Order in the Chaos

Hello friends! First off, tonight, I want to say a huge thank you for the wonderful feedback about my talk! In case you missed it, I’ll link it below! But just wanted to express my gratitude for the wonderful words of encouragement and love. I’ve been floating on Cloud Nine all weekend.

Any way — onto the post!

If there’s one thing I love about NYC, it’s the abundance of fun and interesting opportunities that will spontaneously present themselves.

Culturally, socially, philanthropically, professionally — it’s a melting pot of sorts.

Well, last week – I had the pleasure of attending the Young Adult Mass at the one and only St. Patrick’s Cathedral. It was super fun – the church is packed with young people, and then afterwards they rent out a bar and you go and mingle and dance — it’s pretty fun.

Well — anyways. The priest said something at the very end of mass that really stuck with me: He said, “Go and be the order in the chaos.”

Be the order in the chaos.

What a thing to say to a bunch of millennial New Yorkers huh? I mean, you haven’t seen chaos until you’ve tried navigating the subway during rush hour on a Friday!

But truly though, the state of our world is truly unprecedented. I was recently talking to my dad about this — how things are just absolutely helter skelter. Politically (I mean, hello — impeachment efforts??); Environmentally, there’s a war on plastic straws; Culturally, we are torn at the seams over truly important issues — like government, immigration, the sanctity of life, family values, international relations, etc; I mean I could go on and on!

Just turn on the news for 30 seconds and you’ll be bombarded with the chaos we’re facing on all fronts.

Be the order in the chaos.

During my talks in Memphis, I had a Q&A portion at the end, and I was really blown away by the insightful questions people posed.

But on Sunday – I was asked a particularly poignant question by a gentleman — and he asked how it is to be in the acting business as a Christian. And how do I live out my faith in that arena?

I mean wow — what a question.

I think we’ve all got our own specific forms of chaos in our lives, right? Maybe it’s the politics on the school board, or keeping your kids’ schedules straight and running them around from one activity to the next. Or maybe it’s maintaining a straight and narrow recovery path, or XYZ…we’ve all got our own personal chaos.

And for me, navigating the messy, godless entertainment industry where roles call for nudity, or characters that completely go against what I believe — chaotic doesn’t even come close to describing what it’s like.

And as a result, I have to choose carefully the roles that I choose to accept, and as a result it has really limited what I do — to the tune of pretty much solely doing commercials and kids educational videos. — Which to be clear, I’m very grateful for.

But the second part of his question really hits on what the priest instructed us to do: to be the order in the chaos.

While I can’t say I’ve ever tried to evangelize in the casting offices of New York, I do try to live my life in a way that makes people ask, “What’s different.”

I’m not a very “in your face” kind of Christian. Which is why I practically got stress hives when I went and prayed outside of the Planned Parenthood on NYU’s campus.

But it’s safe to say, I’m more of an actions-speak-louder-than-words kind of gal.

But don’t let that discount the power of quietly visibly living your faith, rather than blaring the trumpets. Because much like The Butterfly Effect, you never know what one positive interaction or one display of Christ’s love can do.

I never want my faith to be combative or off putting. I never want to force it on anyone, or be such a bombastic display that it makes people feel uncomfortable.

Because, real talk: we’re living in a time where “religion” and “faith” are seen as so antiquated, and close minded. People frankly don’t want anything to do with it.

I want my faith to be attractive. To invite people to wonder where I get my joy? Where my peace comes from? Because it’s in a one-on-one interaction, where a person is genuinely listening and wants to know the answer that hearts soften and change.

Not over a loud speaker, or in a shouting match in the Facebook comments section.

It’s in the order. It’s in the peace. It’s in the extra patience or grace you show someone. It’s responding with love and compassion rather than judgement or harsh confrontation. It’s trying to lessen tension with a spirit of understanding and peace. It’s finding joy in the ordinary. Be the order in the chaos.

May this week the Holy Spirit bless us with the fruits of His Spirit, so we can be that order in the chaos: Be His Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self-Control in a world that could use a whole heck of a lot more of these.

