Well, in case you missed it, The Bachelor ended Monday night.
And America’s boyfriend, Ben, got engaged.
I know. Pass the Ben & Jerry’s.
Ben’s popularity this season has been unprecedented.
He’s handsome. A former quarterback. Christian. Midwestern. Loves his mama. Wears his heart on his sleeve. I mean, I even found myself saying, “I want a Ben!”
I did! I saw the way he was looking at his now-fiance, and I got swept up in the romance and the sappy background music, and soft pink lighting. I fell for it. Thanks, ABC.
But falling asleep that night, something hit me.
Yes, Ben was a great guy: he was kind, loving, open about his faith, had a good solid background, and a chiseled jawline to boot. But the fact is – he loved two women. At the same time.
All the fanfare and romance and showy drama of the production forces fans to miss that glaring fact: Ben’s “fairytale” love story is no fairytale at all.
The fact is, I do not want a Ben.
I want the furthest thing from Ben.
I want a man who would never put me in a position to compete for his love. I want a man whose love will never waver. Who will always be faithful. And will never cause me to doubt that.
That is the man I want to marry.
And I have faith that God is forming the heart of my future husband to be just that.
But the show is smart, with its choice editing, playing up this or that, flowering it with sweeping vistas, swelling music, and close ups of our brooding boy…we can somehow miss that giant elephant in the room. Or, at the very least, forgive it. We can even forget the fact that Ben sleeps with three different women, three nights in a row. The man I want to marry will not do that. The man I want to marry will stand up and say, “that is not right.”
And don’t get me wrong. I love me some Bachelor. I mean, I do not miss a show. I Tweet along. Read recap blogs. I am all in.
But I have to remember that it is just a show. And real love is out there, and handsome as it may appear — it’s not Ben.
You all have been on this journey with me. Having only just recently opened my heart to love and allowing another person to love me — It has been scary. It is the last step in my recovery from anorexia. A disease which annihilated my self love and self worth, and with it, the notion that I deserve love from another person.
But with God’s strength, I’ve chosen to open up that part of myself and test the waters.
Some failed attempts. Some learning opportunities. But none the less, I’m growing. *Still single,* but open to love.
But I’ll tell you this, attractive as Ben and his fairytale love may appear, I respect myself enough to demand a love that is real. A love that is honest. Faithful. Unquestioning.
1 Corinthians 15:6 “Love…rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts…”
Those words have a different weight when you read it thinking about The Bachelor, huh?
If there’s one thing I’ve learned in recovery, it is that my heart is worth something. It was purchased at a price and belongs to the King. And its worth demands that it be cherished and treated as the precious gift it is.
My heart is worth protecting.
And unlike Ben, my future husband will do just that.
246 responses to “A Heart Worth Protecting”
Love your post! 🙂 waiting for that future husband with those traits as well:))
Thank you so much! Yes definitely:) thanks for stopping by! Hugs xox
xoxo IT’S AWESOME THE PICS THAT OPENS THE STORY WHAT YOU ARE WRITING AND IT MAKES IT ALL SO CLEAR!!! STOP BY AND CHECK OUT MY BLOG YOU MIGHT ENJOY!!
Thank you so much! I’ll definitely check out your site! thanks for stopping by xox
What a brilliant writer you are! Such a bright light, and beautiful soul, you deserve all that the King desires for your heart. Blessings.
Aw thank you so much! Gosh that’s so kind of you to say. God is good! Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love cox
I never saw the appeal of competing for a partner; whether it’s on a new TV show or “in real life”.
I hear ya! Seems so silly when you really stop and think about it! Thanks for stopping by xox hugs!
You are right, it is just a show that uses all of its tools and resources to market a fairy tale illusion, which isn’t really love at all in my books. Sure, it may be a romantised version but it’s not all reality. A real man wouldn’t risk the heart of someone he really loved.
Thanks Miriam! A fairy tale illusion is right. Cheer to real men! Hehe thanks for stopping by! Hugs cox
And one big one back to you!
I’m not convinced that the people in the show carry on a real relationship post production.
Hi there! Hmm you very well could be right about that! Simply a tabloid relationship. We will never know! Thanks for stopping by! Hugs xox
I always have to have my portion of skepticism regarding the entertainment world. Keeps my life spicy!
👍☺️☺️spice it up! Hehe
So well said! I worry about shows like the bachelor and the impact they have on young people’s expectations of love and romance. It’s so great to hear an alternative perspective being put out there
Hey Tim! Thank you so much! You’re right-it does create a False expectation, as well as a skewed sense of normalcy. Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox
Thank you for writing this. Hollywood has broken up a lot of relationships — especially since the advent of online dating. If a guy doesn’t treat a woman like The Bachelor (or if a woman doesn’t act like The Bachelorette), viewers go shopping for a new mate. It’s ridiculous.
Thank you so much! Yeah unfortunately what you say is true😢 sad reality. Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love to you xox
I may be new to this whole Christian thing. But I find that each time I read your blog I experienced a little bit about what you’re thinking. I can’t help but expected same thing from a different gender rather than a guy named Ben. Give me an Alyssa Allison or Alexandria you my friend are very rare special you even though you have your struggles through past circumstances you certainly Define Beauty for what it should be. I think proverbs 31 describes you and tonight I’m going to write about proverbs 31 and dedicate this post to you… keep your eyes open for it and most certainly keep your eyes toward the Sun if he makes you smile because that may be your best feature yet.
