The Divisive One

Posted on by beautybeyondbones

I came upon a post on Instagram the other day that exposed a concerning trend in the faith community. Among women. About women.

In the past month, there have been a number of Catholic women bloggers who have taken to their soap boxes to proclaim that the only holy or right place for a woman is in the home, rearing numerous children, homeschooling them, and only wearing dresses. Basically, shaming any woman working outside the home, or even being so “masculine” as to wear pants – literally.

And, if you’re shaking your head right now in disbelief, know I am right there with ya.

This was brought to my attention by one of my inspirations, Leah Darrow, who highlighted just how harmful and incorrect this way of thinking is, and how it is building walls between women and pitting them against each other.

After reading something this jarring and outrageous, it’s safe to say that it stuck with me for the next several days.

Because it has taken something good and beautiful — motherhood — and weaponized it.

Yes – is motherhood, and childrearing and creating a home a beautiful, noble profession that one day I pray God allows me to do? Absolutely.

But in no way does that equate to putting to shame women who work outside them home. God has equipped men and women with unique and valuable gifts and talents — necessary for the building of the Kingdom. Both sexes have important and vital roles both in the home and in the Kingdom, and how we respond to God’s call for our lives looks different for everyone!

That is the beauty of this life!

Yes, some are called to be wives and mothers. And I know beautiful, incredible women who have responded joyfully to that role God has called them to! But there are others called to be doctors. Teachers. Religious women. CEO’s. Missionaries. Nurses. Scientists.

God created each of us with a unique makeup with skills and talents and passions that are specific to oneself. And our beautifully feminine expression of those gifts and talents are what make us powerfully female.

Because yes, men and women have different attributes that reflect the masculine and feminine attributes of The Maker. That’s not a bad thing! That’s what makes us be complimentary to one another. It’s a symbiotic relationship. A partnership that pairs masterfully. Our feminine genius allows us to do things as only a woman can.

But you’ve heard this from me before.

What I want to focus on is another deeply concerning aspect of this trend of shame from woman to woman.

This chasm that is being created, dividing Christian against Christian, pitting peers against one another. Frankly it’s disgusting.

And sadly, it’s not just in the pants/dress – homemaker/working woman arena.

It’s in church leadership. It’s between Christian denominations. It’s in small groups and bible studies.

There is this trend of divide that somehow seeps into Christian fellowship — be it competitive holiness, shaming certain “others,” feelings of pride or superiority, or being the most “authentic” in worship styles.

It is so easy to fall into that trap of division.

And reading this exposé on Catholic mommy bloggers — it was just so evident to me where all this was coming from: Satan.

The evil one, seeking to divide and isolate, so as to create resentment, hostility, and feelings of shame and unworthiness.

There is nothing more negatively powerful than believing that you are unworthy or feeling overwhelmed by shame. Take it from someone who has been there. In fact, those feelings of shame and unworthiness are what led me down that dark path of anorexia, straight into Satan’s trap that he had waiting for me at that pit of despair.

It is no coincidence, that in this era where this world so desperately needs spiritual leaders that the division between the “Big C” Church family has never been more hostile than ever.

The Church doesn’t trust the Pope. Much of the Church — and the world at large — think the clergy are a bunch of sex offenders, closeted gay men, or pedophiles. Protestants and Catholics are still focused on our differences than similarities. And now, Catholic mommy bloggers are shaming women that wear pants!

This is the work of the evil one! He wants us to forget that we’re all on the same team!

We’re all on the journey towards Heaven, and we all should be doing everything we possibly can to build one another up, and encourage and support one another in our pursuit of holiness.

That is what we’re called to do. One of my favorite gospels is from Mark Chapter 2, where Jesus heals the paralytic man in Capernaum. Most people see this story as a reflection on healing and miracles, but I personally think it’s about the power of friendship.

You see, that paralytic man couldn’t get to Jesus. So four of his friends carried him on a mat to the house where Jesus was, and when they couldn’t get into the door, the friends lowered the man through the freakin’ roof.

