Well guys, I officially cannot believe I’m doing this.
Seriously. I’m sitting here thinking about it, and I’m like…
Yep. That pretty much sums it up.
In case you missed the title, I’m sharing a photo with you from my past. When I was in the throes.
The video says it all…why I haven’t previously shared a photo, why I am choosing to now, and what I think when I see this image today.
Just a gentle note, this image could be triggering, so please view at your own discretion. (Image at 4:30)
Thanks for watching, and thanks for taking this journey with me.
Without further ado… (Click on the photo or click here to play 😉 )
382 responses to “Sharing a Photo of my Past”
Woman! You are so strong!! Keep it up!
Thanks friend. Really appreciate it! Hugs and love xox
I want to say it was by chance you stopped by my blog. I know we have different eating disorders but I still feel your pain. I think we crossed paths for a reason. I’m proud of you. You’re a strong amazing person. I’m thankful our paths crossed. God bless you.
Chrystal
Thank you so much Chrystal. That’s so kind of you to say. I’m glad our paths crossed as well. Stay strong, warrior. Cheering for you in your recovery! Hugs and love xox
I have always loved your authenticity of your posts. You are brave in your written posts, but Oh, wow the heart and vulnerability of your video comes through on all levels. Thank you for sharing, thank you for being honest about your journey. You’re an inspiration of hope for people to stay or start a journey of healing.
💜Alexis
Thank you so much Alexis! Wow what kind things to say. I’m so glad you’ve enjoyed the video. Sending massive hugs. Xox
Simply amazing. Thank you for sharing!
Thank you so much Douglas. I appreciate it. Hugs and love xox
Hey girl I just watched your video and I have to say I was so touched by how open you were being. I haven’t followed your blog as long as some of your other readers but I felt so connected to you immediately especially when you said you’re grateful to be alive. I know how that feels to be thankful just to be where you are now because I’m nearing my second year of staying clean.
Aw thank you so much my friend. Thanks for taking the time to watch. Yes. Very grateful indeed. That’s awesome. Congrats on two years. That’s something to be proud of. Hugs and love xox
God is good, He brought you from there to where you are now…..Keep on growing with God. You are His beautiful child.
Amen to that. God is SO good and I am grateful for His healing in my life. Thanks for your encouraging words! Hugs and love xox
Moving and powerful, Caralyn. How brave of you to share the photo with us. I would say that much like your journey to showing parts of your face in photos to doing video, it’s been a similar journey for you to get to the point to show that photo, but also note how grateful you are to be healthy and alive. I didn’t see that as a dramatic admission, but one based in faith and hope. I don’t want to make showing your face on a blog as important as what you’ve been through, but I find the journeys similar.
The old saying I used to hear growing up is while I may not be where I want to be, thank God I’m not where I was. That seems to apply to you, dear. Here’s hoping to continued health and happiness for you.
Thanks T:) I really appreciate your kind words. That’s so true-God has delivered us and we’re NOT where we were. We’re a work in progress and that’s okay:) thanks for watching. Hugs and love xox
You’re very welcome. Back at cha! 🙂
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You are such a strong remarkable woman. You have overcome, but just survived but overcame and thrived. So proud of you. You are such an inspiration. Keep shining your light.
Thank you so much friend 🙂 I can’t tel you how much that means to me. Thanks for watching. Hugs and love xox
I know how much courage that took…I felt it, as it brought tears to my eyes. Do you know what an inspiration you are? I’m glad you’re here and thanks for sharing and being open and honest and letting people know that there IS a way back.
Thanks so much! Aww you’re so sweet. Seriously that means the world. You are a blessing to me. Hugs and love xox
Hugs right back! 🙂
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You are a beautiful soul my Angel!!! You are an inspiration to ALL and I know it took a lot to share your story and photo! Know we ALL love you, your Angels love you and are always with YOU, and God loves you and is always there for and proud of you! xoxo
Thank you so much! Gosh, you’re such an encourager. Thank you my friend. Sending big big hugs xox
You are courageous, and I just want to say, “thank you.” Thank you for sharing more of your story in an even deeper, more personal, visual way… Also, I’m so very grateful, too, that you’re both alive and healthy and blessed. And may God continue to bless you abundantly!
Thank YOU for being such a source of encouragement! It really means so much. God is good. Massive hugs to you xox
Thank you for being so real. Again, you leave me speechless and deeply touched inside. (just feelings) <3 <3
Thank you Matthew. I appreciate it:) have a great night xx
I wish I could put words to the feelings I felt throughout your video, not just the photo. I don’t think I ever will have the words. Too many feelings all gathered together. All I know is that I am so grateful that I followed your blog. Not a blog I would have normally followed since I don’t have an eating disorder. I have my own “disorder” and your posts and messages have always been so inspiring for me. Even from a deep emotional expression such as this video, I leave feeling uplifted and truly touch within my heart. Filled with hope. You have a good night also, Caralyn. 🙂
Thanks again ❤️
You are brave for sharing this. Thanks for being an inspiration to others. Bless you!
