Flipped the Double Bird

I don’t know about you, but sometimes, it feels like life just comes at ya with a 2×4 straight to head, doesn’t it?

OK — wow, Caralyn. Thaaaat’s graphic. Let’s bring it down a couple knotches.

But seriously though.

Allow me to just share with you something rather…outrageous…that happened to me this morning.

It was 9:00am, and I was out on my morning jog. And to be clear, I don’t run the streets of NYC…that’s not only dangerous, but so much stopping and starting with all the stoplights and crosswalks. Instead, I run on one of the numerous jogging trails throughout the city. Very scenic. Very safe. Kapeesh?

Well, part of this jogging trail goes through an open paved lot, of sorts. It’s a wide, open space, shared by pedestrians and cars that are pulling into the covered portion of the parking lot, or picking up/dropping off passengers on the scenic trail. It’s always bustling with joggers — as it was this morning — and very seldom are there any cars in the lot.

So. I’m jogging along, on the edge of the edge of the pedestrian path — as one does when attempting to follow social distancing measures — and this maroon, oversized Dodge truck pulls into the open paved lot. We’re going in opposite directions — read: towards eachother — but there’s probably three car-widths between our non-intersecting, parallel paths. If that makes sense. Basically, there is no way he’d hit me, unless he decided to drastically turn his car, and swerve into the pedestrian pathway. That, and the speed limit is literally 5 mph.

Well. The driver of this truck: he was probably probably about 42 — but looked mid fifties — had this aggressive handlebar mustache, and a look of rage in his eyes like I’ve never seen before. He proceeds to lay on his horn for – I kid you not – probably a full five seconds (which is a lot, if you’re blaring your horn), and then flips me not one, BUT TWO middle fingers!! He took both hands off the wheel to flip me two birds! All before 10am on a Monday morning.

Like, I don’t know who pee’d in his Cheerios, that morning, but — WOW.

I was so startled, and frankly – shaken up – by his complete overreaction to…literally nothing. I looked around, and my fellow joggers were also dumbfounded by the obnoxious scene they had just witnessed. And they all sympathetically shrugged at me, like “Wow, lady. Can you believe that guy?

And I mean…I wasn’t even wearing my “I am Prolife” shirt, so why the rage, buddy?!

But I did the only thing I could: I kept my head down and just kept running.

And on my way home, it dawned on me: 2020 has been just like that Dodge pickup man…came in out of nowhere, blared on its horn, and flipped us the double bird.

Seriously, though!

I’m going to be honest, that episode felt like the appropriate tone my interior life has taken recently. I don’t know if it’s just the election or the uncertainty of the holidays, but I have been feeling rather discouraged. Like, does this even matter? I mean, I had a reader email me recently saying that I was a phony who had “the Devil living inside of [my] twisted and serpentine soul.” Yeah — that was a real joy to read.

But I’ve just had this pang of, “Does this even matter?” Should I just go get my real estate license, or become an esthetician and let this go? I mean, it would sure make finances a whole heck of a lot easier.

I’m not fishing for praise here, I am just sharing something that has been on my heart.

I’m telling you, though. We have a good, good Father. One that not only listens, but also responds.

Fast forward to this afternoon — about two hours after my flipped bird episode. And I’m down in the basement of my apartment building doing my laundry.

I was…actually…wearing my “I am Prolife” shirt, coincidentally, now that I’m realizing it. haha

But I’m folding my sheets, when in walks the newest tenant in my building: a young woman who is suffering from severe anorexia.

Now, I know — it is not polite or kind to “assume” that someone has anorexia. But as someone who nearly died from it, herself…allow me to put it this way: I know it when I see it. I’m not being cruel, I’m not being judgmental or catty…this young woman was suffering from severe anorexia. The type that makes even me catch my breath. I would say she was all of about 84 pounds.

