Walking the Talk

I had a pretty unforgettable experience the other day.

It was a Friday afternoon. I had a free hour or so, which hardly ever happens, and so I thought I’d go to evening mass. And I decided to go to a church I had never been to before in midtown NYC.

Like I mentioned previously…I’m “Husband Hunting.”


Cue the hair and makeup team…


We’re all sitting in the basement of this little chapel, just a stone’s throw from Penn Station, and the gospel was on “Whatever you do to the least of these my brothers, you do to Me.” (Matt 25:40)

Truthfully, I had kind of zoned out during the gospel. I know, I’m a horrible person. But I mean, how many times had I heard that classic parable? My mind was wandering to my plans with my friends that night, and what I was going to wear, and how much time I needed to get ready. I hate to admit it, but it was a classic in-one-ear-and-out-the-other kind of a scenario.

Well, fast forward to when it was time for communion, and I’m sitting on the aisle, and in true unabashed fashion, I’m checking out any potential men as they make their way up the aisle.


And at the very end of the line, a homeless man, kind of staggers and hobbles his way up to the front.

And if you’ve never been to Catholic Mass, there’s the Eucharist ((bread)) – which everybody receives – and then off to the side is the wine, which is optional. And you typically just take a teeny-tiny, taste…not even a sip.

Well, this man, walks to the front and sidesteps the bread, and goes straight to the wine, where he chugs the entire vessel.

And as he’s walking back, he is very disruptive: banging on the piano, messing with the candles, muttering to himself, tapping a couple people on the shoulder. Just, kind of causing a ruckus before busting through the back door in an exit made for a TV movie.

I’m going to be brutally honest here, I was really not thinking very kind thoughts at the moment. I was being pretty grossly judgmental. Quite ugly, in fact.


And as I was sitting there beginning to spiral into thoughts of, I hope he doesn’t have a gun, or How could he abuse communion like that? – God literally hit me over the head with His message.

For in that moment, I realized that this was literally the gospel – that I had just heard five minutes ago – playing out right in front of me.

Whatever you do to the least of these my brothers, you do it to Me. 


Suddenly, I was filled with so much conviction for the horribly judgmental things I was thinking. And I saw that man with new eyes – as though I was looking at Jesus.

His toes were sticking out of the fronts of his worn out gym shoes. His tattered clothes were hanging off of him. This was a broken man, hungry and cold, that was trapped in the cycle of addiction, and needing some serious help.

And it was then that it dawned on me…what I had just said about that homeless man, could have been said about me too, during my anorexia. I was that man – broken, hungry, cold, and trapped in the addiction and enslavement of my eating disorder.

I had been there.

Sure, I may not have been stealing communion wine, but I had been doing other things that were just as unthinkable.

What about my habitual lying about my food intake? What about my addiction to the feeling of emptiness and impulsive need to burn calories?

I was no better than that homeless man. How dare I sit there and think disdainfully of him? This man needed compassion. And empathy. And help.


Walking home and thinking about that gospel, I realized that I had always thought about it from the position of privilege. “Someone who is hungry, or in prison, or naked, etc. etc…those downtrodden people, how sad for them. I’m so glad that’s not me.” 

For the first time, I realized that, I was “those people”….We are all “those” broken people at one time or another.

And so was Jesus, when He chose to die.

Since then, I’ve often thought about that man. Especially as the temperature is dropping, and we’ve come to the time of year where family togetherness and overeating are all the norm. And I wonder if he’s warm. Where his family is. Where’s he’s sleeping.

I guess the next time I’m quick to judge, I need to take a second look. See Jesus. And see  the thread of humanity that is present in me, too.

And maybe it’s time for me to look into volunteering at the local soup kitchen.


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297 responses to “Walking the Talk”

  1. The good Lord certainly has a way of cracking us over the head with things doesn’t He 🙂 Just like what happened at mass, He certainly can get our attention :):) I was broken, and can’t really say that I am not full of cracks right now 😉

    • Hi Margaret! oh He really does! I feel the same way. hope you had a beautiful Thanksgiving! thanks for stopping by! big hugs xo

      • Loving your white sweater and your boots, by the way. It’s always a pleasure stopping by. I’m not going to say you know I wouldn’t miss it for the world, because last time I said that for the next couple of weeks, it would be days before I could get to read your post LOL. God bless you. Big hugs :):)

      • aw thank you 🙂 hahaha you’re funny!! have a great night and God bless! Hugs and love xox

  2. This reminds me of when I think i have something to hold on to, as the illusory exterior part of me grabs it evaporates and I stumble at the feet of Him reminded again i need to be rid of “die” to self

    • That is such a powerful image. One that I can totally relate to. you’re right – we need to die to self. Hugs and love xox

  3. Praise God that your heart is soft and moldable in His hands and that you listened to His prompting. Not everybody in the Church gets that.
    Bless you, Caralyn!

