Ugh. I swear, all I have done today is “stress eat” and I’m not even kidding.
OK – well maybe that’s an exaggeration. I worked, I showered. But at least it feels like it.
I’ll take an inventory of my fridge later on and let you know the real damage. But I can say this…there is no more almond butter in this house, I’m telling ya that, right now!
I, friends, am in the midst of a classic case of “needing-to-take-my-own-advice.”
Anyone else ever experience this humbling phenomenon?
Long story short:
Last week, I was FaceTiming with my sweet niece. She’s seven, and as cute as can be. And she was asking why I was not up at our family reunion with everyone. And the answer…is that I am still afraid to fly, and potentially pick up Covid and then pass it on to my parents. Not to mention, me, myself — with an autoimmune disease — contracting it.
But anyways, I found myself having to explain to a sweet, impressionable child, why I was afraid. And the last thing I wanted to do was to instill an unhealthy sense of fear in this spunky, vivacious young girl.
So I replied that I was being cautious so as not to pass along any Covid germs to anyone. But then, I heard come out of my mouth: that it’s important to be cautious, but to not let fear control you. I said, we need to practice healthy habits: — wash our hands, wear a mask, don’t touch our face — but that we cannot live in fear, and stop living.
To which, this sweetie pie nodded along and whole heartedly agreed.
But I hung up the call, and I asked myself…am I doing that? Am I living in fear? Am I forgetting to live?
I mean, what is the one thing I want to do more than anything else? Visit my family.
And what has been holding me back? Fear of getting Covid on the plane and giving it to my parents.
And, yes, that is a legitimate concern.
But am I going to let the months continue to go by without seeing them? Caralyn…God is ultimately in control, anyways!
But back to my current insatiable nervous nibbling.
Why, the stress eating?
Well – I’m leaving next week on a road trip with a couple girlfriends. We’re driving to Maine. This is my small travel group of besties — we go somewhere every August, it’s an annual tradition.
And well, this year — instead of planning outfits and getting pumped for some high adventure excursions — this year, I am admittedly…nervous.
I mean – in the 15 minutes I’ve been sitting here writing this post, I’ve chipped off all of my nail polish. Soo…I figured I needed to air out my anxieties and not bottle up the emotions, but rather: speak them out, and let them go.
Here’s the deal. Everyone is getting Covid tested prior to leaving. Good. I can control what I can control: ie: masks, hand washing, not touching my face, social distancing as much as possible. But then the rest, I have to just give over to God. Release to Him, and trust that everything is going to be okay.
Because at the end of the day, what a blessing to be able to spend a long weekend with three of my favorite people in the whole wide word, in God’s beautiful creation? That is such a gift, and I’m going to miss out on making memories and having fun and being goofy if I’m in my head the entire time, worried about germs and personal space, and symptoms.
I need to follow the advice I gave my niece: be appropriately cautious, but don’t be controlled by fear.
John 14:27 – “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. … Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.”
And isn’t it something, that some form of “be not afraid” is spoken 365 times in the Bible. So how’s that for reassurance.
And in case you were curious about the Covid test…I actually did a mail in test, and it was honestly the best situation ever.
Completely free and covered by insurance. They overnight mailed me a test. I took it — it was PAINLESS, a swab in the lower nostrils. (NOT all the way into your brain like people say). I overnight mailed it back this morning (with prepaid postage, I might add.) And I’m now awaiting my results, which should arrive in my inbox in 3 days! This is not sponsored…but the test is by Pixel by LabCorp. HIGHLY RECOMMEND.
And as for visiting my family? I’m planning a trip for September! Hooray!
Anywho – if you have any recommendations for Maine, I would love to hear them! We’re going to be spending time with Mother Nature, and hopefully eating some exquisite seafood! Be sure to follow me on Instagram (@beauty.beyond.bones) where I’ll be posting about the trip! (And also creating a vlog!) Hopefully a perfectly cooked lobster will be gracing my IG stories! (Fingers crossed!)
“This is what the Lord says to these bones: I will make breath enter you, and you will come to life.” Ez 37:5
A huge shoutout to Reason Nutrition Beverage! Their all-natural, high calorie drink is not only delicious, but it has no “garbage” in it! Utilizing the wholesome goodness of coconut oil, it’s a phenomenal option for those needing to gain weight in recovery, or for those simply looking to supplement their diet with convenient and fast nutrition. Check them out!
A big thank you to my foundational sponsor, BetterHelp Online Therapy. I cannot begin to express how beneficial therapy was for my recovery from anorexia. Speak with an online therapist. Or check out content about eating disorders from BetterHelp.
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