Thank you so much Anthony. That means a lot 🙂
No problem I know how you feel. I may be just a little bit older than you but I’m still single and everybody else still gets married it’s kind of a bummer butt I’m still waiting to find a girl after God’s Own Heart the book his needs above my own.
You’ll find her! 🙂
The only problem is I don’t think she exists in Canada or my home country for that matter being Italy. I may have to go to Japan Sweden or Germany to find her. Not in a particular order of course. Although I would be heartbroken if I did because then and missed church service in the states I love the states although you got to work on your health care. I think that’s the only thing stopping me from moving over there
Dear BBB. I wanted to take some time to say that I read your blog today and like always it was wonderful I have to say though I think what makes your writing so awesome is that your authenticity and your belief screams out to people. There’s a real sense of real life there that people can grasp onto. You have to know that you’re making a huge difference not just in my life but many others for that gun will be smiling upon you. Have a great night BBB. I just thought I would send a little encouragement your way. Keep blogging and keep up the good work my friend.
Thank you so much 🙂
Your welcome bud
by the way I wouldn’t be in good Christian if I didn’t say have a wonderful Easter and just remember this he arose he arose he arose
Amen to that! Same to you ☺️
I’ll be going to the us tomorrow so the biggest Easter Service I look forward to it…
Dear friend I recently read your post about the Brussels attacks what happened in Europe and I want to comment on your Paradox of post. First of all I want to thank you for putting such an unique take on the situation at hand. How were parlayed that Brussels attacks and the crucifixion at the same time is a thought of the God for sure and for certain. The term why have you forsaken me music valid question. I want to share with you my thoughts on what I think happened that fateful day of the crucifixion. It is believed that God himself had to shut his eyes turn his back and drown out the sound of his son’s voice crying out in agony It is believed that if he had not done that then God would have come down in ferocious anger and destroyed mankind for what they’ve done to his son. It’s a blessing he did not because because now we as Christians have Redemption through his blood and that’s why at the end the crucifixion Jesus spoke these words forgive them Father for they know not what they do and it is finished meaning the Plan of Salvation is completely finished that’s why it is believed that when Christ died on calvary’s Hill God gave all of his love to mankind and if seniors don’t accept Calvary then there hope looks bleak
Thank you so much. You’re right- God gave absolutely all his love. What an incredible act. Thanks for stopping by!
Reblogged this on BLUE SUN and commented:
Love comes in many ways, softly like the fog or like awakening to cymbals in the morning, but however it comes, BBB says it so well, because no matter how love comes to you, THIS is how it should be.
Thank you so much for the reblog! It means a lot xox
Amen! You have more self worth than a lot of women out there. It’s funny… I was thinking the same thing “…in love with 2 women, REALLY?”
Hahah thanks so much! Yeah it’s pretty crazy…even for reality tv! Thanks for stopping by xox hugs!
Only date a potential mate? 🙂
Amen to that!! ☺️☺️☺️
Haha thaaaaaanks:) ❤️❤️❤️ glad you stopped by! Xox
Yes you do not want a Ben. I don’t like judgemental people but on this guy I have to call it. We have too many men out there talking about their faith on one side of their mouth and sleeping with three girls and falling in love with two from the other! What kind of message is that for young women looking for Christian guys. Steer clear. We are called to separate from the world, In the world but not a part of it. Christians are people who make big mistakes but I always question their faith when it’s not aligning itself with hoe you live. The most important is you live not what you say….right Ben? This guy you seek is there. Trust me! And he will love all of you.
***how not hoe…I guess that was kind of a mistake 😉
Hahaha no worries! Ironic mistake:) made me chuckle a little bit hehe
Hey Leigh! Thanks for this…I know I fee you. I never want to say anything bad about anyone but this was extreme. Thank you–yes I trust that God has just the right man out there for me:) thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox
I don’t watch The Bachelor because it makes me feel inadequate as a man compared to Ben in the eyes of the world. But I’m glad to see people like you who is able to see love beyond the eyes. I myself am still looking for my future wife who will love me beyond my imperfections and vice versa. Prayers assured to you, my fellow Catholic 🙂
Hey there friend. Thanks for sharing this. Yes, there is definitely the right girl out there for you. God preparing her. Hugs and love to you xox
Preach this message loudly and clearly from whatever rooftop you can. Spot on!
Hey Lance! Aw thank you so much! That really means a lot! Hugs xox
Preach it, girl! One thing that I had to learn before God gave me the man of my dreams is that I am worth loving. It’s 100% true! And so are you. I prayed and prayed for my husband, what I wanted him to be like, what special character qualities I wanted him to have. And all the time I was praying for a Godly man who loves the Lord, my family was saying “Your standards are too high. You are going to have to lower your standards, or you’ll never get married.” Well, I didn’t lower my standards. I prayed, I delighted myself in the Lord, and HE gave me the desires of my heart. My husband met all of my standards (which I based around the Bible) and even more! Don’t quit praying for that man! God is faithful, and will deliver like no other. He knows what He’s doing, and in His time, He will give you the desires of your heart. 🙂 Keep pressing on, girl! God bless!
