) Father loves you immutably

    2) The gospel is good NEWS, it’s about what a REAL PERSON already FINISHED.

    And 3) church is us. Church is us together being us, with Jesus in our midst. Church is community, church is hanging out together be that having dinner, playing games, watching movies, camping out by a lake for a week, or just having a quiet conversation over coffee. Church is when we come together to grow and to discover and to start using the gifts Jesus has given us to make our community bigger and stronger and more in love with our Beloved. Can that happen in a church building? Sure. But it doesn’t look very much like what is happening across the continent in church buildings every sunday morning, it doesn’t look like playing church or ‘knowing’ what the preacher talks about in his sermon, it’s about community and relationship and religion just can’t do a spit kadiddle for the hunger millenials have for that kind of truth and authenticitt in community and relationship…. It’s time for ‘the church’ to reimagine Church…

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    1. Wow this is so powerful. It makes me want to get up and do something about it! Haha thank you so much for this powerful reflection, Carson. What a gift you are to those teens. I love the three points you teach them. How important is that first one : father loves you immutably. That’s the basis for everything. So much great food for thought here, Carson. I really appreciate you sharing your heart and thoughts! Hope you have a great night. Hugs and love xox

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      1. You’re too kind 😀 I’m glad then that I didn’t stop at my first attempt ;D I think one of the biggest things is simply, we haven’t been included enough–religion aside because I know not every church out there is dead and crusty, haha–we haven’t been given much say in the church and the church hasn’t taken a lot of effort to compromise, and I mean why not? It worked for generations, why shouldn’t the model work for millenials too? But millenials are a God-loaded revolution waiting to happen, I can feel it coming if they all just got that ‘aha!’ moment it would start a landslide nobody could stop. And THAT makes me EXCITED! 😀

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    2. This is so spot on! I am so thankful for this encouragement. I raised my kids no religion at the core. Jesus all the way. I am astounded to hear you efface here the things I have taught them all these years. God knew I needed to hear this! Such an encouragement as I try to build up my kids in adulthood!

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  32. I simply start to feel lousy and isolated if I stay away from Mass for too long. It’s like a fish out of water. Sometimes I wish I could “just pray” or “look at a candle” like some of my friends and acquaintances. But for some reason God obviously requires me at Mass… or vice versa I should say. But I don’t push it on others. I really do believe it’s not for everyone. So many different forms of spiritual practice and types of people.

    Btw, I’ve been meaning to mention… but you probably know. The brain can create new pathways around affected areas from stroke. Neuroplasticity. I’m sure your docs have told you all this… 🙂

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    1. Hi Michael! A fish out of water — what a great way to put it. Thanks for sharing this. I really appreciate it. a lot of what you said really resonated with me. And yes! That’s what we’re working on with my mom…creating those “detours” around the area 🙂 thanks!! hope you have a great weekend. hugs xox

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  33. “When you are at rock bottom, you learn very quickly that God is all you have and there’s no other option – you have to depend on Him”. I know how true that is!!! You are a blessing to many by sharing your pains. You give hope to those who are at that rock bottom time of life. God bless you so much!

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  36. Let me reiterate again in case I haven’t done that properly in the past. I love your writings!
    This had me laughing:
    ” No ma’am. I mean, I can swear like a sailor and think some pretty terrible and judgmental things. #WorkInProgress”
    Happens to the best of us. The are lots of things I still find within me which i abhor.
    The blogging community is really great. It helps us to connect with other people like you said and to learn, listen, grow.
    Keep up the good work. I cannot imagine what it is like in your shoes but in all honesty I believe there is a lot of wisdom we young people impatiently miss because we don’t spend much time with the elderly. And when you do write an exposé on the housewives of suburban Ohio after all this(no kidding), I’ll be here to read it.
    Have a delightful time.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi again! haha oh gosh, thank you Debby. I’m so glad that you like my blogs! Yeah, there’s definitely a lot of areas that I’m working on! Isn’t that true! I have learned so much from people generously sharing their stories and advice in the comments section. It is truly such a blessing to me. And amen to that – I have learned so much from these meetings and just being with my mom and her friends. haha Thanks again 🙂 big hugs and have a great weekend! hugs xox