Thanks Dino! I appreciate you taking the time to watch! Big hugs xox
Bless you! I so felt your emotion watching this. You are very down to earth and courageous. You are “Beauty beyond bones”. I’m fortunate to have found your blog. Bless again and stay strong and please keep blogging. ♥
Thank you so much Dann:) thank you for watching and for such kind words. Hugs and love xox
very brave post! as someone who has seen a close family member struggle with anorexia I know how hard it can be–it’s awesome to see how far you have come:D
Thank you Christopher. I’m sorry you have witnessed this first hand in your family. I appreciate your kind words of encouragement. Sending massive hugs. Thanks for watching xox
You are so strong and brave. May God shower you with His abundant blessings <3
Thank you friend. Yes, God is good and I am so grateful for His healing in my life. Hugs and love xox
The courage and beauty you display, both inside and out, is truly admirable. Much love to you!
Thank you Paul. You’re so kind. I appreciate you 🙂 sending big hugs! Xox
Hi! I came here and watched your video. I know I am still young but thank you for sharing this. I smiled when you said you are glad to be alive. Well, stay strong!
XOXO
Thank you so much! That’s so kind of you. I appreciate you taking the time to watch! Big hugs xox
Hugs xox
Im so touched with the video really ToT
❤️❤️❤️seriously I’m touched by your words❤️❤️❤️😘truly. Thank you
You’re welcome 💋
And thank you for posting. Looking forward for more of your posts. (Sorry if my English is not that good 😜)
Haha it’s great! I wouldn’t have known it wasn’t your native tongue if you hadn’t had said something! ❤️❤️❤️
Eh? Really hahaha then I won’t say it again to anyone, then.
Haha 👍👍👍👍
Nice to talk to you. Then, I shall watch anime again. Talk to you again some other time 😉
Sounds good! Have a great night!
Have a great night to you. A morning for me.
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You’re a true inspiration, Caralyn.
Thank you Laura Beth. Truly. That means a lot. Sending big big hugs xox
Reblogged this on Musings On My Life.
Thank you for the reblog! Big hugs xox
Very inspirational.
Thanks Marques. Sending big hugs xox
very powerful and effective message…keep up!!
Thanks Mihran! You’re so kind! Hugs and love xox
God and your journey have made you beautiful with a powerful message. I am thankful you are here to share the journey with us.
Thanks so much my friend. I really appreciate it. Hugs and love xox
Wowwww. Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing your struggles with us! You are beautiful inside and out <3
Thanks Anna. You are so kind to say that. Thanks for watching. Big hugs xox
What a brave, raw, powerful video. Thank you so much for sharing it with us. I know that must have been really difficult. You’re a beautiful soul. I wish I could give you a hug. <3 Much love to you.
Thank you Melissa. You are so kind to say that. Awww! I’ll take that hug! 🙂 sending one back at’cha! Sending my love xox
[…] via Sharing a Photo of my Past — BeautyBeyondBones […]
Thanks for the link up! Hugs and love xox
Reblog on my site, hope that is ok, your words of courage and strength are inspiring. I like how you remind us that when making a change for the better in our lives it has to be on all levels. Thank you for sharing, I am sure you will help others who are struggling.
Thank you so much! I’m honored that you would share it! Very grateful. Have a lovely night! Hugs and love xox
This was so amazing, powerful, intimate, touching, and inspiring. Thank you for sharing.
Oh my gosh thank you so much. I really appreciate you taking the time to watch. Sending big hugs xox
You strike me as a brave person. And I can only imagine what you have overcome.
Thanks again ❤️❤️❤️
You are a very courageous person Carolyn. Thank you for sharing your story. And God has done a wonderful work in you!
Thank you friend. 🙂 that really means a lot. Thank you for taking the time to watch and for being such a wonderful source of encouragement!! Hugs and love xox
Peace.
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Thank you so much for sharing this. I know it took a lot of bravery on your part, but it is an extreme act of generosity. Again, thank you, BBB.
Thank you so much Timi. That really means a lot. Sending the biggest hugs and love xox
Hugs and love right back at you!
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It must have taken a crazy amount of courage to post that picture. I can’t even imagine.
Kudos to you for having reached a healthier mindset both physically and spiritually. And may God be praised for all of His help. 🙂
Thanks friend. Yeah t was pretty nerve wracking! Thanks for your kind words. God is good. Hugs and love xox
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There is great strength and power in your testimony. I thank god for your courage and willingness to share it with us and for allowing me to be a small fraction of this story. You are a blessing to many and are truly beautiful and truly being the light of the world.
Thank you my friend. Your words touch my heart. Thank you for watching and for offering such a kind note of encouragement. Big hugs xox
Always
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I appreciate you and your gratitude for being here. You are wonderfully made. Thank you.
Thank you so much:) that really means a lot. Sending hugs xox
And I am hugging you back! *SWEEZE*
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You are so brave and amazing to share this. God bless.
Thanks Mary:) that means a lot. Thanks for watching. Big hugs xox
Great post 🙂 It is never easy for any human being who is gone through a painful part of their past to depict it in candid detail, but you were very courageous to do so and I am so proud that you are now a happy individual with a life that is continuing to flourish. Anyway, keep up the great work as always 🙂
Thanks John, that really means a lot. You’re right-it was deffffinitely pretty scary to press publish on this one. Thanks for being such an awesome source of support and encouragement 🙂 hope you’re having a great week! sending big hugs xox
Through your healing, so many more will be healed. Praying for you sis! Thank you for your bare, brave honesty. Someone will be saved because of this. <3
Thank you Kay, that’s really kind of you to say. And I so appreciate the prayers! Sending big hugs. God is good xox
thank you for sharing your struggles as well as your strength with us.