All of the tell-tale signs were there….she was dangerously gaunt, grey skin, wearing two sweaters and yoga pants that were too loose – despite the fact that the laundry room is about 90 degrees with the 25 industrial dryers going.

And I smiled at her, and saw my former self in her hollow, sunken-in eyes, just above her paper mask.

And my heart absolutely broke for this young woman. I had seen her once before — when she was moving in. And, sweet friend — if for some reason, you’re reading this…(crazier things have happened — it’s 2020) — know that I love you, and am here to talk because, I’ve been there.

But seeing this hurting young woman, I knew that God was reminding me that this blog matters.

He was showing me, that there are hurting young women out there — with concerned families and loved ones and friends — who need resources on how to help, and sources of hope and encouragement that complete healing is possible. That things do get better, and that a life of full recovery is not only possible, but that one can thrive after near self-demise.

I mean, I was 78 pounds. I was that girl that walked into a room and made people audibly gasp, thinking they’d seen a ghost. You could feel my frantic and anxious energy – it was palpable. And God saved me from myself, and blessed me with, truly, a second chance.

So yes — I have been given a mission to share my story which points to His saving power — His forgiveness — His mercy. I may not always be able to see it, but God gave me a glimpse this afternoon, that He has children out there who desperately need help. There are ED sufferers out there who are suffering, and if, by the grace of God, one of my posts can offer the small push they need to seek professional help, or work up the courage to open up to a loved one about what they’re going through, or to find the hope that they can stick to their recovery model, or even just that they’re not as hopelessly alone as they think they are, then this blog has done what I set out for it to do, some five years ago.

And that young woman in the laundry room? I have been praying ever since I first saw her, to know precisely how to approach her, or reach her, and ultimately help her. I know that God has put her in my path for a reason. And I long to help her so so much. I just need His guidance on how best to tenderly and appropriately handle such a delicate situation.

But anyways. It’s not even 5:00pm, and I’ve already had quite the rollercoaster of emotions today.

So in closing: both the Dodge pick up man, and that young woman in the laundry room — they are both children of God, and worthy of love and respect, and have a dignity that comes from being made in God’s image. And both of them — just like me, and you, and everyone in this world — have a wound that was on display today: one manifested in rage, one in anorexia. But both wounds ultimately come from the same source: a place in their hearts that needs the life-changing love that only comes from God.

Which reminds me of an instrumental verse that led to the start of this blog: Matthew 5:15 “Let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.”

May we each let our lights shine today — because we never know who we encounter in our daily lives that could really benefit from the warmth and radiance of God’s light and love.

“This is what the Lord says to these bones: I will make breath enter you, and you will come to life.” Ez 37:5


A huge shoutout to Reason Nutrition Beverage! Their all-natural, high calorie drink is not only delicious, but it has no “garbage” in it! Utilizing the wholesome goodness of coconut oil, it’s a phenomenal option for those needing to gain weight in recovery, or for those simply looking to supplement their diet with convenient and fast nutrition. Check them out!

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179 responses to “Flipped the Double Bird”

  1. Great post Caralyn. It shows just the pain and suffering that’s going on. I’m glad that crazy trucker didn’t hit you. The girl suffering from anorexia must’ve felt like a reflection of your past. FYI I put up a important post last night on a key issue. I referenced your story without getting specific. I’ll post a separate reply.

    • thanks Derek, you’re right – i think a lot of us are walking around with a lot more carrying than we let on. we’ve got to live with compassion and love.thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox

      • Caralyn, it sounds like you had one heck of a day. I totally cracked up at your description of his “aggressive handlebar mustache.” You don’t need me to tell you this, but you were not his problem– just a convenient target to receive his rage. But I did feel somewhat angry and upset when you talked about that person sending you a mean [and completely false] email. ‘Phony’ is an antonym for what you are. I appreciate your genuine, kind heart, authenticity, and desire to help others. Even though we are polar opposites in lots of things, I would hope people say the same about me. What makes a person think they can just slide into someone’s inbox and say rude, unsolicited comments?! Just because you are more of a public figure than some doesn’t mean you aren’t a human being with feelings. I’m very sorry you had to deal with that. Keep up the excellent work and don’t ever stop being you!

