Challenging Feminism

Posted on by beautybeyondbones

Lately, it’s been really weird to be a woman.

200-11

Not because of any fashion or makeup trends…although, I will say…I don’t quite understand the reemergence of the shoulder pad.

But because of all the recent hyper focus on…feminism.

The Women’s March, International Women’s Day, protests, walk outs, I mean, we get it already…

But to be honest, I am confused by the whole matter.

Women are not marginalized in the United States of America. 

What are they fighting for? Why all the anger?

Now listen, I know that this post is probably going to garner a lot of backlash, but you know what, that’s okay. I would love to hear thoughts on all sides of this issue. Truly. Every person is entitled to their own viewpoints, and I respect those feelings, even if they differ from mine. And of course, there is always room for improvement in removing some lingering issues, (representation in senior management, ensuring equal wages), but there is no attack on women.

img_0711

But again, I don’t know what women are fighting for.

Is it because we have access to health care?

Is it because 57% of enrolled college students are female?

I’ll repeat that….57% of college students are female.

Is it because women can hold any job they desire, up to and including the President of the United States?

Is it because women can wear anything, say anything, go out in public, drive a car, vote, go to school, worship freely, and have/adopt children here without the say or approval of a man?

I just don’t get it.

200-7

Perhaps they’re marching for the end to rape. Okay. That’s truly a phenomenal cause, and I salute that.

But I honestly don’t think a march is going to change that. You know what might? A change in our culture. Maybe we need to reconsider the messages that we’re sending to young boys and men in society about how to treat a woman. Perhaps we shouldn’t be referring to women as “bitches and hoes” in our music and television. Perhaps we shouldn’t be objectifying or infantilizing grown women in our advertising. When we reduce a person to mere body parts or tools for pleasure, it’s no wonder that men feel they have the ability to take advantage. Perhaps we should challenge the multi-billion dollar porn industry. Perhaps we should be changing the narrative on that, and reclaim our dignity as women and prize our sexuality and virginity for what it is.

And women, we’re not off the hook either. Listen, I love a little black dress more than anything. Especially if it’s backless. But if we’re going to walk out of the house in lingerie-equivalent club wear, it’s asking for trouble. Of course men should be able to control themselves. “Asking for it” is never, ever, ever an excuse. But if we’re not respecting our own bodies, how can we expect anyone else to?

The biggest thing I have a problem with, is women who are marching for abortion rights.

It’s no secret, I am staunchly pro-life.

But here’s where the feminism argument just doesn’t hold up.

So much of feminism is tied up in the sexual revolution and the emergence of The Pill. The cry of feminism for women to have the sexual freedom that men “have” is the exact antithesis of what true feminism really is!

The very essence of being female is the ability to bear children. Bring life into the world. That is the one and only thing that is uniquely female. That is the aspect of being a woman that is what should be celebrated and cherished and protected. And, in the name of feminism, we’re fighting to squelch that? Fighting to suppress that exclusively female gift? That, in my opinion, is the exact opposite of feminism.

giphy-3

“But we’re fighting for a woman’s right to control her own body.”

Okay, terrific. That’s important.

But here’s the thing. Abortion is different because it involves two bodies: the mother’s and the baby’s. Her decision is not just hers, but her child’s. How is ending another human life controlling her own body? That sounds to me like controlling someone else’s body.

You want to fight for the marginalized? How about you start with the smallest and most vulnerable of them all? – The child in the womb.

Frankly, I have been so disappointed to be a woman here recently. All the photos of women wearing red, and proclaiming that they’re boycotting work to show what it would be like to have a world without women.

Please. Give me a break. You have a job. A paycheck. A degree. Benefits. Clean drinking water. Health care. Equal opportunities.

This whole feminist movement thing, it just smells of domineering, desperate estrogen, if I’m being really honest.

200-9

I am uniquely female. God made women as the crown of creation. We bring life into the world. We are relational. We are receptive. Feelers. Communicators. Soft. Delicate. Those things are who we are by nature.

Frankly, it is unnatural to try and dominate a man and emasculate him.

I think one of the most beautiful things we can do as women is to let a man be a man, and challenge him to rise to his highest form of masculinity: providing for his family, protecting, guarding, leading. That is what a man’s heart longs for: adventure. Rescuing. Providing.

Their inherent natures and our inherent natures are a complimentary pair. Perfectly in harmony.

Maybe if we call out men to be those types of upstanding men, and we their equal partners, complimenting each other’s traits, perhaps all the other things will work themselves out. Because a man called to true masculine greatness will respect a woman, her body, her mind, her talents, abilities, passions.

Because at the end of the day, feminism is not a bad thing. But its definition has been bastardized in recent times. Feminism is the revolution of femininity – in all its forms.

img_2489

We, as women, bring with us, our uniquely feminine traits – our feminine genius – into each and every role we take on, whether that be a teacher, a business exec, a mother, a nurse, the President, a professional athlete. Those uniquely feminine traits make us exceptional at those things, and should be celebrated.

A woman is a unique being: capable of all that a man can do, and more. We are the bearers of life. Why are we fighting that which makes us most powerful?

That’s feminism. That’s where we need to begin.

________________________________________________________________
Stay Connected!
@beauty.beyond.bones – Instagram

Facebook

Twitter

YouTube

A big thank you to my new sponsor, BetterHelp Online Therapy.  Speak with an online therapist. Or check out content about eating disorders from BetterHelp.

Please check out my affiliate partners! Doing so helps you, and it helps me 🙂 Amazon, Reebok, NatureBox, Sunbasket, WPengine Webhosting, Warby Parker, Masterclass

patreon

Thank you for considering supporting BBB on Patreon! You make this blog possible 🙂

img_2907

Published by

Unknown's avatar

beautybeyondbones

BBB: Because we're all recovering from something. // For speaking/business inquiries: beautybeyondbones@yahoo.com

701 thoughts on “Challenging Feminism”

  1. Wow. I don’t know what else to say. I don’t agree with what feminisim has become but I could never figure out how to put it into words. This post is exactly it. Especially they part about rape. I don’t know why men and women are compared. It is like comparing apples and oranges. Thank you!!!

    Liked by 5 people

      3. BBB, thank you for finding the courage to say this! I agree that the harmony between a man and woman is a beautiful thing that has been lost to the majority of our culture.
        I don’t comment on each of your posts, but I pray for and bless you after each one! Keep up the good fight! 💗

        Like

      4. Thank you so much Christy! Oh you’re so sweet, thank you for reading my posts! I think you’re so right- that harmony is a glimpse of grace 🙂 thank you again for your prayers. Big big hugs xox

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Perhaps we shouldn’t be objectifying or infantilizing grown women in our advertising. When we reduce a person to mere body parts or tools for pleasure, it’s no wonder that men feel they have the ability to take advantage. Perhaps we should challenge the multi-billion dollar porn industry. Perhaps we should be changing the narrative on that, and reclaim our dignity as women and prize our sexuality and virginity for what it is.
    ^ Part of the problem is women are objectifying THEMSELVES. They don’t need the media, porn, or men to do it for them. An Instagram account has served quite nicely. And, by all means, let’s Free the Nipple! *rolls eyes*

    Liked by 5 people

    1. Oh my gosh SO true! That is absolutely a big part of the problem. Yeah, i am not keen on that “campaign” either. it makes me sad, frankly. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and taking the time to read! i really appreciate it! hugs xo

      Liked by 1 person

  5. I think you are a great writer but I have to say I disagree on some of the points you’ve made. I guess for me personally the main one is where you write about the “very essence of being a women is the ability to bear children”. I’ve never been maternal and as an adult I still don’t want to children. I don’t think this makes me any less of a women then those women who want children but physically can’t have them, for whatever reason.

