Gosnell and Facing the Difficult Truth

Posted on by beautybeyondbones

So, I went to the movies by myself yesterday. Which, believe me, is embarrassing to admit, and I had to put my pride aside for the evening. But there was a movie that I just had to see.

And you probably haven’t heard of it, even though it just recently broke the Top 10 at the box-office. Because it’s been pretty much blacklisted from any mainstream news outlet due to its topic matter.

The movie is called Gosnell: The Trial of America’s Biggest Serial Killer.

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And if the name Gosnell sorta-kinda rings a bell, it’s because back in the 2010s, he was one of – if not the first – abortion doctor to be found guilty of murdering babies.

Which, that statement is an oxymoron if you are in the pro-life camp. But it was a huge trial that actually garnered mainstream media attention.

And this film takes an in depth look at the trial, and how the political and media outlets tried to cover it up.

Now, I want to just pause here for a second: this article is not what you may think it’s going to be. I’m not going to push a pro-life agenda or shove facts and statistics down your throat. Nope. If you want to read how I feel about abortion — because I do hold very strong beliefs, especially given my history of anorexia, and as a result, my firm advocacy for the sanctity of human life — you can read about those here.

Tonight, I want to talk about something else, entirely.

And this is a warning that some of this material is graphic.

In the film, I don’t know if this is “spoiler-y,” because hello – it’s a real event. The information is already out there. But basically, Dr. Gosnell was on trial for, in addition to the horrific conditions of his hellish Philadelphia clinic, were the murder of children — born alive at 30, 31, 32 weeks – whom he then would snip the necks of, to “abort.”

Throughout the entire trial, Gosnell and his defense lawyer were winning by a landslide. No one wanted to get too close to an “abortion” case, (or cover it in the media for that matter) and it seemed that he was going to get off scott-free.

Until The Photo.

Until the prosecutor presented a piece of evidence that forced people to actually see the atrocities that we’ve sanitized and sugarcoated as “a woman’s right to choose” or even better: “reproductive rights.”

The photo was stealthily taken by a teenage technician at Gosnell’s clinic, who took a photo on her cell phone of the 32-week-old child who was born alive and then “snipped.”

And in the most powerful scene in the movie, the prosecutor went around to each member of the jury and held this photo 6 inches in front of them, and made them come face to face with what abortion actually is.

She made them come face to face with the truth.

We never saw the photo in the film. It is far too gruesome. But we saw the reactions of each member of the jury. And let me tell you friends, I was balling like a baby.

I was sitting by myself, in an empty movie theater in NYC, balling my eyes out.

But that is how the trial was won.

That photo won the case.

People had to come face to face and actually look at the truth of what we’ve hidden away and avoided talking about because of awkwardness, or political correctness, or fear of offending someone.

The truth was brought to the light. And Gosnell was locked up for life without parole.

(And if you want to see the actual photo, you can view it here, on the movie’s website. But I warn you, it changes you. I cried for 10 minutes straight after viewing it.)

But I was riding the subway home after the movie and that scene with the jurors, it stuck with me.

First of all, it was brilliant cinematography. Such a deliberately slow scene, with a pregnant pause in the action (pun intended) that made the viewer watch – for an uncomfortable amount of time – as each person faced the truth. In photographic evidence.

My mind wandered as the train made stop after stop. I had quite a long commute home, as there was only one movie theater in all of NYC that was playing, in their eyes, a “pro-life garbage film.” But needless to say, I had time to think.

And it made me wonder…what do I have in my own life that I need to come face to face with? 

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What areas of my life, or of my faith, or of my health, am I refusing to examine, because I know it will be uncomfortable?

Because the truth is a hard pill to swallow. The truth demands action. The truth demands change. And I think that sometimes, we don’t want to have to “deal with” the consequences of learning the truth. So we avoid it. And speaking from experience, I can be a master avoider when necessary.

You know, I think that abortion is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to what our culture refuses to confront.

I mean, why does culture have a steadfast rule to never talk about “religion or politics” at the dinner table? It’s because it is uncomfortable. The truth is messy. And hard to look at in the face.

Just like those jurors learned.

But it is only when we do, that justice can be brought about.

