What’s in a Name?

What’s in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet…”

I know. I know. Now a days good ol’ Bill’s iambic pentameter is about as relevant as a MySpace profile in 2016.

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OK OK, maybe an overstatement. After all, one of my favorite roles I ever portrayed was Lady Macbeth…

But I’ve gotta be honest…my boy, Leo DiCaprio in Romeo + Juliet was the best thing that ever happened to Shakespeare…

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*swoon*

But I digress.

Names.

What’s in a name?

I know I’ve recently come out with my name, but what about BeautyBeyondBones?

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I think a common misconception is that it is referring to my recovery from anorexia. From literally transforming from a skeletal frame to a healthy and vibrant young lady.

Which is true.

During the depths of my sickness, my skeletal frame was the physical manifestation of my interior brokenness. When I would look in the mirror, all I would see was the projection of my guilt, shame and inability to love myself. And I carried that into much of my early stages of recovery.

And I’m going to be honest with you. This aspect of my recovery – the mirror – has been one of the most difficult to shake. It has been an area where I can still get tripped up with – being so deeply disappointed in the reflection staring back at me – seeing only the pain I’ve caused my loved ones and deep shame I carry with me.

It wasn’t until I realized that my beauty comes from Christ living in my heart, that I truly began to heal. My physical body – my flesh, muscles, and bones – they’re beautiful, because they were “knit together in my mother’s womb” by the Lord. His handiwork.

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But it goes beyond that.

I want to just pause here for a second, because when I was in my disease, my mother used to tell me that. And even though she was 100% right on the money, I didn’t want to hear it. I didn’t want to think about being a child of God. I wanted nothing to do with it. I just wanted to be alone with ED, self-destructing. Maybe you can relate.

Here’s something that I could have related to a bit more.

There’s a story in Ezekiel 37 that literally sums up my recovery. And it sums up Beauty Beyond Bones. I seriously almost fell out of my chair when I read it. Allow me to paraphrase:

God leads Ezekiel out into the desert where he is surrounded by tons of dead, dry, bones. Ezekiel asks God, “Can these dry bones live?” And the Lord breathed into the bones and they came to life. They came together, bone to bone, flesh appeared, and skin covered them. His “breath entered them, they came to life and stood up on their feet – a vast army.”  … God said, (13-14) “I will breathe my Spirit into you and you will live.”

I was that pile of dead, dry bones – both literally and figuratively. My hope was dried up, my body was dried up. I was lifeless: a shell of a human, without passion, without purpose, without hair, and without the belief that I could go on. I was a bunch of dead bones.

But Jesus breathed life into me. Into my dead bones, and brought them to life. He restored me. Restored my body, my spirit, my mind. He took the old, dead me, and gave me new life. He made me a new creation. 

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Believing that my beauty is beyond bones has been a long and arduous journey. And if I’m really honest, I’m still on it. But every day, I’m getting closer. Every day, Jesus works a little more and more on my heart.

And I celebrate the fact that I am no longer that pile of dead, dry, bones. God has breathed life into me, and that, friends, is the beauty beyond bones.

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beautybeyondbones

BBB: Because we're all recovering from something. // For speaking/business inquiries: beautybeyondbones@yahoo.com

294 thoughts on “What’s in a Name?

  1. Your words made me feel kinda funny. I’m actually touched and I believe I am kinda going through something.. probably not the same extent or matter as you but I can relate because I’m going through something of a disorder myself. I knew it’d catch up to me sooner or later and got a relapse. I’m in the hospital trying to word my way out of this whole situation I’m in. It’s kind of funny, you think maybe you should live like you’re about to die but force yourself to believe that there’s no measure in time so you can stay consistent and have faith until the end. And maybe in some alternate universe, if you tried hard enough you could make a difference in your life. Though, I’m hardly dying.. maybe of laughter because not all is as it seems. I finally see that I am not my mind. My mind is not me. I went through my problems believing that the illness portrayed a certain image of me. That there was a stigma and I knew I would have to live with it in secret. You on the other hand embraced it and found a way to reverse the roles and actually helped others in their recovery. Only the holiest names can help me embrace this thing. Thank you for your nurturing words. Your admirer, Nam.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Nam, thank you so much for sharing your story and for your kind words. I’m so sorry to hear that you’re in the hospital going through something. Know that I am praying for you full healing. You’re so right, you are not your illness. And i believe in you:) sending big hugs xox

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Good afternoon Ana,
    I’ve been struggling with my dislike for mirrors and scales for a long time. I pray that one day God will heal my heart and that I can see myself like you through Jesus’s eyes.
    Two songs that I thought of when reading your message here:
    Dry Bones come Alive by Lauren Daigle
    Through Your Eyes by Britt Nicole
    God Bless you and thank you for being here.

    Like

  3. There is a lot in a name. Most native cultures believe that your name is your essence, a key to who you are and what you are here to do. Knowing someone’s name can tell you a lot about the person, and saying someone’s name out loud with consciousness can invoke the qualities of the bearer’s name.

    Like

  4. I think you are a beautiful soul .
    I found your post so very inspiring and transparent:)
    Thank you !
    Also thanx a ton for liking my posts on a consistent basis .
    I’m a very new blogger , and every like is appreciated !
    Much love from India ❤️️

    Like

  5. This is BEAUTIFUL! Your testimony is one of beauty! I am so glad that you know that your value is more than skin deep. We read that Ezekeil passage at church last week. How amazing is it that His breath alone will bring life to any dead situation that has been written off. He is our life and our hope💜

    Like

  6. Love this! When I first visited your blog, I had instantly thought of this song (“Come Alive-Dry Bones) based on the scripture Ezek.37. I meant to share it with back then, so I was reminded of it tonight after reading this post. If you haven’t heard it, I think you will LOVE it..it has meant a lot to me during my battle with this auto-immune disease. It is sung by Laura Daigle, an award-winning artist who actually was on American Idol, for a time, before being cut. I love her heart and her music; it always brings me to tears. Sidenote: I even had one of her songs in my daughter’s wedding .:) Oh, and she was just on the ACM Awards (tonight) singing with Reba. Here’s the link:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7XAeyFagceQ Blessings!

    Like

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