      Liked by 1 person

  38. Well, in answer to your loaded question, Caralyn, I would have to say, I don’t. I just do whatever I want whenever I want. Think what I want about what I want and express it accordingly. I was burdened by this “model” thing at one time in my life, “Oh, I want my daughter to marry a son like yours…blah blah blah blah…” to my mother. I’m so glad that’s over. Now they all one-glance me and run away. I’m kinda glad for the freedom. “Exampling” can be such slavery! But that’s my opinion. I’m not trying to change yours. If I were, I would say so outright.

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  40. Hey Caralyn. I trust you, along with your Mom and Dad, are doing well.
    I have an entirely new empathy, and heart felt feelings for the three of you. Last Sunday afternoon, Feb. 12, I suddenly had a stroke. No warnings of any kind, with Blood Pressure being in the perfect range every time checked, with the last being two weeks prior at the Dentist.
    Anyway, on Sunday afternoon I was sitting at home, just going to have a piece of home made coffee cake that had cooled enough to eat. As I attempted to lift the plate off the table, I could not hold it, and it fell onto the floor. (What a waste).
    At that time, my speech became all garbled, there was no feeling down my entire right side, and my right arm was uncontrollable, flying up and down.
    Firefighters, and EMS arrived quickly, ER personnel were waiting at the hospital when I arrived. And most importantly, our daughter notified family, church, and friends to start praying.

    A shortened version, … by Monday night, all signs of a stroke were gone. A number of tests followed all week, with nothing showing, Physio Therapists, Occupational Therapists, Nurses all said they had never seen a recovery like this. Two Doctors said it was amazing that full strength, full speech full normalcy returned to my entire being.

    Praise Jesus, for His Healing Touch, as well as all who helped, using skills and knowledge given by God.

    I cannot explain it apart from God’s Grace, just like I cannot explain why your Mom, and a couple of my friends did not get full recovery following strokes.
    But, like I noted previously, I empathize in a greater way what each of you are going through, and now I can / will pray more specifically, fervently, understandingly.
    Seeing what my Wife, Son and Daughter were going through, gave me that perspective from the family view also, so I appreciate the love and care you give to both, in an even greater way.

    God’s Blessings my Friend, be on You, your Mom and Dad.
    Luv, ❤️🌹😘

    George

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh George! My heart sank when I read this! Oh friend, I am so incredibly sorry to hear that, but praise God that you are okay now! That is such a relief! I will definitely keep you and your family in my prayers during the aftermath of such a scary event. Yeah, my mom is doing better everyday. We are grateful and excited for the healing she’s had thus far and are hopeful for a full recovery, however long that may take 🙂 Gosh, I am just so glad you are okay! I wish i could give you a big hug right now! Hang in there, George. You are amazing. hugs xox

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      1. Thank You Caralyn, I appreciate all your prayers, knowing Jesus answers prayer, just not always in our time frame or understanding.
        And I Receive your big hug, and hug you also, you are truly an inspiration.
        I am so glad to hear that your Mom is improving. As we continue in prayer, I believe her speech and memory will return.
        How is your Dad doing during this difficult time for him also?

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      2. Thanks George:) I so appreciate your continued prayers. And I’m sending up lots of prayers of thanksgiving for you!! 🙂 my dad is such a rock. He is an incredible person. I learn so much from him everyday:) thanks for asking 🙂 Hugs and love xox

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  41. I don’t want to sit here and type a looooong response to this powerful post. Everything in this was amazing however. The timing , the setting , the reminder of your past, and your response. WoW just WoW!

    Thank-You for being evidence of God.

    -JV

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      1. I just realized I did not answer the question “How do you keep God in your life?” Well, it all starts with trust. If you read any of my blog most of my life is a result of trusting God. All the opportunities have been a result of trusting him in every step. I have to KEEP him in my life for guidance. I have to KEEP him in my life to sustain me. I have to KEEP him in my life to achieve greatness. All these things just mean so much more and stick around so much longer because of the supernatural power of GOD involved with all of it.