Can you imagine!? I mean, talk about some dedicated friends!

That is the type of support we’re supposed to have for one another. We are to do whatever it takes to help get our loved ones close to Jesus.

That is what it means to be a Christian friend. Not creating division, and promoting a culture of shame and isolation.

No ma’am.

And that’s coming from a working woman in pants.

“This is what the Lord says to these bones: I will make breath enter you, and you will come to life.” Ez 37:5

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190 thoughts on “The Divisive One”

  1. This is upsetting. I think there are still many that want to control women’s bodies and minds because it’s a threat to the construct of masculinity. Tell me if I am not understanding, but God gives one free will and tells us not to cast judgment? Shame on those that shame and then proclaim they are righteous in the name of God.

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  2. Satan laughs when believers bicker with each other, no doubt. I hope I live long enough to see varied Christian factions actually LISTEN to each other– to our shock and amazement, we’d find out how similar we truly are. Most of our disagreements come from self-imposed shackles (walls) that just get in the way of true progress. Nicely done. Hugs and love– Mike

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  4. Legalism loves to rear it’s head in the family, especially when it come to parenting. I was in a group similar to this, not Catholic, but same ideas about motherhood. Thankfully God kept me from going too deep into it, but I was definitely influenced for a long time. God is not nearly as concerned about parenting choices as he is about your saving faith in Him and his son Jesus Christ. Follow Jesus with your whole heart and let him guide you, not some legalistic teachings.

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  6. Caralyn, well said! Our main focus, needs to be Jesus, Father God and the Holy Spirit. If we focused on dying to our flesh daily and humbling ourselves, we would love one another. Mercy triumphs over judgment. Too often we are filled with pride rather than love! hugs and love!

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    1. Thanks so much – you’re right about that – we need to focus on Jesus and the rest falls into place! Hugs and love xox

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  7. It’s so crazy this weird doctrine still endures, but it’s in some sects of Christianity blatantly, but in other sects are a bit more subtle. Where do you suppose they get this justification from in the bible? It never sat well with me when I was in leadership and there were discussions revolving around the role of a woman. Even the phrase, “Role of a woman”, bothers me, but I digress. There was this push for men to be a domineering force and I have never liked that. I’ve always thought relationships should be give and take and equal. The best leaders make decisions with everyone’s sign on or input, the worst make the decisions regardless of what others think. That’s how I’ve always seen it play out well in the natural world so I’ve always believed that.

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    1. Thanks Peter for sharing your heart. I definitely can understand where it’s coming from. Motherhood is absolutely beautiful and noble. I just don’t like the bloggers who shame women who work! Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox

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      1. For sure! How do they justify said shaming though? Is there a particular passage that’s interpreted fundamentally or is it more of a traditional thing? I don’t know much about catholicism. When I was growing up in Christianity, it was more of a woman should remain silent, not in leadership yada yada yada. It wasn’t taught from the pulpit, per se, but it was modeled in one church in particular that I attended.

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  8. You are SO right, Caralyn, that Satan is at the bottom of such controversies as you highlight here. Julius Caesar, who said “Divide and conquer,” described perfectly the devil’s strategy. We must not allow him to have the victory! But how do we reach consensus when both sides feel they’re right and offer proof-texts for their positions? The apostle Peter gave us at least one possible response: seek peace and pursue it (1 Peter 3:11). And Paul gave us another when he told two women in disagreement, “Be of the same mind in the Lord” (Philippians 4:2). Perhaps some responders to those blogs will be able to calmly and lovingly draw attention to the importance of unity in the body of Christ. That can be accomplished when we focus on our commonalities, and leave the lesser matters between the individual and God. Meanwhile, we can pray for one another.