Oh my gosh thank you so much for such encouraging words. That means so much. I’m so glad you found your husband. God is so good! Hugs and love to you xox
So true! I really enjoyed your post. Still looking for a future husband like that! It is so hard to ignore the outside and really look in the inside. I admit, after seeing Ben on all those magazines and watching his love stories, it hit me as well that I do not want to be with a man like that! xox SS
Hey there! Thank you so much! You’re right– there’s a man out there who will cherish and protect your heart. We’ve just gotta keep trusting! Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love dox
Aaahhhhhh! This was certainly a breath of fresh air. It’s encouraging to see this amazing journey you’re on!
Aw thank you so much! So glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox
I liked the post. Really. And i think we all should abide by it.
However, I also cannot help but notice that such “competition” happens every single day, and more commonly than we think it happens. When men and women fall for or seduce people with boyfriends / girlfriends / spouses.
Such a warped world we live in. And I, too, realize that I am not immune to its… perverseness.
God have mercy on us all!
God keep you safe, and keep you strong!
Thank you so much! You’re right-competition is not just on reality tv. Sad reality. But God is good and we can place our trust in him. Thanks for stopping by! Hugs xox
[…] Source: A Heart Worth Protecting […]
Thank you so much for the reblog! It means a lot! Hugs cox
Good for you! I think a lot of us get caught up in the Hollywood versions of what relationships are or should be. You’re recognizing the flaws in those “fairytales” and loving and trusting yourself enough to say “I know what I am worth and will accept no less than what I deserve.” Best of luck as you continue this journey of self growth and finding love. xxx
Thank you so much! You’re right–Hollywood relationships are not real life. Thanks for stopping by and for this encouragement. Hugs and love xox
You just nailed it! Thank you SO much for your keen analysis of all the “Bens” of the world! If by the grace of God there is someone “out there” for me, I want in her precisely what you’re looking for in your companion-to-be … no “Bens” or “Benettes” allowed! lol Again, great post! 😉
Thank you so much! hehe benettes, that’s funny! thanks for stopping by! hugs to you xox
Fear not. The life of hard knocks has taught me that the good looks and charisma packages usually come with more trouble than they are worth. Take time – always take time – and find out where the true jewels are hidden. Your inner guidance is leading you correctly – give thanks for that!
Thanks for this beautiful reflection. Yes, taking time is definitely important! thanks for stopping by! hugs xox
Very well-said. We have two daughters, 23 and 26, and I would NEVER want that kind of man for either of them. I want for them both, a young man who loves the Lord with all his heart, then loves her with the pure, selfless love only He can give.
Definitely not a Ben.
Thank you so much! yeah, Loving the Lord is such an important quality in a mate. thanks for stopping by! hugs xox
This is PERFECT! Although my husbands name is Ben,he is not like that Ben lol! I prayed fervently for my husband before I met him and when he came along he was the first guy I didn’t feel like I had to impress or be in competition with other girls with. He truly pursued my heart and God truly blessed me with him! enjoy being single however, it’s the time God is preparing you for your future husband and it is oh so sweet! Thank you for a wonderful read 🙂
Hi Ashley Mae! Aw, thank you so much! Haha, yay for a solid Ben! 🙂 That’s so wonderful! your story gives me hope 🙂 so happy for you. yes, god is good. thanks for stopping by! hugs xox
I’m usually all for the entire; as long as everyone are adults and it’s consensual deal, so polygamy is not a bad word or deed in my book, but true polygamy usually involves everyone wanting to be a part of life with everyone – this kind of thing is what really screws up love for so many people, love might be a battle, but it sure as sunshine ain’t no competition. You fight to stay together, you fight your battles together, you patch each other up, but when you have to PROVE which one DESERVES love, that just cheapens everything human beings can create between them.
Thank you for this perspective. I agree — Competing for love is definitely not something to aspire to. Love should not have to be proven. thanks for topping by! hugs and love xox
I like your post BBB. I’ve never seen the Bachelor or Bachelorette shows because I just can’t … I get embarrassed for the participants.
I get that networks have to provide content. But to force feed us fake fairytale is reprehensible. Not that the ‘real’ fairytale isn’t also made up, it’s that we know it is and don’t expect it to become real. Shows like this try to use fairytale magic to make their fake fairytale into a reality-tale show. (I hope that is understood better than the way I just wrote it.)
I don’t know you, of course, but I’m going to guess that I’m old enough to be your grandfather. What I like most about your posts is the maturity in your voice for someone, I believe, to be so young. Your cadence and language and phraseology, etc., all point to you being young. But when they are combined and printed here they equal a sum greater – more mature – than the component parts. You do good.