Thank you so much. I really appreciate your encouragement. Hope you’re having a great week! Hugs and love xox
The Lord truly makes you brave…continue in His grace, Ana.
Thanks Vanessa, so true. God is so good and I am forever grateful for His healing power in my life. Thanks for watching! Big hugs xox
There is a part of you that holds a inner peace like no other. Most of your story tells of a person that battled and conquered a very nasty battle that so many battle. The first part comes when you see that tragedy is coming. Second do what you must to correct it. Third talk to someone about it. All of which you have done.
Now as my point, It took much courage to express your feelings, Sure before showing your picture you made statement of worry for those who might not like the trigger then after showing your picture you hesitated.
So it did have a flash back not only of that life, but also the worry for those other who have battled or maybe battling it. By you opening this wound in your life you may help other readers who are battling it now, and just need that little push to get them started.
Despite that statement through the whole video, I seen areas peace within your life that many don’t show, even after talking about certain situations including yours.
The rest of the presentation you emotion was more of a person who had let go of the past, found Peace within and took control of their life. Keep strong and your life will prosper.
Thank you very much. I appreciate you taking the time to watch! Hugs and love xox
You’re beautiful..thanks for being so brutally honest and transparent. I wish there were more people like you in this world. Where you begin in life is not where you you’ll end. Stay on course, your journey of recovery is inspiring. I pray that those who read your blog , see tbe beauty of a spiritual human being who overcame adversity. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you so much Pat. What a kind thing to say! You’re right-the journey is lifelong. Thanks for stopping by. Have a beautiful Friday! Hugs and love xox
Thanks so much for sharing that part of your story with us! It’s so inspiring to see how God has really worked in your life, and is now using you as a living testimony of His faithfulness! 🙂
Thank you so much friend. Amen to that-God has done so much in my life and I am forever grateful for His healing. Thanks for stopping by. Sending massive hugs xox
Thanks for sharing. You are an extremely strong woman for overcoming and then sharing your story.
Thank you so much for this note of encouragement. It means a lot. Hugs and love xox
Beauty! I’m glad you hithtebutton! 🙂 First, very brave to share this way. I would not have guessed that was a picture of you. To my eyes, it didn’t look as bad as I had imagined from your earliest descriptions. I remember you describing the hair loss and more. Still, the fact that it looked nothing like YOU tells me just how dire things were.
Second, I don’t think you’re being dramatic by saying you’re glad to be alive. Remember that I’ve been there 3 times! I’m glad to be alive; that’s just a fact for me as much as it is for you! And I can think of 15,000+ people who are at least as glad as you are!
You’ve done a great work in ridding yourself of those last emotional wounds by revisiting your pains and salvation with us! You’ve healed with family friends from the past, you’ve shared you name, your face, and now the face of your ED. In the process, you are a relentless witness to the healing power of Jesus, showing others the way from whatever they suffer, be it ED or something else.
Thanks for not just being a blogger, but being a friend to me and all of your readers. Blessings to you!
Hey Jeff! Aw, thank you. That’s kind of you to say. I’m so grateful that we’re friends too! 🙂 You constantly bring a smile to my face, and send me so much kindness through the inter webs 🙂 hehe and Amen to that – Jesus is so good. I seriously owe it all to Him – ev-er-y-thing! I know you know this too. Sending massive hugs to you, Jeff. Have a terrific weekend. xox
Such courage! Well done. I’m grateful that you’re alive too.
Thank you so much for taking the time to watch my video! So kind of you to say. Sending huge hugs xox
You are incredibly strong & beautiful!
Aw Courtney! You’re so kind to say that. Thank you:) have a beautiful evening! Hugs and love xox
Thank you so much, BBB, for posting this, and sharing your wounds, your life. I am so thankful to God for your beautiful recovery. May you continue to draw your strength, courage and identity from God and allow His beautiful Truths of who you really are to permeate and envelop every fiber of your being. For you are His masterpiece! And a most gorgeous one at that <3
Hi Mindy! Thank you so much for this kind note of encouragement. I really appreciate your support. Amen to that-God has truly transformed my heart and healed it and for that I am eternally grateful. Thanks for stopping by. Have a beautiful evening. Xox
i wanted to click the like button but that doesnt describe how i feel, if there was a love button i would’ve clicked that, thank you for sharing.
Thank you so much Michael. That really means a lot. Thanks for watching and for affirming me. I hope you’re having a great week. Hugs and love xox
That was amazing. Thank you. Very moving Carolyn.
Thank you so much Daniel. I truly appreciate your kindness. Sending big hugs xox
I love and admire your strength and openness–thank you for this uplifting video!
Thank you so much Jenn. That means the world. Thanks for watching and for the encouragement! Xox
Sending you so much Light and love. Keeping your focus on the divine is such a key huh? Blessings my friend <3
Thank you so much for this. You’re right:) Hugs and love xox
My good friend. That was deep. That was brave.
