Like a Woman Scorned…

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

This post tonight, is being served with a side of indignation.

Because I am angry.

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I hesitate to post this, because, well…you’ll see. But I need to vent.

You see, I’ve recently started reaching out to various potential sponsors for my blog. Exciting times, I know.

So I contacted an eating disorder treatment center this afternoon. Wrote them a beautiful letter, inviting them to check out my blog.

And this woman sends me back a one-liner: “Certainly promotes being skinny!”

Exclamation point.

Certainly promotes being skinny…exclamation point.

Do you hear that? It’s the sound of the are-you-freaking-kidding-me explosion of outrage detonating inside my soul.

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But more than outraged, I was just hurt.

First of all…the fact that a mental health professional wrote such a derogatory word to a former anorexic is just the epitome of insensitive.

But this blog is an extension of my soul. Literally. I have poured out everything I have – my spirit, my weaknesses, failings, struggles, triumphs, fears — everything — in the hopes that even one person would read my words and feel comforted that they’re not alone. Find hope. Encouragement. And for someone to merely reduce it to something as superficial as being about promoting “being skinny” — it was just an ice cold slap in the face.

During my anorexia, I nearly died in the quest for “skinniness.” I starved myself down to 78 pounds, and even then, I didn’t believe that I was “skinny” enough. The scale and my reflection tormented my spirit and led me to destroy relationships, miss my high school graduation, delay college, become infertile, plague my self-worth and seriously damage my relationship with God. Not to mention becoming osteopenic as an 18-year-old girl, flirting with death.

Skinny almost killed me. And I’ll be damned if I ever do anything remotely close to promoting it.

Lastly, I don’t mean to be all “over-sensitive.” I mean, I can hear my father reading this right now, going, “Just let it go…” (In the most loving way possible, of course.)

But I took this very personally. I mean, it goes without saying that my image is all over this blog. And, okay…maybe too much, I’ll admit.

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But, I have been very open with the fact that I have Ulcerative Colitis. And the way I have stayed in remission for the last six years is through a radical, therapeutic diet, called the Specific Carbohydrate Diet. (SCD) The Seattle Children’s Hospital actually just published a study a few weeks ago, proving that it cured 80% of the participants with Crohn’s/Colitis.

But it’s how I have to eat, and I have done a damn good job, if I do say so myself, because it is hard. But it is what I have to do to stay in remission. I was on bed rest for eleven months with an Ulcerative Colitis flare in 2011 that nearly took my life, and the SCD saved me – (and my intestines from being removed). In fact, I even published a cookbook with my SCD recipes.

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UC Flare ’11

BUT – all that being said, I am very well aware that this therapeutic way of eating keeps me slim. But I work hard to maintain a healthy weight, and I do. And I do not appreciate getting slapped with the term “skinny” from this mental health professional who apparently only qualifies women as “recovered” if they are on the high end of normal.

I’m sorry, would you like me to send you my vitals and recent blood work?

I just. I have no words.

And I’m sorry if this sounds like an eye-roll-worthy rant fest from a thin girl complaining for getting called “skinny.” Believe me, I know that there are far more pressing issues in the world.

So. To placate this insular inferno…here are six things this blog does promote.

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1) Loving God, because without Him, we can do nothing.

2) Loving other people, because everyone is on a journey, and could use a friend along the way.

3) Claiming the truth that you are loved by the Creator, and deserve to live in that abundant joy each and every day.

4) Accept and embrace our short comings and weaknesses, because they do not define us, and have been forgiven and redeemed through Christ.

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5) Recognizing that I have worth and value because Christ died for me, and nothing in my past – even an eating disorder – can negate that fact.

6) Loving Christ in you…therefore, loving yourself.


So there you go. If you’ll notice, “being skinny” is not on the list of things I promote.

Never has been. Never will be.

Hope that clears things up…

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**** On that note…If you or your business would like to sponsor/advertise on BBB, let’s talk! —> beautybeyondbones@yahoo.com 😉

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546 thoughts on “Like a Woman Scorned…

  1. Amen…As a guy reading this, this so-called “professional” wasn’t being even decent in the reply. I mean, c’mon, that reply was insensitive.

  2. Wow, I can’t believe that woman. Someone needs to work in a different sector of this the kind of stuff coming out of her mouth. Super disappointing, but I love that you mentioned all the things your blog DOES promote. You know who you are and what your blog is about. You know your values and what you want to share with the world, so try not to be discouraged by this one person. You will find sponsors and they will align with your blog and what it DOES promote. ❤️😁

  3. Dear Beauty,

    Welcome to the reality of those that treat others in the mental health system. this is what we and many others like have to deal with daily. Sadly, we have all been programmed to believe that mental health professionals are somehow, in some regards, smarter and better people. Nope. The public mental health system – Welcome to it, my friend. It only gets worse – You would be surprised some of the s**t those stuck in the mental system have to deal with.

    Including people like that.

    Keep rockin it.
    M
    EK
    M

      1. Oh, no need to apologize for other people’s mistakes. You didn’t do anything wrong.

        Yep, the system. Stay lovely!

        M and the gang

  4. Your story is truely an inspirational one and I thank you so much for sharing. My oldest daughter works as a missionary and works with a group called Beauty Arise that promotes the idea for girls to find their worth and beauty in the eyes of Christ. My daughter works with models and other young girls and promotes that they are important and that God loves them. Keep sharing as I know your words reach so many who if not dealing with this issue has a loved one or a friend that does.

  5. Never once have I thought that reading your posts dear one! I’m so sorry she wrote that. It is unbelievable, and I hope she apologizes. Our crosses are not for the purpose of self-promotion. If we had it to do Over we would not want our illnesses! God is our judge and comforter!

  6. I’m sorry I can’t sponsor you. No money. 🙂

    It’s tough in the world right now because there’s thing called fat acceptance. We need to knock all this stuff off. Everyone should just know they are a precious child of God, thick or thin. Just know it, deep in your spirit. The problem with these cultural narratives is that they try to apply a one size fits all solution to diverse people. So absolutely, fat acceptance is wonderful, until you have type two diabetes and trouble getting up the stairs. Being thin is awesome too, unless you’re recovering from pneumonia or walking through chemo or something. It’s the health beneath the surface that we need to think about,the well being of the one involved. Fat acceptance is much like the flip side of mandatory thinness that we’ve seen the media. They’re all designed to make us place our own worth and value in something external and flimsy. We need to start believing what God says about us,and He says we are to die for.

    I always find it kind of interesting that Jesus Himself is an ordinary man, not particularly handsome, having no real charisma. Now of course He’s not ordinary at all, He’s extraordinary, but physically the bible makes a point of letting us know His specialness had nothing to do with his outward appearance.

    1. haha thanks friend. But seriously, thank you for your encouragement. You’re right – we need to grasp onto what He says about us, because it is the truth, and it was enough to die for. thanks for your support! big hugs xox

  7. Uhh…..What?

    Seriously. Just what? Did she even take the time to read your blog? Or did she just scroll through the text and look at your pictures? Because…What???

    I don’t get it. 🙁

  8. I sometimes why certain people are in the jobs they are. It’s pretty clear this person has no business working in any type of mental health healing position. You have a wonderful blog, and I know all your readers agree. Keep writing and inspiring. xo

  9. Psst… don’t tell anyone but along with giving a courageous witness, you’re teaching me to write as well! God bless!

  10. Oh goodness… One comment that rattles me is ‘I wish I had that problem!’ As in, I explain I have a hormone disorder and it keeps me thin and they literally say they wish they had that problem… I never really know what to say to that.

    I don’t promote thinness, either. Health is what we’re after. Physical, emotional, spiritual… And for what it’s worth, I’ve never gotten a message of ‘think thin’ on your blog.

    It’s sort of scary to think how that professional might be damaging those in recovery…

    1. Thanks for this, Britt. Oh gosh, that is definitely a hurtful remark to receive. I’m so sorry to hear that!! You’re right – health is multifaceted and thank you for being you and sharing your story to help others! big hugs xox

  11. How insensitive for that comment to be made!!!!. Just for the record, you are a survivor, and person of exceptional talent and a knockout in looks. So give a thumbs down to that foolish person and move on in the knowledge you have more too you than that person does. 🙂

  12. Wow, what kind of reply is that?! Totally unprofessional for that to come from a business! Kudos to you for reaching out to sponsors though, that is something I really want to get into but just haven’t had the time to get started. Hopefully you find other people to be more kind as you continue your search.