  4. A soup kitchen? Not ideal but it would definitely be ironic. Ever thought about volunteering at the VA or a children’s hospital?

  5. Hey, lady: have you done or attended book signings? Done or attended any inspirational speaking? Mass is a pretty passive exercise – not the best way to meet the kind of person that would be able to go toe-to-toe with you in a relationship. I hate to say this, but you need to put yourself front and center.

    • Hey Brian! thanks for that idea. I’ve definitely attended some conferences and things. pretty awesome people for sure. hope you’re having a great night~ Hugs and love xox

  6. I had an encounter with a man needing money for a meal and I was reluctant to give him any. I felt awful but knowing some folks use handouts for not good purposes that thought took over. I felt guilty and I need to be more generous with what God gave me.

    • Yeah, it is always a tough thing to decipher for sure. thanks for sharing that, Tony. Hugs and love xox

  7. This is truly what I come here to find – hope. It’s eloquently written and thought provoking. Thank you for putting it out into the world. I think it’s so important to not judge others and the fact that you saw yourself in that homeless man and made that connection means you have the beautiful gift of empathy. Your stories often touch my heart. This one absolutely did.

    • oh my gosh thank you so much Maria, i really appreciate your kind words. big big big hugs to you xox

      • You are amazing! I love your writing! Thank you for being you! Just so you know, any guy would be so lucky to have you. I too, am searching for my one true love. I believe he is out there. You are so incredible I mean that. I’m sure you will soon meet that special man you are searching for.

      • Thanks again friend. Yes! Our men are out there! we just have to keep looking and be patient! big hugs xox

  8. It takes a lot of courage to be honest with ourselves, and it took a lot for you to do that so, too.

    On the other hand, you can not judge even yourself and the reason is for that: God, our Heavenly Parent has never judged you or any of us. As a parent He sees the potential in each and every one of us and keeps encouraging.

    A prayer, a deed for someone else is an encouragement, too.


    • Thanks so much Friend. I really appreciate that. You’re so right – He does see our potential. Hugs and love xox

  9. This is a beautiful post! Very thought provoking. I so agree that we are all that man at some point in our lives. God bless you and your family. 👍🏻💕❤️

    • Thanks so much John! I really appreciate it 🙂 yep! At some point or another. Hugs and love xox

  10. Beautiful post! I’ve never been a very religious person, but the message was still clear and relatable. I find myself judging at the way some of the homeless stagger around, out of their element, when someone should probably be kicking me over the head with a reminder that that person is still a person, and that I have no idea what circumstances led to their homelessness.
    I love that last line, too. And actually, I can tell you that from personal experience, it’s gotten a lot better—I feel my own mind opening—since I started volunteering at my local kitchen two years ago. And even moreso, now that I have a more concrete job working directly with the center!

    • Thank you so much! I’m glad this resonated with you. Oh that’s so awesome that you’ve had such a positive experience volunteering. I’ll definitely have to look into it! Hugs and love xox

  11. I’m amazed to read blogs like yours in today’s world where people naturally look down on each other and fail to see how we all look in the eyes of the Universal Family. You are honest about yourself and it encourages us all to take a good look at our own performance and realize we like that man you mention are unworthy of a second look by our cousins in heaven. And yet, Jesus valued us and set us an example to treat others as He treats us. Thank you for your refreshing honesty, a rare commodity in today’s world. 🙂

    • Oh gosh thank you Ian. You’re so right – He did value us, so we should value one another. Thanks for your kind words! Hugs and love xox

  12. We have all been this judgemental person! It is an ongoing battle, to keep ourselves in check. Jesus knows we are born in sin, and that’s why He’s given his blood for us. Of course, that’s not an excuse to keep on sinning, but it is a comfort when we fall and need to pick ourselves up.

    God bless you, always!

    • Hi Miss Jay! Thank you for your this thoughtful response. You’re so right – it is definitely a comfort! Hugs and love xox

  13. A very conscious choice. I would help more. My job. It’s tough. I never had that privilege you speak of they were the people I grew up with. Some of them got better. Most. Need a lot before they hit, poverty. This is our America and our reality. Jesus. Kind of blesses those with the most. Which is fine. We made poverty and we made poor and the rich. Trespassing. Gets you a weekend in jail. Six meals you don’t have to beg for.

    • Thanks Kenzie for this powerful insight. Yeah we need to help and give to the max. So much to mull over. Thanks for stopping by and for offering this moving perspective. Hugs and love xox

      • You will find your own way. I don’t hide where I came from. When the need arises after a disaster I shut my business down now and go fight. God. Is there somewhere but, it’s really not about that. It’s people. I see that helplessness and you just know. I don’t pull people aside and ask, are you a Christian? Have more. Are you an immigrant? Have less. Would Jesus do that? I’ve been helping others my whole life. I never expected anything. I guess. It’s what I received. Nothing. Sure. There’s a philosophy that looks good on telethons and pins and ribbons for giving because, that one day out of a whole life of privilege. Huge deal. It’s hard to convey that. Mother Theresa was told by a reporter once, “I wouldn’t do this for a million dollars.” She replied, “I would not either.” That is, what volunteering should accomplish. That is, why Amish can build a house in a day. The pride is the pin and the T-shirt and the Instagrammable pose. The worth is when you don’t need that stuff and see them with love.