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    1. Thanks Nancy – amen – be of the same mind in the Lord!! I love that so much. Yes! Unity!! Joining you in prayer! Hugs and love xox

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  9. Excellent post. This may be new to Catholic circles but it’s been around for a long time. It’s an attempt to redefine what being a Christian means, and to create an alternative culture to “the world”. At least that’s what they say. The Amish are an example of this.

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    1. Thank you so much for your thoughts on this. Yeah – I think there is a healthy balance and supportive community to be found 🙂 Hugs and love xox

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  10. In my journey of spirituality I have come across many Christians who were uneducated about how important a role women played in the very early years of christ’s ministry. I mean the first person to see Christ after his resurrection was Mary Magdalene. Sometimes in organized religion, the source material is watered down via interpretation. I would encourage all christians to revisit the earliest writings on christ, he is surrounded by strong independent women.

    Your pagan friend, Karac

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    1. Thanks Karac for sharing your thoughts. Yes – Mary was the first evangelist! And the Bible is full of strong women! Hugs and love xox

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  11. It is surprisingly because I personally know certain Catholic mothers who wear pants and see nothing bad about it.
    I believe those women are only using it to give something bigger, a deeper pain which makes them shame their fellow women.
    Thank God for the game of hell will never prevail over the church.
    Thank you for this!

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    1. Amen – God is victorious over the evil one. And I think you’re really into something there. Thanks for stopping by. Hugs and love xox

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  13. Thank you for this post, Caralyn. Division and extremes are everywhere these days. We forget that truth nearly always resides in the middle.

    As a practicing Catholic and someone who has struggled with body image, I’d be really interested to hear your thoughts on the modesty/clothing debate. There’s such a spectrum in the Catholic and Christian communities on this topic and I’ve often wondered what you thought. I think your experience would be really valuable to the conversation.

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    1. Thank you friend for sharing your heart. Yeah division is the biggest tool of the evil one. That’s a great question. I’m sorry to hear that you’ve struggling with that – I definitely feel you. I’ll work on a post about it! I def have some thoughts! Hugs and love xox

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      1. Thanks, Caralyn. I realize I worded that poorly- I meant to say that your experience as a practicing Catholic and someone who has struggled with body image would be a valuable perspective when it comes to the modesty debate.

        God bless and I look forward reading your post!

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    1. Hi Laura! Yeah this was something going around some catholic women’s blogging circles. I haven’t been exposed to it either. But it just gave me pause. Thanks for stopping by! Big hugs to you xox

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  15. Great post Caralyn. Though I can’t endorse many teachings of Catholicism, I believe we have an obligation to dialogue with all parts of the Body. We are to move toward others in love, not build walls to separate us.

    I’ll refrain from comment on the ‘role of women’ debate except to say I tend to be in the more traditional camp. However, I recognize that the role of women is as much a cultural born as anything else. And contrary to some views, there is no “Christian culture.”

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  16. Well put Catalan, Satan loves it when we focus on some ridiculous differences and make it a thing which becomes a so called definitive of walking the righteous path.
    Jesus is the only one who makes us worthy, let us build each other up and focus on being more Christ-like.

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  18. No doubt! You always post some insightful material. I know you were cover this issue about division and it extends so far beyond this specific example. People get so caught up in our differences instead of what I would call our “sameness”. Hopefully people take pause and apply this to all areas of our modern life. Cheers good work!

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  19. Been looking forward to your passionate heart bursting forth in wise poetic beauty. And this is another worthy cause you captured beautifully with power. The enemy loves it when we divide ourselves and he can conquer. I am a doctor and a homeschooling mom who wears dressed maybe weekly. The truth is always somewhere in the middle of the two extreme sides of an argument. God always looks at our hearts and measures us by how passionate our love is for Him, and an afterthought is what we did with the gifts He gave us to use for Him. We must love Him passionately and then do what He has designed us to do. The rest of life happens in their natural course. The rest is quite frankly BS and only serves pride and division, neither of which are from God. Great post, beautiful friend! As always, love you. Hugs! XO😄❤