      1. It would make sense. Why so dismissive. They might just not expect a blog that speaks of God so openly and that would cloud their judgement on the rest of their response.
        Some people are very far from God.

  13. I think that in order to divulge, it is necessary to speak with the greatest number of people, and be prepared for refusals. Negative contacts are part of the plan and positives as well. Mood and good luck!

  14. Ugh, how sucky… But that one liner response tells you all the unfortunate truth you need to know about that particular person. They don’t get it. They don’t GET IT. They don’t understand the disease, the recovery efforts, the depth, not even the vocabulary. My mom used to tell me, “Consider the source.” Try not to let someone so obviously misinformed and uncouth impact your feelings so strongly. Your path is well beyond her current understanding. You are impacting lives in a positive, Christ-filled way every day, just on your blog! It most certainly is hard to let these things go, but you’re amazing and deserve to allow yourself to dismiss that pain. Hugs your way!

    1. Thanks friend. I really appreciate the support and hugs 🙂 I love your mom’s advice – she sounds like a smart woman. Definitely taking that to heart. Thanks again for your wonderfully kind words. means the world. big hugs xox

  15. This definitely resonates with me! I was born 3 months early and have always been petite. I hate when people say things like ‘you should really eat more/eat a burger,’ or think I’m unhealthy (even anorexic once!) because I also work hard to maintain a healthy weight. Yes, I’m smaller than many other people, but that doesn’t mean I’m unhealthy. I’m healthy in my own standards. It’s bums me out and is really unfair when people assume things about our weight/size, especially when they don’t know our story. As cliche as ‘don’t judge a book by its cover’ is, it’s always true.

    As always, I love reading your blogs! I hope you’re having a relaxing evening.

    1. Hi friend, thank you so much for sharing your story. I’m sorry you can relate. Yeah – health comes in all shapes and sizes, and at the end of the day, it’s what’s on the inside that counts! Thanks for stopping by and for your encouragement! hugs xox

    2. I can totally relate to this! I’ve been called skinny all my life and people will never understand how insulting that can be. I don’t think it’s fair that it’s totally wrong to call someone “fat” or “overweight” but it’s okay to tell someone they need to go eat something. After having a baby back in February I was able to keep some of the weight that I had gained during my pregnancy and I finally started becoming comfortable in my skin but now as that weight slowly falls off, so is my confidence. I guess at some point we just have to move and embrace the way that God made us!

      1. Thanks for sharing that Tausha, I’m sorry you can relate so personally. Yes! Let’s love the way God made us!! 🙂 thanks for stopping by! big hugs xo

  16. I’ll be honest here – reading this made me tear up a bit. It’s unfathomable to me that any health care practitioner in any discipline could speak to you in that manner. So far beyond rude. I see you and your website as a very positive inspiration for others affected with what you’ve been through. I believe you are a woman of great strength and courage – people such as you spoke to and was so rude to you, will never get in your way. Keep up your good works my friend, and by the way, you look fabulously healthy to me. Be well!! ❤️

    1. awww, thank you John. I’m so glad this hit home with you! I can’t tell you how much your words of encouragement mean tonight. you’re a great friend. big big hugs xox

    1. Thanks so much Wayne, I appreciate it so much. You’re right — Gotta pray for her. Just gotta say, you were one of the first to believe in me — way back when I did your podcast, and you gave me so much encouragement and confidence to really get out there and tell my story, so thank you with all my heart 🙂 big hugs xo

  17. Oh my goodness, I don’t even know where to begin. Exactly where on your blog does it “Certainly promotes being skinny!”? I mean, I’ve only been reading your blog since January this year but I am confused as to where I find the “promoting skinny” section. I’d be a little more than offended and really want an expansion of “Certainly promotes being skinny!” and where exactly that message is being conveyed. *deep breath* ok, thoughts a little calmer, there’s your sign that this “organization” is not a sponsor you want to have. If that is the sensitivity, compassion, and attention they possess then I feel for the people they are suppose to be helping.

    1. Thanks Margaret. Yeah, definitely nowhere on this blog! :Thanks so much for your kind words and encouragement. I really appreciate your support. means a lot. hope you’re having a great night! big hugs xo

      1. You’re welcome, and I sorry if I came off as judgmental of that “professionals” comment but things that make utterly no sense to me, like their comment rubs me entirely the wrong way. I’ll pray that that God reveals to them the magnitude of a comment like that, for you to have a sponsor He wants you to have, and for me to not let things like that rub me the wrong way. Pray your night is good as well xoxo

  18. Hey Caralyn. I would say it is obvious that person does not read your blog. If she did, she would see God’s Love, love God, Christ, Christ’s love, love Christ, love others, Christ, love yourself because Christ loved each of us enough to die for us, written all through each blog.
    One other thing, perhaps two, I would pick out from her hastily sent, thoughtless note, she is certainly not a professional, and not a lady, responding that way.

    To quote you, (using a word that my Dad also used many years):
    Anywho, don’t pay attention to her, keep on your with your tremendous ministry, blog, teaching sessions, encouragements, because you are a blessing, and you are blessing many.

    God Bless you, Caralyn,
    💐 Luv and Hugs,

    George

    1. Thanks George, I really appreciate your kind words. Wow I am seriously so touched. What did I do to deserve a friend like you!? Thanks for having my back. Hugs and love xox

  19. So sad. Like one of the commenters above, I wonder if your open embrace of not just “faith” but Jesus himself is the actual problem here. He gets less socially acceptable every year, it seems. Bless you for your good work.

  20. Wow. Disturbing and sad on a number of levels. Hope you’re okay? You know we don’t think that of you! That person needs our prayers.
    And I did not know that about your diet. Thank you for sharing. All of it. ❤
    God bless.

      1. Exactly. That person may be going through things we can’t imagine, hopefully they’re not hurting too many others in the process, though!
        And you are most welcome! 💐

  21. Great post! You share so many honest, encouraging, beautiful things on your blog. As someone who has suffered from ulcerative colitis, I have been accused of being too skinny. People definitely do not think before they speak sometimes. Please keep sharing your story!! You are a blessing!

  22. I have to say that I am completely embarrassed for that individual. All I can say is that I HOPE and pray that it was an office assistant and not an actual “professional”. It would help me sleep better knowing that anyway. I cant stand for people to take jabs at someone in such a way when they dont think about what their words could mean in the other person’s mind. I just want to let you know that I absolutely love what you have done with your blog. I aspire to have the nerve to share my demons as you do. I recently found you when you liked one of my posts and I am so happy that you did! I myself have recently come to light on my eating disorder which is on the other side of the spectrum from yours but regardless of that you give me strength to tell my story!

    1. Thank you so much. Yeah it was a pretty bone head remark. Thank you from the. Bottom of my heart for your kind words about my blog. That seriously means so much. I’m really glad our paths crossed!! Rock on warrior!!! Know I am cheering you on 🙂 Big hugs xox

  23. I am truly sorry that you had to go through that. But you are a daughter of the King. You are beautiful, strong, courageous, and an inspiration to many. I understand the hurt. I too have poured out my vulnerable heart sharing the hard times and victories in my tiny little blog about overcoming depression and alcohol abuse. I was searching Scripture and this came to me for you, I hope it will encourage your heart like it did mine. 1 Peter 3:13-22 (ESV) “Now who is there to harm you if you are zealous for what is good? But even if you should suffer for righteousness’ sake, you will be blessed. Have no fear of them, nor be troubled, but in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect, having a good conscience, so that, when you are slandered, those who revile your good behavior in Christ may be put to shame…” and this came to me as well…Ephesians 4:26 (NIV) “In your anger do not sin. Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry…” The joy of the Lord is your strength, amen? God bless you. I am cheering you on and standing in the gap. The Lord is going to bring the right sponsors to you. I just know it. ♥

    1. Thanks Debbie. Wow this is. Beautiful. Thank you so much. And my goodness what a powerful verse. Thanks for sharing that. And thank you for sharing your story too. You let strength is inspiring and I know God is smiling on you:) Hugs and love xox

  24. Wow. Of all the things I think when I read your blog, it being about promoting being “skinny” is not one of them. I can understand how you feel, and I think: consider the source. In today’s world a lot of people who are “helping”? really are not. They are promoting their own agenda about whatever the issue is. You present this particular material in a different way and that always raises at least some fur. While I am not “Christian” I appreciate the basic tenet of LOVE and walking in faith. You put this forth understandably, consistently, and well, and also create in the process a really good description of what happens when you MUST go deep enough to discover those things. Deep breath. It’s just one more experience, more information. Peace out!

