I’d like to first start off tonight by thanking you for your patience last week with my post.
You may have noticed that it was late in posting. And no, there wasn’t a glitch in the system. Nor was I eaten by sharks.
I was…afraid.

For the first time, in my entire blogging lifetime, I let fear get the best of me.
If you missed Thursday’s post, and you have no idea what the heck I’m talking about, I wrote a piece about my virginity. Monday night was the premiere episode of The Bachelor, and Colton Underwood, the lead, is being touted as The Virgin Bachelor. And naturally, as a fellow virgin, I wanted to share my two cents, as seemingly the entire country is making fun of this brave [and handsome] young man. You can read it here.
But I had gone around and around about publishing it all day. I felt in my soul, that it was one of my better blog posts, but I knew that publishing it could have some real negative repercussions. I could offend a lot of people. I could potentially hurt some people, or make them feel uncomfortable.
And 7pm – my publishing time – came…and it stared me in the face. And then it went. And I couldn’t bring myself to push “publish”, afraid of the possible negative consequences.
After all, my viral post about Trump…it cost me a few friendships that never recovered.
So defeated, deflated, and utterly disappointed in myself, I came to terms with the fact that I let fear win. And I went and met up with some friends at our local bar in Ohio, as I was leaving the following morning to fly back to NYC.
And I was one of the first ones to arrive, and I was talking to my dear, sweet, friend and she could tell my mind was unsettled about something. So I told her about the post, and she looked at me and said, “Absolutely publish it.” She said, “I wish I could have read something like that when I was in college.”
I think so often we let fear dictate our actions. We desire control, familiarity, guarantees, you name it — so we shy away from anything outside our comfort zones.
And how unfortunate is that?
What are we missing out on? What impact could we be making if we quit letting our fear determine our future?
Honestly, I think this is one foothold that the evil one likes to use to hold us back from pursuing the path that God has set before us. What a victory for him if he silences that which brings people together – that which spreads the Good News — that which ignites hope and faith and life-giving-love?

So what do we do?
Because if you ask the culture, they’ve got their answer all tee’d up: bravery.
Especially when it comes to young ladies, bravery is the buzz word of the moment. Reflected in movies, and songs, and tee-shirts. We’re led to believe that being brave is the antidote to fear.
But I’m here to tell you, that answer totally misses the mark.
The only way to truly fight fear, is to radically trust.

Bravery — it’s self-reliant. It’s: what I can do to control the situation. Depending on my strength, my wisdom, my preparedness, my power to manhandle the outcome.
When in fact, trust, is the humble powerhouse that does the opposite.
Trusting in God’s strength, God’s wisdom, preparedness, and power. Relying on His goodness to provide, as Father, for His beloved children.
“Do not fear, only believe.” – Mark 5:36
Now, I’m not a gambler, but I’d much rather place my bet on Him, than my feeble, earthly self.
When I first began my recovery from anorexia, it goes without saying that everyday presented a myriad of challenges and fears. Heck, I would wake up afraid.
But there was a little mantra that I adopted, that honestly, I have been incorporating into my life every day, ever since. And it is this:
There is nothing I will face today that Jesus and I can’t get through, together.

It is a nod to Philippians 4:13: I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
My recovery – I was incapable of doing it on my own. Ask anyone who has struggled with an ED, or an addiction of any type – they will attest to this. I needed my Father. I needed a strength that was steadfast – yesterday, today, and tomorrow.
Keeping my eyes firmly locked on Jesus, and radically trusting in His goodness, and firm plan for my life — only then could I face those seemingly insurmountable fears.

So there you go. Not exactly where I expected this blog post to go tonight, but then, when do I ever fully know where the Holy Spirit will lead?
Have a great night, friends.
“Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9

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Wow. I don’t even know what to say to this. It was beautiful, thoughtful and inspiring, everything a good blog post should be. Thank you for this and may God continue to bless you, your family and your friends. 🙏🙏🙏🙏
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Thank you so much Megan, for your encouraging words. It truly means a lot. Hugs and love xox
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Yeah no problem. Glad I could help in some small way.
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Grateful for YOU! 🤗
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Thank you. I’m grateful to you for helping to inspire me.
