Washing Feet and A Recognition

Posted on by beautybeyondbones

It just so happens that tonight’s post is quite timely. So I invite you to take a little journey with me.

I received word today, on Holy Thursday before Easter, that my blog was named by HealthLine, (a USA Today top-ranked health information provider with 125 million followers) as their #3 ranked “Best Eating Disorder Recovery” Blog of 2019, behind only NEDA and ED-Hope – which are two incredible organizations. I am humbled, grateful and truly blessed by the recognition.

So thank you, to HealthLine, and thank you to you, reading this — for allowing me to share my story, and joining me on the journey to new life.

This recognition comes at a rather interesting moment.

Allow me to set the scene. I’m on my computer reading the Gospel from Holy Thursday Mass in preparation for the post. And I had just finished the passage of Jesus washing the disciples’ feet, when I got the email notification, informing me that I had been recognized by HealthLine.

Of course, I’m ecstatic. I call my parents. We do a little group hug over the phone. And then I get back my computer, and what is still up on my screen? But John 13: 13-15…

Photo: Passion of the Christ

So when Jesus had washed their feet and put His garments back on and reclined at table again, He said to them,
“Do you realize what I have done for you? …
If I, therefore, the master and teacher, have washed your feet, you ought to wash one another’s feet. I have given you a model to follow, so that as I have done for you, you should also do.“

Let me first start out by saying that I am not equating myself to Christ. Let’s get that out of the way. No way, José.

Never in my wildest dreams, would I have thought that I would share about my anorexia on the Internet – or in a book! Never in my life would I have thought that I’d share about all the invasively personal and honest things on here — I mean, I’ve freaking shared about my menstrual history and my virginity for crying out loud!

But I’ve pretty much shed every single layer of who I am, and have exposed the vulnerable, broken mess of a human, out here on this blog. And for better or for worse, you’ve come along for the ride.

But why? Why have I shared things that have caused me embarrassment? The loss of friendships? Potential employment opportunities?

It is because Jesus washed my feet.

Photo: Passion of the Christ

I’ve shared with abandon that the sole, determining factor of my recovery was fully realizing that my eating disorder was one of the nails that pinned Jesus to the Cross. It was realizing that He died to set me free from that, and to pay my debt. He took it on. He forgave me of it.

And for this HealthLine news to be coming in on Holy Thursday, as He’s washing their feet and preparing to die on the cross – the foundation of my recovery, and purpose for this blog – it is just so incredibly timely. Miraculous timing, you could say.

I wasn’t too broken for Jesus. My crimes weren’t unforgivable. My past wasn’t too dirty. The guilt and shame that I had been carrying around because of my anorexia — because of the manipulation, and deception and lying and destruction — all the shit that goes along with an eating disorder — none of it was too much for Jesus to handle.

He is greater. And He took it on. And humbled Himself to die on a Cross.

But before He did, on that Holy Thursday night, He knelt down and washed the feet of His disciples, and instructed them to go and do the same for others.

And that is precisely what I pray this blog has done. I don’t have much to offer in this life…but I do have my story. I do have the testimony of the incredible saving grace of Jesus. Jesus, the source of my recovery. The foundation of my life. And the purpose behind why I so very frequently embarrass the crap out of myself for free on the internet.

Photo: Passion of the Christ

It is because it matters. You matter. Your heart matters. And if the only way I can wash your feet is to offer hope to those who are walking a road I’ve already travelled…then that’s exactly what I’m going to do.

So how incredibly meaningful that this recognition came in on Holy Thursday, of all days.

I have never done this blog for “the numbers.” My motto has been, and always will be, that if I’ve helped even one person, it is worth it. Admittedly, sometimes I struggle with feeling inadequate, or like I’m just spinning my wheels. But I think this was just a little nudge from the Father to keep at it, and keep sharing.

There is no place more desolate than the mind of a hopeless person, trapped in the cycle of anorexia or another addiction.

But there is hope. There is always a way out. There is always always hope. And it is found in the freedom won by the Cross. I pray that my life is a big, messy example of that.

Have a blessed, Easter friends.

