Plans

I’m going to be really honest with y’all.

Growing up, I thought my life was going to have played out a lot differently by now.

I thought I was going to be married at 22, first kid at 23, and…I wanted ten…so…you do the math.

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I know. I know. I had high ambitions for my womb at a tender young age.

But it’s true.

Sitting here as a twenty-something, single, watching The Bachelorette while drinking in my sweatpants and catching myself literally smiling to myself and touching my cheek when my boy Jordan Rodgers comes on the screen…

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…I have to step back and simply shake my head.

My life thus far, has taken some pretty major detours, to put it mildly.

Battling anorexia through high school. And then having an Ulcerative Colitis flare for an entire year, resulting in having to move home and be on bed rest for 11 months…let’s just say my adulthood thus far hasn’t been the walk in the park I had envisioned.

And I promise, this is no “Woah is me” post…But the fact is, my life has had a couple of false starts. Hiccups if you will.


But I had a night this week where I just got really down, thinking about the “could have beens” and the “would have/should have beens.” 

Which, let me just say, is a very dangerous game to play.

Don’t go there, guuurlfriend!

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But seriously. My chest tightened, and I got almost short of breath, thinking about those things. I was getting panicky. And frankly, angry.

Why hasn’t this happened yet? When am I going to meet someone? What if I never meet someone? Will my life be a failure? Am I a failure?

Like I said….it is a dangerous game. Gets dark real quick.

So what did I do to get out of this funk?

Well, naturally……………….I turned to Twitter.

I was scrolling through tweets about Donald Trump, Donald Trump, Donald Trump, Gorilla Kid, Donald Trump, Beyonce, Donald Trump, Kim Kardashian

…and then –BAM — I came across this retweeted gem:

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Y’all. The Pope has a freaking Twitter.

I know.

I don’t care how you feel about the Pope. That is baller.

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But seriously, how is it that God always finds a way to encourage His children?

There is no technological interface that He can’t infiltrate. 🙂

But all kidding aside, this was exactly what I needed to hear:

Jesus, I trust in You.

Everything I’ve gone through, all the detours and restarts and … periods of stupidity growth opportunities – God is using all of that for good.

He has a plan. A good plan. A plan that most likely looks nothing like my plan.

Clearly not the plan my fourth grade self had for twenty-something me.

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Yikes.

But that is what I need to cling to. To keep my hope in. To focus my eyes on.

So, maybe I won’t be gettin’ hitched and poppin’ out kids just yet.

That’s okay.

I need to be patient and trust in His divine timing. His will for my life. His plan.

Now is the time for me to take a deep breath and say, “Jesus, I trust in You.”


Psalm 138:8 The Lord will fulfill His purpose for me. 

There it is, plain as day.

The could’a-would’a-should’a’s — I have no reason to worry or be afraid or get all verklempt.

Everything is playing out just as it should.


Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord. “Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future.

I’ll hang my hat on that.

Jesus, I trust in You.



 

 

 

 

 

 

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beautybeyondbones

BBB: Because we're all recovering from something. // For speaking/business inquiries: beautybeyondbones@yahoo.com

351 thoughts on “Plans

  1. Sometimes, even though my twenties have long since passed, but I’m in the middle of being alone after my marriage ended I have thoughts just like these you mentioned: Why hasn’t this happened yet? When am I going to meet someone? What if I never meet someone? Will my life be a failure? Am I a failure?

    Thanks for this post. This is the best 7:00 Monday/Thursday show on the interwebs. I always tune in and I always feel good after I finish reading. 🙂 Have a great weekend, and thanks. Keep the faith!

    Liked by 2 people

  2. God has a plan for us all, I’ve just been given mine, at the age of 59&9/12ths ….. So pleased that you have found yours at your early age, “Love, Trust & Understanding, another Holy Trinity xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Aw thank you so much! I’m glad you enjoyed reading it! Morning! Wow you must be on the other side of the world! It’s 7pm here! I’m on my way out the door for dinner with friends! Haha hugs to you xox

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    1. Hi Linda!
      Isn’t it wonderful to know he has plans and purposes for us! My wife and I have been discovering His next purpose for our lives, over the past couple of years, too. We’d all love to see clearly, but my understanding is that it’s quite normal not to see the total picture, I think He prefers it that way, it makes us trust Him more.
      Ann Voskamp (another blogger worth following!) posted something a while back that says it beautifully: “We want clarity — and God gives a call. We want a road map — and God gives a relationship. We want answers — and God gives His hand.”
      May God bless your waiting as He prepares the way for you to fulfil His call!
      Stephen

      Liked by 3 people

  3. Amen, You know I loved it! Sunday at church the message was Who’s Talking About Jesus? I know some people. God Bless You great Job won’t he do it!!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I remember feeling this way in my twenties after having been in 9 weddings, none of which were my own. At some point I began to pray for my future spouse. And I did meet him and now 16 years and three kids later…. I can tell you, He knows the plans He has for you….plans to prosper and not to harm you. And you must love yourself too regardless of whether you’re married or not. I loved everything you wrote and relate to all of it. And yes, Jesus I trust in you!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. ” how is it that God always finds a way to encourage His children?
    There is no technological interface that He can’t infiltrate. :)”

    I’m tellin’ ya…the Holy Spirit is Not computer illiterate.