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    1. Thank you so much Tonya 🙂 you’re absolutely right – division is the evil one’s biggest tool. And amen – there is a middle ground full of mystical understanding, respect and unity and I pray that we can get there!! I love this perspective so much. Thanks for sharing! Love you dear friend!!!! 🥰

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  21. Welcome to the TURF’s Caralyn their a right wing religious group running a muk all over the place with their own idealogy of the Bible and how people should live there lives according to them, there nothing more than another hat group hiding behind the Bible. 😞

    ❤️✌️
    BY FOR NOW

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  22. “We’re all on the journey towards Heaven, and we all should be doing everything we possibly can to build one another up, and encourage and support one another in our pursuit of holiness.”

    Well said!

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  23. There is a tendency around the world these days to redefine the role of women in society and take us back to the dark ages where women are owned chattels in this so called enlightened age. The real danger is when this conservative element unites with government to legislate their agendas. Yes women are entitled to express their God given talents in a way that brings them fulfillment and God rejoices at healthy ambition. The conservatives need to remember when Eve was taken from Adam’s side it was symbolic of an equal relationship not a subservient one. I cannot understand women actually wanting to place their peers as subservient under a religious cloak. It’s unhealthy to abdicate women’s own equal status and forcing it on others is unforgivable. There are millions of families around the world where both have to work just to eat and survive. Picking on the women in that partnership who have no choice but to work on religious grounds is unacceptable.

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    1. Thanks Ian for sharing your thoughts on this. You’re right – from the side, as an equal. Not from the foot or from the head. But the side. Hugs and love xox

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  24. Well said Caralyn. It is not bad enough that “Catholic believers and Protestant believers” in Christ put each other down. Then, different denominations put each other down. (In typing the previous sentence, rather than denomination, my fingers “demonination”):which seems very appropriate. 😞

    Now it appears to be a battle of women against women. And all claim to love, follow, and serve Jesus Christ.

    We certainly know the end times, and the return of Christ is getting close. Scripture informs us.

    Matthew 10:21-22
    21 “Now brother will deliver up brother to death, and a father his child; and children will rise up against parents and cause them to be put to death. 22 And you will be hated by all for My name’s sake. But he who endures to the end will be saved.

    That is our warning that the enemy of our souls is going to do everything in his power to disrupt, disturb, and fragment the Body of Christ any way he can.
    We need to learn to look TO Christ alone, and not AT each other.

    It needs to be realized that satan knows the Bible well. He will take portions out of context, twist the words and cause confusion, all with the purpose of breaking the Body of Christ.
    It is to be remembered that each part of the body is necessary for the entire body to be healthy. If a toe is broken, one cannot walk properly. (That could be a small criticism made). Or it could be slamming an entire group of people who dress differently. (That could be possibly compared to loss of vision).
    Any way which hurts other parts of the Body of Christ, hurts, and breaks the unity we are to have. That kills our Joy as Christ followers, and increases happiness in the demonic world.

    Please, we need to show “not yet” Christ followers we do get along as a family should, and as Christ planned.

    Thanks.

    God’s Blessings Caralyn,
    Keep on, Keepin’ on for Jesus.

    Luv, 😀🌹❤️😘

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    1. Thank you so much George for sharing your heart. Oh yes – an unfortunately appropriate slip. We need to focus in what unites us and be a family like Christ planned!!! Love these verses so much. How incredibly powerful and telling. So glad you stopped by. Hugs and love xox

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  25. I read and follow Cynthia Bourgeault. She asks us to take a look at an idea from traditional Christianity—the formula of Father, Son, and Holy Spirit—as though we’re looking at it for the first time. She reveals it to be something we hadn’t expected at all. Cynthia finds in the idea of the Holy Trinity a striking vision of the nature of reality. Embedded within this doctrine that Christians recite mostly on autopilot lies a powerful metaphysical principle that could change our understanding of Christianity and give us the tools so long and so sorely needed to reunite our shattered cosmology, rekindle our visionary imagination, and cooperate consciously with the manifestation of Jesus’ “Kingdom of Heaven” here on earth. She looks to the history of Christian theology, to her own years of contemplative practice, and to the ideas of G. I. Gurdjieff. Her tone is as accessible as it is compelling, and it’s a wild ride.