It brings me back to how I eventually ended up agreeing to go to inpatient treatment for my anorexia. I was resisting, and adamant about not going. I was legally an adult, so my parents couldn’t force me to go. So my family staged an intervention, and it wasn’t until a trusted family friend got literally 2 inches from my face and said, “Do you know what you’re doing to your father?” 

And it was in that moment that I finally was confronted with the truth. I was forced to see the truth of my actions, and manipulation and deception and destruction.

I had to look. He was exasperated, and tired, standing over the stove in the kitchen with his shoulders stooped and spirit broken. It was the first and only time I have ever seen my dad like that. And in that moment, I saw my hero – my dad, who I loved more than anything in the world – I saw what my eating disorder was doing to him. And how he was doing everything in his power – including flying in weight gaining drinks from Sweden – to help me get better. He believed in me, and was fighting for me, and I was absolutely destroying him and myself. I finally saw the toll it was taking on him.

And it was only then, in that moment, that I agreed to go to Inpatient.

The truth is hard to face. It is hard to stomach.

I am grateful that this movie brought us face to face with the reality of abortion.

Because you walk away from that movie with a choice: Now that I know the truth, what am I going to do about it? 

You come to a crossroads. Just like I was, sitting on the couch during the intervention.

Now what?

What are you going to do about it? 

Because the dangerous thing about the truth, is it requires you to take a position. With it comes responsibility. You cannot stay in a condition of apathy or indifference, once you’ve confronted it face to face. You can either remain silent, and thereby condone that which is going on. Or you can stand up and make your voice heard.

I am choosing the latter.

See the movie. And stand with the truth.

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247 thoughts on “Gosnell and Facing the Difficult Truth”

  4. I’ve known this movie was to come out. Thank you SO much for noting this movie is out. Let’s pray it opens up more eyes to people today. I am going to look it up right now and plan when I, too, will see it alone.

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  8. Very powerful writing, Pastor! I usually don’t cry reading blog posts but here I am. God gifted you with many talents and I know you give God the glory for being able to share in the way you do! I want you to know how very proud I am of you and for you to know you are touching many hearts, minds, and souls in a way no one else can or comes close to doing. You and your family remain in my prayers. Thank you.

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    1. Thank you so much Rick for your prayers and kind words 🙂 I’m so glad this resonated in your heart. I am so touched by your generous words and support. Big hugs xox

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  9. What a powerful post my friend! I’m so glad you dealt with anorexia otherwise it could have killed you… I’ve got the same issue with my husband now a days… he forgets to eat so he says; he is 6 feet tall and was weighing 134lbs recently. He is now weighing a bit more 140 ( baby steps I guess)… he doesn’t see himself underweight!

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    1. Thank you so much. Yeah i am so grateful for the healing god most graciously poured over me. I will definitely keep your husband in my prayers! Hugs and love xox

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  13. I have been a “Christian” for a long time, but in the last decade I’ve become a follower of Jesus. I am in a constant pursuit of Him who died for me. I have been politically, slightly left of center, but have been casually Pro-Life. The more I read my Bible, especially the Old Testament, I am convicted by God’s wrath against those; who kill the innocent. Like most centrists, I don’t like making waves and avoid controversial topics. I think this is one I need to put at the top, one I must face, and one that will determine my vote. Thank you for being controversial and correct.

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    1. Hey Stephan. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts on this. You’re right – it’s not an easy topic but a dang important one for sure. Hugs and love xox

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  14. Your post was powerful and moving, and I agree with almost all of it. You may already know my complicated stance on abortion from my book, but what this man did is clearly murder. It’s exactly the “blurry” lines of semantics like this that require exactly this conversation to be had. Thank you for having the courage to express your opinion. I respect it even though mine may differ, “for there must be factions among you in order that those who are genuine among you may be recognized.” – 1 Corinthians 11:19

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    1. Thank you so much Neal. I’m glad it resonated with you!! Yeah Gosnell was definitely in the wrong. Hugs and love xox

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  17. I saw the movie and, just like you, I saw it alone. Then again, the only way I see movies is alone since I cannot get anyone to go with me. Anyway, thank you for posting. It is another great post from a great lady.