    ” Everything is playing out just as it should. ” Tole ya so…

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Amen! I know when I trust in God, He’s always lead me better than ANYTHING I could come up with on my own. Being 54 now, I can tell you that with not only faith, but factual events that revealed that to me plainly too many times to count. God is good, all the time! Here’s another verse for you. Joshua 1:9 (NIV)
    9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” That “do not be afraid,” can also be translated as “fear not” which is the most often used phrase in the bible. Think God is trying to tell us something? Love you and what you share with us!

    Liked by 3 people

  7. GURL…like, ALL of this… #YAAAS Thank you for sharing–I’ve been to that place myself and like you I’m finally learning to be okay with God’s plan even if I don’t achieve the things I had planned for me, because His plan is the better one anyway. God bless you and take care!

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  8. This is amazing – I have been quoting Jeremiah 29:11 to myself this morning over my desire/need to move house. Ever since I made this decision 18 months ago, I have had a bunch of stuff thrown at me, including polymyalgia (now gone) and 2 accidents. Things have not yet worked out as planned, and sometimes the task looks impossible. But didn’t Jesus say, “Take my yoke upon you and learn from me … For my yoke is easy and my burden is light’ (Matt 11:29-30)? The hardest thing to do is to let go and rest in Him, but that is what we need to do. Bless you. Stay strong and do not fall into the enemy’s traps.

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  9. Great post 🙂 Sometimes when were young (and I am including myself from a past perspective) we all say when we want this to happen when we grow up or that to happen and once we reach that age (myself included from a present perspective) we see that we have not met what we wanted, but I myself have decided to just be content about it and take into account that I might get something better or something equally satisfying and you may be realizing it too just based on what I have read so far on this blog entry. Anyway, keep up the great work as always 🙂

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  10. Hanging on to the “what ifs” and “where should my life be now” can be crippling. Our lives never turn out as we planned, but God is always in control. May He continue to encourage and bless you!

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  11. I had my girls at 30 and 36. I was doubtful in my twenties, that I even wanted kids. I didn’t have half the intelligence or heart you have acquired. Hold tight. You are exactly where you need to be. God honors faithfulness and longs to give you the desires of your heart. Keep smiling and hold onto to your faith. His timing is always the right time. 🙂

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  12. I think we all – particularly women – have the tendency to play the “what if” game and yes, it is dangerous. At nearly 50, I have accomplished NOTHING that I thought I would have. But the thing is my plan is not God’s plan – Dang it! My plan is small and short sighted. His plan is GREAT.

    Your use of this blog to tell your story, your bravery to talk about the challenges you’ve faced, your sense of humor, all of it has been a gift from God to all of us who have the opportunity to ready. God is faithful. He does have a plan for you and its amazing. Until you meet that person you are supposed to meet, know that the rest of us are cheering for you and cheered BY you every day.

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  13. This is exactly what I was dealing with in that I was a little worried about the future and had no idea what was going to happen, but I learned to trust in Him and (mentioned again hehe) allow Him to write my story. And Jeremiah 29:11 is one of my favorite verses! 😀 God has a wonderful plan and purpose for your life and all you have to do is to continue trusting and having faith in Him and just patiently wait. May God bless you!

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  14. BBB, I believe “trust” in God’s plans for us is a word for the Body right now.

    I read your piece, chuckled, and thought, “Abba, You are so rad!

    I’m writing about a season when He told me not to use planners (freaked me out, lol) for a time–which was a trust issue, of course.

    I’ll publish it Saturday.

