Life’s Souvenirs

You know you’re becoming an adult when you get excited about washing your mattress pad…

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I was chuckling to myself, thinking about that. I was vacuuming and listening to a podcast on world events, waiting for my sheets to finish in the dryer and I realized — it’s taken me a while, but I’m actually growing up.

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And, I realized that there are definitely some things I know now, that have changed who I am and how I live my life, for the better.

And not that I can take credit for any of these. Most are either taught from my beautiful mother, or the humiliating/devastating result of trial and [critical] error.

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1. Invest your time in the people who matter to you.

Your actions speak a lot louder than your words, and how you spend your free time is a big indicator to what and who you value. And at the end of the day, your “true blue” friends are going to mean a lot more than any loud and obscure party. So choose accordingly.

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2. If someone takes the time to leave you a voicemail, listen, and call them back.

Even if it’s just a text reply, RESPOND. I spent years and years during my anorexia just not picking up the phone and not returning the calls and texts from my friends. They’re reaching out because they care about you. But if you don’t reciprocate, the rejection will eventually wear on them, and they will just stop trying. Friendships and relationships matter.

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3. If people matter to you, let them know.

I have lived by the rule that a lady should never show her cards and keep her heart close to her chest. But you know what? That has gotten me nowhere. And in one weekend here, I have interacted with three separate men, all of whom had feelings for me during different periods of life, and I never let them know that I too, felt the same. And you know what? They are now all happily in relationships, and there’s nothing I can do about it.

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4. There is no better accessory than confidence.

If you feel good about yourself, then other people will too. Period.

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5. Say “yes” more often.

I’ve learned that if you really want to start living, you need to say, yes – Incorporate it into your vocabulary. Embrace the lifestyle that it produces, and don’t look back.

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6. Listen to your gut.

Here’s the thing: some people call it intuition, some people call it your conscience, some people call it a gut feeling, but I’m here to tell you…it’s the Holy Spirit’s nudging. Cheesy, sure. Accurate? Absolutely. You’ll know you’re doing the right thing because you feel at peace. That’s the Spirit moving in your heart. Listen. And if you’re feeling restless, that’s a big ol’ Red Flag, and probably something should change.

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Which is why, I’m actually writing this from Ohio. 

Surprise!

Yes, I actually decided to come home for a little bit while my mom gets a heart procedure done.

Ever since her stroke back in December, I’ve adhered to that final advice, following the peace. But when I was back in NYC, let’s just say I was a tinderbox of emotion the whole time. It was as though I were there in body only…my heart and spirit were back in Ohio with my mom.

So I’m going to be home for a few weeks and be with her while she’s recovering and adjusting to her new post-stroke normal.

It turns out, that we really only get one chance in life. One go around the sun. And the older I get, the more I’m realizing that there are actually, very few things that truly matter…and probably the biggest of these is family.

So there you go…

If you need me, I’ll be basking in this glorious peace.

What are some of the best “Life Souvenirs”  you’ve picked up along the way?

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beautybeyondbones

BBB: Because we're all recovering from something. // For speaking/business inquiries: beautybeyondbones@yahoo.com

274 thoughts on “Life’s Souvenirs

  1. Great list. Lots of this stuff is what our grandparents would call “normal behavior” that had sadly been lost nowadays.

    Much of modern life seems like we’re trying desperately to reclaim the pieces of tradition that are sorely lacking in our lives.

    Wow, this got melancholy fast! And all I wanted to say was, “Great post!”

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I actually just posted on FB the other day the question about who I was in the mirror because I don’t recognise myself.

    So, I just thought of something…..
    I’m growing plants,
    I’m doing crafts,
    I’m writing a well accepted Christian Blog,
    I’m pushing myself to go outside my comfort zone moving out of NC….
    I still masquerade as a guy in a green hood, mask and light sabers,
    But really, I don’t recognize myself in the mirror, who is that guy?

    I have never in my life owned plants, done crafty things on my own, been one to write like I do now.
    I’ve always been one to listen and call people back. I’ve had too many near death experiences to realize time is short. But this was beautifully written as always! It’s such a joy to read your posts.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. As soppy as it sounds you are one treasure I value a lot, I look forward to the times we interact ❤ you mean more to me than I could ever tell you 😊 that smile! After the things you have been through that smile just shines through and hits my heart in the biggest way possible! It keeps me going so many days ❤

    Liked by 1 person

      1. No don’t blush 😂 make you’ll beam more cuteness at me 😂 how was your week?

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      2. I’m being serious! 😊 I feel God may still be speaking to you about Ohio ❤❤