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      3. ✨💛✨✨💛✨✨💛✨✨💛✨✨💛✨✨💛✨✨💛✨✨💛✨✨💛✨✨💛✨✨💛✨✨💛✨✨💛✨✨💛✨✨💛✨✨💛✨✨💛✨✨💛✨✨💛✨✨💛✨

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  20. Religion is easier to talk about when the Words come the wilderness for you to digest. Knowing that the Father sent me to bare witness of the light to you and others that hear his words. That is why I teach, I came from I believe to I know. You have beta males that are the children of the lies and the woman sacrifice their babies no different than they did 5th Century to the god, Chemosh in Babylon. This is what is called generational sin. Love you.

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  21. Caralyn, I really enjoyed your post and also had not heard about Gosnell and the trail until now (I admittedly do not stay up-to-date as maybe I should with hot topic important events). So thank you. Also, thank you for your perspective. I agree that we all have a choice and responsibility to act (or not act) when we learn the truth of something. So often we shy away and use excuses…”don’t talk politics or religion at the dinner table.” Like you said. We have to engage in these conversations because there is so much rooted in why we believe what we believe and why things offend us so much. I absolutely stand for justice – no matter what it is for or against (Lyric title from Lecrae’s song “Facts” on his album ATWT).

    However, there is one thing that I find important to make very clear. Not all abortion is the same. The extremity of the abortions portrayed in the movie are….well, I can’t even dare to look at the photo, but I can imagine. Now, it’s horrendous I’m sure, unethical, makes one sick and distrust all that is faintly good in human kind. At the other end, almost 92.5% of reported abortions are made in the first trimester (before 13 weeks) https://www.cdc.gov/reproductivehealth/data_stats/abortion.htm Again, like you delineated in your post, this is not an argument for or against abortion. This is rather to add to the bigger picture, statistics, and dialogue surrounding the topic. It’s one thing if the stats were reversed and what was portrayed in the movie (from real life circumstances) was 92%, rather than the 1.3% after 23 weeks gestation.

    It’s important, as a public figure, to be careful of singling out and isolating, yes a very horrific event, it’s atrocious that this even happens. But there is always more to the story. Our perspective may be skewed, it may be well intentioned, and it may miscommunicate and give people wrong information. Again, the movie portrays something outside the norm and seems to manipulate people with graphic images that communicate more than words could. I am glad the trial saw the photo, but look at the power of that photo….that isn’t what all abortions look like, and to not clarify that is to misrepresent and do an injustice to the topic you are talking about.

    Thank you for always bringing up hard topics. And I also appreciated the part in your post when you talked about self-examination and maybe looking at our blind spots that we too easily deny. Thank you for reading.

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    1. Thank you so much Nathalie for sharing your thoughts on this tough issue. Yes – the movie is incredibly gripping. Definitely try to see it in theaters if you can. You’re right – respectful conversation is powerful, and I welcome a dialogue about it. 🙂 This was definitely an extreme case. But I think it does challenge people to examine what they believe, which I think is a powerful thing. Thank you for such an eloquent, articulate and respectful response! Big hugs to you friend 🙂 xox

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  22. Omg, I wasn’t aware of this movie nor this horrific events ever happened. I feel sick to my stomach. Murder, absolutely. It’s abhorrent, unthinkable. I feel ill. How could someone be so dark they they would so cruelly murder something as innocent as a baby? Thank you for sharing this, watching it couldn’t have been easy.

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    1. Thank you so much, friend. Yes – I was sick to my stomach throughout much of the movie too. It was a tough movie to see but I had to support it, just so they keep making these important films! So glad you stopped by. Big hugs xox

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    1. Thank you Jennie. Yeah it is shocking and gut wrenching to say the least. So glad you stopped by. Hugs and love xox

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  24. I live in a Philly suburb so I was familiar with the case. I agree that sometimes the truth is a bit like swallowing fire and sometimes it changes you forever. For the record, I see nothing wrong or sad about seeing a movie alone – I have done it many times. Glad you got the treatment you needed, anorexia is very difficult to treat.