    Secondly, I find your descriptions of men and women very stereotyped and old fashioned. I know women who better fit your description of what a man is and vice versa, and I think they should be encouraged to embrace themselves as they are, rather than feel ashamed or upset that they are not a masculine man or a feminine women. A man can also be receptive, delicate and soft. A woman can also be the provider, the protector, the leader and the adventuror.

    I hope you don’t take offence but I just wanted to share. Take care x

    Liked by 9 people

    1. Thank you so much for sharing this perspective, Natalie. You bring up a lot of great point. You’re right, we are all unique in our personality traits and our make up and physical tendencies. And that doesn’t make us more or less women than the next. And it’s true, women can absolutely be the providers! I guess i was just trying to say that she is exceptional in that role because she brings her uniquely feminine traits to that…be it powerful critical thinking skills or strong relational prowess. 🙂 Thank you so much for joining the dialogue! I truly love hearing all viewpoints and ideas. Have a great night! hugs xox

      Liked by 3 people

    2. This was also my thought, and I thank you for sharing it so well – not sure I could have worded it as nicely 🙂 I am a happily married woman n a marriage in which I am loved, cherished and insanely happy – that being said we are the complete opposite of the gender stereotypes – my husband is the quieter, gentler and more emotional one in the family. We have discussed adoption and he would love to be a stay at home father should that work for us. I, meanwhile, am the A type personality – driven, career motivated and planning on continuing to be the provider in our home. The difference in our roles I don’t believe define who I am as a woman, or him as a man, and we compliment each other beautifully.

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Thank you so much for sharing this. i think you’re right, males and females are a perfect pair and complement each other wonderfully. and we each have unique traits that we bring to our different roles, whatever they may be, that make us exceptional at them! you bring uniquely feminine traits – such as strength and empathy and strong relational skills and critical thinking and multitasking – to your career, and that is so awesome and should be celebrated! 🙂 thanks for sharing this. so glad you stopped by! hugs xox

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Love. This. POST. I feel too many people are concerning themselves with *sameness* instead of equality. A woman doesn’t have to be “like a man” or “do what a man does”… You make an excellent point about the uniqueness of being female and the lengths people are willing to go to dismiss it completely. We are made differently for a reason! Not to be less than, but to bring something unique and irreplaceable to the world. I don’t think it’s just women though. There’s a noticeable change in men and how people view traditional masculinity as well.

    Liked by 6 people

    1. Thank you so much 🙂 I’m so glad this resonated with you. Yes! We bring our uniquely feminine traits with us into whatever role we occupy — and that makes us exceptional! 🙂 Yes!! Love what you said there. thanks for sharing your thoughts! big hugs xox

      Like

  8. Thank you for your article and heart-felt expression!

    As a man, I have found it to be tantamount to a suicidal mission to talk about feminism with feminists. I have “committed suicide” many times!

    Voices like your’s are needed in our society and culture. You are clear in the articulation of your opinions and beliefs, AND you speak as a woman who is fully engaged in the very culture that the feminists are demanding ALL men and women to change in accordance with the current Feminist paradigm. (The “ideology” of Feminism has dramatically changed over the years).

    Liked by 5 people

  12. Great post. I love how you addressed the sexual revolution and connection to the increased marginalization/objectification of women. If you haven’t already done so “The Birth of the Pill” and “Adam and Eve after the Pill” were two really helpful reads for me. Keep up the great work.

    Like

    1. Thank you so much for this thoughtful response, Josh. I haven’t read those books, but they sound like really great reads! thanks for passing them along, and for the encouraging words! big hugs xox

      Like

  13. Mic dropped this post out of the water! So incredibly well written and thank you for posting this!!! It’s so refreshing to hear such a beautiful young woman as yourself standing up for the unborn and just unapologetically owning your stance. Bravo dear friend! Bravo!

    Liked by 3 people

    1. ahahahah thank you so much Apes 😉 It’s a bit of an unpopular opinion, especially among us millenials, but I think more people secretly hold those feelings, they’re just afraid to speak about it. Or they hold those feelings without really knowing they do. They just need a little nudge of encouragement to realize it — in whatever way that is…a blog, a school presentation, a positive-lyric’ed song.. 😉 love ya Apes!!! xoxoxo

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Well it’s not often we see such brave words in a lopsided society such as ours. Having issues that we don’t agree with crammed down our throats daily will become a thing of the past, I hope.

        Thank you for this post because it says EVERYTHING I’ve ever thought of Feminism. The thing I worry about most is my 8-year-old son growing up and feeling as though he has to apologize for being a man. NOT ON MY WATCH!

        I also try not to perpetuate the Princess Syndrome with my young daughter. Telling girls they are princesses their whole lives does not promote equality. I do encourage her in every way that I can, but no one should be placed on a pedestal simply because of their gender.

        Thank you again. I would give you a thousand standing ovations if I could, but I think The Rock will have to do. 😉

        Liked by 1 person

      2. oh my gosh, thank you again for the encouragement. it sounds like you are an absolutely awesome mom. your kids are going to grow up to be the ones to make the positive changes in our world! i’m applauding you for that! just like The Rock 🙂 hehe thanks again for joining the dialogue! big hugs xoxoxoxo

        Liked by 1 person

  16. Hi this is a really well balanced article. You are right to point out that in most western cultures being a woman shouldn’t mean you are repressed or limited simply because of your gender. There is a balancing argument that men have a lot of issues in society (violence against, incarceration rates and sentencing times, paternity rights etc – and that’s before we get into the subliminal man shaming bullshit dished out by men and women).
    The clear difference is that they don’t have a voice, well, because its not a valid argument to complain about being a man. Ok that’s fine, I really don’t have an issue with gender, I’d rather be respectful and celebrate the good things about being a human and being male or female.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you so much for this reflection. Yes! we should celebrate our humanity and everything that we each uniquely bring to the table, because we have special abilities and talents, no matter what gender, religion, race, nationality, etc. I appreciate this food for thought! big hugs xox

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I hope I didn’t come across kinda bitchy or whiny there. Fact is I like humans. I like women and I like men, and I think we have wayyyyyy more in common than we have differences.