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    1. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I do not follow her. But I will look her up. The Trinity is a beautiful example for us. I appreciate you stopping by!! Hugs and love xox

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  28. Good morning, Just read your very powerful post. I’m a woman who’s raised two wonderful sons and now is blessed with four fantastic grandchildren, who embraced wholeheartedly my role as wife, mother, homemaker, BUT who also has a few degrees, was a Primary teacher, worked in admin, was part of a group that trained professionals and students on aspects of mental health, and a few things besides. We are all the sum of our parts. If we don’t have the freedom (of our own making or others) to explore and expand on our gifts then we will struggle to be ‘the whole’ that could be our destiny.
    I would define myself as spiritual rather than religious. I have read the Bible twice and cannot recall reading that women were to be home-bound. Some of the most powerful people are women, and they did not eschew ‘working’ rather than being totally bound up with motherhood. On the other hand, in the centuries covered in the Bible there was very little that a woman was called to do outside the home; that does not mean that view should still be relevant. As for trousers, in Biblical times men did not wear trousers, unless they were workmen. That’s evolved, so why not for women?
    Have a beautiful day. The sun is just rising here in North Wales and it promises to be a glorious day.

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    1. Hi Marilyn, thank you so much for sharing your story. I love that so much – we are a sum of our parts! amen amen amen!!!! Thanks for stopping by, hope oyu have a beautiful day! big hugs xo

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  29. There will always be those who want to argue that the Bible says that women are not to work outside the home. In fact, I even found a website that ranted on and on citing chapter and verse, (out of context I might add), to support its claim.
    Let me, however, point out what we find in the Bible itself when we look at the godly women who worked:
    Acts 18-Priscilla, wife of Aquila, worked with him as a tentmaker along with Paul;
    Acts 16-Lydia-merchant who sold purple
    Romans 16-Phoebe, the “patron”

    Keep in mind that these are just example that are cited in the New Testament alone and also include just a few women with whom the writers of the books of the BIble and therefore members of the first century church would have had direct contact with. It says nothing about women not known to these men, those of the Old Testament, or any since. Furthermore, these women were all instrumental in the growth of God’s Kingdom and certainly did not do it as a result of being housewives and mothers exclusively.
    May God continue to richly bless you in your service to Him.

    Rev. James M. Dakis, D.Min.

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    1. Thank you James for sharing this insight! so true – and i love that Mary Magdaline was the first evangelist too! hugs xo

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  30. Hello Caralyn,
    I grew up Catholic but I am a born-again Christian. I chose to stay at home like my husband wanted. I see nothing wrong with a woman working. There are many examples in the Bible of women working. Honorable women.
    My mother-in-law told me many times I should work and help my husband earn money. Money is her and my father-in-law’s focus. Anyhow… I felt so bad for years that I was not working though it was a decision my husband and I made. At some point, I stopped caring about what she thought.
    I am not crazy about pants, but it is not for me to judge.
    Not only am I not to judge, but I also don’t allow myself to put down others and I try very hard to never gossip. It is a struggle at times.
    It is my place, according to God Himself to LOVE others. THAT is my job. He takes care of the judging and the correcting.
    No one should be putting another down. Life is hard enough. Women should be lifting each other up. It is unfortunate that many women, no matter their faith, are destructive to each other. Well, they are not so nice to each other and don’t lift each other up.
    I always love reading your posts and pray you will continue to be inspired to write.
    Take care of yourself and may God bless you ❤

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    1. Thank you so much Jackie for sharing your heart and your story. You’re so right – we are called to love. Period. I love that you were able to do that. One day, if God blesses me with a husband and children, I hope to be able to stay home to raise them as well. 🙂 yes! lets life one another up! big hugs xo

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      5. I’m not sure how you ever find the time to reply at all. You seem so busy, thank you for finding the time.