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    1. Hi Bryce, thank you for sharing your thoughts on this. Swallowing fire — that is such an accurate description! Thanks for your kind words. Hugs and love xox

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    1. I am unfamiliar with this term so I am unable to comment. But I believe that life begins at conception. Hugs and love xox

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  26. I’m sorry you felt awkward to watch a movie all by yourself. I wish we loved closer then we could go together :).
    This post shows me why you’re my favorite Catholic blogger. As a Catholic, it is so inspiring to see you blog and live out your faith in a relatable way that is evangelistic and… truthful. You are able to write with such passion, grit, honesty… and you have blessed me and many others in living out your vocation so authentically. So thank you for making Catholic blogging come alive for me, in a non-preachy yet very relatable manner :).

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    1. Aw thanks Teresa. Oh my gosh I am so touched by your generous words. You have blessed ME so much with your encouragement so thank you for that. And for the record, I think it would be a blast to see a movie together! 🤗 hehe Hugs and love xox

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  28. I am aware of this film but wasn’t going to see it. I will now, thanks to your post. Clearly what this Doctor did was wrong but that does not mean all pregnancy termination is wrong. Your writing was powerful and yes there is always a desire to find safety within comfort and not to push the boundaries. Kudos to you for asking the hard questions and taking action.

    While I am pro-choice I see women needlessly go to Doctors for abortions especially in the first trimester. I do firmly believe that women have a right to choice. In my work as a healer / shaman I have instructed many couples that have had difficult conceiving and carrying a child to term – how to release the spirits of aborted fetuses in order to clear the way for conception. Conversely a conscious miscarriage is a sacred ceremony of sending the spirit of the child back to the light, then a miscarriage of the physical occurs. The patriarch that remains since written history has grown increasingly corrupt and seeks to control and own women’s bodies including the process of pregnancy and birthing using genetically modified systems – with a French Genetic Medical Company for example and controlling women’s bodies by deciding for them what is life etc. I was raised in an abusive Catholic environment and see how doctrine can be perverted in many ways by powerful men.

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    1. Thank you Kai, it is definitely worth going to see. And thank you for sharing your perspective on this difficult issue. I’m sorry that you had to go through that during your upbringing. My heart definitely goes out to you. Hugs and love xox

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  30. Thank you for making this film public. If it opens even one person’s eyes, it was well worth it. Also thank you for tying the unveiling of the truth in the picture to your seeing the truth of your eating disorder. I can imagine how you felt seeing your father broken. I pray I have not done the same to my two sons who are 12 and 17. I am sure they have seen too much. I never meant to let it go on this long. Many blessings

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    1. Thank you so much Kelly. I think you’re right – even one person! And thank you for sharing your story. Definitely praying for you, my friend 🙂 sending big big hugs xox

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  32. Good for you for going by yourself! I haven’t done that yet but I did do a five day beach trip this summer by myself for the first time ever. It’s tough. We’re getting independent little by little haha

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  33. I can’t look at those type of movies, where someone is getting violently attack. Nor can I look at the photos, but you are right about bringing to light the uncomfortable topics and being able to listen to each opposing side. We might learn the root of some differences that is occurring in our world. And going to the movies alone is sad, it’s an amazing experience, because I’m not alone when Jesus is with me everywhere I go, plus I can sit and watch the movie without interruptions. Lol!

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    1. Thank you friend. Yeah it was definitely a difficult movie to see but so powerful. And I love that perspective! We’re never alone! Amen! Hugs and love xox

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  34. Did it go into detail of how Gosnell ran his legal/illegal clinic? How people came up from the South and neighboring states for his services? The states limit the when and how of the procedure through mandates. Meaning, limitations on the facility or no license. Gosnell is not how all clinics operate, just for clarity. It’s good to take a stand. It’s good to frame a story. Like, did you know before Roe v. Wade a million illegal abortions were being performed yearly? There was a spike in missing women as well. When there’s a divide, fear is the catalyst.

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    1. Yes – it went into all the gruesome and despicable detail. Makes me sick. Thanks for stopping by. I hope you see the movie! Hugs and love xox

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      1. People do ugly things. I was training near there. When I was really really poor. I went to the free hospital at the church there. Asked for a vasectomy. I felt, like I was good. Had two kids. Ha ha. The sister/doctor said, because of her duty to God she couldn’t assist me. They didn’t even have condoms. She still took my $50. Penance. I guess. There’s no scripture on abortion. Horatio Storer started the physician’s crusade against abortion because it was mostly married Protestant women who sought the procedure. He also blocked women from Harvard Medical who wanted to be OB/GYN. He said this, “Shall [these regions] be filled by our own children or by those of aliens? This is a question our women must answer; upon their loins depends the future destiny of the nation.” If I use a condom, it’s not because I don’t like God. He’s cool. I just don’t want another baby right now. Storer started the “abortion is murder” saying in the fifties, the 1850’s. Not meaning it was all murder just white Protestant babies.