        Like

  18. I think everyone has their own definition as to what feminism is. I’m not on board with those who believe in abortion and all that, but that’s just one spectrum of it all. I believe in fighting for women because so many people in the world do not see us as equal. When I was growing up, I was often told I could not do things that my YOUNGER brother could do because I was a girl! When I was in high school, I worked at a Quiznos where all the guys hired after me were offered 2 to 3 dollars more an hour because my bosses were super racist and sexist. When I asked them for a raise that was equal to my coworkers, they literally told me I was too small and weak and not valuable to the team. I quit immediately! I’ve also been harassed just walking down the street in a t-shirt and jeans, and when I ignore the cat calls, I’m called a bitch! Do men have to deal with that? Not usually. I may not agree with all the reasons as to why women feel they need to march and protest, but I support my fellow women in their fight to show the world that we are equal and that we deserve respect!

    Liked by 4 people

    1. Thank you for sharing this, Emmy. I appreciate the perspective. Yeah, that’s not fair about your wage inequality. Again, there are still some issues that need to be resolved, fair pay being one of them. And I can definitely relate to the street calls – in NYC if you’re female that can walk on two legs, you get catcalled. we need a change in culture where that is no longer acceptable. Respect is a non-negotiable….no matter who, what, where, when, etc. Thanks for the great food for thought. i sincerely appreciate it! hugs to you xoxo 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yeah, definitely! But I also agree with you that ultimately, change needs to start with us within our culture. My son is only 6, but I do my best to raise him to be respectful. Luckily, my husband is an amazing example for our son, and unfortunately, not all boys have a great father figure to look up to (and that’s a whole other subject on what’s wrong with our society !!) Anyways, great insight! Have a great day!

        Like

  19. Hi bbb, just getting back into the dating mess,,, ah, er, mix, yes that’s it after the scarlet “D” divorce, and after a few tries it seems I do not want to get entangles in the whole High School drama thing again. Thank you for the hope of maybe being fortunate enough to meet a like minded woman. It is a mess out there. Hope you find your Godly man. I at least think I have an eye half open for an elusive woman who is kind and loves God deeply.

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Awesome post! You are right on all counts. I truly believe that men are just absolutely confused as to what women want from them because there are so many signals all shooting different places. I also understand the women’s argument on that we should “control” our bodies and I have never heard it put so beautifully as you did, abortion IS to control the body of another. And if they would take a moment and see just how girls and women are treated in many countries and cultures they would know just how blessed we are. We desperately need a move back to the sanctity of marriage, I really believe much of this rage and hate stems from young women who have really felt pressured by society into sexual relationships, one after another, because society says that is what people are “supposed” to do and then they are left hurt, and wounded because something that was designed of God to be precious has been lost.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks so much for this thoughtful reflection, Nina. I think you’re right – we are so incredibly blessed here in the United States. And you’re right, that preciousness or perhaps innocence – has been lost, be it by peer pressure, what society dictates, or what pop culture demands, but it has been lost and that is a very sad thing. thanks for stopping by! hugs xx

      Liked by 2 people

  21. Dear Caralyn:

    I was at a forum on resource exploitation. The presenter held capitalism as the cause of that evil. In the Q&A, I was pointed out that his definition of capitalism read like it was written by the Soviet Politburo.

    I’m having somewhat the same reaction to your piece.

    Feminism is an attempt to elevate issues that historically were considered to be in the home, often managed by women without compensation. On the seamier side we have sexual exploitation and abuse, but it doesn’t stop there. It also has to do with the long-term social consequences of policies that place enormous stress on families. An example might be corporate welfare justified by the economic elite under the rubric “poor people are just lazy,” but it includes the failure to recognize the positive impact of parental leave in cementing family bonds.

    Historically women “made do” when these problems came up. I think that “feminism” as understood by its founders meant making these issues part of the public debate, in part to ensure that problems were not exacerbated by legislatures whose concerns were focused by lobbyists for moneyed interest. Such self-serving policy-makers hypocritically claim common cause with Christian middle-America, many of whom are under stress enough without upending the social contract that supported men as sole breadwinners.

    Your selection of issues is familiar from conservative think tanks interested largely in delegitimizing feminism. I think that even the original feminists had a far more nuanced view. If they sometimes chose issues that seem prurient now (“Free the nipple” was mentioned above), that should be seen as taking a page from Mohandas Ghandi, who led a salt march and spun his own cloth in protest against British monopolies. The feminists weren’t about showing nipples. They chose a universal aspect of the female experience with the goal of encouraging women to be comfortable with their bodies, rather than allowing corporate America to profit from the insecurities instilled by Madison Avenue. Given that many of the teenage girls in my son’s high-school class went in for breast augmentations, I believe that we still have a great need for the feminism (properly understood).

    Brian

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you so much, Brian, for this thoughtful response. There’s a lot of truly terrific food for thought here. I agree, that making these issue part of the debate is important, especially for change. Thanks for stopping by and sharing this perspective!! hugs xox

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Sorry if I went over-the-top, Caralyn. I get a little crazy sometimes. I try to see what is good in every situation, and can become a little unhinged when the emphasis is placed on what is in the shadows.

        Like

    2. And that’s super interesting about Ghandi. I did not know that about his march. I really puts a different spin on the whole “propaganda” aspect of it. Clearly, your words and ideas here are still spinning around my brain as I’m falling asleep 🙂 haha

      Liked by 1 person

  22. Feminism like race is a social construct. Or better, its promotion is creating a separate race and losing its conscious effort toward the inclusion of women in society on all levels. Like, similar efforts of inclusion from other activists. Can all women receive healthcare centered toward women? I agree, they are different mammals. Can all women really make it to college and represent all women in professional careers? Most graduate programs are slowly churning the single digits for females and even worse is wasting 8 years and a quarter million on education and not able to get a job. We accept a social contract as Americans and if you are not “American” in look, traditions, or social standing you are behind and just, unnecessary. That’s what a lot of these protests are considering and I agree that abortion is not accepted in Christianity but neither was accepted slavery, favored classism, passes for plundering plutocrats, abuse toward women, and polygamy even though the church did allow all these ideas because of the social contract of the time between the church and its people or relieving these chosen few of their money in support of the church and their causes. To counter feminism is okay, I would like a better world for my daughters that includes them because it sure didn’t include me.

    Like

    1. thank you for this great food for thought. lots of great points to ponder here. I would love a better world for our children too. theres a lot that society dictates that i wish we could change. one day hopefully. thanks for stopping by. hugs ox

      Like

      1. My mom was raped. I didn’t ask to be born. She didn’t have the money for an abortion so she left when I was born. I’m glad you had a pretty good life, college, apartment in Manhattan…just be aware of not being too self righteous to those that do no walk your path. That, is probably the biggest problem with society is it requires a bit more responsibility among the poor and a bit less patronizing at the top.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Gosh, Kenzie. That just breaks my heart to hear what your mother went through. I am so sorry to hear that. You’re right, there are a lot of things that I haven’t personally experienced. My sincerest apologies if this came of as insensitive. That was truly not my intent. We all have different journeys and every encounter presents an opportunity for compassion and growth 🙂 and i for one, am glad that you are part of this world and alive to share your powerful thoughts and perspective. i am grateful to have you in my life! hugs xox

        Like

      5. I think Kenzie and Brian elevated my thinking. I believe the ‘feminism’ we react negatively too is a manipulation by the media etc to derail and deflect from the issues at hand. Instinctively I reacted to the post getting into the idea yes, there are I,prove wants so why all this agitation. But the fact remains, more women are compromised, subjugated, marginalized that we like to think, and the ongoing presence of this ‘agitation’ in our midst is a clear indication of this. If we all sign up in principle to the idea of inequity, just like we would with ‘racism’ etc then we get somewhere. But to pick on certain issues like ‘for’ or ‘against’ abortion or ‘marriage’ versus ‘co-habitation’ then we focus ‘personal choices’ rather than on systemic and societal inequities. So in principle we have to battle with the the problematic word ‘feminism’ and remember at its core it is about injustice and inequity. All of us therefore could agree on that.