Hi there friend, wow thank you for such kind words. It really means a lot 🙂 Yeah, the fairytale they try to portray on tv is really no fairytale at all. Same with romantic comedy movies….real love takes hard work and commitment. not just background music and a good story line. thanks for stopping by and for this great perspective. hugs xox
Very well said and thanks for sharing. I agree! 🙂
Thank you so much! that really means a lot! hugs and love xox
Wish I could give you a hug! Stunning – don’t watch the show- but as usual love your style and the wee surprising twist. Listen, your heart is precious and what you see on the box…well. Stick with what is in your heart. Remember, you should know beautybeyondbones that beauty is beyond jawlines, beauty spots or high cheek bones. The beauty of love is the contentment the heart feels in the silence of togetherness. God Bless
Aw, thank you so much! I appreciate it! wow what beautiful words you speak. the silence of togetherness…what an inspiring thought! so glad you stopped by! hugs xox
Pleasure. Take Care & God Bless
Oh your post gave me ‘Godbumps’! You know…when the Spirit just reached in and says “Here, listen” and you just do. Thank you love.
Godbumps 🙂 hehe thank you so much! that really means a lot! thanks for stopping by xox
I love the Corinthians quote…thanks again
Hey Mike! thank you so much! that really means a lot. glad you enjoyed it! hugs xox
Love it beauty beyond that is what women need to appreciate their God self their princessness I follow I think the girls and ladies will get something worthwhile
Thank you so much! i really appreciate your encouragement. i hope so! thanks for stopping by! xox
Yes the amigo Dei of women is such a beautiful contrast to the male
How people, even moreso of Christians, get hung up on looks still baffles me. There are millions of physically attractive choices — though I am partial to the idea of soulmates — for either gender, but scarce few truly beautiful individuals. Time shall render the former irrelevant and prove the latter in compare. But surely enough, you will never see an ‘8’, or ‘lower’, on The Bachelor.
We all want our love to be a fairytale. Though, I must advise giving up on reliving the fairytales of childhood. They are not ours to relive. Love, true love, — and here I perhaps find madness mine more than ever — writes its own fairytale. Cinderella did not hope to be Juliette, Snow White to be Cinderella. And for my part, I shall don no princely armor but my own.
Hah. White knight… And foolishly, for ‘white knight’ is now a term of derision where once it stood for a man dedicated to goodness and righteousness and the love of one woman, to protect and care for her above all else save faith, not because she is incapable but because he loves her more than himself. Foolishness and madness, I know, but both accompany love just the same. When they have gone, love abides.
What love is worth having should inform our hearts of what love is not worth having. The entire parade and premise that a man should simply choose a woman, as though she were a grocery item to check off the list (and vice-versa), is not love, not a love worth having. If we believe that God has a plan for our lives, what choices are to be made? There is but one: do we follow His plan or choose our own way? I refuse to believe that God’s plan for our lives does not include a future spouse.
Thank you so much for this beautiful reflection. I definitely agree– i believe whole-heartedly that God is preparing my husband’s heart right now and that he has someone picked out just for me. I have to rest in that hope. thanks for taking the time to read! hugs xox
First of all, thank you for checking out my blog and liking one of my posts 🙂 You are an excellent writer, and I love how you continue to cling to God through your battles. I’ve read some of your posts and there were great lessons taught. God bless!
Thanks! I really appreciate that. Yes, God is good and I owe him my life. Thanks for stopping by! I look forward to reading more from you! xox
I’m so glad I found your blog because I feel the exact same way. Except I’m not able to watch the Bachelor or Bachelorette type shows because I don’t know how you can fall in love with someone in a competition. I’m very competitive and very good at reading people so I see me using that to my advantage just to get ahead in the game. That’s not how I want to love. Another great post 🙂
Hi Cora! Aw, thank you so much! yeah, the premise of the show is very peculiar to say the least! you’re right — love is more special that any reality tv show. thanks for stopping by! hugs and love xox
I hope and pray that you find that man you deserve! They are out there, and they struggle to find the woman they deserve too. Someone like you.
I wish you good luck in your search, and caution to avoid what feels wrong.
Thank you so much, Havoc! That really means a lot. I trust that he’s out there, I just need patience. Thanks for stopping by! hugs xox
Brilliantly put! If you are forced to compete for someone’s love then it’s just a game to them . Been there learned the hard way. Loved reading it ! 😘
Thank you so much! That really means a lot. Yeah, competition, especially over the heart, leads to nothing good. thanks for stopping by! hugs and love to you xo
Thanks for discovering my blog and liking my post first! I can tell I’m going to enjoy your posts 🙂 xx
I don’t watch TV these days but wow that’s sad that he likes two women at the same time…
Hi SlimJim! yeah, it was quite sad. reality tv…ugh. thanks for stopping by! hugs and love xox
Love is patient my friend! Hold on to that 🙂
Thanks Nathanael, you’re right. I appreciate that:) hugs xox
Once more, your wisdom shines. I believe that God is creating something amazing for you! He is already making something beautiful in you and through you. Thank you for sharing your journey toward open-heartedness with the world. It’s a very vulnerable position to be in, and it gives me courage to face my vulnerabilities, too. Thank you! ❤️
Hey Lulu! Aw thank you so much friend. God is so good, I believe he is too! I just have to muster some patience! And gosh, what a kind thing to say. You just made my day ☺️ I’m so glad our paths crossed:) sending a big hug Xoxox
Great post, love is a scary thing sometimes. I was blessed to meet my wife when I did when my life was getting ready to nose dive. You seem like a very smart woman, just be careful out there. Just because a man goes to church or says he believes doesn’t mean he is a Godly man, pray, pray, pray.
