The Angry Feminist

Posted on by beautybeyondbones

Warning: this post may be slightly unpopular.

You know what fashion trend I am completely over? Shirts with words on them.

You know what I’m talking about…they’ll have random words like, “How about Tacos” or “#squad” or something like “Laundry Day.” The whole I’m-really-trying-to-look-like-I’m-not-trying look. And listen buddy, you ain’t foolin’ anybody. Just take your poly/cotton blend attempt at irony back to the dumpster fire that is Forever 21 where it belongs.

Sheesh.

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But since I’ve been back in NYC, I’ve noticed the tone of these said “word shirts” have gotten…well…hostile.

And women, I’m looking at us.

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I’ve seen shirts with language such as “No Uterus, No Opinion,” “Not your P####,” “Feminist as F@%#,” “Who Runs the World? Girls,” “F#*%ing Nasty Woman,” and my personal favorite…”She’s Beauty, She’s Grace, She’ll Punch You in the Face.”

Frankly, I’m disgusted.

Listen, I am all for celebrating womanhood and the feminine genius – after all, we are the crown of creation and have so much to offer the world – but when did celebrating womanhood become about absolutely tearing down men?

There’s no excuse for belittling another human being just to elevate oneself. I mean, isn’t that exactly what you’re “fighting” to stop in the first place? Apparently it’s okay to reduce a man’s value and worth and intelligence because it’s in the name of feminism, right?

What message are we sending to children, when our clothing attacks men with profanity and language I certainly wouldn’t want my future children repeating?

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I mean, where’s the line?

And I get it…there are a lot of reasons, especially given recent history, for women to be up in arms. (I’m lookin’ at you, R. Kelly, Donald Trump, Jay Z). And those feelings are valid and important.

But for cryin’ out loud, can’t we take the high road?

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The truth is, men and women are different. We are each a unique reflection of our Maker, and are equal partners in life, in marriage, under the law, in the eyes of God.

But I’m tired of women putting men down just to advance the feminist agenda.

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One of my favorite verses on this is from Col 3:18-19, which gets a bad wrap. It’s all about a wife submitting to her husband. But what gets left out is where the husband gets that very same instruction! And it goes further in 1 Peter 3:7 to say that husbands should treat their wives “with honor as fellow heirs of the gracious gift of life.”

God wants men and women to be a team.

We are to build one another up.

We are to treat one another with respect and dignity – as equal partners.

One of the most powerful things my mom ever said to me was that when you get married, your number one job is to help get your spouse to Heaven.

It’s an equal partnership where the earthly and eternal wellbeing of the other becomes more important then your own.

That’s radical feminism.

That’s the male/female relationship we should strive for.

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I’m going to call it how I see it: this new wave of profane feminism isn’t feminism…it’s bullying. 

And you know what? It needs to stop.

By acting out with such base and vile behavior and language, we’re just as bad as the “mysogyny” we’re fighting against.

It’s the epitome of hypocritical, and honestly, it’s just in bad taste.

I’m just going to leave you with this…you attract more flies with honey than you can with vinegar.

And maybe, if we hold ourselves to the standards of virtue and grace, and humility and honor, then men will take a page from our book, and that respect we’re demanding will be voluntarily given.

So please, enough with the aggression. It doesn’t look good on you, sweetheart.

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beautybeyondbones

BBB: Because we're all recovering from something. // For speaking/business inquiries: beautybeyondbones@yahoo.com

553 thoughts on “The Angry Feminist”

  3. I have to add my favorite to the bunch:

    “Preach the gospel at all times. When necessary, use words.” St. Francis of Assisi

    It applies to so much beyond religion.

    Personally, I believe in wearing tee shirts that represent awesome memories like an amazing concert, vacation, or sporting event in which one participated. But rando slogans purchased from Target, Old Navy, H&M….waste of money.

    Liked by 4 people

  4. Amen! You tell ’em. I’ve had enough of the girl-bullies, too. Women are beautiful, charged with making the world a more beautiful place. Sounds very hippy-dippy, but it’s the truth. Men are our husbands,fathers,son,brothers, half the human race,and Jesus Christ said they were to die for. I try to remember that when I’m ready to strangle one. Men need love and grace, too 🙂

    Liked by 3 people

    1. haha thanks so much – yeah girl bullies…it just doesn’t sit well with me. You’re right! Not hippie-dippy at all! i agree! it’s just like the book, Captivating. Thanks for stopping by and for sharing this great food for thought. big hugs xo

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Captivating is like the best book ever for chicks who just feel like they should be something else. Def a great one!