    I love being sisters in Christ with you, mami chula 😁

    Keeping our husbands in my prayers 😘

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Atheist here, so I skipped over the God stuff, but I like the gist. Planning is pointless and mostly leads to anxiety and disappointment. I think there’s a saying that goes something like “Life is what happens to you while you’re waiting for your plans to eventuate”? Something like that anyway. I find I’m much happier just going with the flow and letting life happen. Don’t plan further than what you’re going to eat for breakfast (and even then, be open to a change of plans. You don’t want to stick with your oatmeal if a doughnut comes along 😉 ).
    Xxx

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    1. Hi Kelly! Haha that is great advice. There’s got to be some spontaneity in life. And going with the flow can open up doors we never imagined. Glad you liked the piece! Now…gonna go get me a donut! 😎☺️😂 Hugs and love xox

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  16. Such a great post. Playing the what if game is a dangerous thing to do that can lead us into a hot mess. But we all do it, especially women, myself included. God does have a plan for you, so keep your head up high. Tfs

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  17. Absolutely! He’s got you…and wants the absolute best for you! And try to find joy in the here and now…God’s got blessings and surprises for you there, too. BTW…I love 19 kids and Counting. Don’t know how she manages to stay so calm though…:-) Enjoyed the post!

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  18. I have been learning to be patient a lot this week. Mostly I’ll get an email at work and not be able to respond to it and start getting anxiety about having to respond (which is why you should not check email at work). I told myself to just relax, what I wanted to do would be there when I got out of work. All in His time 🙂

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    1. Hi Ellie! I can so relate. Communication these days is so instantaneous, it’s hard to not feel that pressure. You’re right though-it will be there when you get out of work! Such a great lesson. Hope you have a beautiful weekend! Hugs and love my friend xox

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  19. LOVE it! (And, I happen to love Pope Francis too….shhhh! Don’t tell my Protestant followers!!)

    I’ve kinda been in this funk too. Here’s the thing– God gave me a husband, but marriage is far from what I dreamed it would be. That’s the thing about dreams– they aren’t real. Even when it appears they are about to come true, reality slaps you in the face, because nothing can be as perfect as we dream it to be.
    Sometimes I think our womanly desire to fall in love and find “the one” is a manifestation of our desire to be found completely in Christ. Wild idea, eh? My husband can never be all the things I want him to be, because he’s just a man (and a very good man, but still….).
    I’m not sayin’ that you shouldn’t keep pursuing the married life, or the search for your Prince Charming. I’m just sayin’, you already are completely held in the love you crave. After the honeymoon ends, that’s where the trials of human relationship will send you– right back into His arms. Because that’s where you truly want to be anyway;)

    Liked by 5 people

    1. Wow what a powerful reflection! Thank you so much for this. You’re so right-I think ultimately that’s what it comes from-being found and known in Christ. Have you read the book Captivating? Your words reminded me of that. It’s a great read. Hugs and love xox

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  20. I just love this post! As I was reading it, i thought of a lot of cool things, but I one of them is from Romans 8. All things work together for good to those who love God, to those called according to His purpose. I have a hard time believing this sometimes, especially during tough times. Anyway, being you, where you are right now, might lead to more wonderful posts, encouraging us to choose life. Peace and continue to be blessed.

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  21. “There is no technological interface that He can’t infiltrate.” That’s gold!
    I’ve got ulcerative colitis – not nearly as bad as you by the sound of it, but I can sympathise about it adding to having your life’s plans thrown into confusion. Funny how life generally throws life plans into confusion! (Sometimes it’s not so funny, no sir-ee, not at all..). But Jesus, I trust in you. Anyway, I love this post. You’re a wise and talented lady – and oh my gosh – still so young!!!!!

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  22. I’m at the opposite end of your rope. I’m almost 67 and can barely walk. I have so many things wrong with me I think my only healthy organ is my gizzard. But my heart is right, thanks to the grace of Jesus. I’m Methodist, but when the Pope is quoting scripture, we all can learn. I promise you there will be good times ahead,as well as bad times. But God can use anything to help us grow in faith and trust in the Lord, if we will turn them over to Him.
    I am trying to maintain my own blog. I’m having a hard time figuring out how to write my url so people can find me. www://GloryAllAroundMe.com. Or Gloryallaroundme.com or http://gloryallaroundme.com. My latest entry was titled 5 Handy Hints for Living Independently Part 1. Taking a Shower. I have plenty of ideas; my brain and my hands are just not always ready to write at the same time.
    I am already proud of you for what you have accomplished in your short life. Overcoming anorexia is a giant deal. I hope you have worked on whatever set it off. As a high school teacher, I could recognize the sign and symptoms of various conditions, but I didn’t have the training to treat them. One boy was anorexic, and I was able to refer him to the counsellors, while his other teachers never noticed because he was male. I really admire you. Please keep the faith! By the way, what is your name?