“This is what the Lord says to these bones: I will make breath enter you, and you will come to life.” Ez 37:5

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111 responses to “Order in the Chaos”


    So, Security Holistically As a Demand EveryOne; well We:

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    I Have RAW EveryOne; RAW is a TLA (Three Letter Acronym) for Having a Radically Altering WorldView Being a Changing Perception of The Before, During and After 🤓 …basically I Was Born without a WorldView then, at about age two or three, My Self Emerged with Plenty of ‘Why 🤔 ?’ Questions and My Parents, Teachers and Other Authority Conditioned Me with ‘Do as you are told or else!!!’; so My Parental WorldView created a Lot of Misery for Me over the years 😕 …then Something Wonderful happened 😊 ; it’s Crystal Clear Clarity that I Remembered and Realised that there is NO!!! Authority in My 3DLife but Me 😀 …it was Me, once again, with The Clear THINKING!!! of a Child but NoOne to Bully and ‘Discipline’ Me in to Things that I Didn’t Wanna Do; so I Have Returned to The Purity of My Childlike State, therefore, the ‘Unpleasant’ Things like ‘Rejection’ ARE, once again, Water Off A Ducks Back and Processed Pretty Quickly to The State of ‘NEXT!!!’ so ‘Succeed’ or ‘Fail’ who gives a fuck (WGAF) 🤔 ? These Links Have Been Invaluable for Me; I Hope They Help You Too 🤗 :


    ◇ – Diamond Hard – ◇


  2. Amen-Amein Sweet Sister in Christ-Messiah Jesus-Yeshua Carolyn!!

    Thanks so much for Sharing your Story Above!!

    GOD Bless You and Your Family and Friends!!

    Love Always and Shalom ( Peace ), YSIC \o/

    Kristi Ann

      • Love hearing your testimony of how Jesus rescued you from Anorexia. I know want you went through but my story is a bit different! Praise God from whom all blessings flow! Thank you for sharing your long difficult road with Anorexia!

  3. I agree that not all of us can do one-on-one evangelism. I can speak to a group, even preach, but am not good at speaking to individuals, except if I am asked how I can be at peace. Then, I tell a story of how God blessed me, a miracle story, and people are amazed at his being there for me. I let th em know that none of us is ever alone. But, the thought of rejection or being made fun of generally means I speak only when asked to do so. It isn’t my strength, and I know it.

    • I definitely feel you there!! You’re right – never alone. Love that 🙂 Hugs and love xox

  4. Your comment re. visibly living one’s faith caught my attention. Pr. Chuck said something very like this in his sermon yesterday. He spoke of an article about Christians berating homosexuals at some rally, calling them names and angrily telling them they are all going to hell. He didn’t think anyone in that crowd asked what church they went to so they could come join.

    He spoke of how Paul was in Greece and saw the alters to a variety of gods, including the unknown god (just so they didn’t offend anyone!). Paul didn’t berate them over worshipping false gods. He told them about the loving God they didn’t know yet. Honey, not vinegar. So many of us Christians miss that, confusing the sin with the sinner. Would that your priest had a more global pulpit!

    Joy in the ordinary. Order in the chaos.

    I hope you saw my open letter to BBB last Saturday. A few additional thoughts on sharing your story so bravely. Again, it was so good having you here!

    • Right – we need to show His love through OUR love and joy and kindness. Honey not vinegar – that’s the best way to put it! Thank you 🙂 oh my gosh No! I didn’t!!! Holy cow I’ll go read it right as soon as i get off the subway! I had the busiest weekend with two visitors so I’m finally just coming up for air. Lots of catch up. But WOW I am touched and excited to read it! Thank you thank you Jeff!!! Have a great night! Hugs to you and Julie!

  5. Perfect! I think you’re doing it just the way the Lord expects you to. I do it the same way. And I’m very peaceful about it. I remember when I was an atheist and feeling oppressed by religious Christians trying to tell me about how beautiful their faith was. Never seemed beautiful to me with their insistence to tell me about it.

    • Thank you so much! Aw, I appreciate that vote of confidence. Yeah that’s a great point. That’s for the insight!! Hugs and love xox

  6. “Preach the Gospel, and if necessary, use words.” – attributed to St. Francis of Assisi.

    Funny thing; our limited conversations are through comments on this blog. The first time I heard your voice was the Youtube video you posted about the ladies pack. 🙂

    I am glad your talk went well. And getting the hard questions can be a backhanded compliment that you’re doing the right thing, but the questioner has been forced to change his paradigm in the right way. “Really? You can do that? I never thought it was possible!”

    • Oh my gosh I LOVE that quote! So true!! Oh haha that’s too funny! Yes! YouTube is a game changer, huh!? Thanks for the kind words! Hugs and love xox

  7. You are a good speaker, I am just coming out too. My past of mental illness has kept me in fear. Even now I am struggling with coming out of the closet about my past with my book and having my name exposed. Thanks for your encouragement. God uses our journeys to glorify <3

    • Thank you so much Shannie for sharing your story. Congrats on your journey! Yes He does!! Hugs and love xox

  8. Its not a coincidence that sin is described in the catechism as “inherently disordered”. Thank you for sharing these motivational words. Thinking of our lives as bringing order is definitely a positive way to describe working towards a higher calling.