Thanks friend. I appreciate it. Hugs to you. Xox
Also-I thought of one more tip to answer your question from earlier: use hashtags! And promote across all social media platforms 👍hope that’s helpful ❤️
No thanks needed but thank you to you, your advice is helpful. I’m just trying to be like you when I grow up. Lol 🙂
Haha aw shucks 😉❤️😍☺️ seriously though thank you xx
The other night I had a dream that me think about you. I wrote about it, it’s called Beauty Beyond Me. It’s probably not what you’d expect but you gotta read all the way till the end. Let me know if you like it. Be honest. I guess it is kind of about you. Lol
And thank you again for the poem. I read and am really really struck by your writing. You have a lot of talent.
I am so happy you liked it. Thank you for all your kind words and honesty AND being a somewhat of a muse. That sincerely means the world.
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Please read Internet Crush and tell me what you think.
Was it too much?
Was what too much?
My comment before the last one.
I wrote Internet Crush for you
Your sharing will help so many others. You are strong. Stay strong!
Thank you so much. That’s so kind of you to say! Hugs and love xox
Beautiful video, I teared up when you looked at your own photo. You’re very brave to share such a moment.
Great blog 🙂
Thank you so much. I really appreciate you taking the time to watch and for your encouragement. Hugs and love xox
What a real and beautiful video. Couldn’t take my eyes away. So inspiring and sending a lot of love your way. Keep it up. You’re doing great. X
Thank you friend. What a kind thing to say. Thanks for watching and for encouraging me. Means the world. Hugs and love xox
God bless you Caralyn.
Thank you so much Mike❤️
You are an amazing woman! I cried watching because what you said touched me so much, I have been through so much and seeing this has helped me a lot. You will help so many people with this video. I wish I could give you such a big hug love. Stay Awesome!
Thank you so much, Matt. Wow, I am so touched that it resonated with you like that. I appreciate you watch and for your encouragement. Hugs and love xox
If you ever need a ear or shoulder, I am here for ya. Just let me know okay 😉
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A very brave post, I really admire your strength and although I haven’t met you and probably never will I too am grateful that you are alive! Very touched 🙂
Tracy xx
Thank you Tracy. What a kind thing to say. Thanks for watching! Sending massive hugs xox
Sending them right back, you are amazing just remember that 😊xx
❤️❤️❤️thanks again ❤️❤️❤️
“Beauty Beyond Bones”
Thanks for sharing, there is definitely beautiful in us through the eyes of God.
Thank you Jireh, thank you so much for this encouragement. Amen to that-God makes us beautiful. Hugs and love xox
I felt all kinds of feelies and emotions throughout the video. That was brave of you to share a dark moment of your life. Though honestly I still couldn’t see the physical/emotional pain in the picture, it was that beaming radiant smile i bet. I’m sure you know the difficulties well enough but I just saw a brave smiley girl. If a saw anymore than I was suppose to based on that photo that would probably make me judgmental wouldn’t it? Arguably, if we saw more of the body it would be more obvious. Maybe my eyes are not adjusted to critically analyze a person based on their facial appearance, probably for the best. Things have definitely got better though. You look so good now! Much Love.
Nam
Thank you so much Nam. I really appreciate your encouragement. Yeah, I didn’t want to share a full body, as that would have been to jarring. Thank you for your kind words. It means a lot. Sending hugs xox
All through the time I have been reading your Blog I have never focused on the anorexia because of course it isn’t there to be glorified like you said, I focused on your faith, I mean wow, I had the picture of the roman centurion when he went up to Jesus and had so much faith in Him, you have been through so much and you have so faith in Him, I always see your inner beauty the beautiful spirit that’s in your heart, that’s what has kept me reading and it has given me so much encouragement and I am so thankfully for you being in my life <3 and about the other thing, you are a new creation, that past you I know is gone, washed in the glorious blood of the lamb, I understand the mental scars will always be there but Jesus is working on those day by day and I know God is using this history these struggles as fire for the goodness of God as a testimony of Faith, I am so proud of the progress you have been made even if i wasn't there at the beginning of your recovery, I love you with all my heart sister, you will forever be in my heart if we ever get to meet or not, as I know were are definitely meet one day 😉
Benjamin xxxxx
Thank you so much for this beautiful note of encouragement. I cannot begin to express how much I appreciate your kindness and support, my friend. I’m grateful for you. Hugs and love xox
You have a powerful ministry. I will pray you always have strength for all that you need to do (Philippians 4:13) 😊
Thank you so much, Maria. That means a lot. That’s a great verse! Thanks for the reminder:) sending massive hugs xox
I say that verse often to remind myself too! You are caring for lots of people, stay strong. ❤️
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God is indeed faithful!! Your honesty is changing lives and I fully believe pointing people righy back to Christ.
Thank you so much Matthew. Amen to that. God is so good and faithful. Thanks for stopping by! Have a great weekend! Xox
Thanks for sharing this video with us! I love the way you end with a total heart of gratitude for being alive! God brought you through to be a testimony to others. Thanks again
Thank you friend:) yes, I am so grateful to be alive. God is good and has brought me through a lot.thanks for watching behave w great weekend. Hugs and love xox
You are brave, and beautiful. God is doing amazing things through your life!!