        Like

  24. You go, girl! I’ve been a vocal critic of modern day feminism mainly for my pro-life convictions and I’ve gotten tons of literal, visceral hate for it, so I wanted to leave you a positive comment and to show everyone like us that we aren’t alone.

    Like

    1. Thank you so much rebecca! oh gosh, I’m so sorry that you’ve been receiving backlash for your beliefs. sending big hugs. hang in there. I really appreciate the encouragement. You’re right, holding these beliefs today can definitely be a nerve-wracking thing!big hugs xo

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You are welcome! 🙂 Haha don’t worry about it, I’m alright. Good luck on this post, I’ll be praying it stays civil! ❤ Thank you for the hugs, back atcha! 🙂

        Like

  25. Excellent post, BBB. Ironically, we both posted an article on feminism within minutes of one another! (I will refrain from unabashadely posting a link to it here.) We absolutely need to here more voices like yours on this topic. Blessings 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  26. Somehow I think you are missing the point, although much of what you write is quite true. I appreciate your writing very much even though I often disagree with the “politics”. However. The truth is that despite it being a fabulous thing, having children is something that has been used to keep women under control for a long time. In terms of having a viable world? and healthy children? having no ability to restrict pregnancy does not produce a positive result, either. Poor child health and nutrition is a HUGE problem, and nobody really seems to be talking about that. I guess abortion is more “exciting”. Having reproductive control over herself, and not having some male or insurance company decide what can be done, is crucial to a woman being able to, in many cases, support herself and the family she chooses to have. If you disagree with abortion, that’s fine and you should not have one. But I do not believe it gives you the right to prevent others following their own dictates. There can be concern with late term abortions, for sure. But early term abortions are not terminations of viable human beings, which makes blanket rejection a somewhat specious argument. I generally wonder what people’s positions on the death penalty are, too, when abortion is a question. Also. Women ARE under attack. The pay inequity is stark. The opportunities are, in truth, limited. Health care, child care, basic things like that? are not available to many- it’s all a matter of money and who has it. You may not yet have had your fill of salacious remarks, inappropriate touching, (and not related to provocative dress, to be clear) dismissal of ideas and contributions and downright rip off of same in combination with being trundled off to second class work world unless total obedience to the paradigm is manifested- but all that exists and is getting stronger, and serves no one. Feminism, like every other -ism, and language in general now, gets distorted unimaginably. But women ARE a dispossessed group in many ways and feminism seeks- or should, anyway- to educate everyone in order to rectify a dysfunctional situation. Oppression of women allows men to not be who and what they are, as well. Enabling people to stoop to every occasion is not a recipe for success. I also agree that stridency, name calling, isolationism and intolerance are not acceptable in ANY venue. Patriarchy has been, to say the least, debased over the centuries and it doesn’t serve the highest interests of men OR women. This is what needs to change, and what I believe the essence of feminist action truly is. Responding to your point of view as well, I think the essence of what Christ tells us is: love is the way. Let’s hope we can work on all this together!

    Liked by 4 people

    1. Thank you so much for joining the dialogue and sharing your thoughts so eloquently. I truly appreciate hearing all sides and learning from others! In terms of abortion, for me it goes down to my belief that life begins at conception, therefore, no matter if the abortion is partial birth, 2 weeks or even a “Plan B” pill, for me it does not matter because life is life. But I respect that other people do not hold that belief, and that’s okay. Also, one thing that I didn’t add in my post, is that I have actually been sexually assaulted. So I have experienced the malicious degradation of women first hand. But I’m right there with ya on that: love *is* the way. And there in lies the hope 🙂 I have so appreciated hearing your views and perspective. Thank you for taking the time to read! big hugs xox

      Like

  27. I’m going to have to respectfully disagree with you. Women are definitely marginalized in the US. It’s not just a pay gap, it’s the fact that women don’t receive the same opportunities as men. Yes 57% of women are college students, but a majority of those women never make it into STEM positions. Technology is a male-dominated field, I would know, I live in a technology-dominated area. Women don’t get casted to direct action movies. And that’s just women who aren’t POC or part of the LGBT community. It’s even worse for those women. That’s why intersectional feminism matters.

    Traditional female representation is pathetic. It depicts women solely as objects of male desire which brings me to your point about women “sexualizing” themselves. That’s not what it’s about. A traditional view about women is that women dress up to impress men and that isn’t the case. Plenty of women dress up for themselves and that’s okay.

    Lastly, to your point about abortion, I firmly believe it’s a woman’s right to choose whether she has a baby or not. It impacts HER body because SHE has to eat for two for 8 months, SHE has to go through morning sickness and hormones for 8 months, SHE is considered legally disabled while pregnant. Pregnant can and does destroy teenage girl’s lives. That’s why they need access to abortion and illegalizing abortion doesn’t just magically make it go away. Women just try to abort the baby by themselves and they could get very badly hurt.

    Liked by 5 people

    1. Hey girlie! Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and joining the dialogue. You bring up a lot of really great points. Yeah, there are definitely a lot of areas that need improvement in terms of equality. And I fully appreciate that I’m saying these things as a caucasian female. There are lots of things I have not personally experienced, and i agree, all people, no matter gender, race, orientation, nationality, etc, *all* people deserve respect and equality and dignity and to feel welcome and valued. Lots of great things to ponder here. thanks for stopping by and I hope you have a great rest of your night! hugs xox

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You’re welcome 😊 thanks for taking the time to listen. I really didn’t want to offend anyone, just wanted to air my thoughts.

        Like

      2. Absolutely! I sincerely value the dialogue! i appreciate hearing all different viewpoints. that’s one of the beautiful things about life, is that we can share different beliefs and yet still respect each other and be friends! 🙂

        Liked by 2 people

      3. Yeah that’s the best part. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate having you as a friend even though we don’t see eye to eye on everything. It’s really powerful. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      5. Beautybeyondbones you are a feminist and dont even know it. Feminism is fighting for equality. Thats all. So even though its come to mean many things we need to bring back the true meaning of feminism and show people what it means to be a feminist and bring more equality in the world

        Like

    3. I think if our goal is to increase the amount of women in STEM fields that means we make sure they are adequately prepared for such a track while they are still in high school…that is a whole other discussion though.
      May I ask how you think women are legally disabled while pregnant?