        ~ Sloane

      • Hi Sloane! oh my gosh thank you so much for the wonderfully encouraging words. Gosh, they touch my heart! And you’re right – that man may have just gone through something awful that morning, who knows. But he definitely needs some compassion and prayer! Thanks for that, yeah the email stung a bit. I had to just remember that you never know the type of day a person is having on the other side of the keyboard, or telephone line, or…pick up truck! thanks for being just awesome, Sloane! I appreciate your friendship so much! have a great evening! Hugs and love xox

      • Wow!

        Look, you really need to approach this young woman you saw. Her life may depend on you being there for her. Here’s an idea. Do you have a picture of yourself at the height of your insanity? If you do, snatch it up and find her. Just say, “Hey, my name’s Caralyn and I saw you the other day in the laundry room doing clothes. I just want to share something with you.”

        Show her the picture without saying anything. Let her react. If she’s quiet, you can say “I’ve been where you are now. I understand. I want to be your friend.”

        Just my .02, for what it is worth. She may blow you off, or she may disolve into tears. You don’t know. I know it will take a certain bravery on your part. None of us like to step out like that.

        I’ll try to remember you in my prayers.

      • Wow, that is a powerful idea! thank you so much – i do have a photo. I haven’t looked at it in years and years, but i could get it out. it’s actually on my phone. What a powerful gesture, thank you for sharing that idea. You’re right – i just never know how it will impact her! glad you stopped by! Hugs and love xox

  2. He is good and will give you the words that young lady needs and will impress upon your heart when the time comes to reach out to her. I pray for that young lady and have no doubt He put her in your building and in your path for a reason. ❤️🙏🏻

    • Thank you Judith – I do trust that God will guide my words when the time comes. thank you for your prayers. it means a lot, and there surely is power in prayer! Hugs and love xox

  3. Your combination of street smarts and Godly guidance provides light on the pathway of life. As found in Proverbs 3:5-6, trusting in the Lord with all our heart will provide a straight pathway. Leaning on our own understanding will bring confusion and incorrect navigation. It’s obvious you have learned to trust the Lord with all your heart. Thanks for your sacrificial effort in sharing your blog.

    • oh gosh, thank you so much – and you’re absolutely right! When we trust Him wholeheartedly, He will direct our paths. glad you stopped by! Hugs and love xox

  4. Well said. Keep your faith in people to be good, as most people are good. Yes we struggle and it is at this moment that we need our Loving, Compassionate God the most. You are correct, we need to lift these people in prayer. Stay safe and know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. Hugs to you.

    • Thank you HJ! You’re right – there is power in prayer, and we must pray for one another! i really appreciate your prayers and encouragement. know that you’re in mine too 🙂 Hugs and love xox

  5. I am a power walker and I got “the horn”the other day. It’s a pain, I hear you. So I changed my route.
    The other piece of your post, anorexia, isn’t my issue, but we can get lost and sick, in plenty of ways, running away from God. Alcohol, drugs, sex, politics all serve to foster our narcissism and self-importance.
    “I am The Way,” Jesus said. Upon hearing this, almost all of us go out there to prove Him wrong.
    This is why His Holy Church exists, to take us back to school. We have to remember that, all of us, those of us at the altar, and those of us in the pews.
    Love ya, Girl.
    Rant over.