Thank you so much. Wow, that is so kind of you to say. Hugs and love xox
Thank you for sharing such a vulnerable moment with us. I often look back on old pictures not out of envy of not being that thin anymore but to see how far I’ve come and all the progress I have made. Yes it is weight that it noticeable to the eye but looking at those pictures makes you feel how far your mind body and soul have come. Kuddos to you, keep inspiring everyone around you! <3
Thank you friend. That’s so true-there are a lot of things that can’t be captured in a photo. Thanks for watching. Sending big hugs xox
Thank you for sharing. You look happier and healthier.
Thanks Tikeetha:) that means a lot. Yes on both accounts! Hugs and love xox
You are such a brave and strong woman. It takes a lot of courage to share your past, especially something that was this difficult. You are an inspiration! Sending you love and hugs.♥️
Thank you so much. That really means a lot. Thanks for watching and for you wonderful encouragement. Hugs and love xox
Such strength, such honesty, such a witness! You are a blessing to so many who read this and to all those people who have yet to meet you. I thank our loving Father for you and thank him for the way he has chosen to use you. Thanks
I always thank my God for you because of his grace given you in Christ Jesus. 1 Corinthians 1:4
Hey John! Thank you so much for this beautiful response. Yes, God is so so good and I am grateful for the healing he has done in my life. Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox
Am also impressed how you take the time to respond to the comments. Something I need to learn and no you do not have to respond to this 🙂
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Great post. Great blog. Continue to trust in the Lord. He’s got you! Blessings.
Thank you so much Daniel. I appreciate it. Hugs and love xox
You’re welcome!
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I just wanna find you and give you a big hug! I’m thankful for howfar you’ve come😘😍
Hi Adaugo, Awww that’s so sweet! Thank you! I’ll take that hugs and send a big hug right back at’cha! Thanks for stopping by. Sending all my love xox
Wow. That was very powerful stuff. Thank you for having the courage to share. Maybe it will inspire someone else to summon the strength to set foot on the path to healing.
If you consider the two images side by side, the “current” you shows genuine happiness when you smile. The you in the” throes” may be smiling, but it looks like it’s forced happiness. Smiling because it’s expected.
Keep doing what you are doing, especially if YOU believe it is helping. We are all here for you.
Thanks so much for this kind response. That’s very insightful-it was definitely a forced smile. A frantic smile. A smile that was doing everything it could to conceal the pain inside. So glad to have a genuine smile back:) thanks for your support. Hugs and love xox
Very courageous and inspiring! I had a bout with anorexia back when I was a teen, so this struck a chord with me. You are beautiful, inside AND out.
Thanks Dee, for sharing that part of your past. I appreciate your kind words and encouragement. Sending love and hugs xox
I waited until now to watch this because I wanted to give my full attention to it. You are brave, you are strong… You are brave and strong in the Lord. Keep telling your story because I believe you ARE helping people by sharing your journey. Blessings Jim
Thank you Jim, I really appreciate your encouragement and support. Thanks for taking the time to watch. Big hugs xox
Thank you for sharing. 🙂
Thanks Jacob. I appreciate you taking the time to watch! Hugs and love xox
I love you. You are brave and courageous, giving voice to so many who have not had one.
Thank you so much Jane. That means the world. Thanks for stopping by. Hugs and love xox
My admiration for you only continues to grow! You are so strong, so brave, and incredibly beautiful!
Thank you Kristian, I really appreciate your kindness. Hugs and love xox
It’s clear how big of a step this was for you. Realize that there is power and love in the body of Christ. That power and love will be an amazing support for you as you keep going on your journey. Sharing this tells us where you’ve been and helps us to better understand what you’re going through and what you’re thinking–keep it up and we will support you!!!
In Him,
Tom
Thank you Tom. Amen to that-I have been so touched and blessed by the friendships on here. I am so grateful for you:) thanks for watching and your encouraging words! Hugs and love xox
You have a powerful testimony! Thank you for impacting the world with it!
Thank you so much! Wow what a kind thing to say. Hugs and love xox
Thank you for liking my blog. I’m just starting on my long road to recovery from drug addiction. I find your story to be inspiring. I hope I can beat my own demons. Also you are a much better writer than I am. I have no idea what I’m doing but I find writing to be catharic so I’m going to keep at it. Best wishes.
Thank you so much for this reflection. Know that I am cheering for you on your journey to recovery! 🙂 thanks for stopping by and keep writing! I look forward to reading more! Hugs and love xox
Wow! It’s not like me to struggle for words to say. If I was with you right now, I would be asking, “Can I give you a hug?” Very brave. May god bless you.
Barry P 🙂
Aw, thank you so much Barry! I’ll definitely take the hug! 🙂 sending one right back at’cha! Xox
Consider it done. And thank you. xxx
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Thank you for your post. You have a beautiful story. This disease is so destructive. It took a lot of courage to put that photo out there for the world to see. You have obviously come a long way. You are a beautiful person!
Thanks Michelle for this reflection. I really appreciate your kind words! Hugs and love xox
I understand what a courageous and humbling thing it is to look back and say this was me. We can’t see what is not physically there but you can. I’m so inspired by the example you set. Your light is bright, indeed.