      • You pick the safest sentence to respond too. I want dialogue. Argument. Be wrong. Be right. I’m just, not this. Bye. You’re in good company.

      • Sorry Kenzie, I’m not the arguing type. Glad you stopped by and i do appreciate your thoughts and perspectives. Have a great night. X

      • I just, like blogs with, conversations. Possibly even an action from its contributors. It seems at times all the comments are compliments to you. Totally taking away from the hard subjects. Homeless have nothing. Literally. To receive even one compliment for something you haven’t really done yet. I don’t know. Seems wrong. I just can’t be a part of it anymore.

  14. There’s a poem, Delight in Disorder by Robert Frost. You should read it. I’m sure you’re a sight when glammed up, but the picture of you in tonight’s post is perfect. Take a tip from a guy who shied away from some gorgeous women, because I was too intimidated by them.

    I met Meredith Baxter once. My heart was about beating out of my chest when I walked up to her – I really had to psych myself up just to walk across the room – but by the end of our short conversation, it turned out she had been yearning for someone to just walk up and talk to her like a person! I found out later that I made HER night.

    Remember; you’re that Tiffany lamp with God lighting you up from the inside. No amount of makeup and hair spray will ever match that kind of beauty. Go with what you do best; be the BeautyBeyondBones we all know. Clean, smiling, and some nice casual clothes. God does the rest.

    Caralyn, I’m sitting here with tears in my eyes. I don’t know exactly why other than I know something of your experience. Read about an Elaborate Plan https://jeffreyhking.wordpress.com/2015/12/28/elaborate-plans/ that played out 2-1/2 years ago.

    I was cheering inside that you maybe followed him out, bought him some food, etc. But as I thought that I also worried what could happen to you if you did; attractive, not especially strong – outside of hugs! – who knows how that might have ended.

    I think the soup kitchen idea is a great one. It’s a controlled environment, safer than going on a Lone Ranger mission! Remember the old guy you wrote about months ago that bent your ear at the deli counter? Who knows when you’ll meet another one of those?

    There might even be one or two cute volunteers or staff guys there!

    I’ve been enjoying Bloom and, as you’ve seen, been writing some offshoot thoughts when I can find something different to say on the same situation. And of course always ending with a pitch to buy your book! I hope you’re seeing a bump for it!

    • Hey Jeff! Wow what an awesome story about Meredith Baxter! And gosh, thank you for that beautiful encouragement. You seriously are so kind, Jeff. I look forward to reading that article. And you’re right – no Lone Ranger missions for me 🙂 yes! That’s exactly what my dad said about the guy volunteers! Haha thank you. And yes! I did notice that! Thank you!!! Alright hope you’re having a great night! Hugs to you and Julie!

      • FYI – Woke up early today…?!?!? Went over to Patreon to listen, but there’s no recording. The posting is there, title, picture and all, but no recording.

      • Really?!! That’s so strange! I’ll look into what the heck is going on!

  15. Thank you for your brutal honesty. I think we’re all broken in different ways, but that’s how the Light gets in.

    Please tell me, did anyone come to the man’s aid or were people too shocked to? I really hope someone felt moved enough to offer him some food, or new shoes or a warm coat. Of course, me commenting after the fact is very different to being there.

    • That’s how the light gets in! I love that so much! Thanks for sharing this thoughtful response. Unfortunately he bolted out the door before anyone really knew what had taken place. So just prayers for the man. Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox

  16. Yes! we must remember values will adjust to your circumstances in that moment you decide the answer to God’s question “Am I my bothers keeper” Now husband hunting! well from what I see that wouldn’t be bad list to be on

  17. I just want to say thank you for your post. I am going through some pretty uncomfortable transitions right now and I needed this eye opening reminder that continuing to be kind even when everyone else around me us not, is just what I needed. As a person also in recovery, it is necessary to remain humble. We are all His children. Thank you.

    • thank you so much or haring your story. i’lll definitely be keeping you in my prayers. you’re right – we are all His children. Hugs and love xox

    • oh my gosh what an incredibly kind thing to say! thank you so much! biggest of hugs to you xox

    • Thank you friend. You’re right – we all do. We’re all in this together. Hugs and love xox

  18. I heard a similar story in a book I read, don’t remember the name of the book, but the story stuck. A man was on a train with his kids, the kids were being what he considered to be a tad obnoxious, even disrespectful. The story teller was relating how he was judging this father for not having control over his kids and judging him as a father in general. Wisdom caught him before he spoke and instead, he started a civil conversation with the dad. He found out, they had justy come from the funeral of their mom and the young boys were acting out a bit – not really knowing how to express their grief – and the dad, grieving also, did not have it in him to discipline them being they had just come from the funeral of their mom. The moral, is learn the story first – do it with genuine interest with a sense to help, not condem. God Bless!!