    • Hi David, thank you so much for sharing your thoughts. Isn’t it so jarring when you get the horn!?! You’re so right – we all stray in different ways, but The Way out is the same for all: Jesus! thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox

    • you’re so right about that! God is always working to give His children exactly what they need, when exactly they need it. thanks for being such a positive source of encouragement. big hugs to you xox

  6. We are all given gifts and talents. Once they are revealed to us, we find that if we begin to move within them, our lives are transformed. We find fulfillment and purpose..meaning.
    What you do, you have a talent for and the path that led you here is the gift of beauty beyond the bones.
    It’s my experience that when things seem to coming at you hard, bringing you down and causing you to question yourself…it’s just the darkness before the light. Something powerful is about to happen for you or in your life.
    Remember in the darkness, what you know in the light. You are where you belong. You have been given gifts, talents and a purpose, in the Lord. You are a healing voice in the world and a light of faith.
    Hugs sweet girl.

    • Hi laura, thank you so much for sharing your thoughts on this. you’re so right – we must remember in the darkness what we know in the light – that is so so true. and it is in those moments that God is right about to transform our lives! gosh, i am so touched by your beautiful encouragement. thank you. you are a blessing to me! Hugs and love xox

  7. Big hugs! I pray and feel sure that God is going to use you to witness to that girl that needs healing! Don’t let the devil get ya down! <3

    • Hi PK! aw, thank you for the hugs and prayers – that means so much. I agree — I am just praying for His timing to talk to her. It is a delicate situation, but I trust God’s plan! thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox

  8. I’m sorry that happened to you. I think this is something that’s been building for quite a few years. You can see it in the faces of people as they walk down the street; you can see it in how they drive or how they act in stores. And I think the lockdowns we are going through only make things worse. Keep your head up and keep smiling!

    • Thanks so much Joe! You’re right – there’s been a building anger, and it’s sad to see it play out. big hugs to you 🙂 Hugs and love xox

  9. Caralyn, I also struggled with anorexia a number of years ago. Interestingly my low weight was also 78. I looked like a skeleton girl and people stared at me everywhere I went. But nobody talked to me about it. Anorexia was the elephant in the room that nobody talked about. Not that I would have listened…..

    I don’t think people knew what to say. And I find that I don’t know what to say either when I come across someone who seems to obviously have anorexia. You’re right….it’s a very delicate situation.

    I appreciate your blog and your openness about your struggle. Only heaven will tell the story of how many have been helped. ❤️

    • Hi Eirene, thank you so much for sharing your story. You’re right – it’s one of those situations where people don’t know how to address it. the elephant in the room, just like you said. thank you so much for your wonderful encouragement. truly, it means the world. and i’ m so glad to hear that you’ve found beautiful freedom from such an insipid disease!! Sending so much love and hugs xox

  10. Great article! So much good meat on those word bones today. Thank you for wearing a pro-life t-shirt, btw. That’s beautiful!

    Please keep writing these wonderful posts that are inspirational and encouraging. I feel like your blog is a light on a right path.
    Please stay blessed, healthy, and safe. Blessings!

    • Thank you Susan! I’m so glad it resonated with you! hahah oh yes – gotta rep the prolife shirt when I can! hahahah i really appreciate your encouraging words. it means so much. have a beautiful night! Hugs and love xox

  11. Yes, you matter. Yes, what you do on here matters. A lot. So sorry for the first buckaroo, but maybe God used him to set you up for the second one, the one who really needed you to see her. Others could only guess at it, but you REALLY saw her. I’ll join you in praying for her and for a chance for you to interact with her. You may be the catalyst God uses to reach her.

    As to the unease and discouragement, I understand. I’m grateful He let you see the good you’re doing. I’m sure whatever God has for you, this blog will be a part of it. But maybe He’s starting to tell you something. Just get closer to Him, spend more time with Him, read His word as much as possible, and keep your eyes open. He’ll tell you when He’s ready. 🙂

    • Aw, Kenneth, you’re the best. thank you my friend. I do trust that God is always working, and always uses everything – even bird flippers – for good! so glad you stopped by! Hugs and love xox

  12. This is a simple case of the moronicity of the Dodge driver being inversely proportional to the overreactionicity of same. It’s impressive that your doing NOTHING to deserve a double bird nevertheless resulted in a double bird being offered. That gives the driver a 5 multiplier for degree of stupidity. Carry on my dear. Your work for the Kingdom is recognized by the King.