Hey Scruffy! You’re right-definitely scary at times. And very true: I’ve gotta kee my eyes wide open. Thanks for the encouragement friend! Hugs! Have a great weekend!
Lovely: so right, Hollywood romance is just a story for relaxing with … Hope you find your man, and when you do, don’t expect perfection always (me, married 41 years, survived, but the ups and downs will always come to all of us – difficulties to share – kids to raise – kids can break you 2 hearts differently … they don’t mean to … don’t expect perfection, but do choose a soul mate not just a good-looker! You are on the right lines here. Faithfulness really counts. Soulmates are there for the long haul. Love your brave blog.
Hi Mari! Aw thank you for this beautiful response. Youre right- just like I can’t expect perfection from myself, I can’t expect it in another person either. But faithfulness is key☺️ wow 41 years-what an inspiration! Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox
Good post….trying to wrap my head around the concept of “Christian…sleeps with 3 different women three nights in a row…(on a national stage)”…..nah, can’t do it bro. He’s no Christian. He disqualified himself from that title. The apostle Paul would have cast him out of the community.
Very true, Christianity isn’t a title, it’s a lifestyle.
Hi there! You are so so right. You gotta walk the talk 🙂 thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love to you xox
Hi David! Thank you so much. I know–but of a head-scratcher there! Haha leave it to Paul…☺️ thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox
I was sitting here thinking the same thing *handclaps* Totally right on!! †
Thank you so much! ☺️☺️ glad you stopped by! Hugs xox
All I have to say is AMEN.
Hey Corrie! Oh thank you so much! ☺️☺️☺️ hugs to you friend! Have a great weekend xox
Whoop! Whoop! = )
Thanks Tammy:) I appreciate it! Hugs to you xox
Think about how long the people of God had to wait for a Savior. Trust in God, have patience, increase your faith and the gift will be abundant and amazing!!
Thank you so much for this beautiful perspective. You’re right. Patience is key! Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox
A lovely reflection. Powerful. Poignant.
I appreciate your willingness to watch “The Bachelor.” It’s never drawn my attention, in large part because it portrays (advertises? sells?) a love so steeped in sentimentality that I find it unreal (although, I confess, there are times when I wish such a love was real, and, thus, attainable).
I also appreciate, indeed, find myself grateful to you for your reflection on a love that is true and honorable, noble and sustainable that reflects what Paul wrote in his great paean to love, 1 Corinthians 13.
My hope and prayer is that you, in the grace of your continued recovery and openness to love – to loving and to being loved, find your un-or-non-Ben. Trusting God is working His purpose out in your life,
Love and peace,
Hey Paul! Thank you so much! I really appreciate your encouragement. You speak so much wisdom. Yes, God is good and has a plan for my life and I have to trust that he will bring the right man into my life at the right time. Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox
A woman who understands her true value will not throw herself at just any man. You may have doubted your worth in the past, but the fact that you are willing to wait for a man who deserves you is beautiful and it shows how far you have come on your journey! Blessings!
Aw thank you so much:) I appreciate your kind words. Yes, it has been a journey, but one that I am grateful for:) sending love and hugs! Thanks for stopping by! Cox
Oh my!! Girl, you hit it right on the head!!
I was sitting here, at the first of this, shaking my head going, “No Ben for me…” (I’m not a fan of the Bachelor 😛 Hehe)
So, when the second part of this writing came into view I was cheering, and clapping along!!
So precious the gift God gave us to show love, and may we hold it dear <3
Really touching post my friend *handclaps*
Thank you so much MK! That really means a lot. Yes God is good and desires so much more than that for us 🙂 thanks for stopping by! Hugs xox
Aw, most welcome!! 😀
Amen, so true! <3
Thank you for replying! *Blessings*
I’m rooting for you …indeed your heart is worth protecting Proverbs 4:23 Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. !! God will send your real life better than Ben keep trusting him….I’m hoping for mine too 🙂
Aw thank you so much! That means so much:) I love that verse❤️ oh yes, God has partners he’s preparing right now–for both you and I:) thanks for reading!
Marriage ought to be a one time thing. Eyes must be wide opened in order not to fall into terribly wrong hands. Wait, and the right Christ-like person will come knocking. Thank God that, ultimately, our eternal GROOM will come for us to love us forever and a day.
Thank you so much for this encouragement. You speak so much wisdom. Amen to that. God is good and His timing is perfect! Thanks for stopping by! Hugs xox
Really enjoyed your view on the bachelor and your heart’s worth. I personally don’t watch any reality shows especially the bachelor for the same reasons. I’m praying for you!
Hi Maria, thank you so much for this! I appreciate the prayers too☺️ sending hugs and love xox
Finally, a woman that wants a guy who is a good guy, devoted and isn’t a Romeo that can get a girl at the drop of a hat!! Problem? I’m going on 58 years old…sorry!!
Haha glad to know they’re out there! Thanks for stopping by!