      1. We strive daily! ( With some near misses of course.) I believe if we all do what we CAN we can see miracles. xxxxxxx

      1. I can’t even fathom what would have possessed someone to say such a horrible thing. ☹️

  25. Sounds like a clueless impersonal “professional” who doesn’t care a lick about who you are or who you are reaching. Caralyn (did I spell that right?), you are a beautiful writer! You write of God’s grace in your life and I consistently see more of HIM than you. Keep writing. I know you won’t stop, but I just had to say it. 🙂

    1. Thanks so much Sierra. Gosh you are so kind. And yes!! You spelled it right! *smiles* 😁 Your comment absolutely lifted my spirits. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Hugs and love xox

  26. I know it’s not quite on the same level, but as someone who is desperate enough for a job to work retail, who literally just applied to Kohl’s not even an hour ago, and got a rejection letter not even 10 minutes after applying… Ugh… It’s so frustrating.

      1. Thank you! That’s what people keep telling me. The waiting is hard though, y’know? Anyway, I love your blog! I’m always excited when I see you have a new post! 😊

  27. I can’t believe someone would say that! I’m outraged for you. I am so inspired through your blog and the thought that you promoted skinny has never ever crossed my mind.

  28. Best friend’s grandson has had colitis all through his teens and early 20s and I know how the diet can keep one on the thin side. Recently the doctors here in Kitchener performed a new experimental treatment which seems to have worked. He has gained about 20 pounds in the last two months and feels healthy. (he may be cured);
    People often comment without knowing all the background facts. Shame on that “professional”. Don’t let her/him bother you. You have, as my wife says in one of her poems, “the eyes to see and the words to tell the truths that are most true.” Keep up the good work.

    1. Oh gosh I’m so sorry to hear that he also knows the struggle, but I’m so glad that his treatment is working! That’s terrific! And what true words – sounds like an awesome poem. Thanks for sharing. Hugs and love xox

  29. That woman obviously has some serious issues that she needs to have addressed!!! Your blog has never been anything about being skinny. Don’t let her get to you, and I know that’s easier said than done. You just keep being your beautiful you and you keep looking to Christ. He said that He gives believers everything we need that pertains to life and godliness, so you just keep your eyes on Him! I love your blog and I love what you stand for!!

  30. Yeah I will be very angry to if I was in your shoes from what you say you been through. I had few things I been through some dark, cruel, and hurt feelings of my speech impediment that I gotten a lot better with from being a kid and haven’t had any problems with people, also with “MOCKING” that I hated the most of, of being in school, since I was in school.
    So I can understand your anger from those words.

      1. I’m over my stuff now, but if I ever get mock by someone plushly by a man, they going to get one hell of punch from mocking me, but I will never hit a woman but I might but my hand into a fist and slam it down or hit something with the button my fist on something real hard but not the woman.

  31. Caralyn, Oh the words that are currently trying to escape my lips are NSFW. Not one of them. I want to encourage you to reach out to the management of the company and share this email response with them. This is unprofessional, inappropriate, and dismissive. I would go further and say dangerous. Actually I’m going to say it, it’s dangerous. Gah! This really makes me angry. I would like for this to be a “Let it Go” moment. *cue Idina” but it’s not. Oh bleeeeeeeeeeeeeep.
    And yes I am still a good Catholic girl who’s really pissed.

    1. Haha oh my gosh this made me laugh. Thank you so much Teri. Yeah it was definitely not a very sensitive remark to say the last. Cue idina…haha you’re funny 🙂 thanks for brightening my spirits! Hugs and love xox

  32. You are a beautiful woman inside and out! Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. It’s ok to be angry when people are mean and insensitive. Just tell them how it is so they know and move on. People think just because you’re Christian they can walk all over you… I have a lot more to say about that so watch this space. You stay gorgeous! xxx

  33. You are a beautiful young woman. You are thin, but knowing what you went through explains that. It is outrageous that a professional would slap you verbally across your smiling face. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I hope you feel better for having written it.

  34. Amen! And praise the Lord for how well you are now. And I don’t think you’re skinny, for whatever that’s worth. Hopefully you get over the other problem, I pray that will be the case. Great to hear of your diet. My wife is into that kind of thing, and I more or less follow. 🙂

  35. Don’t shut down the light of your greatness because someone is too blinded to see it, doing so will rob this generation of your awesomeness. I believe in your work.

  36. Hi Carolyn, I just read your latest blog post and am very upset about how some people responded. I’m sorry for what you’ve been through. I know it wasn’t easy and I just wish more people could take some times and just try to understand your struggles, your path to recovery, and your unwavering faith in Christ Jesus. You are strong Carolyn; no amount of negativity can bring you down. Love you Sister. I pray that God would continue use you in so many ways to inspire others and to encourage others to hold on even when life gets tough. You are the warrior for Christ. I am so proud of you!! ❤️❤️👍😊

    1. Oh my gosh I am so touched by your kind and generous worlds. Thank you friend. Your prayers and support mean the absolute world. Sending so much love and hugs xox

  37. I am grateful for the list of things you do promote, all TRUE and all GOOD. I wonder if the professional’s response was more about your faith which perhaps is offensive to their world view.

  38. Hey BBB, you know what they say. When one door closes, a wave of them open up. I’ve learned that sometimes the circles we feel as though we’ll be useful, is not even the place where God wants us. So many doors are going to open for you, until you won’t even remember the one that closed. Thanks for venting, we all need to do that from time to time and you have so many supporters that don’t mind listening, including me. Keep pushing mama…

    1. Hi Roshonda, thank you so much for this encouragement. You are amazing, you know it? 🙂 yes, gotta look for the other doors God will open 🙂 Hugs and love xox

  39. Oh Caralyn dearest, the disillusioned, tortured souls that work in the system… We pray for them as well, because they themselves are attacked more often than we know and they don’t need any more angry thoughts if they are to help anyone. Let us remember that God uses everyone for good. Thank you so much for venting here, your blog is always perfect as Heaven knows are You at any moment and WILL find your way, and those not fortunate enough to have such supportive family and friends, could use our silent kindness. Your indignation is fully understood and embraced, do listen to this amazing father of yours, and know that many of us shield you against jealousy and envy with our hearts and guardian angels
    (telling mine to tell yours to give you the most replenishing, healing embrace tonight)
    💜🙏 Leon

    1. Hi Leon, wow thank you for this beautiful encouragement. Yes let’s pray for sure. And you’re right- everything for good. That’s such a healing thought. I feel that kind hug, and I’m so grateful it. And for you:) thank you friend. Hugs and love xox

  40. I am sending you so much love and Light. <3 Forgiveness is one of the greatest things that helped me heal an eating disorder, and to realize – without a shadow of a doubt – that God loves me as God's child. Just was called to share that with you. Happy to chat further if you ever want to do that. My email is weloveyou@forgivingconnects.com.

    Thank you for the service and courage you bring with this blog to your readers, and many blessings,
    Debbie

    1. Thank you so much Debbie. What a kind thing to say. I so appreciate your encouragement. – loved as His child. What a beautiful thought. Sending so much love xox

  41. Whoever this person is she sounds super unprofessional. If she were she would know to be careful with what she says. Anything can be taken the wrong way.

  42. Because some one is being paid for their work does not make them a professional. For many and certainly for the one who gave that reply being paid only is an indication that they are for sale…. cheap. They are a professional health services prostitutes who do not have professional knowledge attitude or ethics. This person only insulted you. Big deal. Imagine the destruction they are bringing into the lives of their fragile wounded clients. That is something truly serious and a word to the society or organization that they are accountable to is definately in order. You go girl.

    1. Thank you so much for your support, Jack. You’re right – we all need to be mindful of the words that come out of our mouths because they really do have power. Thanks so much for this powerful food for thought. Hugs and love xox

  43. Don’t let the idiotas and jerks and small minded subhumans and a-holes get to you. You know who you are and that is the most important fact. That woman is a horror reflected showing you how broken medicine has become because it and those in it have lost heart. Not all medical professionals granted but a hell of a lot. When the time is right the perfect opportunities will present themselves. Worry not. Rage not. God’s got this!! 💕🌸💕

  44. I’ll never understand why some people feel like it would just kill them to be nice, or at the very least, show the same respect to others that they show them. That woman doesn’t sound like she’s very good at her job. I haven’t been following you for very long but I never once got the impression that you were promoting being skinny. I picked up that you were a woman that loves God and is just trying to find her way and that’s what drew me to your blog. Keep on keeping on because I certainly enjoy reading what you have to say. God bless!