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✨💛✨🤗
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YES and amen! Fear often holds us back from things we need and want to do, but God reminds us time and time again not to be afraid. Keep being brave, girl!♥️
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Hey Natalie! Thanks lady. Amen to that .. be not afraid!! 🙂 Hugs and love xox
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Great post! You don’t have to be afraid of who you are. You’re a virgin and that’s beautiful. I have slept with a fleet of men and I’m totally comfortable with that. To each their own. And you should be proud to shout your truth from mountaintops! Go you.
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Thank you so much!! I really appreciate you saying that. Yes, from the mountaintops! A little Julie Andrews Sound of Music moment! Haha Hugs and love xox
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Trust is what Mary did when Gabriel shared with her that she would become the mother of our Lord Jesus. By saying yes to God’s plan, she had to trust him because it could have meant her being stoned to death if Joseph had publicly shamed her.
By trusting we let God work out the details. I want to encourage you to continue to trust and share your story because God will work through it.
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I love that so much. Thank you so much. Yeah Joseph’s actions were so beautiful. Both he and Mary are such powerful examples of trust and obedience to God! Hugs and love xox
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Kudos to you for not giving in to fear! You rock, girl! You rock so much! 😀
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Thank you so much. Gosh that means so much. Hugs and love xox
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You’re totally welcome! Lots of love back at ya! 😀
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✨💛✨🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗 have a great night!
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You too! 😀
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God had to tell Joshua many times to be courageous. He knows we can slide back into mediocrity easily. That’s a comfort right there. He knows us & how we tick. Jesus said we would lose family and friends if we followed Him. In other words, it’s okay to be “unfriended”. If we rest in our popluarity, we lose. You are resting in Him, and that’s enough. God’s grip, Alan
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Thank you so much Alan. I love Joshua’s story. I appreciate your encouragement. Hugs and love xox
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I greatly respect and appreciate your perspective. The way the world treats some issues, the “V” one included, is childish. Keep bringing the SaNiTy!!! to us! -Jeff
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Thank you so much Jeff for your encouragement. You’re so right about that. Hugs and love xox
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Just what I needed to hear. This is such a great reminder. Thank you for stepping out in faith and for bravely sharing your thoughts.
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Thanks so much. I’m so glad it resonated with you. Hugs and love xox
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So, you know the evil one is out to get.
You know your Heavenly Father wooped him when His carried our sin to Calvary.
I stand with you sister. You just remember your father isn’t bound by time so when He says in the Psalms that He is your shield, that means a complete, lifelong, with NO breaks in the protection, Shield.
Walk in that victory sister because you know it’s yours. You NEVER have to be afraid to do the right thing.
You’re a warrior, your armor is waiting for you in Ephesians, put it on and kill some more demons.
Love you sister.
George
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Amen to that. Thank you so much George. I love that verse from Ephesians. The armor of God!! Hugs and love xox
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Great post! My favorite that I’ve read of yours so far!! My husband recently bought me a shirt that says “Faith Over Fear.” Hold onto that, it’s the key!
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Thank you so much Holly. Oh gosh what a kind thing to say! Faith over fear! Love that!! Hugs and love xox
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Amen! So glad you published that piece, it was great!
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Thank you Ryan, I appreciate you saying that. Grateful for you! Hugs and love xox
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Keep on calling ‘em like you see ‘em. Doing the right thing is seldom the easy choice, but worth it in the long run.
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Thank you Keith, I appreciate your encouragement. Yes! Hugs and love xox
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First off, don’t be overly hard on yourself; you are human, after all. Now may I offer the very slightest of corrections? Bravery has its place in this situation. The thing people don’t understand is that the bravest thing we can ever do is admit that we can’t handle things alone. It takes bravery to trust, to submit ourselves to a higher power. Those who try and go it alone may seem brave, but I’d wager that many are fearful of failure.
You, my friend, demonstrate bravery through posts like this one. Hugs and love– Mike
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Thank you so much Mike for this encouragement. This is great insight. You’re right – bravery definitely is part of the equation! I like how you say it takes bravery to trust. Amen!! Hugs and love xox
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I for one loved your post!!! I wish I had someone like you to look up to when I was younger…even though I’m older than you! LOL! But it made me think of a video my husband and I watched on YouTube called “Laughing Your Way To A Better Marriage”. He speaks on young people waiting and why it’s so important. And now we can’t wait until our boys are a bit older so they can watch it too! As one who didn’t wait and neither did my husband, we wish so badly we had! For each other! You are amazing! You are one of the first bloggers I started following and I absolutely love reading your posts!