        Like

  7. Can’t agree more!!! It’s so not a good look and it’s making a huge impression on future generations to come. (Titus 2:3-5)

    Liked by 2 people

  10. One downside of all this is that I honestly have more hesitation approaching women these days. At least outside of Montana.

    I’d like to just be my natural, trying-to-be-courteous self. But it seems different women are prepared to take different things all the wrong ways these days. Open a door for a woman and you’re chauvinist. Don’t open one and you’re rude. Drop a stray word and it will get interpreted all wrong based on the woman’s experience. Venture into a sociopolitically charged conversation with anything but the “right” response and you’re a ___________. Sometimes even TALK to one and I’ve “only got one thing on the brain”.

    Granted, these aren’t anywhere near the majority of encounters, but it’s still vexing. It’d be nice if we could just all relax, instead of dragging down civilization in an attempt to fix it.

    Liked by 7 people

    1. thanks for sharing this Brandon. Yeah, i can only imagine. I’m still all for chivalry, by the way 🙂 hehe don’t change!! you’ll find the right woman who will appreciate your gentlemanly ways 🙂 thanks for stopping by! hugs x

      Liked by 2 people

  12. Caralyn, this is the BEST post I think I’ve ever read on this subject. Thank you so much for putting it out there. I’m going to share this on my FB page and my blog. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Wonderful post. Thank you for your honesty and courage to speak truth, regardless of how the world chooses to react to it. Both women and men should be held in high regard, as equals. Loved as Christ loves His church. Blessings be upon you.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Yes! Thank you!! Support of femininity should not need to include devaluing masculinity! It’s like I tell my children, we need to all be on team human, and try to lift each other up, not tear other down.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Amen! There is too much dissonance in the world today.~ thank you for pointing this out. Seriously why be obstinate when we can be generously amiable. “Be the change you want to see in the world” (some say Gandhi quoted this…others say he did not….. so whoever did I like the quote) Be of peace ~ love your blog! ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  18. I like the way you can take on something with a vengeance and still make sense. Not everyone has that ability. And the passage about submission is sometimes misunderstood. We all submit in different ways in our lives as a choice. And we do it out of love for our Savior. Thanks again for a insightful post with some teeth. You speak the truth out of concern flavored with some frustration. But good mix. Keep writing I will keep reading. Blessings. John

    Liked by 3 people

  19. Amen! I worry greatly about the tone our society is setting, especially by making my group (or myself) feel better by belittling another group. That’s no way to share a sandbox. Thanks for having the courage to stand up and so eloquently state something I’m sure more than you might believe are thinking! Peace, Rich

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Loud applause coming from my corner of the continent! Kindness and class can go along ways in any arena. Thanks for such a true picture of what radical feminism SHOULD look like. Great post.

    Liked by 2 people

  22. Hello Pastor! You have written another thought provoking piece. I think it is about division….elements, with agenda’s on both side prefer we be divided as to not agree with the other side. Also, when will our entire church community accept and encourage women pastors and ministers? Equally capable and the benefit of adding a feminine perspective to the message. We lose half of our most valuable teachers not to mention how it affects their self esteem? Get a ministerial degree and a woman in a church can lead a small group or whatever, but can’t preach God’s Word? Thank you for sharing you!

    Liked by 2 people

    2. Hey Rick, maybe you can point out to some of your similarly gendered friends that in 1 Cor 12, God says that God gives honor to the parts of the body that otherwise lack honor, so that all the parts might recognize their need for each other. I bet if a few guys realized that God says they’re in charge because otherwise the Body would not value them, they’d pass on their leadership roles in a heartbeat.

      Like

  23. Absolutely Accurate !!! I applaud you for pointing to the bad behavior, language, t-shirts, and other forms of communication aimed at putting others down to uplift self. Bravo for writing this !!! Jan

    Liked by 1 person

  25. Fantastic post. I feel very much the same way you do about the angry feminist movement and how hostile it has become. I’m not very happy with this Patriarchal society but there are much better ways at dealing with it and accepting our femininity, and showing it to others in a kind, nurturing way.
    Thank you for this post 🙏

    Liked by 1 person

  26. AMEN SISTER!!! It always annoy me that people want to go on about wives submitting they forget the rest. My favorite is Ephesians. I prefer being a traditional feminist. Modern feminist don’t seem to understand that they are doing more harm than good.