      Like

  28. Just because you aren’t feeling or witnesses the effects of why we need feminism doesn’t mean it isn’t happening.
    On paper, we all have EQUAL rights. Sadly, reality tells a much different story.
    How people are treated for just being a minority or a woman is atrocious. The United States is ruled by old, white men who are out of touch with reality.
    I was sexually harassed at a place of work years ago by the boss/owner of company. You know what the general consensus was by my recruiting company/counselor/co-workers? I was wearing something that “showed the shape” of my breasts.
    Yes, blouses that completely cover my chest and were plain somehow made this boss of mine bold enough to make comments and stare at my chest for long periods of time (I was the admin assistant/front desk person). I caught him many times and asked him what he was doing. No answer, kept staring. I quit. I fought a mental battle with myself and hated myself.
    But that isn’t a unique story: this happens to so many women (and men, too).
    Now please, not all men are like this and not all women are constantly angry or threaten/feel threatened by men. What people see when they see feminists on TV is anger and marches; rarely do you see the why’s (or choose not to).
    Words like “triggered” get thrown around every time a woman has an opinion that isn’t the general consensus.
    It’s fine to have religious beliefs and/or be pro-life; after all, your body is your body! But…in no way, shape or form does anyone have the right to tell another person what to do with their body. More to the point, some of these politicians have zero knowledge of the female anatomy. Some of them actually believe we can hold in our blood and make it come out at will. I don’t want that moron to be in charge of what he clearly knows nothing about nor care (or the life a goldfish, for that matter).
    But above everything else I’ve seen on this particular post is the men agreeing with the idea feminism is overrated. It’s almost funny, if not a little sad.
    Of course they agree; they have all this privilege and never had to think what others are thinking or feeling or, GASP, what other people might be going through.
    They give men with intelligence and common sense a horrendous name. No, it’s more scary than anything else, come to think of it.
    I don’t care what religion or lack of anyone has: don’t hide behind any deity(ies) to justify ignorance or bring others down. Don’t hide behind religion and dictate why certain people need to be treated differently.
    But, when I also see stuff like this, I have a small sigh of relief. I genuinely don’t want anyone to go through what I’ve gone through. The story is just the tip of the iceberg. I used to have the same opinions, like “we don’t need feminism” and think it was all in someone’s misguided head.
    So, I hope you keep your misconceptions about feminism. I hope you never have to see and experience what myself and so many others go through. I applaud you for having your opinion, even if we disagree.

    Liked by 6 people

    1. Hi Alleh, thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and perspective on this. I can tell you are very passionate about these things, and I definitely respect your opinions and beliefs, and I thank you for joining the dialogue. I’m so sorry that you experienced that at your office. That type of harassment is never okay. And I’m so sorry it led to those challenges you described. I have been there too. I was sexually assaulted at a night club in NYC several years ago. So I too, know the ugly side of dominating masculinity. One thing about being uniquely feminine women is that we take those special traits with us into every role we fill, every relationship we have, and every conversation we participate in, and I can definitely see your passion and strength, empathy and compassion shine through! Thanks again for stopping by. big hugs xox

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Very true. I’m so sorry that happened to you. Hope you’re doing okay! I know with we’re alone with our feelings sometimes, things can take a dark turn.

        Like

  29. I appreciate your willingness to take a risk and start a conversation of this nature. You made some good points, and you explained them well. I am aware that a significant segment of our culture needs to improve its attitudes towards women, but your perspective helps to provide a balance.

    Liked by 1 person

  30. I had to agree with everything except being disappointed with being a female. I own my femininity, and am not shy (especially when backed into a corner, which is how I feel these days) about reminding people of the true roots of feminism – equal pay for equal work, and equal rights (to include the right to vote and ability to leave the house without a male escort).

    I am disheartened by the women protesting in America, simply because I have done my research – and women in America aren’t, as you point out, marginalized *or* oppressed. Other countries still subject women to genital mutilation, marry off child brides to men four times their age, and one country in particular still does not allow women to take a walk without a male relative escort… and, the last one is a country which the U.S. routinely allies herself with.

    So, when I compare the marches to true atrocities against women – for being women – I fail to find much sympathy for their plight. If they were demonstrating for the women oppressed in other countries, urging the U.S. do something for *those* women, that is a cause I would find a little more substantive.

    Great points, and you are not alone in these thoughts!

    Like

    1. Thanks so much Anni! I really appreciate you sharing your thoughts. You’re so right – there are other countries around the world where those horrible conditions are a reality for women. We have so much to be thankful for. Let’s celebrate all the freedoms that we enjoy as wonderful and powerful females! hugs xox

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I am sure you had some backlash, but if I am really, gut-wrenchingly honest, there’s a darker side to the coin of feminism. Sure, we can have good jobs and provide for our families now. But on the other side of that, the commonality of a dual-income family has made it much harder for women who choose to stay at home and raise (even school) their children. Some women cannot, and others can but end up filling both roles. Childbearing is so, so incredibly special (and to be honest, somewhat important for, you know, survival of the race and all that), but I know so many women who feel that they have had to choose between raising their children and conveniences like feeding and providing medical care for said children. Pros and cons to everything for sure!

        Liked by 2 people

      2. This is a great perspective too. You’re right, there are pros and cons, and every situation is different. but one thing is for sure: whatever vocation or profession we choose, we bring to it our unique feminine traits. thanks again for the support. hugs xox