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Oh gosh you are so kind so say that. Thank you friend. I’m so glad it resonated with you! And thanks for passing along that video! I can’t wait to check it out!! Sounds awesome!! Hope you have an amazing night! Hugs and love xox
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Same to you! Keep being YOU!!! XOXO
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✨💛✨🤗🤗🤗
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I’ve shared some of the same fears before publishing my own blog. I take comfort in knowing that the most common phrase in the Bible is “do not be afraid.” When I trust in God, when I let him take control, the writing goes in directions and carries power and might that I could only dreamed of having. As always, thank you for sharing your journey. God bless you.
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Hey Brian, thank you so much for this wonderful affirmation. Amen to that! God guides the pen! Hugs and love xox
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Thank you for trusting in Him and posting your thoughts. I know your words will encourage and inspire a lot of people and that will honor Him. Keep writing!
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Thank you so much Greg for your kind words. I am truly touched and humbled. Hugs and love xox
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Unless the purpose of your website is to make friends then I don’t see what there is to be afraid of. Are you true to God? Are you honest with yourself? What does the Bible say, If God is for you who can be against you? Just let ‘er rip with what is on your heart and let God sort them out. You’ll be fine, young lady.
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Hey friend, thank you for your encouragement. Let ‘er rip haha love that so much. Hugs and love xox
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Wow! Excellent post and great reminder. I’m really struggling with fear at the moment – fear of going forward, of making choices, of the unknown – and this is something I ought to keep in mind. Thanks!
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Thank you so much, I’m sorry to hear this is a challenging season. I’ll definitely keep you in my prayers! Hugs and love xox
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Bravo to you for the post about virginity. I admire you for your stance for yourself and about the bachelor and that hype. It took a lot of guts to post. May God bless you as you continue to trust Him and inspire others.
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Thank you so much 🙂 I really appreciate your affirming words. God bless you too, my friend! Hugs and love xox
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Another great post, never be afraid, trust God and He will always work things out! I enjoyed your post on virginity, seems it is never easy to talk about but we should, it can be a great encouragement to a lot of people. I have lost friends by mentioning I was a virgin but we can’t let that change us. I believe this is what God wants and I trust Him, He always takes care of things for us. God bless you always!
Steve.
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Thank you so much Steve – amen to that! He will always work things out! I appreciate your encouragement! Hugs and love xox
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Thanks for taking the time to read my comment, it’s encouraging.
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✨💛✨ absolutely!
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What a great reminder to stop trying to be self-reliant, but rather rely more on God to face our fears. Thank you, as always, for the weekly encouragement!
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Thank you so much Sami! Yes!! God- reliant! Hugs and love xox
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Sweety, I was a virgin until 25, despite having several boyfriends. No problem whatsoever telling people. I’m in my early 50s and no one has attacked me for saying it yet. Post the post, blogging is all about being yourself.
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Thank you so much, what an encouraging response! And thank you for sharing your story!! Sending big big hugs xox
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A wonderful post filled with brave trust!!
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Thank you so much 🙂 I appreciate that. Hugs and love xox
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Blessings!
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✨💛✨
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Oh my! I love your courage and transparency! Here is a healthy dose of love and support! I wish I could send a bushel basket to you!! Much love as a mother to a daughter! I couldn’t be prouder than if you were my own daughter!!
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Thank you so much Beverly! I am so touched by this! A bushel basket! Oh my goodness yes!! That’s so sweet. Big big hugs to you xox
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Thank you for being bold.
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Thank you JB, means a lot. Hugs and love xox
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You are very welcome BBB. Hugs and love to YOU!!
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✨💛✨
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✨💛✨✨💛✨✨💛✨✨💛✨✨💛✨
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I’ve never watched a single episode of The Bachelor so I am clueless as to how the show plays out; however, I enjoyed reading the previous post and this one. Furthermore, I appreciate your open honesty about your life and beliefs that you share in posts.
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Thank you so much for this wonderful encouragement. 🙂 you’re not really missing much with the bachelor haha big hugs to you xox
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😂!!! Thank you
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✨💛✨
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Phil 4:13 has always been my life verse. Keep trusting in Him – you will never regret it.