    • thanks so much for sharing this. oh wow, that’s such a powerful story. you’re right – learn the story first! Hugs and love xox

  19. Beauty Beyond Bones is one incredible blog. This post is one of the many reasons why. I pray that God provide a time that we can be together my friend. Your heart is a Godsend. Thank you.

    • gosh, thank you so much Daniel. I really appreciate that. what a kind thing to say. hugs to you xo

  20. I wanted to say, I related this story, because I have and still do at times the same thing. I automatically think many time “Don’t they know any better!?” Rather than, I wonder what’s causing them so much pain. Love and hugs to you to!

  21. What a beautiful testimony. I did something similar and I immediately rectified it. I’ve sung in church choirs for ages. Most of the choirs (with the exception of our church in SC, have been in a “choir loft”. Well, as you might know, most protestant churches have a loft, but its actually a balcony for more seating. The church we’ve been in since 2000 hasn’t had a true “established choir” for quite some time, but an organist, and those of us who go up and sing. On occasion you get people in our church who “come up” and find out that its the singers who are there, and not just “other parishioners”. When that happens you want to act hospitable, but at the same time you feel like “this isn’t a free balcony, either join us in singing or don’t come up”. Well one time, some years ago, it was before Mass, and a couple with a baby came up. I was in the middle of the loft and blurted out “this is just for singers”. Well after they left I felt VERY remorseful and went down and shook their hands personally during the sign of peace and told them that they could come up whenever they wanted. You are right, we aren’t “privileged”. We are all God’s children and we need to give from our hearts. I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving and its always wonderful to read your posts. Hugs and love!! xoxoxoxo

  22. Thank you. I am grateful that church gave the man some warmth and company, at least he left filled with the blood of Jesus. 😉

    • Thanks so much friend. That’s so true! He left filled with that! 🙌🏼 glad you stopped by. Hugs and love xox

  23. I so enjoy your posts. They are so full of real life — where God likes to get our attention. And you have hit on the secret of Jesus… He was truly able to put Himself in the place of the downtrodden and miserable — it was the source of His compassion. It was WHY He was so compassionate. And maybe it is one of the reasons why His ministry was so laden with power. God is never distant from our pain. He is truly in the midst of our pain. And when we turn compassionate eyes to the lowly and hurting, we find we are loving with the the Heart of God. Thanks for your words, your dedication, and your honesty. God is blessing you in ways you cannot yet see… M. A.

    • Oh my gosh MA, thank you so much for this beautiful response. You’re so right – He is with us during our pain and suffering. What a comforting thought. Thanks for stopping by. Hugs and love xox

  24. I caught myself the othe night, judging another woman for a relationship she was in. I absolutely had no right to sit there and talk about where she was with God. This blog post reminded me again about my behavior!

  25. Sometimes that still small voice can truly grab our attention and shake us to our very core. How sweet of you to remind that we have all allowed those thoughts to enter our thoughts, but how wise of you to not allow them a foothold….blessings…xoxo

    • Hi Ann, thank you so much for this thoughtful response. You’re so right – that still small voice. Hugs and love xox

  26. Wow – you got some good comments on this post. I started looking through the comments wondering if you got any marriage proposals, then I said to myself; nah – she probably is having as much luck as I did finding a single lady at Church. I met my wife bowling of all places 😬 So, I work in public service and believe me, my faith is tested every day – I’ve seen it all: murder, abuse, drugs, violence, and you name it. You hit an important message here – if change is ever going to happen, we ALL have to “walk the walk”. Have you seen the story about the couple that helped the homeless guy with the Gofundme page? That’s kindness in action. God bless

  27. You need to be syndicated.
    There does not exist any chance whatsoever on this planet in this galaxy you will not end up writing for a living and become a household name. As Forest Gump said….”That is all I have to say about that.”
    The media is jam packed full of people, big name people who cannot write like you.
    Keep GOING. The good you are doing cannot be measured in this life.

    • Oh my gosh Roland you are too kind! Seriously, what an incredibly kind thing to say. I am truly touched. Big hugs to you friend xox Ps- i love Forrest Gump 🙂

  28. Wow.. That was awesome. God has a way of hitting us upside the head and convicting us. He got your attention. Even though your intent was one thing, God turns everything to good to those who love him.