Thank you so much for this encouragement and support. I really appreciate it. Hugs and love xox
You are most welcome, C. Thank you for recharging my happy batteries. Big Dragon Brother hugs in return. 😀
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A friend (who also has a chronic illness) and I have been “email-discussing” the idea of the Gift of Suffering. She and I are both convinced that God will allow (or permit) us to suffer because we can use our suffering to bless others. There are many scriptures that point to this general concept. You, also, have found the gift of suffering (a deeper walk with God, comforting others with the comfort you received from Christ). I am glad that you are on this side. Still, your tribulation developed patience; patience, character (maturity); and maturity, hope. And, hope never fails. In fact, I wonder if I should write a blog about this idea? Do you think people would understand that I am not minimizing their pain and suffering?
Thank you so much for this reflection Rose. That’s such a deep way of thinking about suffering. I definitely think you’re onto something. And amen to that-hope never fails. I’d definitely love to read your thoughts further! Hugs and love xox
AWESOME testimony of God’s goodness and love and power. I’m so glad you were brave and shared this! <3
Aw thank you so much Marie! Thanks for watching and for your kind words! Hugs and love xox
I just wanted to tell you that it’s not dramatic for you to be grateful that you’re alive! Anorexia is a disease that takes so many lives and is so hard to recover from. Your story is such a beautiful testament and honestly, a miracle. I know I feel like I’m being overly dramatic sometimes, and find it so helpful when friends tell me I’m actually realistic in my word choice. So I just wanted to do that for you 🙂
Thank you so much, gosh you are so sweet and encouraging. God has definitely been good to me. I wouldn’t say a miracle is a stretch at all! Thanks for always giving me a nudge of kindness! Big big hugs xox
Hello Friend – While watching your video tonight, one thought kept coming to mind over and over…”but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” Isaiah 40:31 I see you soaring and I am honored to be invited to see you soaring like in eagle. Thanks be to God! 🙂
Thank you M! Oh wow I absolutely love that verse. Such powerful imagery. Thanks for reminding me of it. So glad you stopped by! Thanks for watching! Hugs and love xox
God Bless you! Thanks for sharing your journey with us and for sharing something so personal – that was very courageous; God healed you so that you can turn around and heal others and you do that every time you blog. Keep being you..
Hey there friend! We thank you so much for your kind words. So so true-God did heal me and I am forever grateful for that! Hugs and love xox
That was courageous ! I too had eating disorders for more than half my life… I totally understand anorexia… And bulimia. And how great freedom through Gods grace is!!!🙏
Thank you for sharing
Thank you so much J. I appreciate you sharing that part of your past. So glad that you’ve also found that freedom! Big hugs xox
Your blog’s name resonates more deeply to me now. Thanks, dearest.
Thanks Mar that really means a lot. Thanks for watching! Big hugs xox
That was a touching video and your blog is inspiring. I’m so happy for you. Look at how far you’ve come! You’re amazing and beautiful.
Thank you so much Camie:) so glad you enjoyed the video! Thanks for watching! Hugs and love xox
I’m so happy for you that you acknowledge and recognize how far you’ve come from that chapter of your life. Looking backwards gives us unique insights and perspective to the journey ahead. Thank you for sharing that piece of you.
Thank you so much Reshma, that’s really true. It is a great reminder of the journey. Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox
[…] via Sharing a Photo of my Past — BeautyBeyondBones […]
Thank you so much for the link up! Hugs and love xox
It’s interesting that the Olympic ad led you to reflect on your own story and journey. Life isn’t all about the “highs” and you certainly shared a “low” point, which is very brave of you to do. It’s wonderful to hear your gratitude! I have a friend who recovered from an ED, but we don’t really talk about it much. Following your blog and story makes me think of her…and just reflect that we don’t often know someone’s full story. It’s a reminder to simply be kind and gentle to one another as we all have a different journey in life.
Thank you so much for this reflection. Thank you for taking the time to watch and for your encouragement! I love that:yes, gentleness is such a gift to one another. Hugs and love xox
Powerful…. Our past is what brought us to this moment. It made us who we are today. Rock on, you are amazing!
Thank you so much. Yes it has! Thanks for watching! Hugs and love xox
Your strength, courage, and honesty are compelling and inspirational. I love what you do here on this blog. Thank you for everything you so bravely share!
Oh my gosh thank you so much Serena:) you’re so sweet to say that. Hugs and love xox
Dear Caralyn:
I always get a twinge when you use “authentic.” It still stimulates the thought that your feel a need to justify yourself before us. But I think that your revelation here is really important to me in getting “calibrated” (another sense of making my experience of your story “authentic”) regarding the depth of your struggle. So, if it’s possible, could you place the photo in context? Was this before or after your intervention? I’m assuming that the hair is the orange fuzz that grew in after your lost your original crop.
However, I understand if you don’t wish to elaborate.
Thank-you for providing this image to those of us that haven’t suffering ED or similar disorders. I had brief associations with stick-thin women that were obviously bulimic or anorexic, but never someone so terribly wasted by the disease. I didn’t understand, and I an grateful to have benefited from your courage.
You are so blessed by your physiological recovery. That also inspires hope for those engaged in the fight to pull loved ones through to health.
Brian
Thank you so much for this reflection and perspective Brian. Yeah it definitely shows the severity of my disease. This was before I went to inpatient. My senior prom. Answering these questions is bringing up some negative emotions so I’m going to just leave it there. Thanks for understanding. Xx
I understand entirely.
At one point, I was sending Christmas reflection to Cardinal Mahoney out here in Los Angeles. In one of them, I suggested that those that have strong hearts bring them to the cross for Christ to use in healing others.