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  36. Caralyn, you always impress me with your bravery to tackle hard topics. I’m not going to weigh in on the abortion debate because I feel there have been plenty of comments above to more than cover that ground. I really appreciate the accountability you confronted us with around avoidance of the hard truths and the sins and shame we all run from and deflect from – aka our own. Keep making us uncomfortable and doing it from a place of agape love.

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    1. Thank you John for sharing your thoughts on this difficult issue. And for your encouraging words! Hard truth for sure. Hugs and love xox

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  37. Excellent points. Though we may differ in particular ways (not regarding Gosnell, I can assure you), I thoroughly enjoyed the read and how you spoke truth in the face of difficult issues. Also, never be embarrassed to go to the movies alone. As an introvert, it’s a staple for my survival. 😉

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    1. Thank you so much friend. I’m so glad this resonated with you! Haha yeah it was actually quite enjoyable! I may have to make it a regular thing! Haha Hugs and love xox

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  43. I already know I can’t see the movie, because even that description was a lot for me to handle. But I support it and pray it gets seen! This was an excellent point to draw from it, Caralyn – thanks for sharing!

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    1. Thank you friend, yeah it definitely is a difficult film to watch. But I found it incredibly powerful and I hope a lot of people see it. It changes people! I’ll join you in that prayer!! Hugs and love xox

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  45. A movie along that’s okay hard-hitting subject movies I prefer to see along, that being said Gosnell would be one. It’s subject the little boy’s picture which I download from your link (thank you) screamed at me. A future poem staged a barricaded protest in my head for attention even as I attempt to write this response. Needless to say, if that picture does not rip your heart out you are empty build, a vacant soul hollow of spirit as the cold winds blow.

    Last but not lease we the people struggle with the truth it’s un-yielding un-bending a contradiction to our defending, wash over it if we must the truth! the fear in trust then manipulation has its plan when controlling other minds when we can. Now we have a new tagline out there “tell your truth” an alternative cue to a twisted view.

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    1. Hey friend! Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this. It really is such a gut wrenching photo. I’m sorry that you had to see it. You’re right – we’ve got to revere and respect the truth. Hugs and love xox

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  46. I love your honesty and defence of the unborn, but with such a loving stance. The part that also really hit me was when you looked at your dad and had that sudden realisation of what was happening. That was a amazing, God’s love truly working in one of his children.

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  47. Hello! I’m Joshua.
    I like your post very much! It’s very saddening that things like this happen. It’s a wicked world we live in.
    I like your blog! Have a blessed day!

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    1. Hi Joshua! Thank you so much for your thoughts on this difficult topic. You’re right – so saddening. Hugs and love xox

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  49. Society is desensitised to the value of life, the aborted child or the elderly person. We have been bombarded by the liberal view that it is my life, my body, my right and always for personal interest.
    People won’t face the difficult questions because it reminds them that we made the choice to ignore some basic principles and moral imperatives. We have become our own God. Deciding what is right and wrong because it suits us and let someone else pick up the peices.
    There does come a time when we are faced with the truth and how we respond says more about us than we realise. Every life is precious, at the points where we as the individual can’t protect our lives we rely – trust others to make the right decisions for us. Here society drops the ball. “My rights over your rights” always.
    What the trial shows clearly is that a moral line was crossed – however when? Should we be protecting that unborn feotus or should we wait for the heart to begin beating? Personally that moral stance was made long ago.
    Again you have provided us with a powerful piece of writing. Thank you

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    1. Desensitized indeed. We need to get back to the sanctity of life. So true. Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this difficult topic. Amen – life is precious! Giving your response a standing ovation! Hugs and love xox

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    1. Me too – so thankful indeed. It is a hard watch, but it really needs to be out there for the world to see. Thanks for stopping by. Hugs and love xox

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