  29. Hey, great blog post, I like the way you write, quite humorous and then serious, it fits well! It’s amazing how (including myself here) everyone is quick to judge, but when we have Jesus inside of us, He kinda “puts” us in that position, you know, makes us think, “what if that was us?” Then that is how we share the gospel to them, because we can relate somehow (if you get what I mean! :P) – I’ll pray for that homeless chap 🙂 xx

    • Thanks so much! I’m so glad you enjoyed it! and I’ll for sure join you in that prayer. Hugs and love xox

  30. This reminds me of something I read in my devotional (Our Daily Bread) the other day about looking at others through the eyes of our own humanity. It’s an apt lesson, and I’m not surprised to see it again, maybe I’m also being nudged. “Listen Tosin, listen!”

    • Thank you so much Tosin, i appreciate your thoughts on this! I definitely think you are being nudged! Hugs and love xox

  31. I really loved this post! When we can see others through the eyes of empathy, we’ll begin to see that we’re not all that different. Thanks for the reminder…

  32. The post itself struck me, but there was a deeper message that was revealed as I continued to read. Genesis 3:1 (NIV) states “Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the LORD God had made…” He’s so crafty, in fact that you having come from “…the position of privilege…” actually despised/fought against the blessing of abundance (e.g. food, family support, ease, etc.), rejecting the privilege as the enemy desired to make you destitute on many levels at the same time.

    Many of us, having come from “educated” families and “stable” homes, have been used by the enemy to reject the privileges (blessings) the Lord has given us–usually in the form of somehow walking away from the love and stability given us. Drug addiction, porn addiction, low self-worth, suicide, etc. are some of the primary things I’ve observed over the course of my life to this point.

    Interestingly, many poor/homeless/needy individuals become quite pissed off that those who seem to be privileged squander/reject the blessing of privilege. They then become angry to the point of belligerence when in the company of those deemed “privileged.” This individual then commits crimes (sins) against his/her own body, against others, against property, etc.

    So, through the enemy’s craftiness, the privileged individual rejects the blessings given to him/her, and the poor/needy individual, feeling rejected by others and by God possibly, fights against the world–including his/her own body–all because of the enemy’s impact.

    Thank God for His grace so that at some point we wake up to see the truth through Christ’s eyes as you were blessed to see.

    • Thank you so much for this thoughtful response. There’s a lot of powerful food for thought here. That’s a great point never to reject our blessings. Hugs and love xox

  33. I have come here via ‘Mitigatingn Chaos’ and how glad I am that I did. Those wake-up calls are only for those who are prepared to listen which shows you to be a wise and decent young woman who has clearly had her own trials in life. Would that others learned and stopped the pervasive pong of prejudice from ruling them but rather understood that there but for the Grace of God go every single one of us. I have a dear friend who is fond of saying ‘we are all only two steps from the gutter as we walk down our road’. Thank you – this is a most excellent piece.

  34. I am not a religious person myself and am often disturbed by the horrible things that are supposedly done in the name of religion, but your posts always remind me of what the role of faith is truly supposed to be.

    • Thank you so much Ashley. That seriously touches my heart. I’m so glad that my posts resonate with you. Thank you for reading! Sending big big hugs xox

  35. As always you hit the mark with your blog. Thank you for reminding us all that we are all broken and in need of help from one another. Man blessings to you.

    • Thanks Loretta. I really appreciate your kind words. And thanks again for reposting! Hugs and love xox

  36. Yes, mercy triumphs over judgment; but,we are called to be shrewd and cunning and discerning in what we say and do.
    This generation of believers faces a spiritual “minefield” in our daily walk. I pray often for God’s wisdom. I pray for the Kingdom family as well. Thank you for sharing your honesty.

    • Thanks so much Gary. You’re right – it’s a minefield indeed!! I’ll join you in those prayers. Hugs and love xox

    • Thank you so much Heather:) you’re right- sometimes we can’t see it through our blessings. Thanks for stopping by! I hope you’re having a great week! Hugs and love xox

  37. I heard that gospel too, and I applaud you for your compassion. But I do wonder. Suppose the baked don’t want to be clothed? Are you then inflicting charity on them and taking away their right to choose? Is that worse than doing nothing? Is it then more charitable to leave them alone?

    • Thank you so much friend. That’s definitely something to mull over. Thanks for stopping by. Hugs and love xox

  38. I appreciate how honest you are about expressing your true feelings. Thanks for sharing this. I love how you shared a real life example of the Gospel, God gives us those everyday. You were blessed to have seen that.

    • Thank you so much D. I appreciate your kind words and support. You’re right – He gives us examples every day. Hugs and love xox

  39. Thank you so much for this thoughtful response. only two steps – what a powerful thought. Hugs and love xox

  40. Excellent post and a great reminder that we oftentimes need to take a step back and show everyone the grace they deserve despite their outward appearance and *sometimes* unthinkable actions. I appreciate your honesty and really loved/needed this post today! Hugs. xoxo

    • thank you Brittney! you’re right – we need to show that grace for sure. glad you stopped by! big hugs xox

  41. I had a somewhat similar experience recently. I was in an AA meeting, and a drunk man walked in. He was silent for a while, and then he stood up and began shouting nonsense. I tensed, preparing to stand up and confront the guy and usher him out, all the while thinking, “You don’t need to be here, you’re ruining this for everyone.” Really?! Where else should a drunk be besides an AA meeting? He obviously needed help. I’m so quick to judge and think about my own comfort. Three years ago, I was that man…I just didn’t interrupt meetings. There but for the grace of God go I….