Mine is held out to you.
Brian
Thank you friend:) you are a blessing ❤️
BBB, thank you for sharing this visual part of your story with us. I know it was a big step and even bigger act of vulnerability for you to do so, my beloved friend and sister in Christ!
How I do so thank God for you! I am thankful you are with us 🙂 <3
How do you spell your name, by the way 🙂
Hey JT, thank you so much for this encouragement. That’s so kind of you to say! I’m grateful for you! Sending massive hugs xoxo
You are very welcome 🙂 And. I need those massive hugs today. Thanks, love!
Well then I’m sending those hugs by the boatload! ☺️☺️☺️
🙂
<3 Thank you for sharing your journey.
You really show what strength is.
Wow that’s so kind of you to say! Thank you! Hugs and love xox
Any advise you have for a new blogger.
Hmmmm just to write about what you’re passionate about and be on all social media outlets! 👍 hope that helps! Have a great weekend!
Thank you very much.
❤️👌👍
Very moving …
Thanks Ted. I appreciate you taking the time to watch. Hugs and love xox
I love your vulnerability in this. Right now I’m taking a Christian counseling course and have learned the value of vulnerability in the process of healing. What you did by sharing that photo with us was brave, and risky for you. Thank you for trusting us and being you, just the way you are 🙂
I can clearly see such a difference between your old self and who you are now. What a testimony that is! I’m blessed to read your blogs. As a missionary and someone who works in ministry as a lifestyle, I love seeing people like you who are so inspiring by just being you the way God made you to be, and not even serving in some kind of church ministry or something else.
Thank you for being you 🙂
-Jonathan
Thank you so much Jonathan, wow I am so touched by your words. God is good. Hugs and love xox
Dear Beauty, You are truly beauty beyond bones – That is to say; bones are all sort of challenges you face in life and you have grown beyond them, stronger beyond their strongness, for the Creator has wish it to be so. Thanking you with love for your kind gesture and liked on my little work. God bless and keep you.
Thank you so much for this beautiful and heartfelt reflection. So glad you stopped by. God is good. Hugs and love xox
I didn’t think I would cry, but I did. I know that face and I’m so grateful for your sharing. You look like a transformed and beautiful, healthy woman now-who managed to anti age in the process! Blown away.
Oh my gosh thank you so much Ruth! I’m sorry to have made you cry! Thank you for your wonderfully kind encouragement. Grateful for you xox
I’m glad it made me cry. You’re a total inspiration.
❤️❤thank you again my friend xox️❤️❤️
This took guts, real guts and obviously was not without cost to you. I trust and pray that God will continue to bless you in your courage and honesty. As a close Christian friend of me said before his dementia robbed him of his mind – “being a Christian does not mean we will not have to go through tough times. What it does mean is that we are not alone in those times.” Oh – and thanks for liking one of my poems. For someone just starting out with a Blog it is greatly encouraging. I hope you will find others relevant/useful.
Thanks friend. I really appreciate your encouraging words. Wow, what a powerful quote from your friend. Very very true. Hugs and love xox
So it’s been a few posts since I left a really complete comment 😉
You know there have been a few occasions where I kind of just rampaged through facebook deleting everything. Not for the same reasons of course but I don’t really like to think about some periods in my life, so I can relate a little bit and with that as a starting point it makes me wonder just how much junk I’m still ignoring in the trunk because I just don’t want to go there / remember that person / admit that was me. I’m a very reserved and very self-absorbed person–the kind that may not remember your name the first time because I was too worries about what I was going to say next / what tone I was going to use / whether a bad pun would be appreciated by someone I can’t even remember the name of five seconds after they’ve told me (and don’t even get me started on the hours afterward I’ll spend running over the possible names that I could’ve heard trying hopelessly to hit the right tag in my brain all the while kicking myself for being too self-absorbed to remember a simple name) yeah, I’m not sure where all that came from cause it was NOT in my mental notes (a snapshot into my mind).
Anyway.
What I was starting to say is, I’m proud, and I hope you’re proud too of what Christ has accomplished in you, his beautiful masterpeice, Caralyn, a young woman greatly beloved (#throwbacktodaniel #iknowbutijusthadto)
It’s not hard to tell (or maybe you’re just a good actor 😉 ) this is big for you and at first I was like ‘well that’s not so big,’ and not that I was thinking that in like a discrediting way but I couldn’t (and I’m sure still don’t) completely grasp what a step it was for you to share that photo with us, but at the same time (and maybe this is where that tidbit at the beginning came from) it got me thinking about all the reminders I’ve buried over the years that don’t even seem nearly so big as this but that I wouldn’t want to dig up for a thousand bucks a pop. (Maybe a million–MAYBE 😉 ) I guess it just impressed on me a bigger sense of what kind of courage it took for you to go through with that. Bravo (:
(I actually feel like this comment turned out a lot lamer than I was planning but, WHATEVER) (curse you, over-introspection) I don’t think I can put it any better than I already did to say, I’m proud, and I’m pretty darn lucky to have stumbled on your story because my golly gosh it’s been so encouraging to follow along.
Anyway, I’ll stop rambling now 😉
Happy Sunday!
