20/20 2020

You want to hear something crazy?

There is one month left in this entire DECADE.

Yes – decade.

I mean, I remember when Y2K was a thing back in 1999. People were preparing for doomsday with canned goods and generators and bottled water. Meanwhile, I was just playing NeoPets on the computer, listening to Blue Da Be Dee on repeat.

But that was twenty years ago. TWENTY YEARS!

And now, we’re one month away from 2020 — the roaring twenties. And so now is the time to go for it. If there was ever a moment to take a shot, to burst out of your comfort zone, to do something a little crazy — now is the time!

Gosh, this past decade — it’s been quite a journey. I’ve truly solidified my recovery from anorexia. I’ve learned how to take care of myself – mind, body and spirit. And I’ve been working to create a meaningful life.

I’m not going to bore you by looking back. But I thought I’d take a minute to share what I want to take with me going forward into this next decade.

Because after all, hindsight is 20/20 – HAH! But for real – maybe the hindsight from this past decade can be a blessing this next go around.

1) Cherish Time with Loved Ones

Life is fragile. I’ve seen this with friends. I’ve seen this with my mom’s stroke. You just never know what is going to happen tomorrow. So put down the phone, be present with the people you love, and really savor every moment. Living far away from the people I love most in this world is really difficult. And quite honestly, it has me reevaluating a lot of things. But one thing I know for sure is that I will never EVER take a single moment we have together for granted. Life is too short.

2) Fall in Love with Taking Care of Yourself

This past decade was full of highs and lows for my health. Recovering from anorexia aside, battling such a severe Ulcerative Colitis flare in 2012 — which left me on bedrest for 11 months — truly forced me to have to learn how to care for my body, and quite honestly: kick any lingering ED habits I was still holding onto out of my life once and for all. I had to get serious about my complete spectrum of health: mind, body and spirit. And one of the biggest things was balance. If one of those areas was off: no bueno.

And honestly, thank you Jesus, for bringing the Specific Carb Diet into my life, because since adopting it in 2012, I have been symptom and medication free from my Ulcerative Colitis.

Which leads me to….

3) Trust that Setbacks are Actually Set Ups

Never in a million years would I have thought I’d be grateful for that year of bedrest from my Ulcerative Colitis. I mean, I was in a show in New York, I had to move home and live on my parent’s couch for a year as a fresh twenty-something! My world came crashing down. It was the biggest setback — aside from the anorexia — I had ever faced.

But you know what? It was actually the greatest set up of my life. Because I gained the greatest perspective and season of personal growth, that I could have only gleaned by going through such a tumultuous time. I learned perseverance. Faith. Trust. And — I finally kicked my unhealthy addiction to exercise, and adopted a three-meals-a-day lifestyle, that up until then, I had been skirting, due to lingering ED habits.

Not to mention, I loved getting to spend that special — albeit excruciatingly painful — time with my parents, and reconnecting with them as an adult.

God never lets our pain be for nothing. It will never be in vain. He uses it all, and will create something positive from it. We can trust that with our whole heart. And even though, in the midst of the suffering, it’s nearly impossible to see, God’s goodness will ultimately prevail.

4) Create an Environment Conducive to Blooming

Adopting recovery from anorexia can be challenging, because when you return to “the scene of the crime,” if you will, there will always be a shadow that follows you around, reminding you — and others — of your life in the eating disorder.

Memories are a powerful, powerful thing. And one of the most helpful decisions I made was to change my environment to be pro-recovery. I moved to New York. It was the clean slate I needed to create a life that was not overshadowed by dark memories from a destructive past.

5) Say YES to Life

This last one here, is the best, in my opinion. And one that I’ve really adopted here recently. After spending years in my anorexia isolating myself, and closing myself off to love and relationships — saying YES to life, to love, to adventures, to spontaneity, to FUN — it is amazing what it can do.

God created us to live life to the FULL. An abundant life, in every aspect of the word. A life enslaved to an eating disorder — where everything is stifled and suppressed, and closed off — it kills the beautiful part of our spirit that was created for community, and joy, and vulnerability.

Giving myself permission to feel those things has been the biggest game changer for me. And it all starts with the little word: YES.

We always ask God to show us His plan, and to change our situations — we need to allow Him to do so — and it starts with opening the doors that He presents to us. SAY YES!

So there ya go! This coming decade, I pray that we all can live in the beautiful, life-affirming abundance that God created us to enjoy.

The truth of the matter is that we are loved beyond our wildest imaginations. And the sooner we accept that, and then love ourselves in that same way, the sooner we can live FROM that joy that only He brings.