        Liked by 1 person

  33. I completely understand why you may be confused about all the attention on feminism lately. I want to shed some light on how I feel about feminism and what it means for our culture today. I am going to try and take this issue by issue as you lay it out in your post, so bear with me.
    Women are marginalized in the United States. Whether you want to believe that or not, it’s the truth. One example is the dollar bill. Every single dollar bill that is made in America has the face of a man. What about the great women who helped shape America? What about the notable women who changed history? Why is it that men are so important but women get forgotten?
    Another example are veterans. Surveys show that women veterans are less likely than their male counterparts to find employment after service. Female veterans have written on Vantage Point (http://www.blogs.va.gov/VAntage/7887/progress-in-treatment-of-women-veterans/) about these challenges and those while seeking VA care as a woman.
    Another example are the gender pay gaps. All you have to do is google a few things to realize this is a troubling problem in America. I learned, by googling really quickly, that women who are chief executives earn 69% as much as their male counterparts. And on average women earn more than men in only 7 professions out of 534. SEVEN OUT OF 534. That is 0.13% of the processions listed.
    Abortion bans. I understand you are prolife and I am not going to argue this with you. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. The problem I see with abortion bans and all the hoops women have to jump through is that we as women are still not trusted to make our own decisions about our reproductive choices.
    Now, on to the fact that we can wear anything, say anything, go out in public, go to college, etc. You’re right, we can do all of those things. Because of women like Alice Paul, Francis Willard, Carrie A. Nation, Jane Addams, Fannie Lou Hamer, Rosa Parks, Betty Friedan, Margaret Sanger, Anna Howard Shaw, and Carrie Chapman Catt. And if you know anything about women’s history, the Progressive Movement, the Feminist Movement of the ‘60s, and the Civil Rights Movement you will know that these women are the reason we have birth control, can vote, have equal rights, etc. These women didn’t all agree. Some wanted temperance while some drank. Some wanted birth control while some were strictly opposed. And some were racist while others were inclusive. Feminists may not always agree but we are all fighting for equal rights. We are the ones that are standing up for those who can’t or won’t.
    I agree with you, that marching will not end rape and we need a change in our culture. But I disagree with the fact that women should wear more conservative clothing. By you saying “if we’re going to walk out of the house in lingerie-equivalent club wear, it’s asking for trouble.” you are telling anyone who reads this that it is their fault they got raped because they wanted to wear a backless dress. You even follow it up that “”Asking for it” is never an excuse” but that’s what you’re saying by telling your readers they are asking for trouble if they are dressed a little skimpy. That’s bull shit. I should be able to walk down the street topless, just like a man, without feeling any sort of discomfort, ridicule, judgement, or terror.
    The abortion subject is touchy and I don’t like to argue this issue. My husband is very pro-life and I have had two abortions. I would never take those back. I do not regret them. I would never judge someone who has had one. I would never judge someone who refuses to have one. All I want is the choice. Because I didn’t have that choice I would have gone to a back alley doctor, like back in the 20’s. I could have died tried to get the abortion I wanted and had a right to.
    Feminism is not about sexual revolution and the pill. It is not to have sexual freedom. Feminism is to have equal rights. To be treated equally on all platforms. The ability to have children is uniquely female, but it should also be a choice. We should not be forced to have children or denied birth control because a man chooses that is what is “right.” I obviously do not believe that “child in the womb” is actually a child until a certain point, but again this is not a fight I want to get into. We can disagree and that’s fine. That’s part of being a feminist. Letting everyone have their own thoughts and ideas and not judging or criticizing them for it.
    I’m sorry you feel that the whole feminist movement thing “smells of domineering, desperate estrogen” but please, take a minute and research women like Alice Paul, Margaret Sanger, Anna Howard Shaw, Carrie Chapman Catt, Francis Willard, Betty Friedan, and Jane Addams. Once you’ve done that tell me how many rights you would have as a woman without these strong and courageous women. You wouldn’t have your blog. You wouldn’t have a job. You wouldn’t have education. You wouldn’t have the right to choose when to have children. You wouldn’t have the right to own land. You wouldn’t have the right to vote. You would not have a voice what so ever. You would have been property of your father or husband. You would have been taught to be seen and not heard. These women made all of this possible by being feminist. By fighting for what they believed what right and going against the grain.
    If you feel it’s unnatural to try and dominate a man you fall into the typical paradigm that our culture has taught. You complain about our culture calling women bitches and hoes, why not complain about our culture teaching our young girls that they are below boys. Why not complain about the saying “boys will be boys” and letting them be aggressive, dirty, rude, loud, mean, etc. because, “boys will be boys.”
    As a mother I do not feel that being a bearer to life is what makes me powerful. Being educated, talented, funny, strong, independent, outspoken, honest, a good person, a good mother, a good wife, a good friend, and a good daughter are what makes me powerful. Not the fact that I can simply have children.
    I hope you never have to experience rape, unwanted pregnancy, assault, name calling, or have any of your rights taken away. These are the things that make you open your eyes to “what all the fuss is about”.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. If I may —
      You brought up some excellent points. Obviously, I don’t know exactly what she was thinking, but this is what I interpret some of the things that you did not agree with:
      I gathered that she is fed up with present-day feminism. The kind that doesn’t seem to be fighting so much for equal rights because, really, we have so many equal rights today. (I agree that this has to do with the rise of feminism in the last century).
      Pay gap may be an issue still, but how is taking a day off work to march for your right to earn a paycheck logical?
      As for the dollar bill — it has taken a while to change things, but I have never seen the face on any denomination change in my lifetime (that I can recall) and I know that the decision to put Harriet Tubman — a wonderful leader — on our $20 bill has already been established.
      That’s a huge step — one that probably had nothing to do with the women’s marches in DC.

      I also wanted to bring up the dress thing. I think her main point was, how do you expect someone to respect your body if you don’t respect it yourself? The female body is hyper-sexualized in tv, advertisements, music, etc. We know this. Choosing to wear nearly nothing because it should be a “right” in a culture that is so perverse when it comes to women probably isn’t wise. It has nothing to do with rights — only social and cultural attitudes (as mentioned above).
      I do believe that if we want to see change, we should stop objectifying women — especially media. I do not call this feminism, though. This falls under basic human decency.

      I don’t say this as an argument, simply as a discussion. Hope I haven’t offended. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. No offense here at all. 🙂

        There are still problems with men seeing us as equal and even as women seeing themselves as equal. She makes that very clear when she states that men should be the breadwinners. There is nowhere in our genetic make-up that makes men better at working than women. There is nowhere in our DNA where women should be considered soft and men should be considered strong. Those are all gender roles and stereotypes we have fallen into.

        I agree that it has taken a long time to make any sort of positive change for women when it comes to currency, but the small wins are very positive.

        And when it comes to the dressing I will politely disagree. I have a lot of tattoos that I love to show off. I am proud of the artwork on my body and enjoy showing it off. I should not be scared I’m going to be raped because I have a backless dress on. It should not be assumed that I don’t respect my body because I wear low cut clothing and short shorts. – Or whatever the clothing type may be. But I agree completely that objectifying women in our culture through the media is not feminism. It’s our culture, it’s something that needs to be changed but to do this our attitudes towards sex and the body (both male and female because they are sexualized too) need to change.

        Like

      2. Thanks so much for this, Samantha! You’re right, there is a lot of room for improvement, but you’re right — there is no crisis. steps are being taken, like on the dollar bill and the equal opportunities available to women. And you’re right, i was hoping to create a dialogue. every person brings with them unique perspectives and insights, and i am truly grateful to learn from everyone. Thanks for stopping by 🙂 big hugs xx

        Like

    2. Hi there, thank you so much for joining the dialogue and for sharing your thoughts and perspective. I love the passion with which you write about these issues, and I sincerely appreciate you sharing them. There is so much to be learned from each and every person and I am incredibly grateful to have the opportunity to do so. I am very grateful for the work the women who went before us did to ensure that we have the rights and freedoms that we enjoy today. Feminism is a complex issue, and there are many sides and approaches to it. There is obviously room for improvement in our culture around these issues, but i think there is a lot to be grateful for too. And again, I respect everyone’s stances and positions on these issues. We’re all coming from different places that make us feel and believe the way we do. For me, the sexual assault in my past, coupled with the anorexia in my past and the fact that I am unable to have children is what influences my positions on these issues. I was hoping to create a dialogue, because these are not cut and dry issues, and respectful conversation can lead to understanding and healing 🙂 Anyways, this is getting long, so thank you so much for sharing your heart. it really means a lot 🙂 big hugs xox

      Liked by 1 person

  34. I have so many thoughts on this as well. However, all I will say is this also confuses young men who we moms try to teach to be gentlemen. You know, the “old-fashioned” open the door for a woman (let her go in first) out of respect and so on. Our young men are getting mixed signals because some young women get offended or give the men a stink eye for being courteous and respectful. There is nothing wrong with manners and putting yourself ahead of others (man or woman) but this whole movement is going to bite us all in the end. Not only are women confused by all of this “movement” but some men are as well.