[…] You deserve somebody’s single-minded love and care. […]
Thanks so much for the shout out! Hugs and love xox
Great post 🙂 I never watched the show to be honest, but then again I am a guy 🙂 The problem with these type of shows is that even If one of the contestants is a candidate with high fiber morale, the problem is he/she has agreed to participate in a show where you have to date different people at the same time and one just does not do that. I love it that you say that your heart is worth protecting and that is a promise that nobody should walk out on 🙂 Anyway, keep up the great work as always 🙂 P.S. did you have a great St. Patrick’s day? 🙂
Thanks John! Hah yeah I don’t blame you:) you hit the nail on the head–the fact is, they signed up for it :/ thanks! Yes I did! I went out with friends and had too much fun 🙂 what about you??
We watched Hallmark channel 🙂 They had some St. Patrick’s day films on 🙂 For dinner, we had cornbeef and cabbage 🙂 Anyway, I hope you enjoy your weekend and keep up the great work as always 🙂
Oh the hallmark channel. How I love thee:) sounds like a great evening! Xox
I don’t really watch the bachelorette or the bachelor for that matter. Your post had me captured in each and every word. I am lucky enough to have found the type of man you described…Unlike Ben! I hope that every woman finds a man like this at least once in their life even if they didn’t realize it at the time. This is a man worth keeping and a man worth holding on for. I absolutely love your post and can’t wait to read the next one!
Hi ROS Mom! Aw thank you so much:) and congrats on that! So happy that you’ve found a non-Ben 🙂 I don’t mean to give Ben a bad wrap…he’s not a bad guy, just questionable choices on national tv, that’s all! 😂 but you speak a lot of wisdom. Thanks for sharing ☺️ sending love and hugs! Have a great weekend!
I agree! From how you described him, he sounds like an amazing guy, but there is no way I would be able to be with someone like Ben if he was still in love with another woman as well. What if he later on questions his decision? He sounds great but I would have chosen neither! I know that may not be an option on the show but I would rather be 100% committed to a man than have split feelings. I think I actually did watch one episode out of curiosity. While I found him charming and all that you said to describe him, I can also understand how it was so hard for him to make the decision! Either way it is better to be 100% sure and not risk having mixed feelings and eventually change your mind. (Not saying he will, but it’s a possibility!)
Totally am with you! That would haunt me too. You’re right-marriage is an all-in, 100% commitment. Hugs xoxo
I’m so glad you understand me! Marriage is all in! 🙂 Can’t wait for your next post! Hugs back! XOXO
I had to stop watching a few seasons ago for those exact reasons. Promoting the idea that we need to compete for a man’s affections whilst he is with several over ladies became too much to stomach.
Hi Melissa! You’re right-true love is not a competition. Thanks for sharing this:) have a lovely weekend! Hugs and love xox
☺️☺️thank you so much! Glad you stopped by! Xox
” I have faith that God is forming the heart of my future husband”
Stay right there! That’s the belief that will pay.
Hi friend! Aw thank you so much:) that really means a lot☺️ God is good! And I will trust him. Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox
BBB, again a great post! You are so right that the Bachelor is just a show and our hearts are precious and worth guarding. 1 Samuel 16:7 says But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” A man might “look” handsome, but is he really handsome in the eyes of God? That’s the question I ask myself when I get approached by people to be friends or whatnot because I’ve been fooled so many times before
Hi Lyndsay, thank you so much for this response. You’re so right. And I love that passage! Thank you for sharing. You’re right–we need to see eachother through the eyes of God. Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox
“We can even forget the fact that Ben sleeps with three different women, three nights in a row.” Eww…!!! I don’t forget that. I watched the very first three seasons of that show and was rolling my eyes by the end of the 3rd one. True and real love is Nothing like that show. Sorry to offend any fans, I just think that show makes women look needy and pathetic. You are right that you deserve more than that – all that is, is smoke and mirrors and like you said, dramatic and clever editing.
Hi friend! I hear you. The show is definitely NOT what real love is. Smoke and mirrors is a great way to put it. Thanks for this great perspective. Hugs and love xox
Same back to you! xo
Beautiful insight and very well written. The Bachelor always bothered me because of the competition and the fact that the women are fighting for someone they know is probably *read definitely* sleeping with other people while professing their love. I am so lucky in my life to have found a husband who I trust with my whole heart. I know that God is preparing the person who deserves you as well.
Thank you so much Kelli:) that’s so awesome that you’ve found the man God prepared for you! I definitely trust that He’s got a man for me as well God is good! I just have to be patient. Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox
That is where a lot of people go wrong is that they will let one person treat them like trash because they love him/her or he/she is the one. You are right – the fabled “one” would not treat you as second best or be trying you out whilst also sampling the goods of others.
You are right to make sure that you are with someone who values you for who you are. There’s a song that was number one in the UK a number of years ago by Fairground Attraction – the chorus had the lines “Too many people take second best, but I won’t take anything less.”