    • Thanks Glenn for sharing your thoughts on this. Gosh I’m so touched by your encouraging words. I know – that is what I thought too — OVERREACT MUCH?! haha thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox

  13. Do not feel sad or anxious. Life has many happy and sad situations except with the truck driver or with others.
    Because this is the world, we must strive, be patient, and endure until we reach the optimum level of the satisfaction of God Almighty, which is Paradise in and which is outside the boundaries of this world.
    You have the right to wear appropriate sportswear. Walking, this is your life and your privacy, and you live in the most beautiful city in the world, New York.
    Thank you, beautiful and wonderful article, and you are also beautiful and wonderful, and you emotional and mental clarity towards humans. I pray to God to explain your heart to the truth and the right path, and to choose the religion that suits your heart. Greetings

  14. Everyone deals with the stress of 2020 in a different way, but the pickup truck driver chose the wrong way to exhibit his stress. I would not want to be in his path if I was interfering with his progress, if he reacts this way over nothing. I live in an area with a high concentration of pickup trucks and I am not sure if the truck gives a feeling of power or emphasizes a shortage of common sense. And you should see the reactions when they see me…in a Prius….in front of them. Either way, we all need to be more accommodating and more kind so that we can get through this current situation. Stay well. Allan

    • You’re right about that, Allan, we’re all coping in different ways. Yes – kindness goes a long way. Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox

    • Thank you Aaron for your kind words and prayers. Gosh I’m humbled by your generous affirmation. God is good. Hugs and love xox

  15. We never know what others are going through it have on their minds. That is why we must always be Christ like no matter what. Best thing we can do is pray for them. Them seeing us not acting out towards them will show them just how mercy looks like.

    • You’re so right Desiray! You’re all fighting silent battles. So true – there is power in prayer. Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox

  16. There’s a Christian song on the radio that I’ve heard recently that speaks to this post. It asks why does kindness seem revolutionary? It asks why do we let hate get so ordinary? And it asks what would Jesus do? The answer: He would love first. Do everything in love and the word will see the light of Christ and know that it is good. Thank you for this post Caralyn! And thank you for sharing your story with the world and letting us see your light for Christ. May God bless you and keep you!

    • Hi Todd – oh wow – revolutionary kindness. I love that thought so much. And you’re right – He would love first. Thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox

  17. Thank you for sharing this. I will also be praying for the young woman and for you to hear the Lord on how to touch her life. God bless.❤️

  18. Good Word miss… and yes your blog is very important and relevant. May the Lord continue to use all your experiences for His glory and to keep you pressing for Him… praying with you for the young lady in your building… Blessings

    • thank you friend – i appreciate those encouraging words. joining you in that important prayer! sending big hugs xox

  19. Stay with me while I come out of left field. I had a meeting with a customer a few years ago, and there was a NAPA official there for this huge meeting. I’d never met him before. He interrupted me every chance he got and lied through his teeth at several turns. He finally wrapped up and “yielded the floor” with a magnanimous smile.

    I proceeded to blow him up, exposing his lies with facts. Every time he tried to stop me I firmly told it’s my turn to talk, his to be quiet. When I finally wrapped it up, he leaned over to me and said, “If you keep this up, I’m going to stop liking you.” I smiled back and delivered the coup de grace:

    “It’s cute that you think I care.”

    Would that qualify as a mic drop?

    When some guy in a pickup you’ve never seen before lays on the horn and flips you off, he obviously wants to convey how much he hates you. Use the same response – It’s cute that he thinks you care what he thinks.

    When you said 2020 has been like him, I laughed out loud, so thanks for that!

    I will be praying for you to hear God’s whisper on how to help that young lady. Might I suggest you try to chat her up the next time you see her – anything but ED. Look for an opening somewhere in the conversation to talk hobbies, mention B3. Just spit-balling here for you.