    Like

    1. Thanks Deanna! You’re so right, I feel, as a society, we’re walking on egg shells so as not to offend or send the wrong signals. I for one love a held door, but I know others who feel the opposite. So much to be confused about. Thanks for stopping by and sharing your thoughts! big hugs xox

      Like

  36. Yes yes yes! Thank you for writing about this and approaching it from another angle than so many others I read about these days. I completely agree with you.
    Except for the shoulder pads – I don’t mind those so much as the re-emerging mom jeans trend — could someone explain that to me?? 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    1. thank you so much Samantha! I really appreciate your support and encouragement. haha oh gosh, the mom jeans — yeah, I’m not quite sure about that one either. 🙂 Thanks for taking the time to read! big hugs xox

      Liked by 1 person

  37. Never dismiss as fiction the struggles others face simply because you have not faced them. You lost me at wanting women to take some responsibility for sexual assault in I suppose some percentage related to the amount of our bodies that are not covered. You can say “I’m not saying she was asking for it” but you absolutely said asking for trouble. Having been sexually assaulted in broad daylight at age 16 wearing knee length shorts while walking in a park with a friend, what percentage of the blame would you assign to me based on the amount of clothing I was wearing? I have many thoughts on feminism but if you are still in that place where maybe sometimes we bring our own rapes on ourselves, it feels useless to discuss it more deeply.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi there, thank you so much for joining the dialogue, and for sharing your thoughts. You’re right, all of our journeys are different, and we have a lot to learn from each other. I am so sorry to hear that you’ve been assaulted as so. That breaks my heart to hear, and my heart and prayers and love goes out to you. And I’m sorry that you took my words as that, they were absolutely not meant in that way. I too, was sexually assaulted. It happened my 3rd year in NYC at a night club. So I agree – we did not bring those things on ourselves. I would love to continue the dialogue on this. I so appreciate you sharing your story and your thoughts. sending big hugs xox

      Like

  38. You have turned a corner here, BB, this a serious look at this topic and an intelligent piece of writing.
    It shows the strength of your courage to stand up for your convictions, your reasoning, wisdom, and ability to communicate clearly, making you truly an example of Paul’s advice to Timothy, ‘let not anyone despise your youth’.
    I think your writing gift is headed for great things as you keep being true to yourself.
    God Bless, and keep blessing us your audience. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  39. Wow, I have not seen writing like this in a long time. I so appreciate your views here, including pro-life. But there is a need to discuss and make known one important topic. It’s called domestic violence. Most often it’s against women. I doubt if you see it, but if you go down to your local police station and get a copy of the stats you will see horrendous numbers crossing socio-economic lines.
    But is so refreshing to see your perspective, and seeing the views of a Godly woman.
    And your glasses! ☺lol.

    Like

    1. Thank you so much for this thoughtful response. domestic violence absolutely breaks my heart. It pains my heart to think about the women who have to endure that vile conduct. I have been blessed to have been brought up in a home where that is not an issue, but i fully realize that that is not the case for everyone. And my heart and prayers go out to those women and families. Violence against another person, is never *ever* the answer. Thanks for this powerful perspective. I appreciate you joining the dialogue! Big hugs to you xox

      Liked by 1 person

  40. Definitely some of the longest comments on here in a while! Of course you knew this was coming, pro and con! I have to applaud both your courage in tackling issues that are sure to draw reactions and your ability to express appreciation for other people speaking their mind. Very well done. Direct comments at Patreon… where everyone should go anyway!!

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Thanks Jeff! I know! my eyes are getting a workout reading! between that and trying to watch Dancing with the Stars out of the other eye! haha Yes, Mr. Level Headed 🙂 haha just like my dad 🙂 pros and cons for sure. can’t wait to read your thoughts! you always bring such a powerful perspective! i always end up learning so much 🙂 big hugs xox

      Liked by 1 person

      3. I have to root for Mr. T! I watched The A Team when that series was on. George Peppard was a hoot; smoking a cigar and always saying, “I love it when a plan comes together.” I’m glad to see Peta back. A regular family affair with her and the brothers, then Sasha and his wife. I daydream about being able to do that, but despite doing fight choreography in theatre, add music, call it “dance,” and watch the hilarity begin. *sigh*

        Like

      4. hahah that fight choreo is no joke! it really is a well choreographed dance!! 🙂 Yeah, his dance was pretty awesome. Never saw any productions he was in, but I’ll take your word for it! maybe i can find a clip online 🙂 hugs xo

        Liked by 1 person

  42. I grew up in Norway where women’s equality and rights was something I kind of took for granted. Women have also stood strong in Norway, I think has to do with our Viking heritage where women were both Warriors and home makers, adventurers and mothers, priests and wives.

    But, when I moved to India, I realized that this is a country where things I take for granted doesn’t even exist. Here, a woman can’t inherit, she can’t choose her spouse, she is auctioned away for dowry, and, after marriage, she has to change her entire name to show that she is the property of her husband. Of course modern India is changing, but it is still against the law her do reveal the gender of a baby on an ultrasound screening because so many women choose to have an abortion if it is a girl. So I guess here, old-school feminism is needed, I mean the feminism that fights for equal rights and worth for women.

    But I think, all in all, I am a bit of a humanist (is that a word….). What I mean is that I believe in every single individual’s rights to define themselves, to be the way they find natural and to act according to their own convictions. I don’t like labels. I don’t like when someone else tries to define my personal womanhood, how I am supposed to be to be a woman, wether that is coy and sweet or “bad ass”. I just want to be myself.

    Having said that, I think there are discussions we need to have about values. Here in India for example, many women say they are grateful for the prostitutes because they reduce the amount of rapes. I mean, WHAT? What they mean is that men have no control over their needs so either they have to molest a girl or buy one. That is, to me, a sick way of looking at what masculinity is. It is the opposite of the protector. So, my point is, here in India, there is need for a re-definition of what it means to be a man. And to me, that definition needs to be about chivalry, and protection and care. But I think, being caring and kind are values we ALL should strive for, and they certainly do not put a lid on personal expression and individuality.

    Like

    1. Thank you so much for sharing this powerful perspective. India was actually one of the countries I was thinking about when I was writing this piece, because they are being so oppressed over there. it breaks my heart and I’m sorry to hear that you have to witness that first hand. Yeah, that is *shocking* about the prostitutes. You’re right – being caring, and just as basic as respect is something that everyone deserves, no matter their gender, race, age, nationality – respect is a non-negotiable. Thanks again for joining the dialogue. big hugs xox

      Like

      1. I am one too. I don’t go for all these marches and protests, I think they are dumb. My faith talks about working for the Lord and in doing so, our lives will be better than what we can make ourselves.