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      6. haha absolutely!! I’ve been lagging a bit lately — big things coming up which I will be sharing about on Monday!!! but yeah, i love responding!! 🙂 have a great night! xox

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  32. Thanks for your post. I am a Catholic and I agree that we all have a different calling. I believe that I’m called to be a mom, because I am blessed with 4 kids. But at the same time, I’m also called to be a nurse, a Preacher, an adviser, a teacher, a friend etc. And yes I also agree that we are supposed to be helping each other in our journey towards heaven….that is our main calling…I believe😊

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    1. Thank you so much for sharing your heart and your story! four blessings! that is so awesome! amen to that! we all have different callings, equally important, and equally beautiful!!! hope you have a wonderful weekend! big hugs xo

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  34. Your posts continue to blow me away! Our world, sadly, is so divided in many years. Christians are “tasked” to love one another and not be divided. In terms of “a woman’s place,” I believe it’s not practical in 2019 for a woman to stay home with their child or children, as the costs of living continue to (unfortunately) increase. If given the chance, I would love to be able to stay home when Al and I have kids. However, we had that exact conversation years ago, and I’ve accepted the fact that I will likely have to keep working. But, I’m grateful my new job has generous benefits, including a day care savings account. It’s one of many reasons I accepted the job.

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    1. Oh gosh thank you so much Laura Beth 🙂 You’re so kind to say that. Amen – loving one another is what we’re called to do. Period. Oh wow, that’s awesome that your company is so proactive and supportive! sounds like you’ve found a winner 🙂 Sending you so much love and hugs xox

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      1. I feel really good about this change. It was so stressful – Resigning from a company that I originally didn’t think I would leave, ever. I worked for them for almost seven years. But, just in this first week, there’s already such a radical difference and so many good things. God put this in my life at the right time! Hugs!!

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      2. I’m so glad you’re feeling good about it!! God is good and is always working behind the scenes for us! 🙂 hugs xo

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  36. When we were expecting our first child, my wife and I had an agreement; whoever was making the most money would stay working and the other would stay at home with the baby. In2019 it’s a much tougher decision. Many families need two incomes. But the financial cost of day care and – I think – the emotional cost outweigh paying someone else to raise your child for you and instill them with values and attitudes you might not agree with.

    Does squeaking by on one paycheck present challenges? Yes! But my wife has always said that a parent’s job is to give their children good memories. Parents can do that better than strangers.

    Hopefully, everyone sees here that the important thing is what you’ve stated – moms and dads need to work together to make that happen! We sacrificed together; I can’t remember how many potato and Velveeta dinners we had, but we made that and other decisions together.

    Condemning how others choose to deploy their marriage for family doesn’t start such discussions. It kills them. Thank you for bringing this up, Caralyn!

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    1. Hi Jeff! Thank you so much for sharing your heart – you’re right – working together is what matters – as does supporting others as we journey towards Heaven. it’s hard enough to be “in the world” as a Christ follower – it’s insult to injury to have other Christ followers condemning or passing judgement. We should be lifting up our brothers and sisters! hope you have a great weekend! hugs to you and your girls! x