“This is what the Lord says to these bones: I will make breath enter you, and you will come to life.” Ez 37:5

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beautybeyondbones

BBB: Because we're all recovering from something. // For speaking/business inquiries: beautybeyondbones@yahoo.com

198 thoughts on “Washing Feet and A Recognition”

    1. Hi Pastor Alan, thank you for such kind words. God is so good and I and so grateful to Him for saving my life! Hugs and love xox

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  2. I am so happy for you. What a blessing. You are obviously touching others and giving them hope. It is wonderful to be able to help even one person. I love your honesty. Your loving spirit and your love for Christ and our Lord and his promise is a blessing as well. Thank you for your kind heart and what you do. With love from one sister to another.

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    1. Hi Joni! Oh my gosh I am so touched by your generous words. Thank you. God is so good and I owe Him my life! Big hugs to you sister! 🙂 Xox

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  4. I rejoice and give thanks that God has used (and continues to use!) your witness so abundantly. To have your blog recognized in a field that is not “automatically” Christian is the Lord opening a door in his love for those who struggle.

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    1. Thank you so much:) I owe Him my life and it brings me so much joy to share! I appreciate your kind words! Hugs and love xox

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  5. Congratulations on being named #3! It must be a high honor. 🙂 And thank you for continuing to share the message of God’s love and grace through the cross.

    PS> I asked my church small group if they’d like to share the love by actually washing each other’s feet. All of them were pretty much: “Hey man, I love you all, but no one’s touching my feet. It’s too gross.” LOL

    XOXO

    PPS> I can’t help but share my favorite movie quote: “There are no points for 2nd place.” LOL Seriously though, congrats!

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    1. Thank you so much!! Haha – yeah My favorite mass is the Holy Thursday service where the priest washes out feet. It is so beautifully humble. And haha!! Love the movie quote!! 🙂 Hugs and love xox

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  6. You wrote, “I am not equating myself to Christ. Let’s get that out of the way. No way, José.” While you may not want people to think that you are, perhaps you should. Remember Jesus came to be one of us, that we might be one with Him. Τετέλεσται
    Pax, jbt

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    1. Hi jbt, this is a really great point. You’re so right – WWJD – we are supposed to follow after Him and try to live our lives the way He did. that’s a powerfu perspective, thank you 🙂 hugs xo

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  7. “But there is hope. There is always a way out. There is always always hope. And it is found in the freedom won by the Cross. I pray that my life is a big, messy example of that.”
    Amen, Caralyn. Praise Jesus, that He took on the wrath we deserved. The fact that we have hope in a world so broken and hopeless is incredible– for some reason it reminds me of the hopelessness of Sol Pais, the 18 year old who wanted to shoot up high schools and ended up committing suicide. No Jesus, no hope.

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    1. Amen, there is always hope. What a tragic situation, my prayers are with her loved ones. So tragic. The world needs Jesus. hugs xo

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    1. Hey Laura! aw, thank you so much!! happy Easter to you as well, I hope you have a beautiful and meaningful weekend. big hugs xo

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  12. “I wasn’t too broken for Jesus.”

    Wow. That’s the power and beauty and hope of the gospel right there.

    None of us are too broken.

    And He doesn’t leave us in our brokenness, in our messiness, in our pain, in our deadness. I’m reminded of your recent post where you reminded us of how God brings dry bones back to life.

    You’ve truly blessed me. Thank you. May this Resurrection Sunday bring you much joy!

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    1. Amen to that – that is the hope of Christ!! Amen amen amen! Thank you for your wonderfully kind words 🙂 Hugs and love xox

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    1. Thanks so much friend 🙂 I so agree – God is always so timely with His encouragement. Hugs and love xox

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  14. Wonderful news and perspective! I am so glad you are getting this award and recognition. Foot washing is very meaningful for me because of one experience in particular. I participated in what is known as the “Walk to Emmaus” in my Protestent circles, but Catholics know it as “Curcillo.” Have you ever heard of it? I had the blessing of being a ‘pilgrim’ and later a clergy leader in several ‘Walks.’ There was a special foot-washing ceremony at the end of our instructor training where our leader went from one to the other of 20+ people on her knees and washed one of each person’s feet. It was a profoundly humbling and empowering moment. The whole “Emmaus” experience is unique and inspiring. If there is a “Cursillo” nearby you or anyone else who reads you, I would recommend it highly. Thanks to God for you and your honesty and faith. As always, blessings to you and yours and a very happy Resurrection Day!

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    1. Thank you DT, I appreciate that – Oh wow – I haven’t heard of that, but it sounds incredibly powerful! will have to look into that for next year! big hugs xo

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  16. Awesome insights, B3! I truly admire the love you have for Christ, for how you help others thru your personal story, and your frankness and humility.