    Congratulations also on your recent successes. You are moving with greater speed now, your reach is growing tremendously. You are bringing order to others lives too!

    • thanks Scoot – yes! i thought his quote was quite poignant and timely 🙂 thank you so much for your kind words! oh my gosh, i am seriously so touched! you’re the best! hugs xo

  9. “Order in the chaos” to me is a beautiful expression that means peace to me in any circumstances. When the world is falling apart and people are pulling their hair out crazy, I have peace. When it is calm, I have peace. Being ever peaceful in any environment. That can only happen with the Holy Spirit, in my experience. And it is much more meaningful to live out our faith than speak it, but there is a time for that too. This requires wisdom to know which is talk time, but it is always living it out time. Great post. As always, love you, beautiful friend. Hugs! XO😄❤

    • hey Tonya! oh thank you 🙂 yes! peace in any circumstance – i love that. so beautiful. and you’re right about that – takes much much wisdom. thanks for stopping by! hope your week’s off to a great start! hugs xox

    • oh my gosh Teri what an incredibly kind thing to say. God is good 🙂 And I am just grateful for the opportunity to share how He rescued this mess! haha big big hugs to you my friend xox

  10. Well put, kiddo. Certainly being order in this chaotic world is exactly how you described yourself. To let your life speak louder than words. Who was it that said something like, “Preach the gospel to all. And sometimes use words.”. God’s grip – Alan

    • oh thank you so much Alan 🙂 I love LOVE that quote — sometimes use words – how incredibly true! hugs to you xox

  11. Christ never promised that life would be a bed of roses. But He did promise that you never have to face your struggles alone. For the most part, Christian or not, we’re never alone; even if we think we are.

    Looking at our world, its easy to just get caught up in all the hype and begin to panic. When you look at the life of Christ, you see miracle after miracle, event after event. Even the life of the Apostles were full of such events and miracles and you wonder whether we are supposed to be the same; are we actually living our lives to the full potential of Godliness… ?

    Truth, we are. Christians aren’t called to live extraordinary lives. We’re called to live ordinary lives, extraordinarily well. We’re called to live our lives in such a way that doesn’t boast so much but is different from the unbeliever standing beside us.
    Often you think that the best Christian is the one on stage preaching day and night. Or the one on his knees every single moment. While all these things are good, it is truly by their fruits do you notice whether they are true Christians. Do they exude love, compassion, etc. Do they demonstrate the fruits of the spirit?
    So Caralyn, you’re doing the right thing. Spread by being.
    We show the difference in how we are handling the challenges of our current world. Exactly like what the priest said, “Being the order in the chaos.”

    • You’re so right about that – we’ve never alone. What a comforting thought. I love this response, thank you so much! Hugs and love xox

  12. Nice post dear 😀.
    It’s not so much as being antiquated and closed minded that people have turned their backs on religion as it is people are tired of it being used as a weapon to discriminate against people that are different just as are government is using it as a weapon to discriminate and cause decenthon among the people, it’s the same old crap that’s been going on for century’s of ” are way is the only way ” and people are gust getting tired of it.

    I don’t mean to offend dear I just think you need to see the bigger picture of why people are turning their backs on religion.
    I personally don’t care what anyone believes tell it interferes with some else’s right to freely live their life then it’s a problem.


    • Than you so much! That’s really profound insight. Makes me think for sure. Hope your week is off to a great start! Hugs and love xox

      • Your welcome dear 😀.
        It’s just what I’ve ran into from talking to other people, I knew a evangelist years ago that left the Catholic Church because of their discrimination of LGBT+ people he sad and I qwote ” it’s just wrong and wouldn’t support that ” so he left and started supporting the LGBT+ community.
        Thank you dear. 😀

        BY FOR NOW

  13. What a powerful conformation of my journaling today from Luke. So excited to see God moving in your life and reaching out even to mine through your words. Be Blessed, Paul

    • Thanks Paul! Oh I’m so glad this hit home with you today! I appreciate your kind words. Hugs and love xox

    • You’re so right about that!! Let it shine let it shine let it shine! Hugs and love xox

  14. Very nice…as always. “In your face Christians” are the bane of Christianity. There desperation reveals their deep-seated dissatisfaction with themselves and fear of life. I know. “Been there, done that.”