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  4. Awesome post! Here are few lessons I imagine myself telling if I’m ever asked to give a commencement address at my alma mater.
    1. Don’t be generic. God made you unique and gave you unique gifts to offer the world. Offer them, and be proud.
    2. If you have enthusiasm for something, pursue it. The word enthusiasm literally means “breathing in God.” If you feel yourself breathing in God in any activity, that’s a big clue to your purpose in life.
    3. Follow a career path that allows you to focus on your strengths. Don’t follow a path that’s not right for you just because you think you can make a lot of money at it.
    4. Don’t try to change your basic nature. If you are extroverted, don’t force yourself to be an introvert. If you are introverted, don’t force yourself to be an extrovert. Both of them have their advantages. Whatever you are, do something that fits your personality rather than forcing yourself to change.
    5. Believe in yourself and believe in the Almighty One. Wait, shouldn’t believing in God come first? That’s what most religious people will tell you. What I’ve learned is, if you don’t believe in yourself, nothing else you believe in will have any power for you.
    6. Know yourself. If you don’t know who you are, what you believe in, what your unique gifts are, what your personality is, and what you have enthusiasm for, you won’t be able to follow points 1-5.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. This was a wonderful post. I used to be so afraid to express myself for fear of rejection. I wasted so much time being afraid that I missed out on receiving love. I’m still growing up in that area of my life, but the best souvenir I’ve received from being myself, is joy!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Hey Caralyn: After all these previous posts, there is basically nothing new to add, so I will just say, you are an awesome young lady, with a wise, intelligent, witty mind.
    There are two major obvious important aspects in your life: your love of God our Heavenly Father, and your love of His Son and our Saviour Jesus Christ, including your openness to speak freely of Jesus and what He means to you, as well as what He has done.
    Next, your love and devotion to your Mom and Dad. Reading what you write of them, your heart is seen by all, as warmth and love radiates from you, about them. I am certain that all others following you realize that also, and are blessed. I sure am.
    God’s Blessings Good Friend.
    Luv, 🌹😀🌹
    George

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Thank you again for sharing your heart with us. I hope you have a great time in Ohio and that you are a blessing to your dear Mom.I especially liked your idea of saying yes more. It is easier for me as a grandparent to say yes instead of always saying no.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I don’t need you. I don’t want you. But I do want to ask a question, if I may. Why did you turn to semi-weekly publishings? You did not start that way. As you say, we only have one life. I am only in it for the information.

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  9. I think your title fits perfectly. I think all you’ll ever be, a souvenir, nothing more. Like my Les Mis playbill that I threw away. Just wasn’t worth hanging on to. Good-bye.

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  10. The Holy Spirit leads us to growth in SO MANY WAYS, if we can only find the courage to listen and follow. And, even though that guidance will lead us into some rather uncomfortable spots at times, it’s always for our greater good – to help us learn something we really need to learn; to bring us in touch with someone we really need to know; to lead us to tremendous gifts that we would never find on our own; to move us out of our comfort zones, on to bigger & better things. I’d be lost without the Holy Spirit…I certainly couldn’t write the way I do without the Holy Spirit. I’m sure you feel the same way. Thank you for sharing this wisdom with the world! (And, enjoy your visit with your mom. If you’re anywhere close to Cincinnati, drop by the incredibly beautiful Old St. Mary’s Church for the Latin Mass on Sunday, & say “hi!”)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You’re so right! the Holy Spirit is our advocate, comforter, guide, peace, encourager — and how grateful am I 🙂 You’re right – we’ve got to find that courage to listen and follow. thanks for your kind words! hugs xox

      Liked by 1 person

  11. I’ve always loved…”Let there be peace on earth and let it begin with….ME!” Couldn’t help but hum this tune, while looking at the peace radiating from your photo! Hugs n’ sweet blessings!

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Hi Caralyn!
    I love your writing style and how you refer to life’s lessons as souvenirs. What a beautiful perspective :). Your post was just what I needed to see today and brought me a sense of peace. I have bounced around through many phases in my life. Throughout my youth I always wore my heart on my sleeve, but then I often got hurt or taken advantage of. In my early to mid twenties I became very guarded and was afraid to feel and be vulnerable. Then I went through a period of opening up to the wrong types of people and learned that we have to be selective about who we “let in.”
    Lately I have been a lot more careful about who I choose to spend my time with and it has made such a beautiful difference in my life.
    There is definitely an art to finding the balance.
    Thanks again for sharing your wisdom and beautiful insights. I am saying prayers for your mother and sending you great big *Hugs*