    1. Hi again friend!! 🙂 Thank you for this beautiful encouragement. I am seriously so touched. Yes! God is good, and life is weird, and we’re all in this together 🙂 hahaha thanks for being such a beautiful light! hugs xo

  45. Obviously, this person didn’t even look at your blog or take the time to see past the photos, which, by the way look “normal” to me. You don’t want to be part of that company if that’s the sort of snap judgments they make, though I feel sorry for their patients. Hopefully their patients are getting better treatment than a single sentence and a kick out the door. People will ALWAYS judge. I’ve never been anorexic and won’t even pretend to slightly know what you’ve been through. But I’ve been called anorexic all of my life by people because of my weight, so I understand the “skinny judgement”. It’s a real thing. You’re doing a wonderful thing with this blog and any treatment center would be lucky to have you as an affiliate. Listen to your Dad…he’s a wise man. Sending you hugs 🙂

    1. Thanks so much Lisa, you’re really kind to say that. you’re right – gotta just keep on keeping on and brush it off. I’m sorry you’ve been called such a hurtful thing – it is just not right. Thanks for your kindness. Yes! Letting it go 🙂 big hugs back atcha! xox

  46. Darling. Her response had nothing to do with you personally. She doesn’t know you…the real you. Let it go, and move on. Neeeexxxxt? Much love. xxx

  47. I doubt she even took the time to visit your pages and read a few blog entries.

    Unfortunately, we’re surrounded by so-called professionals that are everything but. A paper does not make you a professional. Experience and genuine care and passion in what you do and responsibility do. And leaving aside presuming and assuming you know what a book is about by just looking at its cover. Even worse, forming and sharing an unfounded opinion with insufficient information or research.

    You did the right by sharing this experience and getting it out of your chest. You don’t want to bottle anger up.

    1. Thanks so much Maria. Yeah, not judging a book by its cover may be a cliche, but it sure is true! especially when you’re the “book!” haha thanks for your kindness. hugs xox

  48. Dear Carolyn, allow me a moment of your time. You have heard what some health care professionals think. For the record having a leather couch from a Sears catalog and a certificate that cost all but $15 to print off at the nearest Staples doesn’t make her an expert but rather an idiot. You’re readers know what you have sacaficed to write such a book with never ending chapters. Your blog is an indication of the victory that God received when he reached you. You’re smile is just a simple reminder to the general public of God’s love for his children like you. So if Jesus Christ be in you you have nothing to fear and nothing to fear worry about. Let peecedcution allow to know Jesus in his suffering. Think on six divine thoughts of God because I will tell you I have followed your blog for 2 years now and I enjoy your words. To some they may be just words but your readers of more than 25k know you and your heart and I think I speak for everyone hear when I say, your heart is beautiful. So be strong and of a good courage. You’re not a ashamed of the Gospel and God is proud of you. Your smile isn’t so bad either.😃

  49. Ssssssoooo one of my sayings in life is, “it always helps to know who has the problem”…is it me or the other person. It sets you free. If it is the other person, then I know to pray for that person. If it is me, then I know to to talk to God about me. It is obvious that she has an issue so ask God to help you know how to fervently, effectually pray for this person. Just think she is most likely dealing with others who have not come as far as you have and can do much damage. So defeat the enemy who wants to destroy your peace and joy by refusing to be angry and be a prayer warrior. Trust God all the way. He does not fail. 🙂

    1. Wow, that is such a great saying. That one is going on a post-it and going on the fridge! 🙂 haha seriously though – powerful stuff. Thanks for sharing that. yes, gotta pray for her and trust the goodness of God! big hugs xox

  50. Wow BBB this is incredibly powerful. As someone who had similar internal struggles but with bullyig I can sympathize your feelings to this reaction. This post is so powerful and I think what you are doing is so incredibly amazing! Please, never stop. 🙂

    1. Hi John, gosh what a kind comment. thank you so much. I’m sorry that you can so personally relate. Know that I’m grateful for you and I think you’re awesome 🙂 hehe hugs xox

  51. Oh my GOODNESS!! The very idea, the nerve even! Did she even care to consider what you might have been through? That’s too rude, and I am covering you in prayer, dear one. I shudder to think, though, of the lives she might be destroying with that attitude of hers! YOU, on the other hand, be blessed in knowing that you have so many people behind you. Shake that dust off your feet, girl! 😉

  52. Good Morning Sweetheart, I hope you are having a great day full of joy. Unfortunately, Some people judge wrongly and say faulty stuff without realizing it. What you are doing is amazing. I am sure god has a better plan for you and the right sponsors will join you soon. so never give up and have hope. I would love to hear your honest opinion about my blogs page. If you have any advice for me on a way to improve my blogs.. reply back to me. Best of luck!!

    1. Thanks so much Angelica, I really appreciate this beautiful encouragement. You are a light 🙂 Absolutely! Just keep putting yourself on the page! 🙂 hugs x

      1. I am so glad you found some encouragement in my words it is the least I can do. You are an angel. I will, thanks! hugs and much love 💕

  53. Carolyn…there’s no amount of ignorance or inconsideration that can prevent you from the self worth and pride you deserve to feel about your struggles. The degree of inflationary issues associated with your condition would keep the average person from getting out of bed each day. Know this, with or without any sponsorship, you are doing what you are called to do by presenting this situation here. Please don’t see this as anything beyond your capacity to respond. That’s more than you can ever realize 😍

  54. I am cheering you on! Don’t let that one person ruin your day or your desire to help others. You ARE helping others in a tremendous way. Thank you for always sharing your faith. It is foolishness to the world, but we have a better world that Jesus is preparing for us.

  55. Wow, she must not know how to read and only zipped through a few pictures of you.

    I love your blog and everything it stands for. May God bless you in this endeaver seeking sponsors.

  56. You are beautiful. That is all. You are incredibly beautiful and you happen to look beautiful also. (I think she was a bit jealous and wounded, do not let that wound you.) She needs Jesus. You keep rocking. Love you. XO

  57. Oh, Caralyn , I’m so sorry this happened to you. You are beautiful inside and out. God knows your beautiful heart. Continue to keep your eyes on Him and may it be well with your soul. He is your vindication. ❤️

  58. I don’t usually comment on anything, but I thought I need to add my voice to others today. I follow your blog, not because I am struggling with an eating disorder, but because of your devotion to God and your honesty. I have endured my own struggles, which I feel reticent to share since doing so would cast another in a negative light and it is my duty to point them towards the light, not shine it in their eyes. Reading your blog helps me to step back from myself and refocus on God. So even though, in my specific case, you are not helping a person with an eating disorder; your blog is helping me in my daily walk with God, and that is more precious than gold. Certainly more precious than one woman’s fearful response. Sending hugs from Africa with love xx

    1. Hi again Nadine! This is such a wonderful note of kindness. Thank you. You are absolutely spreading light. And for that I am so grateful. I’m so glad my blog hits home with you. Thank you friend. You have lifted my spirit tonight. Thank you xox

  59. Wow. I’ve never read much detail on what you went through until this post, and how shallow of them to respond in the manner they did. I was in tears reading this. The depth and the beauty God brought through this dark experience is amazing and I’m so happy to see you doing well. Ephesians 2:10 just came to mind. You are His handiwork! Don’t lose sight of that when people respond in the same way she did. Thank you for continuing to share your story. – Joe

    1. Thanks so much Joe. I really appreciate your kindness. Yeah, it’s been a bit of a journey, that’s for sure. I really am so touched by your affirming words. Hugs and love xox

  60. Caralyn, you are such an inspiration to me. I believe that the key to recovery from anything is in the spiritual solution, which takes a multitude of forms. There is huge money in treatment from these diseases, their focus is on marketing not promoting successful recovery, that they were not involved in. I have noticed a great many great writers posting on sites for treatment centers, but the focus is intake on the landing page. People can be quite abrasive and one never knows for sure what they are dealing with, so we can sometimes pray and feel sorry for them. I know you just want to help and perhaps get a return on your effort, there is something in God’s plan for you, I know it.