        Yep, that’s how. 🙂

        -JV

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Trust. Oh that’s so important. And easier said than done. But you’re right, when we trust Him, He will never let us down. It will definitely be an adventure. But will always be good. Such great advice and perspective. Thanks for sharing that, JV! Hope you’re having a great weekend! Hugs and love xox

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  42. Love this so much. Thank you for sharing! I hate that there’s almost a “shame” associated with sharing personal faith, and not worrying about “offending” someone just because I’m an outspoken and practicing Christian. God has loved us even in our worst moments, in our best moments, and in our moments of unfaithfulness when we consistently said “no” to Him and His open arms. I know he wants us to share his love and power to encourage the hearts of His children ready to hear his voice, and to persist for some who aren’t. Thank you for sharing His voice! ❤

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  43. Faith is a stream not a river. Some months its there and others you must crawl literally at times, further up the mountain. Like, most metaphors in life. You get dirty looking for answers.

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      5. In 1874, Charles Kingsley had a sermon about the future of the church. Reason must be taught alongside the liturgy. I think, its because reason is the main argument against the church. As civilization modernizes into its own religion it must be countered by thoughtful reasoning.

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      7. Just, thinking out loud. Faith in anything is a kind of bias and reason helps to balance, again. It removes the occurrences of fundamentalist thinking because you aren’t excluding yourself or others and you have tools to learn, listen, and teach.

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  44. You are wonderful for doing all that you are doing for your mom! She is blest to have you!! Keeping God in your life brings out more and more amazing things about you and all that makes you entirely beautiful in and out!! Hugsssssssssssss!!!

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  45. Ha ha. And a lovely photo 🙂
    How do I keep God in my life, now?
    I think, with an attitude of the heart, with being open to God’s way. And other things too…

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  46. I’m a missionary on the Navajo Nation, and we do a Bible study every night along with worship together as a group. It really helps you to stay closer to God and to learn a lot of new stuff. Great post by the way! I really do enjoy reading your blog’s! Thank you

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  48.  “…-I can’t do this on my own. When you are at rock bottom, you learn very quickly that God is all you have and there’s no other option – you have to depend on Him. Fully. Why is God in my life? Because I wouldn’t be able to survive without Him.”

    So damn true tho. ❤❤.

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  49. Hello!
    I thought I was just coming by to say “Hi!” and thank you for favoriting my post – but after reading this, I need to also thank you for such an enjoyable and thought provoking read. The honesty is tangible, and the gifs are a great touch.
    It’s rather amazing, isn’t it? How the God of the universe would love us enough to make Himself real in our individual lives, to reach out through all the storms. We start out with plenty of information about faith in our heads, but He doesn’t rest until it’s firmly established in our hearts as well. He doesn’t rest until we know we’re loved.
    Keep going, lotsa blessings. 🙂

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  50. Caralyn,

    My family shared your post along with Not So Random Chick’s today in our family time. Her’s talked about legacies and yours talked about the One behind good legacies, so together they were timely reminders and encouragements.

    To me it seems the effort is not so much to keep God, (as that doesn’t seem to take much effort – He’s always so joyously available!) as it is to keep from straying from Him. So I would ask ‘What do you do to keep from straying from Him in your life?’

    Would love to hear people’s answers to that one!

    It might merit a write. You know I’m intentionally ‘lying fallow’ right now, and this would be great stuff for me to reflect on in this season – staying with God and building legacies.

    Love and prayers to your parents from all of us, and many blessings over you.
    Indi

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Indi! Oh wow that sounds like such an interesting article. So true-our difficultly lies in not straying from Him. I love that idea – staying with God and building legacies. Thanks again for all your prayers and support. You and your family are a blessing to me! Hope you have a great afternoon! Hugs and love xox

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      1. 10:48 at night really. And this is the last comment for me for the day – I’m 18 mins behind bedtime – family’s already in. 🙂 But I certainly hope for a good afternoon tomorrow. Mondays tend to be hectic. Bye for now. I.

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