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    1. Hi friend! Thank you so much for sharing this. You’re so right-he can use anything for good. Sounds like a very interesting blog! I look forward to reading your words! And I haven’t actually shared my name yet. I’m keeping this anonymous (at least for now) so you can call me BBB. I hope that’s alright:) Hugs and love xox

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  23. Love, Love, Love your writing friend<3 So fun and encouraging. The way you bring the deep truths of God to such a practical light is such a gift. Keep it up– like a city on a hill.

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  24. Awww, sweet. Been there done that. Now putting my trust in God and expecting the best from him. ❤️ really like your posts. Keep on shining.
    Love & prayers,
    MM

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  25. What is that saying? We make plans and God laughs….Nothing in my life has gone according to plan. My plan. ..I remind myself all the time but it’s not for me to make plans when God already has the master

    I have only followed you a short time, but long enough to know that you are special… And I am sure will be blessed with many of the things your heart desires
    ❤️

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  26. I hear ya, I’ve been going through the same thing lately/for the past decade (lol!) and I’m in my 30’s. But I will say, even if the wait is long, eventually you do meet amazing people you never thought you’d meet who make you really glad you didn’t marry someone else yet. 😉

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  27. Wow, I love this! It came at the right time, this is exactly what I’ve been struggling with recently. Possibly even the sign I was asking God for today. I want all the same things you stated above and have started to question why and what’s happening in my life (due to a recent break-up). I stumbled upon 1 Corinthians 7 yesterday and it reminded me to be patient. I think I’m ready for the next stage, but He has a different plan and it will come when He knows we’re ready.

    Thanks so much! Keep it up and may you find peace in Him.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks friend, I’m so glad it resonated with you. I’m sorry about the recent break up. That’s tough. But you’re right-we have to be patient for His perfect plan:) sending you a big hug my friend

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  28. Great tie in with Scripture. I praise the the Lord for you, B’s. Posts like these are encouraging, especially when Scripture is tied in.

    He tells us that His ways aren’t our ways. Which means that our ways, would be horrible for us. So even the rough stuff we encounter, is all filtered through His nail-scarred and loving hands. And that is ALL good for us.

    Keep your chin up, stay in the Word! Grace to you and peace!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Nathan! Thanks so much for these kind words, friend. So glad you enjoy my posts! You’re so right-His ways are the best and we just have to trust and keep the faith! So glad you stopped by! Hugs and love xox

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  29. Beauty , my friend, everyone that God uses in a significant way He takes on a journey, like Moses, or Job, or King David, Joseph, or queen Ester or Ruth or eacchh Jonah, and it is never, ever, an ordinary journey. nor usually an easy journey, but at the end of the journey, God has a man or woman prepared for the task he has prepared for that man or woman. Beauty you just might call yourself a journeyman er person.

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  30. So Pharaoh dreamed of seven fat cows and seven skinny cows. As a fourth grader, the ten children were your apprehension of the energy that God was going to invest in you. Wonder what it will actually manifest as?

    Have you read Lauren Daigle’s life history? She sang God’s praises all during her childhood, spontaneously and a capella. Then she got onto a college track in high school and set her music aside. She came down sick, sick, sick – to the point of being forced out of school. While she was laid up, she came back to singing God’s praises.

    Sometimes life’s difficulties are external resistance to the manifestation of God’s grace through us, and sometimes they are course corrections that come from deep within our soul.

    You’re creating a pretty big family here.

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    1. Hi Brian! Wow thank you for this. Yes, I feel so blessed to have gotten to know such wonderful people like yourself through this blog! And wow that sounds like a powerful testimony Lauren has. I’ll definitely check out her stuff! Hope you have a great weekend! Hugs and love xox

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  31. thank you for this lovely post. 🙂 yes indeed, there’s not technological interface that God can’t infiltrate HAHA. but yup, trusting in God, trusting in His promises, is so so so ever crucial, cuz His plans are certainly not to harm us, but to lift us up, so we can lift His name on high. ❤ thank you lovely. xx

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  32. Thank you for this post. I am happy to find someone who could inspire women who have the same condition. i thought anorexia is something incurable. It’s great that you have also found inspiration in the Words of the Lord. God bless!

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  33. No Way are you a failure, as to meeting someone I was 30 before I meet my wife to be and 37 before we got married – she wanted 7 children only due to the “Sound of music” film
    We only have one daughter, all the hospial would allow, due to the epilepsy my wife suffers from, thankfully more under control these days
    Your sesne of humor shines through in your posts and you brighten may days with the use of funny gif images
    Continue to allow God to use you as blessing to others

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    1. Thanks Graham. That really means a lot. Praise God that your wife’s epilepsy is doing better and that you were able to have a precious daughter! I appreciate your encouragement. Hugs and love xox

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