I pray that for me, and I pray that for you, my friend.

May 2020 be the year of living out 2019’s 20/20 hindsight!

What are some lessons YOU want to bring with you in 2020??

“This is what the Lord says to these bones: I will make breath enter you, and you will come to life.” Ez 37:5

A big thank you to my foundational sponsor, BetterHelp Online Therapy. I cannot begin to express how beneficial therapy was for my recovery from anorexia.  Speak with an online therapist. Or check out content about eating disorders from BetterHelp.

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179 thoughts on “20/20 2020

  1. It’s almost too hard to believe!!
    I’m loving all that cute jokes!
    I love that idea of thinking of a set back as a set up! ❤
    Praying for you, Caralyn! Me and God love you! ❤

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    1. Haha aw thank you Gail 🙂 I appreciate your prayers! Yes! It’s a set up for His plan!! Hope you have a beautiful weekend! Love you friend! Xox

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    1. Thank you so much Mathews! That’s so kind of you to say! It’s been a beautiful journey for sure 🙂 hope you have a great weekend! Hugs and love xox

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  2. One thing that’s pretty far out to think about is that we’ve already spent most of the time that we will spend with our parents in the past. So if we value those relationships it’s good to think about ways to still give them time.

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    1. Oh my gosh this struck a spot in my soul this morning. Going to call my parents now. Haha thanks for stopping by Hugs and love xox

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  3. I just spent ten years (2008-18) as a caretaker for my mom while she slowly withered away from Alzheimer’s Disease. It took a huge toll on my health too, although I am gradually gaining back muscle and weight. Dad was a Vietnam Veteran and died of a brain tumor in 2001. These days I am thinking about that ‘precarious hang gliding flight’ I have always wanted to try one day at the nearby Outer Banks. Of course, I’m petrified of heights, but why should that stop me? (ha ha) My mom and dad loved Elvis and the 1950s, and now I love memories of the 1980s, especially at our local Busch Gardens and Water Country USA. Each year seems to go by even faster than the previous one, so I try to catch as many sunrises and sunsets as I can each week. Money is nice, but the way we spend our time is of the utmost importance. As Mark Twain penned so much better than I ever could ‘there isn’t time, so brief is life, for bickerings, apologies, heartburnings, callings to account. There is only time for loving, and but an instant, so to speak, for that.’

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    1. Oh John I am so sorry to hear that. Gosh that breaks my heart. Alzheimer’s disease is so tough. I hope you get to do hang gliding. It would certainly be a pinnacle of a challenging journey for you. Only time for loving – what a powerful thought. Thank you for stopping by and sharing your heart. Hugs and love xox

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  4. You need to go back to the beginning.

    In kindergarten. The first number is ONE. One is the loneliest, in kindergarten. It took an entire year to get to First Grade. The decade has one more year which begins on January 1, 2020. That WAS the Y2K problems. I thought the universe figured it out.

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  5. Neopets! I had completely forgotten about them. And I can’t believe 1999 was twenty years ago…wow.

    I’m a recovering people-pleaser, so 2020 will be the start of a new decade where I pay attention to the little internal red flags when I realize I may be going along with something just for approval’s sake, and not because I genuinely want to or agree with it. I have to work on conquering my fear of “doing it wrong” and just jump in and help someone. And I’m going find five simple meals that I’m able to cook, by the end of 2020.

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    1. Hahaha blast from the past right?!! I know – WILD. yes!!! I love your intention for 2020 – I can definitely relate! And woo! What a great goal for the five meals! Let me know which five you decide on – I need some inspiration! Haha have a beautiful afternoon! Hugs and love xox

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  6. Love, love, love this post. A timely reminder of what’s important. Thank you for articulating this so well. You have an amazing gift with words.

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  7. “God created us to live life to the FULL.” Amen.

    “I came that they may have life and may have it abundantly.” John 10:10 blb

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    1. Oh my gosh you’re so kind to say that. thank you so much! I know!! 1999 seems like only 10 years ago!! thanks for stopping by! hugs xox

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  8. Great post. Oh, and just an FYI. At least the Computer programmers we knew didn’t make anything extra when Y2K happened. They were salaried employees (not paid for overtime even though they worked a ton of overtime). I remember those days clearly. The company I worked for had to change and retest a ton of software and get it sent out to the customers in time. If companies like ours didn’t do that there would have major issues around the world. So besides wondering about our own families everyone was super stressed out at work. I am hopeful for the next year. This year definitely had it highs and lows.

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    1. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts on this! Oh woods that’s such fascinating insight!! Wow. I’m hopeful for next year for you too 🙂 Hugs and love xox

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