    1. Oh my gosh I am so touched by this. Thank you. You’re so right – God has been the spice of my recovery for sure! Thanks for your encouragement. Hugs and love xox

  61. That was a ridiculous response… but it might be God’s way of saying “That wasn’t the right sponsor for you, dear!” Inspired by your writing, by all these loving comments, and it’s a reminder to be confident in who I am like you are – who Christ says I am, who he has made me, and not who I might appear to others who aren’t looking closely enough to see the truth! Have a blessed night! 😄❤️

  62. You are beautiful in body and spirit. God gave you the thorn of anorexia and the thorn of colitis so that you might be brought closer to him through your suffering. Skinny is not bad. Thin is not bad. Anorexia is bad. People who are thin have longer life expectancies. People who are anorexic are different than people who are thin. By the way you do not look thin in an unhealthy way. You look thin in a “Wow, she is hot” way (Pardon my male observation). Frankly, I do not get what the: “Certainly promotes being skinny!” comment is about. I have NEVER seen anything in your blogs that promote “skinny”. I suspect that the comment came from a fat girl who doesn’t really know the difference between “thin” and “anorexic”. (BTW, I am a fat guy — I have inverse anorexia 🙂 — so I can make this comment!!!). You have the build of a model. Indeed, it is difficult to believe that anyone so physically attractive has had anorexia or colitis; because, you look so healthy. It just goes to show that looks can be deceiving. I think that you may achieve some notoriety because of your looks (attractiveness) through modeling, etc; but, I think that your spiritual gifts, your sharing of the Word, will bring you an eternal reward far greater than any fame or fortune you can achieve on earth.

    Keep the Faith: Jesus is counting on you.

    God Bless.

    1. Hi friend! Oh my gosh thank you. What a beautiful thought – I was actually just talking with my mom the other night about suffering and that’s exactly what she said – it draws us to Him. Thanks for your kind words. You’ve definitely made me chuckle hah 🙂 big hugs xox

  63. It it is impossible to explain stupid. The responder is an insensitive fool and should not be working in a place of recover for anyone.

  64. My goodness — I guess we can all take away the wisdom that it’s important to do our research before saying stupid things, as this woman so obviously failed to do! To look at your photos, it’s obvious that even at a healthy weight, you are slender of frame! You are a lovely woman, Caralyn, and the true intent of your blog is in no way vague or unclear. If this woman couldn’t take the time to do her research, to read about you and your journey — well, I feel sorry for her. <3

    1. Thanks so much Laura. You’re so right – thinking before we speak is such a great lesson to take away from this. i definitely for one, need to take that to heart! hah Sending big hugs xox

  65. She probably just had a quick look and saw how skinny and attractive you are and judged on that. Might be a bit of jealously going on! My first thought when I read her response.

    1. Actually just thinking about my comment prehaps more accurate than jealously is her own insecurities. Some people feel a bit threatened or have a funny attitude towards people who do well in certain areas that they feel challenged by.

  66. Her remark tells me that, devoid of God’s wisdom, we only see what we choose to see.

    Aren’t you glad that you’re not like her? And that you’re able to do something redemptive (pen your most recent blog post) in response to her incredibly thoughtless comment?

    Who knows? Perhaps God allowed this to happen so that you can testify to His goodness and faithfulness. And that’s what you’ve done! Now let’s see what He does next. Hold on to the promises in Jeremiah 29:11, and don’t let this woman’s steal any more of your joy!

    1. thank you so much friend, you’re right – i have a lot to be grateful for, and I cannot begin to understand the ways in which God works, but I can always bank on the fact that He is working it together for Good. thanks x

      1. Never underestimate the power of your testimony. I think your blog is likely impacting the lives of more people than you may ever really realize. God is already using you mightily! Be encouraged.

  67. Hey BBB! I’d like you to know that you are so beautiful, smiles and all! All of the things listed as promoted on this post are true of what your blog does and I’d wonder why anyone would say otherwise but then I’m glad her statement got you to give a clear list 🙂 that can always be referred to in future.
    I appreciate especially point 5: ‘Recognizing that I have worth and value because Christ died for me, and nothing in my past – even an eating disorder – can negate that fact.’ I believe this is very true and will also like to challenge you to begin to believe that you are fertile (and say so). In spite of the facts presented to you, choose to walk in faith as concerns your fertility also (it is not beyond God :)) That said, you’re such a beautiful soul and this is evident in all your posts! Keep it up dear! xx

    1. oh my gosh, thank you so much. you’re so kind to say that! yeah, it definitely made me really define what I do stand for, so that’s a positive 🙂 that is great advice. I’m going to start that TODAY! 🙂 big hugs xox

  68. Be thankful for the “no’s”. I try to remember that rejection is God’s protection. I’m a new blogger – learning so much. I like your willingness to ask for support.

  69. Caralyn:

    Hmm. Think about what this person has said. If she believes that you are skinny, think about her experience with other anorexia survivors. For example, does the more typical survivor respond by putting on too much weight? Knowing that diabetes has almost become a default setting for Americans, that would be my guess.

    What then does that say about your experience and how it is different?

    Because you have returned to a healthy balance, my observation would that your faith walk places you in a different place. IMHO.

    Stephen

    1. Thanks so much Stephen. i really appreciate this powerful perspective. you’re right, God has absolutely been the central force of my recovery, and I couldn’t do it without Him! thanks for stopping by. big hugs x

      1. Thinking about this issue as I swam this morning, I wondered how many anorexia survivors bounce from one food issue to another without serious progress. If this is the norm, then anorexia may be more of a spiritual issue than is normally assumed. If my identity is in my physical image, rather than God’s image, then the spiritual link is established and the problem is idolatry, which is not something that non-Christian counselors know what to do with. This would explain why you found a new balance, when others have not, and why you were subjected to an ad hominem attack.

        BTW. I have been anxiously waiting to hear your take on Wonder Woman…Stephen

      2. Thanks again Stephen. Very true – eating disorders can tend to morph from one form to another. Had it not been for God, I think I would probably be caught in that horrible cycle too. And I haven’t seen WW! I’ll have to check it out 🙂

  70. This is just another of many tests that we must pass. You are enduring and developing a tolerance towards intolerable people. It’s become clear that most people accept us as we are; but many will not. And those are the ones that cause us the most pain. As you celebrate life, continue to chronicle your experiences, as we too are growing with you. You bless your adversaries when you celebrate your victories AND your defeats.

    1. Haha thanks! They’re actually one of my affiliates! Just click on my Reebok ad in my sidebar, and they’re the MET classic shoes 🙂 thanks so much!! Hope you love them as much as I love mine!! 💛

  71. I feel for you in this and hope you know that (like many women who have also struggled with self image, a troubling and high maintenance diagnosis, etc) NEVER ONCE have I thought your blog promotes being skinny! Not that you need that reassurance, because you know that.
    Thank you for your raw and heartfelt display of yourself. You are incredibly inspiring and do not deserve to be scorned – you are already dealing with those repercussions from yourself from those years ago and do not need it from others. God bless you and it’s so motivating to see that you’ve risen above this unfortunate experience and choose to focus on positivity and gratitude rather than resentment. It’s amazing how, too often, others look at the surface and forget to look beyond to see the true meaning and intent of the things around them.
    All the best to you! xx

  72. *a good hug for you* <3
    Be grateful for those who turns you down, because they were not the right ones for you.
    And, they let your path open for those who are.
    Bless you, you are Amazing!

    1. aw thanks so much friend! amen to that! gotta just pray for God’s guidance for my path 🙂 thanks for your encouragement and hugs! sending a hugs right back atcha! xox

  73. I’m pretty sure that woman didn’t act READ your blog. She probably just skimmed through some of the pictures. What she said is flabbergasting!

  74. My goodness that was such a cruel reply. Know what? I think that those of us who point to God (#1 on your own list of who your blog promotes) are going to catch that kind of rejection. “To those who are perishing, we are a dreadful smell of death and doom. But to those who are being saved, we are a life-giving perfume. And who is adequate for such a task as this?” (2 Corinthians 2:16 NLT)

    1. thank you so much for this encouragement. Yeah, just gotta keep my eyes on Him brush off the rest 🙂 a life-giving perfume — what a beautiful way to put it! hugs xox

  75. You are an amazing woman. Each time you post I am touched by your words. I understand how insulted you feel. Breathe… Thank you from the bottom of my heart for all your words as they have once again touched my soul and have helped to lessen my struggle.