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  38. This is a difficult topic to navigate. The emphasis should be on building each other up and not tearing one another down. Having been a stay-at-home mom, I often found myself having to justify that. It was my husband’s and my decision and I have never regretted it. God brought along several ways to augment our income and challenge that brain of mine along the way. I was constantly amazed at his provision. That said, it makes me sad to think of this trend and how divisive it is. God did not make a one-size-fits all description of being a woman. I know lots of women who have a great career and a family. The challenge is to keep the family first, and that challenge is for men and women. That looks different for everyone. I hope that women who have a calling to be home with their children instead of in the work force will embrace that and not give up because of the financial part. I also hope they will be comfortable wearing pants. Shoot, I’m wearing shorts right now. Shocking! Truthfully, it is expensive to pay for childcare. Yes, we did give up some financial gain for me to stay home, but that’s where you have to look at what is important to you and how you want to live. For me, I’d have been a wreck keeping up with work schedules and children’s schedules. I don’t think it would have been a peaceful house. That’s me. I encourage my grand daughters to go to college, to look for a career, and more importantly to set their eyes on Jesus. If God gives them husbands and children, then I will continue to encourage them to be workers at home. This does not exclude working out of the home, but I believe Titus 2 gives us a good idea of what God is looking for. And if you’d like me to elaborate on what true submission as a wife looks like, I’d be happy to in a different conversation. It’s tricky! God bless you, Caralyn.

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    1. Hi Bonnie, thank you so much for sharing your story. I think building a home is so beautiful and a noble profession – one i hope to do one day! You’re so right – we need to focus on building one another up!!! we’re all brothers and sisters in Christ and on the same team! so glad you stopped by and joined the conversation! hugs xo

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  39. Yes men and women have their roles but this type of confusion or misinterpretation of the scripture, comes when one uses their own human intelligence to understand God’s word. God’s thoughts are not the same as ours (Isiah 55: 8-9). The only way to know his ways is to be in the spirit (John 15:4). It is the holy spirit that will give you the true meaning of a scripture (John16:13). The flesh cannot connect with God nor can it please God (Romans 8:8) That is why true worship is to be done in spirit and truth (john 4:24). But this was a lovely post, keep it up!

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    1. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts on this. I agree – scripture is God Breathed and the HS will help us see. Thanks for stopping by! hugs xo

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  40. Hopefully the dear old Pope will declare 2019 legit. As this is where most of us exist. I feel so sorry for the relidgizly oppressed.

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    1. Thank you so much! Oh wow — that is a startling — and very telling — statistic. wow. thanks for stoppping by! hugs xo

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  43. Well done. Very thoughtful piece. Yes, Satan is at work dividing us and his traps are all too easy to fall into. I see this time as one where reason has been overtaken by emotion. Reason takes thought, emotion is just a reaction. I haven’t read the blog to which you refer, but whatever happened to a person saying “This is what I believe and although you may have chosen a different route, hear me out.” It’s hard to win converts to one’s opinion when one is shaming.

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    1. Thank you so much Sandman for sharing your thoughts. You’re right – dividing is what he tries to do. We must build one another up! There’s no place for shaming in the Body of Christ! hugs xx

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  44. Shoot, I’ve been railing against the mommy wars for years. Breastfeeding moms are good, formula feeding moms are heinous; cloth diapering moms are good, Pampers are evil… Big picture: God has put moms (and all people) into circumstances that can (and should) lead them to become more Christlike. This comparison trap is nothing but self-righteous Pharisee-ism. And it’s gross. Christians (especially women) have GOT to stop biting and devouring one another. Another great post, you nailed it, lady.

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    1. You’re so right, Eden – there can be so much judgement out there, it makes me so sad, becuase we’re all on the same team and should be cheering one another on!!!! Amen! Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your heart! big hugs xo

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  45. A good Instagram post by Leah Darrow –

    I want to love (my future partner) such that she feels confident and safe for her own creative path forward with Holy Spirit

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  47. It’s. Actually a large part of cultural tradition of Mennonite and Amish to keep traditional hetero roles. I don’t think they believe they’re worshipping the devil. Although, you might refer to a separate macro culture, with a shared religion but different belief system that wants to be Amish. In short, it works for Amish but they are even feeling pressured because their belief system is an extension of their Anabaptist roots from Germany. In the 1100’s or, so.