    • Thanks Robert, for sharing this experience. I can’t imagine the tension that must have sparked. Yeah God’s grace is sure incredible. Hugs and love xox

  42. Thank you for the reminder. I, too, heard the same Gospel reading this past weekend.

    I’m convicted.

    I want to hear, “Come, you who are blessed by my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world.” But have I done anything of the things that come with that inheritance?

    Time for me to wake up!

  43. Wonderful insight, thanks for sharing. As I work with formerly homeless I continue to be surprised at their surprise at how similar we are. After working all day with one man on a carpentry project he exclaimed, “You’re just like me!” and he was so right, alcoholism, shame, and even darker addictions had kept me prisoner all my life and when he saw that it was like he had permission to be broken and still be human. It really hit me because I saw the same thing, something that I always have to remind myself of and pray about, I’m broken but made beautiful through His sacrifice.

    • Thanks friend. Wow what powerful work you do. You’re right – we are all made beautiful through Him! Hugs and love xox

  44. Good Morning Caralyn. You did it to me again! 😀 I didn’t have a chance to read your post last night, so I read it this morning, while sitting in the car dealership, waiting for the shuttle ride home while the vehicle gets winterized. By the time I finished reading, tears were welling up inside my eyes, so it is a good thing the driver arrived, and asked who was waiting for a ride, and broke through my thoughts.
    As you mentioned the gentleman in church, it reminded me of many people I know in our area who suffer in a variety of ways, from drug or alcohol abuse, many from mental challenges, and some from neglect and physical abuse their entire lives. Although I don’t know if any actually entered a church and drank the wine during a communion service.
    I know all these people from years of doing street ministry in our downtown core, volunteering in a Drop In Centre, as well as being part of a new church in the core for the abusers, disenfranchised, working girls, hurting people etc.. So as I read your post, I was thinking of many of them, and their lives and hurt.
    A number of years ago, we had a speaker at our church who impacted my life greatly. She worked among homeless etc. in the province of British Columbia here in Canada. She shared also about looking at each person through the eyes of Jesus, but then as well, to look at each person as being Jesus, because He loves them, and is calling each one to Himself, so His Spirit can indwell each.
    Thank you Caralyn, for being a servant of Jesus Christ, who is using your talents and gifts to honour Him, as you Bless and encourage many.

    God Bless You Abundantly,
    Luv and hugs. 😀🌹❤️😘

    • Hey George, thank you for sharing your thoughts on this. wow, that sounds like a really powerful speaker. that’s so true – we need to see Jesus in every single person. Thanks for your wonderful encouragement. it really means the world. big hugs to you xox

  45. I loved this post! Just heard a sermon on how we all are the same with the same sins. And we are not better than ANYONE else we see, although we are pretty good at judging that, thinking we are better then someone else. And GOD humbles! Isn’t it wonderful how GOD can convict us right then and there…….right before our very eyes! Let us be discerning of when HE does and be intentional about how we live out HIS GOSPEL!

    • thank you so much!! what a kind comment. you’re right – God humbles and really does give us a straight message right there. thanks for stopping by. Hugs and love xox

  46. I love that God is always there to guide our hearts and our thoughts with gentle reminders and signs through his word. It is so easy to forget to stay humble and to remember that we have been at the bottom at one point or another… and it is so easy to forget that we are all God’s children. Love this post!

    • hi friend, thank you so much for sharing your thoughts. that’s so true! we are ALL His children and deserve love and respect and dignity 🙂 Hugs and love xox

  47. Hi ! I love your post! As I was reading it, I was sitting in awe about my next blog being so similar to your words of judgement. I was sitting last night thinking that I will write next about judging and how we can start to reach out to those in need instead of shunning upon them. We may just say something or do something that changes their life. Great words!

    • hey friend! oh thank you so much. sounds like it’s going to be a great post! Hugs and love xox

  48. Such a needful truth and convicting reminder right there! Thank you for your beautiful transparency. ~ D.

  49. One thing about it, Jesus did not turn him away did He? He gave to him all which was contained in the Chalice. Far more than wine was there.

    You know one time in my perish we have this mentally impaired person. He and I have set on the same pew forever. I love him with all of my heart.

    Well long story short, whenever he would go up to receive the Chalice, he would drink it all. This made some in my Church a little “nervy” to say the least, so the family would get behind me to walk with him, and they explained what was going on. After about a week of thinking about this, I called the family and gave them my thoughts.