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Hey Barbara! Amen to that – will Never Ever regret it! Hugs and love xox
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This is a beautiful post! Roosevelt said the only thing to fear is fear itself. I never really understood what he meant but I always remember it, lol! I do know that fear never got anyone anywhere and we’re afraid to post something because we’re afraid of upsetting someone we’ll never post anything. I 100% didnt agree with you on our President and the post you made but that’s the great thing about our country we’re allowed to have different views and still respect each other and move forward. God gave us a mouth for a reason, to raise our voices and be Brave. We just have to be mindful and respectful of others. And you do that very well 🌷🌷🌷🌷
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Thank you so much Lane! You’re so right – mindful and respectful of every single person 🙂 thank you for doing just that with me 🙂 it means a lot and I am grateful for you! Hugs and love xox
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2 Timothy 1:7. One of my favorite verse. For God did not give us a spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. It’s a reminder that God has given all of us a spirit of power to overcome our fears.
Great Post!! Much love!
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Yes! Oh i love that verse as well. Yes He has! Hugs and love xox
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And, to look back and celebrate past steps taken
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Yes 👍🏼
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🙂
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✨😊✨
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Love this. Radical trust rather than bravery founded on our weak imperfect selves. Thanks for being a courageous writer, brave enough to be vulnerable, trusting God will work good through you. I’m inspired!
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Thank you so much Anna 🙂 i am humbled by your words. Hugs and love xox
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I’d like to really follow the Holy Spirit’s lead more in posting…and not get stuck worrying if people want to hear about stuff or not…too many unpublished or unfinished posts cluttering my soul!
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Beautifully written. As a mother of a 13-year-old girl, I hope my daughter has the relationship with our lord that you do and can say the same when she is your age. Whether that is her path or not though, I am inspired by your words weekly. I have just recently discovered your blog and have fallen in love with the message. Again I thank you for your words and the reminder that we need to let the Lord carry us through that which we were not meant to handle alone. Have a blessed week.
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Thank you Mary, oh my goodness i am incredibly humbled by your generous words. Yes! Let Him carry us through! Hugs and love xox
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Well, after the news and social media took actor and avowed Christian Chris Pratt to task just for saying he was following a diet inspired by the Book of Daniel, I don’t blame you for bring afraid on a number of levels.
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I read that today too!! How awesome that he’s not afraid to share his faith!! Hugs and love xox
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And in total transparency, as a eating disorder recovery blog, I totally do not encouraging fasting like he is doing if a person is susceptible to eating disorders. Even for religious reasons. But none the less – him putting his faith out there is a breath of fresh air!
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I love your daily mantra! Great post! I actually have a post scheduled tomorrow (on a possibly controversial topic) that I was afraid to schedule so I know the struggle! Had a fellow blogger look it over and encouraged me to publish it. Glad you share your faith through this platform!
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thank you so much Johnzelle! Yeah, it brings me comfort for sure! can’t wait to read it! hugs xox
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So good! I prayed recently for God to assuage my fear thinking that would help me be bolder for him. But he declined my request pointing out that when I al fearful I faithful. I think it is a similar point to your post here. I am learning now to lean into my fears and watch God work!! Thanks Caralyn
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Hi Nanette! thank you so much. That’s an awesome prayer. Yes – let’s lean into the so that He can work! hugs xox
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Great Word Sis!
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Thank you so much friend! hugs xo
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God will use your transparency to help lead others to Him, so that they too can be healed and liberated! Continued Blessings!!!
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May His will be done!!
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Have Your way Lord!
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🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
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Love this! Once again you are brave, and bold, and honest. There’s only one you need to please and His name is Jesus! He’s got your back, and your front, and everything else. ❤🙏🏼
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Thank you so much Meghan! gosh, you’re kind to say that. Amen to that – His name is Jesus! hugs to you xo
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Omgoodness! This is absolutely brilliant! Love you more with every post. Hugs & 💖’s
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oh my gosh Laura, I am so touched by this. thank you dear friends. hugs xox
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My dear friend,
Thank you for sharing your thoughts and words 🙂
When we are honest to ourselves and others, it may sometimes happen that others feel hurt – but it was never our intention to hurt them, if we only have another opinion then them. When a friendship breaks because of different opinions then you can be sure that it was not a true friendship. Just let them go…
We should not make us dependent on the opionion what other people have to say, to fear to harvest critics, to fear not enough to be acknowledged, but we should stay self-centered (not as an egoist) and be what we are. We cannot be what all other people wants us to be, then we would be a split personality.