Hi Harry, thanks for this. Yeah, I’ll be patient and wait for the one that treats me as I should. Wow what a profound song lyric! I’ll have to look that song up! Thanks for stopping by! Have an awesome rest of your weekend! Xox
It’s called Perfect. I’ve just found a link about it on Wikipedia for you – https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Perfect_(Fairground_Attraction_song)
Thank you!! ☺️☺️
My mother always said it was of utmost importance to be in prayer for a heart of wisdom and understanding. Looks like you are working this out and walking with a discerning spirit. You are wise to be thinking and waiting for an honourable man full if integrity and character.
Thank you so much:) that means a lot. Yes, I trust that God has him out there. I just need to be patient! (And have my eyes open!) haha thanks for stopping by! Hugs xox
LOVE this! I was just telling my best friend the other day I want a man who only wants me! Not two girls! Keep your head up! You’ll find love! 🙂
Hi there Nicole! Thank you so much:) amen–definitely NOT! ☺️ thanks for stopping by! hugs and love to you! xoxo
I am reminded of a young friend I had in youth group. She stayed single and dated just a few times. Finally she was working at an art show and this lady suggested meeting her son who had also stayed out of the dating scene. Reluctantly she agreed and met the young man. He did ask her out and she was upfront with him and said ” I have given my heart to Jesus so if you want it you will have to get it from Him”. I thought that was such an amazing response and it was if fact true. They have married and she is due to have their first child. It appeared that love had passed them by but the wait for these two have been worth it.
What a beautiful story. thank you for sharing this. just another example of how God has a good and perfect plan for each and every one of us…and in His own time! thanks for stopping by! hugs xox
You took the thoughts straight outta my head girl and I love how you went about it.. keep it up 🙂
Aw thank you so much Colleen! That really means a lot! So glad you stopped by! Hugs and love to you xox
Hello my beautiful friend it has been a while a lot of things have been happening and mostly not good so haven’t felt up to getting in touch x. I even struggled in worship today I have had issues with another person for a few days and the best way I felt with dealing with it was to just vent my anger and frustrations at them, I know not the most helpful of things to do but in fact it did help to ease my my mind quite alot. I know I am having to put it down to experience and learn from it but we aren’t perfect no matter how hard we try. I am in the early days of my relationship with Jesus and learn to release that part of my behaviour x
Hi Benjamin! I hope you’re doing okay:) I’ll say an extra prayer for you. You’re right-we’re not perfect, nor are we expected to be. Jesus loves us — even the imperfect parts. Thanks for stopping by. Hugs xox
Thank you for your prayer my wonderful friend it really helped and I felt it stirring my heart <3. An amazing thing happened today with bible study we were talking about the Holy Spirit and I got prayed for and I got filled with the holy spirit it was so amazing <3 😀 xx
I know I have had been give the spirit to stir my heart when i gave my life to Jesus but this was a totally different feeling, started to pray in tongues <3
Wow. That is incredible!
Reblogged this on wwwpalfitness.
Thanks so much for the reblog! Hope you’re having a great weekend!
You’re welcome. 🙂
👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 I’ve heard of the show through my friends but never seen it.
I so agree with you on the description of the future husband. Opening up our hearts=scary.
Patiently waiting=frustrating at times.
But choosing wisely=totally worth it.
Why? Because WE are worth it!!!
Always enjoy reading your blogs 🙂
Thanks again Marisol! You are so spot on! We ARE worth it! Woo! Thanks again for stopping by! Hope you have a beautiful week! Xox
Thank you! Hope your week goes the same!!
beautiful , wise words xx
Aw thank you so much! I appreciate that a lot. Sending hugs and love xox
Your heart is worth protecting and it’s such a fine balance between exposing it and over protecting it. Worth the risk though. It’s a fab blog recommended by a friend xx
Thank you so much Jacqui! You’re so right. A fine balance indeed. Thank you for stopping by! Hugs and love! Xox
Hello, and very good post! I noticed that you liked my very first blog post from Friday (thanks a lot for that, btw!), but as I have not been on WP for very long, I’m curious how/where you found it? Thanks for the info! I’m looking forward to another post this week!
Hello, and very good post! I got an email that you liked my very first blog post the other day (thanks a lot for that!), but I’m curious, as I don’t have much experience with WP thus far, how and where you found my blog and all that jazz. Thanks in advance for the info! Chris
Hi there! Thanks so much for stopping by!! Yes, it came up in my WP feed and I decided to check it out! Looking forward to more! Xx
awesome! that’s so cool…perhaps it was the mental health tags or whatnot. It’s intended to focus on healing from childhood trauma, alcohol abuse of a parent and/or yourself and methods to help that happen. Thanks again!
YEEESSSS! Thank you for sharing your heart and for BRINGING TRUTH! So encouraging. Our hearts ARE the King’s and so so precious. Thank you.
Hi AnnieMae! Aw thank you so much for such kind and encouraging words! That means so much:) amen to that! Our hearts are SO precious! Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox
I admire your faith & your originality! We’ve got some amazing Prince Charmings coming our way! God’s way only!!
Hi there friend! O thank you so much! Amen to that! Prince charmings for sure! Now just for some patience 🙄😂 thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love to you xoxo
I’m still with you, little one. You still have your head on straight; good for you. Stay with Jesus and he will direct your path.