  76. I’m so glad you’ve got an amazing support group in your followers! 🙂 And since so many have already echoed what I was going to say, I’ll send a virtual hug instead. If we never meet in person here on earth, I can’t wait to meet you in Heaven. I think we’d have lots of fun conversations. You are truly a light in the darkness, so don’t let one person’s hurtful remark dim your glow. Shine brighter for it. I like what one woman had to say about how sometimes we think we’ll benefit a certain group of people over “here,” when God has far grander plans for us over “there.” He’ll guide you where He wants you to be through those open and closed doors. One step at a time, right? 🙂 Blessings!

    1. thanks so much Laurie. aw, I really appreciate your virtual hug! Yes! I’m sending a big hugs right back to ya. hahah – yes, isn’t that a fun and exciting thought to think about Heaven!! 🙂 Thanks for your encouragement. big hugs x

  77. Just so you know, I have never, never, ever gotten that impression from reading your blog. I just can’t believe it, that is simply crazy.

  78. Be at peace, dear sister. You are beloved.
    If you’re going to go out and speak publicly, you will face this from your audience. Many of them will have succumbed to ED as a reaction to “fat shaming,” and so be predisposed to believe that your story doesn’t relate to theirs.
    Your history of Crohn’s disease could be an effective response to their “skinny-shaming.” You might try sending a follow-up letter (perhaps after taking this post down) to see whether it elicits sympathy and respect.

      1. You’re working through a difficult process. I think that you have confidence in yourself in the context of your established relationships, but may be sensitive to criticism from others. I see this experience as another step towards a deeper healing and evolving strength. When I went through this after my divorce, it didn’t take many experiences of walking in another’s shoes (or “turning the other cheek”) before I realized that people generally reward compassionate persistence.

  79. When you reach out to any potential sponsors remember some will, some won’t, so what…next. The person who sent you the note about ‘skinny’ is obviously not a fit for your blog, next.

      1. Trying to break into the laissez faire world, I see. Good for you. Nevertheless, God is not in very high demand right now. I thought you of all people would know that. I’m not trying to goof or mock. Laissez faire is not that into God. I thought you knew that.

      2. I am really sorry to say it, but those that makes money now in the entertainment is those that takes off their clothes and those that make loud sounds. I’ve seen your pictures. I’ve listened to your recordings on soundcloud. You are neither of these. But good luck, anyway. You’ll find some way through all this, or not.

      3. Okay, so I talked a lot of shit on this post. Again, it’s a game. I’m sorry if you’ve been offended by it. I’m just gonna quit playing. I can see that it goes nowhere. I’m sorry if I offended you in this cat-and-mouse game of search-and-answer search-and-answer. A mind tool to refine refine refine understandings as the refining of gold. It has helped me tremendously in my learning, the ability to question everything, my every belief from top to bottom. Has made me strong. I only hoped to share the techniques of search, study, dig, in order to see if you would appreciate or value these techniques of learning. I am a pioneer in education. Good-bye then. It seems this is our parting. I wish you well in your life struggles, and achievements.

  80. Wow, I stand with you in your frustration and rage. In the short time I have read your blog, I have come to appreciate your voice and how you express yourself. It is something I aspire to, not necessarily on a blog, but in all aspects of my life as a social worker, Jesus lover, friend, and community member. I have no tolerance for forms of ignorance and the injustice that follows from that. I also don’t think you have to justify yourself as a woman and say, “I am not trying to be overly sensitive” because I hate that in our culture women have to justify themselves for saying honest and real things and then fear backlash for the label of being whiny, too emotional, shrill or what have you. Rock on lady! You are a beautiful woman of God, we are not perfect, but thank you for your courage, your voice, and for being unashamed (Romans 1:16). I appreciate you.

    1. Gosh Nathalie, thank you so much for this beautiful encouragement. I am truly so touched by your kind and generous words. This just made my day. Thanks. Hugs and love xox

  81. Caralyn,
    Well done! I guess I’ll never cease to be amazed, appalled, and/or offended by those who speak before they think. Your experience proves once again how some people really need to exercise their freedom of thought before they exercise their freedom of speech. Sorry you had to be on the receiving end of such thoughtlessness.
    My prayers go out to you.
    Be Blessed & Be Well my friend,
    John

    1. Thanks so much John. Yeah this has definitely been a great reminder to think before i speak. i can get a little sloppy on that, but it really is so important. thanks for your prayers and encouragement. big hugs xox

  82. Heck, people say crazy things all the time.
    Ranting is fine. But I’d take your Dad’s advice and let this go as soon as possible. I’ve been misrepresented too and there’s only so long you can dwell on it before it starts affecting your confidence. So it’s just better to forget it.
    For the record, though, skinny promotion is the last thing I would think of in relation to this blog. I question whether anyone who thinks that even read the words.
    Keep it up.

  83. Your Tom gif certainly captures MY reaction to her flippant comment. You’re totally on target to be pissed off about that response. In fact, I’d be sufficiently PO’d to write quite a sharp letter to the center and to their sponsors indicating that perhaps they don’t have a quality eye towards how to respond to things. Yeesh!!!

    I think you left one thing off your list, hope for the ability to see change in the future. And it’s not just hope in Christ (which I know is foremost on your mind and heart) but just hope that although you were really ‘in extremis ‘ at one point, good medical care, continued searching for solutions, and the love of God and family, brought you through. Some may not have the family, or God, but even they can gain hope through your story.

    xox

    1. haha thanks Jeff, yeah I thought it pretty well captured mine as well! thank so much for your kind comment. I love that so much : You’re right – seeing change in the future is so important, and something i strive to do! thanks for making my day brighter : ) big hugs xo

  84. I am so sorry. I am actually shocked that was the response you received (I know I probably shouldn’t be). I think what you’re doing is nothing but positive. Keep doing what you’re doing and don’t let a thoughtless, one sentence response invalidate that. You’ve got this! #warriorsoul 💪💪😀

  85. Wow I can’t believe that was the response from a clinic! Unbelievable. Your blog is great, and I believe it reaches a diverse audience. I am consistently inspired by your resilience and also your exemplary faith. Keep doing what you’re doing! <3

  86. x I’m so sorry that you were sent such a dismissive reply and I’m glad that you decided to speak out about it. I have found your blog and your own spirit inspiring in terms of my own recovery. I also appreciate your spirituality and the genuineness with which you approach life xxx keep writing and believing in yourself and thanks for being you and being here xx Em

    1. thank you so much Em, I really appreciate your kind words about my blog. it seriously means so much 🙂 Know that i am cheering you on in your recovery!! 🙂 big big hugs xox

  87. All they prove is high-level decision maker’s ability to terribly misjudge what they don’t understand based on a cursory look at opportunities. William Paul Young was rejected by several book publishers. Now his book “The Shack” is one of the all-time best selling Christian books, bringing emotional and spiritual healing to thousands.

    You know who you are, Caralyn, and what you’re about. And what you have to give is very much needed. The right people will find you in time. 🙂

    1. Thanks so much Mel. This really means a lot. Oh wow – what a powerful story! I actually just wanted the film version of his book the other weekend and loved it! I was actually thinking about doing a write up about it — very moving! thanks for your encouragement (as always) 🙂 you’re a great friend! hugs x

  88. This is absolutely outrageous! I can’t believe someone – especially a professional who is supposed to be working to help other sufferers – came back with such an unthoughtful, inconsiderate response about your wonderful blog. She definitely can’t have read the content – if she did she would have read the encouraging words and positivity.

    Believe me – professional or not – she has NO idea what she’s talking about. Love to you ❤️ your blog is incredible ❤️⭐️

  89. Forgive me, but then I suck at political correctness, bur HORSE SHIT! Never one have I read your blog and thought yeah she wants people to lose weight or be skinny. You are very open about your recovery and want others to know you are there for them to do the same! What an uncaring twit!

    As a non believer, I sometimes skip over some posts, but others I read time and again. I have found you to be loving, caring, healing and open to all. (OK darn cute as well) I have no idea where that lady would have gotten her opinion.

    The heck with her!