        I never want to be considered part of this women’s movement.

        Liked by 1 person

  44. I find it all a mystery feminism a word that I truly do not wish to be described as. I am unique and say exactly what I mean and fashion , celebrities, do not define me or what I think about. I am a fighter and always have been.

    Liked by 1 person

  45. I wish I could like this post ten times! I’ve been struggling with the whole feminism thing lately, and like many others, I’ve been wondering if I am a feminist or not. This post really helped me figure out where I stand. You’re so amazing, and I am so thankful for your posts. It seems like each one relates to something going on at my life at that time, and I truly think that it’s a God-thing. Thank you so much!

    Liked by 1 person

  46. Oh my goodness! I was literally just reflecting on this while reading this morning….Feeling obligated, as a woman, to be feminist. And what that means for our role in society as women of faith…loved reading about your insight!

    Liked by 1 person

  47. Oh I love this post- as I love all of yours. especially the pro life part. I feel the EXACT same way!

    the ironic thing in this modern world of North America (in from Canada but we are similar in many ways) is that we are supposed to be fighting for the minorities. well those are the unborn children, without a voice!!

    Like

  48. I have to admit, as I first started reading this post I was thinking that this was an anti-feminist post. As I continued to read, I realized that you speak truth. We as women have come far, but our fight is not over. Viagra is covered through health insurance but some birth control methods for females are not…
    Unequal pay in the workplace….
    The topic of abortion is at an all time high, I am pro-life as well. I think it’s wrong to rid yourself of life just because you made the choice to have sex. That’s the choice, not abortion. Agreed! Rape victims, that’s another story. I wish the option for abortions did not exist, but I do not judge those because I am not perfect either. Thank you for sharing this post. I love that you uplift women and document the successes we have made over the years!

    Like

    1. Thank you so much for your encouragement. I appreciate your taking the time to read and response, i know it was a bit on the lengthy side! You’re right, we have a lot to be grateful for, but you’re right, there’s a long way to go. And it’s true, there’s so much talk about abortion right now. i definitely am not perfect either and i have a lot of things in my past that have caused my body and others pain with the anorexia in my past, but that has given me such appreciation for the value of human life. thanks for stopping by and for sharing your thoughts. big hugs to you xo

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You are certainly welcome. Yes, we all have a story. Please check out my reblog of this post! I would love your feedback! You have got a follower in me!

        Like

  49. I enjoy some of your posts, probably most of them, but not this thread. It suggests that you have experienced a relatively sheltered life, and simply have no clue about the rest of the US, much less the world.

    A good portion of this country is still in the early 1900s, and some of it craves for the early 1800s from a social perspective — and that means treating women as property, and beating your spouse to where she requires a doctor is a $25 misdemeanor, if there is an arrest at all. (Yes, I can cite recent examples for this, and I’m not kidding about the penalty. As one abuser said, the entertainment value was worth the $25.)

    Some of the facts are obvious and well known, or should be:
    (1) Women are paid roughly 2/3 of what men get for the same jobs.
    (2) Women are underrepresented in the C-suite in major companies.
    (3) Women cannot become President of the US. They can hold that position in other countries, but enough people will vote against them in the US simply based on gender to prevent them from winning. That was one of a number of factors working against Clinton in the last election, and a factor in analysts saying that any MALE candidate would have won against trump.
    (4) The US is behind most other industrialized countries on maternity leave practices. For example, The Netherlands gives women 16 weeks of leave at 100% pay even if the mother is self-employed, plus a home health aide. Where exactly in the US can you find that? (OK, if you are a member of Congress, maybe.)

    Domestic violence and incest are far more common in the US than most people are willing to acknowledge. There’s a lot of work to be done. If you haven’t seen it, you need to look more carefully. Even in affluent areas, it’s all around you. Who’s wearing dark glasses when they aren’t needed? Who has a little too much makeup? Long sleeves on a hot day? LOOK.

    I’ve no patient for symbolic politics. I don’t care whose face is on the dollar bill. I care about the physical and mental well-being of people. Anything that distracts from that or that might take resources away from that is at least annoying and at worst horrific.

    The Declaration of Independence promised “Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness.” If people don’t have the opportunity for that, it’s a problem. If the problem results from their own bad decisions, well, can’t do much about that. But if the problem is based on skin color, accent, gender, sexual preference (which I don’t see as a choice), that’s something that needs to be fixed.

    I also disagree with you on maternity choice. The is no role for the government in someone’s womb. What she does is between herself and her Deity. If Congress can tell you that you cannot abort a fetus, someday Congress could change and will be able to tell you that you can only have one child and have to abort the rest. Do you really want to give the government that power?

    (I lose patience with so-called “right to life” people. They show no sign of caring for what happens to the child after it is born, so it’s not life they care about, just birth. And they don’t want to pay extra taxes to help the babies abandoned at firehouses.)

    Instead, one of the key issues of the century is what to do with the workers whose jobs are being killed by automation. Are we going to see women with low education pushed into sex work? Store cashiers, restaurant workers, drivers, some medical positions — those jobs are going away. What will happen to the people doing those jobs? That’s going to be a gender battle, when people wake to it.

    There are a lot of very real issues that will be addressed in the next decade. Whose face is on the dollar bill isn’t one of them. What you do with your womb shouldn’t be one of them.

    Liked by 4 people

    1. I would essentially agree with you and add a couple thoughts:

      Pretty sure that true feminism isn’t about dominating a man and emasculating him but I do recall that argument was used to try and keep women from voting and essentially being treated as human beings instead of property.

      I think we can be pro-life – for all life and not just fetuses – and still give women choice. Apparently some states are allowing rapists to sue victims to keep them from aborting the baby created from the rape. Somewhere in there we need to allow for hard choices to be made.

      I’m not an expert in these matters but I think the advances we see are tempered by sad realities. For example, while more women are in university I believe that the fewer men get more of the jobs and then are often paid more for the same work as a woman is doing (very capably usually).

      While more opportunities exist now than ever before I believe feminists see the significant inequalities across society between men and women and the violence against females of all ages as intricacy linked. One begets the other.

      Liked by 2 people

      1. thanks brad, for adding to this dialogue. again, i am grateful to hear from every viewpoint and side. everyone comes to the table, bringing with them their own experiences and perspectives, which then influences their beliefs and positions. There is obviously room for improvement, and these issues are not cut and dry. theres a lot of gray area to navigate, and coming together and hearing everyone leads to respect and understanding. (I think i just mixed 3 metaphors there 🙂 ) But thank you for this insightful contribution. I really appreciate it! hugs xox

        Liked by 1 person

    2. Hi Vic, thank you for sharing this response. i appreciate you joining the dialogue and for adding your thoughts. it is clear that you are very passionate about your position, and I just want to say, I hear you. I respect every viewpoint and sincerely am grateful to hear all sides of the issues and learn and grow from each and every person. that was a very thoughtful response and i thank you for sharing it. Lots of things to mull over, here. hugs to you xox

      Like

Leave a reply to Apes Cancel reply