    For one we sit in the back so there is hardly anything left in the first place, so that meant all those in front of us were “chugging it down.” He is always behind me and if there is one teaspoon left for me, that is a lot.

    Another, how blessed are we that we are not like G. If Jesus so chooses to give every single ounce of Himself to him, so be it. I also said, “If he was in my care, he and I would sit in the front and be the first one’s up there and I would tell him, “Have at it!” “Drink all you want!”

    From that day on the family quit getting in between he and I. The woman of the house said, “You have really made me think differently about this.” So we never know do we, what Jesus has in mind? Love you and God Bless, SR

    • you’re right about that – far more than wine was there. thanks for this powerful perspective. i really appreciate your sharing your experience, SR. and that’s so true – we never know what Jesus has in mind. so glad you stopped by. big hugs x

  50. Church is an excellent place to husband hunt. 😉

    I must admit I’m not that tolerant of foolishness. I’d have been up out of my seat and helping the homeless man out of the back door before he finished chugging the sacramental wine.

    I firmly believe that Yeshua did not want us to be indiscriminate in our judgment. Each of us, children of Heavenly Father, has the divine spark (and therefore divine potential) within us. So we cannot “judge” where someone is going in the eternities; heaven, hell or somewhere else.

    What we can, and should judge, is whether someone’s actions are constructive and at least generally good or whether they are bad.

    Homeless man would have found himself outside before he had a chance to realize what happened. 😉

    • hahah thanks James. you’re right – church is a *great* place to find a spouse 🙂 That’s so true – we all have that divine spark. thanks for stopping by. big hugs x

  51. Thanks so much for sharing. So true! Isn’t it amazing when God hits us over the head with something? I was just thinking that I’d really like to share some of my faith in my next blog – something I haven’t done before. So refreshing to read you sharing yours so openly. So thank you! I found real encouragement in this.

    • thank you so much friend. oh i think you should go for it! i would love to read your words about it. i’m in your corner and cheering for you!! so glad this resonated with you 🙂 big hugs xo

  52. I’m not a Christian myself, but this certainly does resonate with me. I’ve been self-conscious of my body image for all my life, and the way that people saw me. Since realizing how that influenced my mindset and behavior, I’ve always tried my best to see the same of others: we have all been in situations when we are not at our best. And as difficult as it can be to step out of a mindset that condescends and scolds instead of one that tries to understand and love, it can and should be done. The poor and the homeless are often the ones that are looked down upon and are given the least amount of understanding. I wish that people would realize what you are speaking of here, whether it is because God hits them over the head or simply because of empathy. Thank you for sharing this!

    • Thanks Aarti! I’m so glad this resonated with you. You’re so right – understanding and empathy are two things the world could use a lot more of! Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox

    • Thank you so much! Gosh that’s kind of you to say 🙂 have a great night! Hugs and love xox

  53. This post is awesome, because it encompasses the UGLY and BEAUTIFUL of the humanity that is in every one of us. Your authenticity and relatability (I believe) are why people are driven to your blog. Don’t lose that ministry heart 🙂

    • Gosh thank you Brent. What a kind thing to say:) you’re right – both of those are in each and every one of us. Hugs and love xox

  54. Thanks for your honesty! It is very easy to judge others. I am not sure how I would have reacted to the incidence at the church. I love could easily reacted the way you did. I love how you help us to see Jesus in him and in you when you were struggling. Your message needs to be spoken every where. I am glad many have seen this post. I am touched that you take the time to respond to each person. Blessings Roland 🙂

    • Thanks Roland! Gosh you’re kind to say that. Yeah it was a pretty sobering experience all the way around. So glad you stopped by! Hugs and love xox

  55. Wonderful post!
    I often ask God to give me eyes like his, so I can see people the way he does. For who they were created to be and not for who they are without Jesus. It is very true that we are all broken, like broken vessels, in some way or another at the feet of Jesus. Yet, he is the one to mend us and heal us with his love and mercy and patience, all the time: he never fails. He is the potter and we are truly, the clay.
    Thank you so much. God bless you!

    • Thanks friend. That is so beautiful. We really are all at the feet of Jesus. What a comforting thought. Hugs and love xox

  56. Soup kitchens are also a good place for husband-hunting. In fact, anywhere that you’re doing something you feel is important … The numbers may be small, but how wonderful to find someone who thinks your important things are important too!

  57. Honestly my immediate pervading thought was, “Isn’t this the kind of heart that could stand to gain so much from sharing in the blood of Jesus?”

    And I get it – religion isn’t a friend to the least of these. I know that’s a harsh indictment but it’s true; religion–what we’ve made of religion in the west, anyway–would rather give that soul the fifty-thousand-steps-to-gaining-the-acceptance-of-Jesus (never mind his affections) because it puts the least of these into two categories: easily-ignored ‘willful sinners’, or reformed saints with the humanity of Jesus scrubbed out of them.