  90. The woman who answered…is she the director? I would suggest her supervisor might need to know the kind of “compassion” she is promoting. And not in the interest of vindictiveness, but in the interest of promoting some positivity. And I’m going to state something obvious, so correct my short-sightedness, if I am wrong, but doesn’t anorexia actually create some “skinny” – even IF the person with anorexia doesn’t believe it? It baffles me that, if she wasn’t interested, couldn’t simply say “Thanks, but no thanks…”

    I think your rant is justified…
    I wish I could rant as respectfully as yourself. I use choice words that have no place among the sensitive…

    1. Thanks friend, yeah it was pretty insensitive. yeah – ‘thanks but no thanks’ would have been the much more tactful way to go! i appreciate your support. thanks for being awesome. hugs xox

  91. Unfortunately, being hasty to judge others is all too common. But, now that you’ve had a chance to get angry and express your anger (congratulations, i always have trouble with that part), perhaps you can forgive, for they know not what they do. From where I sit, you have written a very courageous blog post. Congratulations, again!

  92. This is a very worthy rant from a very misinformed unprofessional person who has chosen the wrong profession! You and God knows your heart behind your blog! Shake off discouragement like a duck shakes off water. Square your shoulders in forgiveness, choose not to be offended and keep on keeping on in the spirit! You have and will touch more people than that person will ever help! Blessings!

    1. Thanks so much friend 🙂 I love that- shake it off like a duck shakes off water – love it. And you’re right – gotta forgive. That’s the best thing to do. Big hugs xox

  93. You do a great job as an advocate for others who are going through what you’ve already been through. I don’t know why but sometimes it is the professionals in certain fields that are the biggest jerks. Pray for them to have a change of heart and lead with a servants heart like you. 😎

  94. Rude and unprofessional. You bare your soul here and help others. Don’t let that person bring you down, or anyone for that matter. You are a survivor!

  95. I’ve had ignorant comments said to me by health professionals too. See if you can report the person. Otherwise, try and brush off the comment. Easier said than done, I know, The comments burn by someone of their stature.

  96. Hi Caralyn, Jesus said a prayer for you in this situation in John 17 :

    9“My prayer is not for the world, but for those you have given me, because they belong to you. 10All who are mine belong to you, and you have given them to me, so they bring me glory. 11Now I am departing from the world; they are staying in this world, but I am coming to you. Holy Father, you have given me your name;b now protect them by the power of your name so that they will be united just as we are. 12During my time here, I protected them by the power of the name you gave me.c I guarded them so that not one was lost, except the one headed for destruction, as the Scriptures foretold.

    13“Now I am coming to you. I told them many things while I was with them in this world so they would be filled with my joy. 14I have given them your word. And the world hates them because they do not belong to the world, just as I do not belong to the world. 15I’m not asking you to take them out of the world, but to keep them safe from the evil one. 16They do not belong to this world any more than I do. 17Make them holy by your truth; teach them your word, which is truth. 18Just as you sent me into the world, I am sending them into the world. 19And I give myself as a holy sacrifice for them so they can be made holy by your truth.

    20“I am praying not only for these disciples but also for all who will ever believe in me through their message. 21I pray that they will all be one, just as you and I are one—as you are in me, Father, and I am in you. And may they be in us so that the world will believe you sent me.

    22“I have given them the glory you gave me, so they may be one as we are one. 23I am in them and you are in me. May they experience such perfect unity that the world will know that you sent me and that you love them as much as you love me. 24Father, I want these whom you have given me to be with me where I am. Then they can see all the glory you gave me because you loved me even before the world began!

    25“O righteous Father, the world doesn’t know you, but I do; and these disciples know you sent me. 26I have revealed you to them, and I will continue to do so. Then your love for me will be in them, and I will be in them.”

      1. This is an example of the world rejecting the Jesus Christ in you. Look to this often as you have times of doubt with your walk with Jesus. By this you shall know your are set apart unto Our Lord’s family. Victory is our Mighty God, go and live confident in this Victory over the world my sister in Christ.

  97. Obviously she only looked at your images and didn’t read the content….as long as you are in good health keep doing what you’re doing. You will never please everyone. Keep going forward and keep the faith!!

  98. Sorry to hear that. Perhaps that person has some of their own hang ups? I haven’t walked in your shoes or struggled with an eating disorder like you did, but I understand the recovery process. And I understand that everyone’s on their own journey–some with God, some without, and all with a variety of ideas of “truth” when it comes to recovering. It looks like you are doing a great service to your readers and seeking God–he will bless this, so hang in there!

    1. Hi Gene, thank you so much for your kindness and encouragement. You’re so right- we are all on our own journeys. So glad our paths crossed 🙂 big hugs to you xox

  99. I once submitted some of my poems to a publisher. I got four words in reply: “Thanks but, we’ll pass.”

    We’ll pass? That just hurt. I didn’t write another poem for over a year and a half. Nothing stings quite so bad as when it hits you where you’ve poured so much of your heart into.

    Anyways, I love your blog. Even if I don’t get to read it as often as I’d like. And she’s totally wrong. Hang in there, you will find the right sponsor!

  100. I’m so sorry you had to get that response! You are one of my favorite bloggers (shhh! 😉) You are such an inspiration by just being you! It really surprises me that a professional IN THAT FIELD would have the lack of knowledge to say that. I’m angry for you 😤

  101. What a completely silly & pointless thing to say (to you.) But isn’t it beautiful to see how God has “used this” to strengthen your own Truth regarding your life and the mission He has tasked you with in helping others. Remember “God does not make junk,” so too has He used this person’s insensitive words to bring a fresh look 👀 at your pure intentions. That’s ultimately grace…. Hugs dear one!💕

      1. Of course! Anytime! I always want to help talented writers trying to make it in the world of literature like I am. Keep it up! Got good stuff!

  102. Oh wow, I am sorry that happened. Is there anyone else you can address that comment to at the treatment facility. Maybe you have already, but if she said that to you it is curious who else she might offend as a patient. Honestly, I do not see this perception of “skinniness” when I visit your blog. I see a beautiful young woman sharing her life experiences so others might learn. And you have a right to be angry. I am angry for you. Wishing you all the best. Hugs.

  103. I’m new to the blogging word, but I’ve got to say, I’ve really been enjoying your posts. Though arguably the manliest man that ever manned, much of what you discuss (chick stuff, lol) hits home for me.

    I too, suffer from health issues, and do my best to eat for optimal fitness.

    Before I got sick, I was a professional athlete. I met lots of different people with different (unsolicited!) opinions about my physique. I think – like many ‘body positive’ types these days that seem to view anything short of obesity as an unrealistic standard of health and beauty – what the woman you encountered is failing to realize is that the antithesis of anorexia is not obesity – it is a healthy body. A healthy body does not carry a ton of excess fat. A body in optimal health is relatively lean and strong – a condition which goes a long way to protecting and preserving joint and cardiovascular heath.

    That said, I know all-too-well that optimal health is not always achievable for a number of reasons; even so, as a Christian, I believe that is our responsibility as believers to do our best to stay in as good a shape as possible so that we’re ready to serve in whatever way God desires. If God calls me to run a marathon (Please, Lord, no!) I want to be ready to do it. And to do that, I can’t be carrying around a ton of excess fat.

    Furthermore, I…

    Huh. It appears I’m babbling. I’ll stop now. 🙂

    Cheers!

    1. Thank you so much Joe. Oh good, I’m so glad you’ve been enjoying my posts! Hahaha oh my gosh you made me chuckle with your manly comments 🙂 cheers to optimal health! Thanks again xox

  104. In my experience, mental health “professionals” are anything but. In the time I spent in “intensive outpatient therapy” I found the other patients to be much more help than the therapists who were assigned to us. Hang in there. You’re doing great and are smart enough to recognize when somebody doesn’t know what they’re talking about. I wish I had a business so I could sponsor you.

    1. Thanks friend. I really appreciate your support. Yeah we need to be careful of the words we speak, because they really do have power. Thanks for stopping by. Hugs and love xox

  105. Wow. I’m a Gryffindor so this was my immediate reaction: I’d like to give them a piece of my mind! But my second reaction is that it’s probably totally inappropriate to reveal contact information like that and it’s best to encourage you that your faithful readers do not see you this way. You post pictures of yourself being happy. You write uplifting material (I’m not Christian myself, but I appreciate your passion and love for your religion because it is deeply meaningful to you, and this is YOUR life you’re talking about, not mine). You promote wellness. You support people. I feel like this thoughtless person didn’t actually read your material. You don’t need “support” from such a person. But I would highly suggest making a comment on their company website and sending a copy of this email to their corporate office or HR. I don’t think you’re the only person who would think her response is highly inappropriate and she should be held accountable by her employer.