Hi Oneta! Aw thank you so much☺️☺️☺️ amen to that. He is the ultimate Guide☺️ thanks for your friendship. It means the world❤️ hugs and love to you xox
So difficult to wait for the right one. Living in a small town sort of forces me to do that though. Well done, a really well-written, thoughtful piece that made me think.
You’re so right! Thank you so much:) that really means a lot. Hugs and love! Xox
Thank you for sharing this post. You wrote so candidly, and reminded me of some very important truths about love and how God desires for our interpersonal relationships to model His love for/relationships with us.
Also, I wish you continued strength on your recovery journey. Thank you for sharing your experiences to encourage others.
Thank you so much. I really appreciate he encouragement and support:) yes, God does desire is to live and dwell in His love for us. Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox
I love this post! I feel the exact same way about the Bachelor. Even though I love watching it and loved Ben, I would never want to be a girl on that show! I want a man who wants me, pursues me, and fights for my heart…and doesn’t kiss a bunch of other girls.
Thank you so much! I hear. You. Oh my gosh same. I love the show but would never be on it either. We deserve to be the only one! Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox
Regarding your post about the television show, “The Bachelor”. I’ve never seen the show. Though I have watched a couple of the other ‘reality’ shows once in a while. I don’t see ‘much’ reality in them (the shows usually flaunt excessive ‘money’ living), but I like the shows because they allow you to “see” interactions between the people. Sometimes it’s like watching ‘life experience’. Whether one has money or not, sometimes experiences can be quite similar when you really think about it. Usually those shows point out (accidentally) how teamwork works and how gossip doesn’t work, in real life. The shows seem to be like huge soap operas but with ‘real people’ (whom the producers have chosen to act out their stories). For me, “The Bachelor” is probably the scariest of all the reality shows in that people are actually trying to either sell or buy love, selling or buying some type of personal commitment, rather than just living life and being more real about relationships. And yes, that’s where the Bible comes in handy. In that one Book, there are great ‘life’ instructions, that, when followed, do make life happier, easier and more creative, constructive and fruitful. The instructions are embedded throughout the Book, just waiting for someone to have time to read them.
Thank you so much for this great reflection. You’re right-“selling” love is a scary thing. We’ve got to cling to the truth. Thanks for stopping by! Hugs xox
[…] shares wonderful positive messages about her day to day life. I especially liked her post about the bachelor. She fills her blogs with humorous images as well as thoughtful ones (like the ones in Et Tu […]
Thank you so much for the reblog! Hugs xox
Reblogged this on A Response and commented:
Good insight on a show that enraptures the female heart, will simultaneously and inherently letting it down.
Thank you so much for the reblog! Hugs and love xox
This is beautiful and very inspiring! Thank you!
Thank you so much Bree! So glad you enjoyed it! Hugs and love xox
[…] A Heart Worth Protecting by BeautyBeyondBones […]
Thank you so much for the shout out! Hope you have a great day!
[…] You deserve somebody’s single-minded love and care. […]
Thank you so much for the shout out! Hope you’re having s great night! Hugs xox
This was beautiful. I love your perspective!
Thank you so much Allie! I appreciate your kindness:) hugs and love xox
Right back at ya!!
WHOAA! Your post was just wow! Sometimes I wonder if my future husband too would be praying for me at that same time when I’m praying for him! Haha, it’s a crazy thought. But girl, those desires in you were planted by the King himself and I’m sure He’ll give the best to His princess cause you deserve it all. Much love and prayers! God bless!
Aw Beulah, thank you so much for this beautiful response. Amen to that. God has a plan for you and I that is good! Thanks for the encouragement. Husband love xox
Aww! That’s true. Our God chosen prince Charmings are on their way for us. <3 Thank you! God bless you heaps to be a blessing to a zillion! And do stop by to visit my blog, I just started it recently. Hugs! <3
“And I have faith that God is forming the heart of my future husband to be just that.” That line totally struck me. On behalf of all the guys out there who are being formed for their lady in waiting, I wanna say: I’m sorry we can take so long to be ready! But, like you say: it’s better to wait for the right one who KNOWS what’s right, then jumping for the first one who happens to show interest :/ God’ll provide. Some of us just take a little longer than others to be up to snuff 😛
Thank you so much for these encouraging words! Amen to that… God will provide. Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox
Wow! I enjoyed this.
Thanks! ❤️❤️❤️that makes me so happy! Hope you have a great night xox and thanks for reading my posts tonight! Xox
Aww I really loved reading this post. I am a bit late commenting Lol! It was so encouraging. Thank you xx. I will be following your blog . Please do check mine out also for encouragement xxx
Hey friend! Aw thanks:) you’re never too late! ☺️ I really appreciate your kind words! I’ll definitely check out your blog! Hugs and love xox
[…] Because my actions have finally backed up my beliefs. I stood up for myself and put my money where my mouth is. And if I lose this project, then so be it. Because at the end of the day, my self-worth and self-dignity — everything I’ve worked so hard to solidify in my 8 years of recovery – those things are more valuable than this project. Those things are worth protecting. […]
Thanks so much for the link up! Big hugs xox
[…] Except from BeautyBeyondBones (BBB) […]
[…] You deserve somebody’s single-minded love and care. […]