    I don’t think, you’re wrong for believing division is the devil’s work. There’s just, very few Christian macro cultures that live truly what they preach. Amish being one of them and Mennonites, being Amish “Light.” See. Culture starts with religion and from religion we get a set of life rules and these rules balance and sustain a community. The issue, and I’ve read your article a few times is, females roles throughout the Church. Big C. Although, the big C creates a single identity of Christian belief. The macro cultures of different beliefs are decided by separate communities with separate belief systems like, Amish. Do, Amish have a soapbox? No. They don’t buy soap they make it. 🎤😁

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    1. Hi Kenzie! Great to hear from you! Thanks for sharing your heart and insight on this. Yeah, division is one of the evil one’s tools for sure. hahah they make it – that makes me smile. You bring up a lot of great points here – Big C, Big Umbrella Christianity definitely has a lot of smaller offshoots for sure. Lots to chew over – hugs xo

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      1. Division. Tribalism. Is very human. Not to say there is no Devil. Like, your area Chelsea is the most expensive place and in mine is Paradise Valley. Bunches of rich people priced out the nearby inhabitants creating a division to create a community. They didn’t actually advertise they did this but Ben & Jerry’s costs twice as much. 😂 Paradise Valley became rich just after the baby boom and Chelsea about a century before that.

        Evil. I’m just, not sure if we agree on the same definition of it. Every addict I’ve met called their actions a possession without ownership of those actions or of their consequences. We have more forethought of the grandeur of the supernatural than the divisions we live within like Paradise Valley and Chelsea. Simply, to condemn a group inside a community for it’s exclusion and to exclude actual communities built on exclusion seems unequal in your condemnation.

        I feel like you, could have stretched this out into a few posts. It feels, claustrophobic. 😂 I still like, you though. You’re alright.

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  48. Here’s a thought.
    St.Joan of Arc wore a man’s tunic, hose and armor. When she was captured and asked why she dressed like a man, she replied,”Dress is but a small matter.” When she was told that she could not attend Mass unless she wore a dress she said, “the dress of those who receive the Sacrament can have no importance.”
    It is believed that she dressed like a man because it was more modest to do so given the mission God had entrusted to her as the General of an army of men.
    Purity of intention seems to be what really matters.

    Source: How Cross-Dressing Helped Send Joan of Arc to the Stake by Joan Vos MacDonald

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    1. Thank you so much Elf for sharing this insight! Wow, what a powerful testimony with her life. Definitely a lot to think about! Big hugs to you xox

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  49. Reading this chilled me to the bone. Women weren’t born wearing different clothes on they’re lower halfs. Impractical clothing was the invention of men not God, in fact, if you go back to Genesis, all clothes are just a sign of man’s sin, thus it could be argued that being clothed is the work of the devil. By the same measure women wearing trousers is no more evil than men wearing trousers both are a mark of man’s fall from Gods Grace.

    However the point of this comment is to say how similar this narrative is to the Islamic attitude of separating women and men to the point where neither are allowed to speak. This is not done to oppress women but in an attempt to raise them onto a pedestal untouchable by any man.

    Quite frankly as a hard working woman, who can never physically bear children and is scared of heights these pedestals which male leaders want to place me on scare the pants off me. Everyone knows if you put something on a pedestal it’s only a matter if time till it falls off!!!

    Let’s go back to what Jesus would of done. He stopped the death by stoning of a woman who fell off her pedestal I’m pretty sure that if he was
    walking around today He would be handing out a pair of jeans to everyone He met wearing a skirt.

    Devisions are the work of the Devil walling us off into our own separate hells. Heaven is harmonious meaning we are all one, together, not separated. Jesus taught inclusion. Women must wear skirts and stay at home smacks of exclusion. Jesus didn’t teach exclusion I mean look what He did when He found exclusion in the temple.

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    1. Thank you so much Billie for sharing your thoughts on this and joining the conversation. I agree – division is the evil one’s tool, because once a person believes they are alone, or should feel shame, then they are vulnerable to his attacks. We need to build one another up. hugs xox

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