    Liked by 1 person

  27. I’ve written about submission, in a Father’s Day Song Sunday piece. Women will be able to submit to their husbands, ONLY WHEN, their husbands, who are suppose to the head of the household, LIFT THEIR WIVES ABOVE THEMSELVES, as scripture says. (This is as aggressive as I get, no worries : ) ) There is a total divide between men, and women, and it shouldn’t be. Humans were created equal by the hands of God. Different roles? Sure. But there is so much more of a bigger picture going on. I actually like words on shirts/hoodies. But mine more so consist of Live, Laugh, Love, Blessed, or jokes about not having the time to care, and one I really like says, “Check your ego, amigo.” Haha! When we get defensive, and become offensive to others, however. No. It only creates more of a divide. I completely agree with you. Keep sharing your heart! You may lose some, but you will gain others. : ) I support you!

    Liked by 1 person

  29. I agree with you completely! As a gay, married woman, I know about the struggle of being marginalized. However, I do not respect the aggression either–I feel that it reflects badly on women and turns us into the very thing we are fighting against. It makes men more prone to feel justified in their misogyny. And, it’s not sexy at all (which is what I think a lot of women are hoping for).

    Liked by 1 person

  31. Thank you for sharing. This verbalized much of what I thought/felt during the whole Women’s March on Washington. SO many of my friends went…and I just couldn’t get on board. That’s not who I am.
    Great blog. I look forward to reading more!

    Liked by 1 person

  32. Hey Caralyn. You keep getting more awesome all the time, speaking on topics that are important, but many don’t think of, or just let go.
    Besides the bottom line, I often wonder what the heads of these companies think that produce and sell these items. These shirts are so offensive even to see when walking down the street.
    Thank you Caralyn, for all the good you are doing, for sharing so much truth, morality, fairness with many on this might platform you have.
    I truly believe you have this large following because you speak truth, honesty, based on God’s Word, which you freely use without hiding it also. I believe God is inspiring you as you live and write, and guiding your mind and hand, because all you do draws people to Jesus Christ, and gives Glory to Jesus Christ, the Son of God. You don’t draw glory for yourself.
    Thank you Caralyn. God’s Abundant Blessings as you faithfully serve Him.
    Luv.
    George
    ❤❤⚘😀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh gosh George that’s so kind of you to say. Thank you. I know – what are they thinking producing them!? I did a little research and it’s actually a lot of etsy shops that sell them. Thanks for such generous words George. You’re the best. Hugs and love xox

      Liked by 1 person

  35. Good post! I could not agree more. There was a time in history, where women truly had no rights. They could not vote nor work outside the home other than in some sort of servitude in the houses of the rich. These women had every right to protest and make their sufferings known. They won many rights for us all, though they endured many sufferings to do so. But today’s woman:

    Puh-lease!!!!!!!!!! I hate it when they get up and say, “I speak for ALL women.” There is not a one of them who has ever spoken for me, as I am #1. from the south #2. I think for myself #3. I speak for myself and never in my life have I ever needed one dat-blasted person to “speak for me.” #4. Being from the south and being raised with cattle, horses, etc… I know everything in life is not handed to us on a silver platter. I mean I actually know where food and water come from and it is not on a grocery store shelf.

    I think some women are doing more to hurt this nation and family values, then I have ever seen in my whole life. The picture of the little girl shooting the finger proves it. What parent would teach a little one something like that and then take a picture of it??? Surely not one in their right mind!!!