Hey Carson! Oh my gosh this comment really made me smile. First of all, it was totally NOT lame at allll! It was really thoughtful and heartfelt and I so appreciate it. And golly gosh (☺️) am I grateful that our paths crossed too! Because you just continue to enrich my life, so thank you for that my friend. Have a wonderful rest of your Sunday! Hugs and love xox
God Bless you! 🙂
Aw thank you so much! God is good. Hugs and love xox
May you continue to feel God’s love surround you each and everyday. <3 <3 <3
Thank You so much. God is good and I definitely feel His mercy and grace and love in my life. So glad you stopped by! Hugs and love xox
while listening to your heartfelt story of transformation I also saw myself. although we are vastly different physically, age, gender, and issues of our past, the spirit of our transformations has common ground. I thank you for your honestly, and openness.
bless you my friend
Thank you so much for this reflection, Jim. I appreciate you watching and I’m glad it resonated with you. Sending big hugs xox
A beautiful post, by a beautiful person (inside and out!) <3
Aw thank you so much Nicole. What a kind thing to say:) thanks for watching! Hugs and love xox
<3 🙂
Hi Caralyn….going for the Gold medal again in bravery (you remember what I said you first got it for, right? 😉 And yet, it is with great hope and prayer that I believe that the sharing of this will allow that darkness to be brought into the Light, to be surrendered. There’s an expression that I think came from AA that you are only as sick as your secrets. YOU have been hauling out those secrets, bringing them to the surface, hewing them out of the ossified fears and torments of the past, throwing them out into the light where they can be turned over to God. He has granted you the knowledge, the courage, the wisdom of when and how to do this, and will help you through this.
Keep going daughter of the Most High 😀
Hahha than you Jeff. That’s kind of you to say. Yes, I know and love that saying well. It’s so true. When we let people in, it no longer has power over us. Thanks for your encouragement. God is good. Hugs and love xox
wow this is beautiful!! Thank you for liking my blogg, as I have just started. It brought me to your bogg..god really works in mysterious ways, just when you liked my blogg I was actually having lunch at a hospital. And I came across a older woman who was anorexia and I was asking God how does a person become like this and how does it go this far.. Its so amaizing, as I went on your blogg I got all the answers and it has helped me to understand and have abit knowledge. Because of your blogg I now have some understanding, and now I can go and pray for people out there who is struggling!! Your blogg is so inspirational, and so uplifting!! It is so amazing to see how the Lord has touched your heart and you are a living proof that with God there is healing and revival.. I pray that God may use you more and more, and as you are writing this blogg it may bring light to all those who are broken.. May you be a light to the world as the word says we are a light to the world..
Thank you so much, wow what incredible timing! God is good:) thank you for the prayers I really appreciate it. Hugs and love xox
I cannot imagine what courage you had to summon to publish this post. You would be impressed by the latest post of someone else with a similar, but possibly far less extreme ED history: kelseymunger.com.
Strangely I followed her blog because of the strong, commonsense Christian spirit of her writing and had not realised her past ED history until reading this.
Tony.
Thank you so much Anthony, I really appreciate your encouragement. I’ll definitely check out that blog. Thanks for passing it along! Hugs and love xox
I should point out, in case you check her blog, I describe her writing as ‘commonsense Christian’ because she rejects the extreme ‘dangling you over the pit’ hellfire and guilt inducing preaching she was subjected to as a teenager and is not a churchgoer. Nevertheless she has come through it with, I think unknowingly, a sense of balance which Jesus would love.
Thanks Anthony. I look forward to checking it out. Thanns again for passing it along
Its hard to look back at ourselves when in the past we feel the breaks. I hate old pix of me because I was at least 2x if not more, of my size now. All my friends love sharing old pix of them. I don’t. I usually share old pix of places I’ve been but not of me. I totally confide with your feelings of your old shot. I feel the same gratefulness that you do about where I’ve come from that. You are beautiful now and have made your presence into a beautiful present and that will keep on carrying you to a beautiful future. Biggest love and hugs!! xoxoxoxoxo
Thank you so much Migueltio:) yeah I am definitely super grateful to not be in that place any longer. Thank you for your beautiful encouragement and support. You’re a good friend and I’m grateful for you:) massive hugs to you xox
xoxo to you too!
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I am so happy for you & that just like me, are happy to be alive. You have come so far and inspire so many. Being genuine is something that you’re good at ! <3
Thank you so much:) that’s so kind of you say. Hope your week is off to a great start! Hugs and love xox
Congratulations on your recovery.
Thank you so much friend. Sending big hugs xox
So proud of you. Remember, you may not be where you want to be, but you aren’t where you used to be.
Hey Daphne! Thanks for this beautiful reminder. I needed to hear that:) Hugs and love xox
Thanks for sharing such a vulnerable moment with us all.
Thanks Justin. I appreciate your encouragement. Hugs and love xox
You are an amazing woman. Love this post. Thanks for sharing 💕💕💕
Thank you so much Ali. I really appreciate your encouraging and kind words. Hugs and love xox
You have inspired me to be more vulnerable about my own life and past. Thank you.
Thank you so much Terri:) so glad it resonated with you. Hugs and love xox
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and God saw your true beauty even before He and healed you lead you to where you are today
You are a true light to illuminate the darkness of disbelief and give hope to those who are still struggling