    ❤ Alana Xoxoxo.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Hey Caralyn, another fantastic post! Your honesty and your attitude are always refreshing. Reading this one today, I couldn’t help but think that maybe number 6 is part of the reason you didn’t open up to the guys you talk about in number 3 (if that makes sense). If they are all happily in relationships now, then maybe they weren’t the right guys for you, and the times you knew them in the past weren’t the right times for you to be finding your future husband. God works in amazing ways, and so often we get impatient but there is always a reason for the times of waiting. My wife did a sermon at church recently on Jeremiah 29:10-11. Verse 11 is a verse we are all familiar with (For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord etc.) but we always skip over verse 10 which says “his is what the Lord says: “When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will come to you and fulfill my good promise to bring you back to this place.” So yes God will prosper us etc, but in His time, because His time is perfect. I’m sure you’re not going to have to wait 70 years, but just think of the growth and learning you have done over recent years in your recovery and how that prepares you for a relationship in the future.
    Also, I was excited to read you are back in Ohio, that definitely seems like the place for you to be right now. I think God is going to do amazing things for you there!
    Hope that all makes sense! Keep doing what you’re doing, it’s awesome!
    Tim

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Tim! Thank you so much for this thoughtful response. I really appreciate your encouragement. You’re right – I think number 6 definitely played into number 3…that’s a great thought. And how true is that! God knows the end game and is going to work everything together for good. Sounds like a powerful sermon. Thanks for sharing that. Big hugs to you and yours xox

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  14. I can’t tell you how much I love this post. There’s so much truth in it, and the quotes and photos throughout it are BEAUTIFUL. YOU are beautiful. Never forget that.

    Life Souveniers that I’ve picked up:
    1. God loves you, and He’s always right by your side.
    2. Being different is not only okay, it is beautiful.
    3. Be unafraid to say the words that are on your heart. Doing so opens doors that will lead you to beautiful people and things.
    4. If someone means a lot to you, tell them.
    5. Pain makes you stronger.
    6. No dream is impossible.

    Hope you’re having a blessed weekend! Enjoy Ohio!

    Liked by 2 people

  15. Some life tips are: Accept Jesus as your Savior, love your enemies, respect everyone including the people that don’t like you, Make sure you treat everyone with kindness and love not hate, Accept people as they are and respect other people’s opinions even if you disagree.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Needed #3 for a reminder. I’m so bad at reaching out, keeping in touch, and making sure that people I care about know that I do.
    Praying for your mom and your whole family. God is sovereign!

    Liked by 1 person

  17. I was really enjoying your points when all of a sudden – bam!! – you’re back in Ohio! That’s fantastic. Your points are truth filled and they spoke to me. I like how they are “being” orientated rather than doing orientated; relational. I do have one concern… you still deal with voicemail?

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Thank you so much for this, it really resonated with me–especially your words about listening to the spirit. I’m a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, and I really resonated with that point–the Spirit speaks to each of us so individually, and I’ve been working really hard to listen to Him while starting a new job. Don’t worry if the answer is slow in coming on what you’re suppose to do, revelation is generally more of a “sunrise” thing than a “light switch” in my experience. Good luck in Ohio, I’m praying for you and your family!

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  19. I will add to your list, In addition to saying yes, do NOT be afraid to use the word No. There are just somethings that we all don’t want to do for one reason or another. But we are afraid of hurting someone’s feelings if we decline. Using both yes AND no as we feel fit can make our lives SO much easier!

    I know too many who say yes WAY too often as well as those who say NO. Use them both as needed and life will be MUCH better!

    Great post!

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Hi BBB,

    You post are good nuggets and reminders to treat everything and a blessing from the Lord. You also have some great gihfs. I think it so important to connect with people with humor as well. Life moments: Autumn and I waiting for lady bugs to land. Backyard camping. Sitting by a river with cold water and rocks, relaxing with others in silence. ( I am learning the beauty of silence or just listening as a talker.)

    Have a great week,

    Gary On Thu, Jun 15, 2017 at 4:02 PM BeautyBeyondBones wrote:

    > beautybeyondbones posted: “You know you’re becoming an adult when you get > excited about washing your mattress pad… I was chuckling to myself, > thinking about that. I was vacuuming and listening to a podcast on world > events, waiting for my sheets to finish in the dryer and I rea” >

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Gary! Aw, thanks. You’re really kind to say that. And what great memories! Yeah, listening can be really powerful. It lets the one you’re listening to really process and potentially have an epiphany. Sometimes the best conversations are when we don’t say anything at all, and just let the other person process and come to a realization all on their own. Sounds like some really precious moments in time 🙂 thanks for sharing that 🙂 big hugs xo

      Liked by 1 person

  21. Good word. From my own past experience I would include “love laughter and learn to cry.” I’ve always lived with a mindset that it laughter is better than crying. But obstructing the painful experience of tears will short-circuit your emotional balance. Don’t live in mourning but don’t be afraid to visit when the season calls for it.

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