About fear:
There are many things we are afraid of: Unknown things, situations we are not used to, fear of not to be loved or acknowledged, fear of being lost, fear of death as the biggest fear and many more types of fear. All depends where we put our attention, when putting our attention to fear it is like climbing a mountain and you look down: the deepth will try to swallow you, but when we have our attention in all kind of positive things, mostly in the deep knowledge that God is with us, then fear cannot catch you. So simple it is, but we have to turn our attention then towards positivity. Both cannot stay side by side if we give full attention.
Thanks, my dear friend, you are in my heart
Didi
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Thank you Didi for this insightful comment. You’re so right about that – our attention directs our path. I love that so much. Big hugs to you xox
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Love this! So beautiful and true! You’re such an inspiration!
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thank you so much Elizabeth, what a kind thing to say 🙂 big hugs to you xo
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Yes! You got this exactly right! I also thought your last blog post was great 🙂
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Thanks you so much Kara, I really appreciate that! Hope you have a great night! Hugs and love xox
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Great stuff!
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Thanks so much Jason! Hugs and love xox
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I don’t have the same beliefs you do any longer, but I totally understand your perspective. No matter what our beliefs are, it can be terrifying to be honest and vulnerable about them. Well written!
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Thank you so much Alex! You’re right about that! So grateful for the respect and support it’s been met with. Sending so much love and hugs xox
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Beautifully written! Sharing!
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This was excellent! I have found myself battling fear of the unknown recently. It’s not fun, nor is it necessary. Instead it’s a waste of energy and time. Both of which could be used to focus more on all the positives and be more grateful to God for His abundance in my life. Thank you for this post. 😊👍
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Thank you so much Bekkah! I’m sorry you’ve been going through that. Hang in there. I’ll definitely keep you in my prayers 🙂 Hugs and love xox
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Thank you so much. I’m have to admit that sometimes I let the worries of those I trust to inspire fear in me. But, I feel like the minute I regather my thoughts and surrender my worries to God, something like a warm embrace rushed over me and I know it’s Him giving me a hug and filling me with peace to know it’s all good. 😊
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That’s so beautiful
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I’ve always seen fear as a mask. It hides who we really are or could be. The more we wear it, the more we feel like we are holding back. We need to break free or led to see who we really are. God wants us to shine and be light. In a world where we can easily hide behind so many masks, it is easy to find shelter in comfort. I find that it is necessary to grow by overcoming fear. Love this, rooting for you to keep it up! God bless.
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That’s such an insightful thought. It really is a mask. Thanks for sharing that and for your encouraging words. Hugs and love xox
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You’re welcome. Thank you as well 🙂
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xox 🙂
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You are wonderful the way you are. You share from the heart which is so good.
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Thank you so much friend, that means a lot! Hugs and love xox
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Kalau kau katakan “Saya bisa menyinggung banyak orang. Saya bisa berpotensi melukai beberapa orang, atau membuat mereka merasa tidak nyaman.” Saya rasa tidak ! Ini hanya perasaanmu saja. Mungkin saya diantara sekian orang-orang di blog ini yang paling suka dengan ceritamu ini. Apa lagi kau me ngupas tentang dirimu sesuatu yang sangat pribadi, prinsip secara terbuka.
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💛
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Good on you for being so brave and writing what needed to be said. Your courage is inspirational to so many, so never under-estimate that. Virginity is not a taboo subject and bringing it into the open is remarkable. Be proud of how you are and what you stand for.
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Thank you so much for your kind words of encouragement. It really means a lot! Hugs and love xox
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If you say “I can offend many people. I can potentially harm some people, or make them feel uncomfortable.” I do not think so ! This is just your feeling. Maybe I’m among the people on this blog who like this story the most. What’s more, you peel yourself about something very personal, an open principle.
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Thank You friend for this encouragement. Yeah, I was definitely just stating my own personal feelings, and not trying to pass judgement on any other decisions or ways of life! 🙂 appreciate you stopping by! Hugs and love xox
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