    We are to be “help mates” to our husbands. My Mom was. She milked cattle, fed calves and hogs, so did us kids. We all helped Daddy. You know what, they raised good kids. Not perfect ones but good ones. We raised good kids, and our kids are raising good kids. It is not about anyone being superior to anyone else on earth, because of our gender. To me it is all just crazy. Good post and thanks for doing it. How is your Mom? Love you and God Bless, SR

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thanks so much for this thoughtful response SR. you’re so right – those voices do not represent all women – that’s for sure. Great food for thought here. Thank you. And thanks for asking about my mom – that’s so kind of you. She’s doing great 🙂 she’s my hero. Hugs and love xox

      Like

  37. I TOTALLY agree with you. “Do unto others”…if you want people to treat you with respect and bestow upon you the honor and diginity you deserve, TAKE THE HIGH ROAD! You start treating others that way FIRST! Yes, there was a time when women’s choices were limited, and men took advantage of our vulnerable position, but we have moved beyond that, and the pendulum has swung WAY too far. As a matter of fact, in this case, the pendulum has broken loose and is hurtling through space, destroying everything in its path. The angry behaviour and outbursts are making it so much worse for ALL OF US!! It’s time, ladies, to reel it back in, bring it back to the center, and start acting with class. Let’s show the self-righteously angry, loose-lipped, out-of-control folk how to behave!

    Liked by 1 person

  40. When I started reading this post, it made me think of the new Phil Defranco shirt that he’s selling….it just has the word pretentious on it. I think he feels similar to you.

    Liked by 1 person

  41. Here we go: THANK YOU!!! And “I am sorry” because now you got ME up on my soap box!

    Do you know that for the longest time (and sometimes still!) I introduce myself as an anti-feminist? WHY? Because I am sick and tired of a bunch of man-hating, hostile people (I refuse to call them “feminists” because they clearly do not know the meaning of the term!) have taken the feminist movement hostage and are abusing it and twisting it into something that at best, can be described as “a strive for gender neutrality”. But in many cases unfortunately turns into nothing else than “man hating” and actual persecution of all men as “monsters” or as in the case of a Swedish feminist extremist movement about a decade ago, coined the slogan “men are animals”.

    It appalls and disgust me. And quite frankly, it is those types of “feminists” that set the rest of us back decades, because your marching down the streets complaining that you are so mistreated, only makes the rest of us (I beg to argue we are the majority) who do not feel victimized and spend all our time complaining about how mistreated we are, look like victims too. We who instead assert ourselves as if we were the equals every sane man or woman know that we are, and just deal with it! And take our own responsibility to create our destiny and make our future.

    Ok, that’s it. I’ll better stop there before I get murdered by a bunch of hard-core man-hating people who are offended because some of us refuse to be the victim…..

    Liked by 4 people

      1. You are most welcome! Happy to see there’s another strong woman out there who dares speak up against this! Maybe we can “reclaim feminism” at some point…?!

        Like

      2. And it is always so great to “talk” to you! Thanks for reading my blog and for writing still! How’s the running going? 🙂
        xox

        Like

  44. From an article I posted on 7/23: “I was browsing around the bookstore this evening and saw some new titles. One title was “You are a Badass; How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life.”

    First, language people! This was on the New Arrivals shelf maybe 20 feet inside the door. Kids see this stuff! Is this how we want them…EVERYONE talking all of the time?

    The other book I saw was even worse: “The Subtle Art of not giving a F****.” Except it was spelled out with a dirty ink splotch instead of the vowel. Once more; language, people!

    If that’s the best this clown can do with a title, what would make me trust that there’s anything subtle anywhere in this book?”

    *sigh*

    Preach it, girl!

    Liked by 2 people

  45. As always, I so appreciate the way you address such big issues with boldness! I’ve preached on Colossians 3:18-19ff. I’d have to do some digging to remember what all I said I the sermon, but I recall focusing on the instruction given to the man – the Greek word is agapaho, which does mean to love someone dearly. It, of course, comes for the Greek word agape, which refers to a specific kind of love – the love God demonstrates for God’s beloved, Gods creation. I am in total agreement with you that Paul is urging husbands and wives to be mutually loving, supportive, and encouraging to their spouse. Wives have a great opportunity to believe in their husbands! But, I always like to stress to husbands (and wives) the great blessing they are given to reveal God’s love to their spouse.

    Liked by 2 people

  48. That was incredibly awesome. I tip my hat to you, if I’m ever in New York, I would love the opportunity to make your acquaintance versus reading some of your great stuff!

    Liked by 1 person

  50. If the only way you can think to build yourself up is by tearing someone else down you are not very big to begin with. That is what bullying is. Feminists have been at war not with men but with God. In the Garden after the fall God told the woman that part of her nature from then on would be a desire to dominate her husband, and all men. So your fight is not with me, not that it does any good. But feminest ladies your fight is with God and authority in general.

    Liked by 1 person

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