    Sorry, I actually didn’t mean to go on that rant! Haha.. stay tuned for a more interesting comment on your last Wednesday post 😉

    I love that Jesus keeps revealing himself to you in the unlikely. Watch for him, and you’ll see him where you never expected (:

    • Hey Carson! Thank you so much. Yeah, we’ve always got to keep our eyes open for Him. And what a powerful perspective. Thanks for sharing. Hugs and love xox

  58. What a lovely kindred spirit experience, BBB. Your honest sight is precious, whether looking at yourself, Jesus, or your neighbors. Your words echo back with enhanced meaning on the rebound. Keep preaching it.

    • Thanks so much – i really appreciate your encouragement 🙂 have a great Wednesday! Hugs and love xox

  59. Just wanted to give you a shout for how much I enjoyed this blog post. You are so right, we look at ministry from the eyes of plenty instead of from the eyes of those in need. Please keep up the good work


    • thank you so much! what a kind thing to say. you’re right – we need to see with those eyes. Hugs and love xox

  60. Husband hunting…I hope you find what you’re looking for. You seem like you have a fairly stable head on your shoulders and I think somebody who is good for you will be able to see you and want to spend forever with you. You are right; we are all broken in one way or another. I guess that comes down to “judge not least ye be judged.” I am guilty of this myself sometimes.

    Best wishes with your husband hunting.

    • haha thank you so much 🙂 and that’s so true – we are all broken in one way or another, so who am i to judge. so glad you stopped by. big hugs x

  61. Beautiful post. Very thought provoking. I, too, am guilty of hearing the Gospel and the homily without really listening to it. Thank you for sharing and for making me think and reflect.

  62. The only thing you are is a human being. You aren’t a thug, or an uncaring woman, or a zillion other things you could call yourself. The man knew where he could get a free drink without getting beat up or arrested and he succeeded. He probably even laughed with his friends about it. You don’t need to make a promise to work in a soup kitchen. Most likely, if you were geared for it you’d already be there. Jesus asks us to pray for Him to round up people for the harvest. He asks us to pray for others to do it, those who He knows are best suited for the holy assignment set before them. You might very well BE that person to work in a kitchen but judging by your posts I’ve read, I doubt it. Instead you are probably already doing what He wants you to do. When He wants you to do something He will set it in front of you, leaving no doubt. Of course I doubt He’d say ‘no’ to you if you go through with serving meals, He’ll just re-adjust His heavenly gps and move people around here and there. It will all end in victory with His glory plastered all over it.
    Your posts are a delight to read. Don’t stop.

    • thank you so much for sharing your thoughts on this. you’re right – we need to pray for others, that’s such a great point. big hugs to you xox

      • I hope I didn’t sound harsh. I believe we can sell ourselves short sometimes, not realizing that we are already doing many things for God. I think living in a competitive society can distract us from what we are already doing by holding up a shiny, new ‘something else’.

      • oh no not at all! I think you’re really onto something there 🙂 thanks again for stopping by! Hugs and love xox

  63. I loved this post! I have been in similar experiences of judgement followed by realization of how wrong I was. I kinda love it when that happens, because it reminds me that I am not all-knowing, and who is.
    Blessings to you,

    • thank you so much Carole. amen to that! He is all knowing and has everything under control. big hugs xo

  64. What an incredible post, actually brought a prickle of saltwater to this cynical eye. Our judgements of others only reveal our own flaws, especially when those we judge are downtrodden and persecuted and hurting, the same people Christ loved so well and liberated so perfectly.

    Kudos on catching your own thoughts and turning them over so beautifully, you’re a better person than me!

  65. Funny story, and great lesson about having an open perspective when viewing others, and their situation.

    I’ve been working on being less judgemental and having better tact when talking to people when I have an issue, and my mantra lately is that when I feel like criticizing others, I’m going look inward first, and ask if it’s necessary, and also that I’m not anywhere near perfect either, and I could use that energy bettering my own character.

    • Thanks again 🙂 yeah that’s definitely something i need to work on too. Hugs and love xox

    • oh thank you Benny, what a kind and thoughtful message. same to you 🙂 merry Christmas! Hugs and love xox

  66. Lots of things popped into my mind here. And I’d probably initially think the same as you.
    But having being down a bad road of grief before I realised I “misbehaved” a lot too. No one knows that man’s back story, maybe he lost his job and family and had no money for a home … etc.
    We don’t know how badly others have treated him before, maybe he is broken and desperate and doesn’t know how to ask for help.
    Addiction is horrible, people with addictions are not in control of themselves, they don’t think straight, they need help and compassion. Sometime they automatically expect people to mistreat them so get in there first with their bad behaviour.
    Thankyou for sharing this very honest post.

    • Thanks so much for sharing your story. Those are such great points. Hugs and love xox

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