  15. It’s funny how you mention how you aren’t a in your face type of Christian. I completely relate to that. I see people posting Bible verses daily and always taking about God in their posts on social media. I don’t really do that unless I feel like sharing something that really hits me. Or if I feel like it’s the right time. It is more how we do stuff in our daily lives. If we didn’t have social media no one would be posting anything. It would simply be our actions and how we talk! ❤️ Makes me feel “normal” lol

    • Thank you so much Rachael. i agree — both have the time place, but I am muc more comfortable with the latter 🙂 hugs xox

    • thank you so much Amanda! And gosh, you’re kind to say that! thanks for watching!!! hugs xox

  16. Order in the chaos – love it! Just remember that although Jesus would never seek to hurt anyone’s feelings, the gospel was (and IS) offensive. It’s not necessarily attractive.

    • thank you so much Gina!! you’re right about that – it was written to divide. that’s important to remember — faith is not always comfortable. hugs xo

  17. I watched your video on YouTube. I had a friend of mine watch it with me so that way he would understand how much work and courage it takes to get over a ED. Thank you for sharing.

    • oh wow — that’s so awesome that you were able to watch it together! i hope it sparked some fruitful discussion 🙂 hugs xo

  18. As you know I watched your inspiring video. what you don’t know is that you have inspired me that much that i’m thinking on doing a video blog on my health conditions which i mentioned to you on twitter. It’ll be a lot of hard work I know and possibly time consuming what’s your opinion on that Caralyn?

    • Hi Kenneth – oh my gosh thank you so much for watching, and I am so thrilled for you that you’re going to be sharing your story! i look forward to watching it!!! Yes – it is quite a time comsuming endeavor – mainly because it’s so emotionally exhausting. but DEFINITELY worth it! hugs xox

      • Thanks, Will need to give it a lot of thought, it may not be immediate as I have one or two things happening @ the moment & a holiday @ the end of month

  19. I was praying for you. I am listening to one of your talks now. I am so thankful that God has allowed you to own your story. We all have stories to own which will better the Kingdom of glory. Bravo my dear sister. Your delivery, poise and posture are stunning just like you. I am so proud of you.

    • Aw Ada that seriously means so much. Thank you listening and for your prayers! God definitely answered them! 🙂 I am so touched by this 🙂 Hugs and love xox

  20. Thank you for being the order on the chaos. As for you faith, I am like you. If you live it out, people will begin to notice, and they will want what you have.

  21. I wonder what the priest meant by chaos and order. You seem to think it’s everything you’re against or don’t understand. What then is order? The jackboot on the neck of any thing other? Or the pollyanna picture you paint of ersatz uncaring?

    Maybe the chaos is Yeats’ The Second Coming where the falcon can not hear the falconer. What do you think?

  22. I enjoyed watching your video, thank you. It’s much easier for me to get a feel for who you are, as opposed to just reading your blog posts.

    “We’re all recovering from something” – YES! For me, it’s drugs and sugar addictions. But I’m part of a 12 Steps fellowship and I’m trying to learn how best to connect again with God / my Higher Power.

    Love, compassion, unity – they’re all so important for people like us who often (falsely) used to think of ourselves as worthless.

    “The voice of ED” – I can relate. For me, it feels like I have a cartoon devil on my shoulder who every day whispers at me that it’d be a great idea to take drugs again. So far, I’m doing Ok at ignoring it. I’m roughly 50 days clean today.

    Thank you for being so brave and honest. I could relate to lots of what you’ve said. Best of luck with everything 🙂

    • Thank you so much for watching! And for your kind words. Yeah as the saying goes a picture’s worth 1000 words — then a VIDEO must be worth 1000 blog posts! Hahaha thanks for sharing your heart. Hugs and love xox

  23. Such an inspirarional challenge! Love it. Peace and order and joy…may we radiate those as we soak them in from the Father. Thanks for your words of encouragement!

    • Thanks so much KJ!! Yes! Peace and order and joy — those are the ultimate goal! Hugs and love xox

    • Thank you so much!! oh my gosh what a beautiful thing to say — you can do it! I believe in you 🙂 one day at a time, one baby step at a time 🙂 hugs x

  24. I like this. You make the goal to live with Christian values a reality and doable. Plus I can’t help but thinking that you will make someone a wonderful wife. So as you keep dating, hold out for God’s best for you. You deserve him.

    • Thank you so much!! Oh my gosh what a kind thing to say 🙂 that is truly what I am most excited for in life 🙂 have a great weekend! Hugs and love xox

  25. Caralyn, Thanks for sharing your amazing testimony! What a testimony to the power of Jesus and how He loves us. God is using you in a powerful way!

    • Thank you so much Susan! God is so good and I’m so grateful for the work He’s done in my life!! Hugs and love xox

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