    Btw: I just noticed your little “B3” moniker, and I thought “Don’t Be square. B3. (‘B’ Cubed) ” heheh. Cute. ☺

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    1. Thank you so much! Gosh, what a kind thing to say. And haha yes!! Don’t be square! love it!!! have a blessed Easter! hugs xo

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  17. Most sincere congratulations! The Grace of God shows itself through your work! It is a pleasure to read your writings and an inspiration to see what one person can do through such a medium as this. I am sure you will have great success in the future.

    I am an accountant by trade and this sort of thing is interesting to me, and I am sure you are surrounded by wiser advisors and better counsel than I can offer here; nevertheless please forgive this unsolicited advice. You point out that you are ranked on the same list as other organizations and as far as I can tell, you are a solo operation, just a girl with a story, a passion, and the Grace of God making this all happen. Many non-profits have been founded on less. You could use the brand you are building as a launching point to do great things, to help people beyond sharing your story and giving them an inspiration and strength in their own struggles.

    A non-profit could really magnify your reach. Maybe you’re content with the way things are, but I just wanted to let you know you are positioned for growth and you clearly have thousands of people who respect you, support you, and would follow you whatever you end up doing.

    God bless you, and congratulations again.
    AMDG
    -Scoot

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    1. Thank you so much Scoot 🙂 what a kind thing to say – God is good!! and oh my gosh I really appreciate this terrific advice. THANK YOU! I have been praying about how to grow and find a way to support myself through this blog, so I will absolutely be looking into that option. You’re awesome, thank you! I hope you have a blessed Easter. Hugs and love xox Caralyn

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      1. I would be happy to share further thoughts about the non-profit option if you are interested. Today is the (liturgical) 1st anniversary of my conversion so I will be at the vigil tonight to support the next class of prodigal sons and daughters returning home. I will include you in my prayers tonight. You have a blessed Easter as well!

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      2. Oh gosh, thank you for your prayers 🙂 and wow – congrats on your anniversary! that is so SO exciting and wonderful. and just – wow, so awesome. i will certainly be keeping you in my prayers as well!! Happy Easter!

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  21. Wow! Congratulations, Caralyn! What an honor!!!

    Without meaning to be the contrarian, you have a lot to offer in this life. I believe we all have a lot to offer. We all have the ability to love God and others and use that love of God and others to transform more than one may ever realize.

    Happy Easter!!!

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    1. Thank you so much Brendan! You’re kind to say that. And you’re so right! We all have have that wonderful ability!! Hugs and love xox

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  28. Congratulations Caralyn! And how pleased He most definitely is that you would allow Him to speak through you, as He did for the Father. I love that the prayer card you are holding is that of Divine Mercy. “For the sake of His sorrowful passion have mercy on us and on the Whole World.” Fitting indeed for such a joyous occasion as the celebration of your discipleship!! Hugs and blessing to you, dear one

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    1. Thank you so much Dawn Marie! 🙂 I absolutely love the Divine Mercy – amen! It has really seen my family through some tough times! hugs ox

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  30. Congratulations Cara. You more than deserve the recognition. And thank you for always pouring yourself out here. More grace and strength to you.

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  31. Well preached and presented. Your heart is beautiful to see. Motives are everything and people like me get it. Who wants to listen to someone who doesn’t care about them? I’m sick of professionally cold and impersonal articles. I want warmth, heart, personal experience, and some love felt. You embody all of that. Keep it up girl. Don’t ever stop.

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  33. This post is one example of why I shared about you with my EGroup at church. We have some former Catholics and someone asked if I considered Catholics Christians and I said absolutely. I shared how when I read your blogs, I see a sister in Christ who just happens to go to a different house. Your love for Christ, the way you share scripture, it’s so breathtaking!! It makes me want to celebrate because doe so long I didn’t know folks like that within the Catholic Church. It was more family culture versus a relationship with Jesus. That made me sad because – as you know – there is so much more we experience when we dive in for ourselves!!! I love reading your posts, even when we don’t see eye-to-eye on an issues. Thanks for being such a beautiful demonstration of His love walked out here on Earth, Caralyn!

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    1. You are on a reading roll!! and gosh, thank you again for sharing my blog with your EGroup – I am truly, honored. Grateful for you!!!

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