    1. thank you much! I really appreciate your kind words about my blog. Yes! Wellness all the way — mind body and spirit. Thanks for having my back 🙂 big hugs xox

  106. I know you’re skinny and thought you just have a healthy diet. Never thought the blog promoted unhealthy habits – I don’t think skinny is necessarily unhealthy, I know people who are skinny and they eat lots (I’m one of them). I completely understand your frustration. We all have our momenta of frustration. I do think it’s important to be on your guard though, because people aren’t generally conscious of how they affect others. And we need a real ‘shield’ in order to keep those arrows from stabbing us. The ‘shield’ is God. He certainly isn’t happy about what that woman did to you (words aren’t just words, they affect us). Next time, you’ll probably be able to just think of God and pray for the person who attacks you. You won’t even need to vent again, because you won’t be hurt. Know yourself & protect yourself. 😀

    1. Thanks, Milly, for your kindness. I really appreciate your support. Amen to that! He is our shield! and your right, praying for her is absolutely the way to go. so glad you stopped by. big hugs xox

  107. I like what your blog stands for. I would suspect it’s hard to keep weight on with UC and being on the SCD diet. I’ve that online but haven’t truer it. Good for you being in remission for so long.

    1. Thank you so much friend. Yeah, it’s been a battle but I’m just so grateful to be healthy and to have found a way to stay in remission!! thanks for your support! hugs xx

  108. Stay strong. The person who read your letter made a snap judgement and that one opinion does not define you. Their judgement says a lot more about them than it does about you.

  109. Thank you for sharing this part of your life and for the reminder that we should never make assumptions when there is so much more about people that we do not know. God bless and keep moving forward!

  110. Don’t listen to those people!! You are so beautiful, and I love what you promote. Keep writing my love!! 🙂

  111. Some people are just weirdly placed in life. If I were to describe this blog skinny would never be in the description. Satan likes to play havoc with our emotions too. Maybe you could go looking for support in the unlikely places! Food for thought. Keep writing and doing what you’re doing. Lots of prayers coming your way 🙂

  112. I’m so sorry this happened, Caralyn. The lady who responded to your email clearly didn’t read any of your posts. You are a very talented writer, and your blog is an inspiration to SO MANY PEOPLE, including me. God has a special purpose for you and your writing. Thank you for being brave and honest and for sharing your heart with the world. Keep writing! Keep sharing! Keep trusting in Him, and He will continue to open doors for you. God bless! 🙂

  113. I seriously doubt they took the time to REALLY look at your blog. I think they read the name of your blog, and did their own assumption. I wanted to let you know, I nominated you for the Versatile Blogger Award. If you would like to accept the reward, check out my blog post with title, the rules are at the bottom. It’s a short award, in which you answer some questions about yourself. : ) congrats!

  114. In my almost “50” years of living I have seen many people that are in the wrong profession, or simply don’t know when it’s time for a change. You look great and healthy.

  115. Your blog not only helps those with eating disorders, (I believe it does), but it also helps the rest of us that struggle with other issues in life. No one has a perfect life this side of heaven. Thank you for caring for yourself and for others. Your insights are encouraging! The pictures are fun and your vulnerability makes me feel like I’m not alone navigating life. 🙂 May God guide your steps. He’s got your back! Ps. 91 all over you is what a friend tells me and I pass it along to you.

  116. I relied on the internet for help before ever talking to anyone, so never find comments about using any site for help as constructive. People don’t understand sometimes. It’s not all pro-Anorexia.

  117. Ugh. She must have been having a bad day! Either that or she’s a troll, and an extremely poor excuse for a psychologist. Anyway, ptooey upon her. I think you’re wonderful!

  118. Hmmmm. I’m from a different generation, and in a different financial situation, so I am not familiar with the idea of seeking sponsorships for a blog. But, I also understand that seeking a career in a creative profession requires some other sources of funding to pay the bills while developing artistic projects.

    As to the potential sponsor, I envision two concepts that jump out from your posts, one being the visual images (hence the skinny snark) and the other is your path to health through spiritual (specifically Christian) beliefs. The former issue is related to our neurological make up (vision connects to 40% of our brains, thus very influential). The second is a contentious point for counselors. On the one hand most behavioral health, and specifically anorexia, is about belief systems. But, we are supposed to be neutral, or secular, in our answers, especially in more urban environments.

    Your posts raise a questions of whether pursuing a spiritual quest in itself is a potential pathway to health, or is Christianity the way (and, more specifically the Catholic expressions within the pantheon of Christian denominations). Now, we are getting into some tough theological territory.

    Please, take my comments as observations, not criticisms of your life experiences. Your most joyous posts are about the mysteries of God’s presence in your daily life. That is much more exciting that counting calories. Other folks may have difficulty with setting aside their own belief systems (spiritual or secular) to give you a listen. –Oscar

    1. Hey Oscar, thanks for this great perspective. Definitely some powerful food for thought there. Yeah, those are some theological questions I think that at the end of the day, every one of us has to look in the mirror and answer. Maybe not particularly pertaining to an eating disorder, but I think we all need to define what we believe in eventually. Thanks for stopping by. Hugs and love xox

  119. In all honesty, I’m grateful a person like that didn’t want to sponsor you! Your good name and wonderful blog don’t deserve to be dragged through the mud with such an uncaring person like this. I’m grateful that you stand strong, and don’t consider for a moment to bend over backwards to please another person. That speaks volumes about who both of you are. Light seeks light, and I don’t think there was any light on their response. Greener pastures are there, you just have to push through the bad and know that everything is in our Father’s hands.

  120. I can attest to this post and to your blog that it’s far from promoting being skinny… You got those 6 things right! Esp. #4.. Anyway, what really matters is what God thinks, Vit B! He is after all Your greatest sponsor that’s why your blog prospers…. More power from above.. 😊

  121. You were not supposed to be angry. Rejection is normal. There was a story of an author who his work was rejected many times. The irony of it is that the same work became a best-seller when it was finally published. there are must always be an opposition in order to move forward, if there is none you would just be in a spot without making progress because you would be too relaxed thinking success is that easy. I wish you the best. A time of selection is coming that there would be too many companies, parastatals, NGOs, … That would wan to sponsor your blog. Best wishes…

  122. Wow! I read the response and was both annoyed and disappointed. You would think a so called healthcare professional wouldn’t be so flippant with their reply. But in the end, you have nothing to prove to them or anyone else for that matter. You inspire others and you serve your savior and creator. Nothing else matters.

  123. Wow. Over 400 replies. Sorry. Can’t read all of them.

    I agree that a mental health professional shouldn’t write or say such things particularly to someone recovering from an eating disorder, but then again maybe that person is recovering too and still dealing with personal issues. At the risk of being overly personal, you are an attractive person and that could be threatening to some other people who see through the eyes of their own body image issues.

    However, that doesn’t excuse what was written and it’s subsequent impact on you. Yes, you have a right to be angry. Hopefully since this incident occurred, you’ve had an opportunity to process and realize someone else can’t define your worth as a human being and a child of God.

    People can be real jerks but God sees us for who we truly are.

    1. Thanks James! Yeah I am definitely grateful for all of the support. You’re right, it wasn’t a kind remark but I will cling to God’s truth! 🙂 Hugs and love xox

  124. I appreciate the six things you promote on BeautyBeyondBones. Keep doing the good work. Sorry about the hurtful response you got. You win some, and lose some. You will meet the right sponsors.

  125. I am so sorry that they responded that way. So unacceptable! I wish you much success! I’m starting a blog, too, and I can’t wait to check out more of yours for inspiration!

  126. She was probably not even a counselor, or a professional of any kind. Probably someone’s aide or secretary and weighs 400 lb and has a chip on her shoulder for anyone who is pretty and healthy. Bet my money on it. I’ve dealt with that kind my whole life, and if you’re not careful, they will tear you down.

  127. I can’t believe she said that… she’s wrong. So wrong. Please know that I consider you and your blog a blessing, because you encourage me every time I read one of your entries. So thank you. I’m so sorry she replied to you that way, but know this: you are a blessing and an inspiration to so many, myself included. Sending you huge hugs and so much love ❤❤