    You’re not looking for praise, but I’ll give you some anyway. You are vibrant young woman who is very important to me. You touched my heart from the first time I read you (I finally figured out why – we’ll talk sometime). You’ve inspired me, been gracious in letting me support your ministry, and generally been a great friend. I know B3 is instrumental as we discovered from your live feeds from CTK. Brilliant! I know you’ll help thousands more. Basement girl? We’ll see. I’ll tell you what I’ve told my daughters on occasion – don’t try; just relax into it. Whatever the “it” is. Make sense?

    • hey Jeff! oh i love that – “It’s cute that you think I care” — dang that is DEFINITELY a mic drop if i’ve ever heard one! thank you for that awesome perspective shift! and haha glad that one line gave you a laugh! thank you for the prayers – i will be praying too. i think you’re onto something – anything but ed — B3 will come up eventually and if i have a trust and friendship, that will be a much smoother transition. and oh my gosh, Jeff – you are just too kind. THANK YOU for such generous and affirming words. you are such a good friend. 🙂 and gosh, you are always just brimming with fantastic advice — don’t try just relax into it. isn’t that true for so many things in life? from intimidating conversations with cute guys, to high stress business meetings, to conversations in the basement laundry room! i value your insight more than you know, Jeff. SIncerely, thank you. hope you and your girls are having a great week so far. hugs xox

      • I’m glad you found my comments useful! Sometimes I hit send and start wondering if I should’ve kept my mouth shut! I just got back from Mississippi after an overnight. Being back home always improves my week! We are well here I trust you are the same. STAY SAFE!

      • Yes! Absolutely!! Oh wow – well I hope you enjoy a much deserved relaxing evening!!! I bet it does! Yes, you too!! Hugs and love xox

    • Aside from the blog post above, this comment is the best thing I’ve read today! “It’s cute that you think I care.” Hahaha! I’m keeping that. Stick it on my car dashboard along with my daughter’s phrase, “Maybe they just found out they have cancer.”

  20. A few years ago, I received the bird from a car close to me driving down the highway through town. And on my birthday no less! To me, this is a Badge of Honor. Keep truckin’!

    • Hi H – on your birthday?!!? oh that is just awful. but you’re right – badge of honor! haha thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox

  21. Thank you for sharing. I’m glad you’re okay. I saw Hilaria Baldwin’s IG post this morning who broke her ankle because a car passed fast on the road where she was running. Apparently, this has been happening everywhere 😔

    • Thanks friend. Oh my gosh! That’s awful to hear! Got to be extra careful! Glad you stopped by!! Hugs and love xox

  22. NY has always had its dangerous element and the pandemic and recent election certainly haven’t helped raw nerves all around. Not sure why you and my grand daughter choose to live in the city now but I’m putting you on my prayer list so the angels continue to provide you safety. Your blog is a helpful mission to those struggling with eating disorders so keep following this mission.

    • Hi Ian, thank you for sharing your thoughts on this! and thanks for your prayers! for as dangerous and expensive as nyc is, i definitely know the appeal your granddaughter has seen too: it has (or at least, it HAD) a pulse, and energy, and a vibe to it like no where else! the people are fascinating and it’s a lot of fun too! and thank you for such kind words about my blog! it really means a lot! Hugs and love xox

  23. You matter. Your blog is an amazing testament to the grace and glory of God. You are shining bright. As an older Christian woman it is a great blessing to read of the vibrant faith of a young girl in NYC! That guy in the Dodge had no idea where God is or how to find him. I’ll pray he does. You cover the girl in the laundry room and what more can we do for one day? Who knows? Have you checked out Eric Metaxas yet? He’s written a few really good books, Bonhoefer, and Martin Luther’s biography’s for starters. I’d love to see him interview you. Who knows?

    • Oh Amy, you are just too kind, thank you so much for these generous words! yes – i pray that Mr. Dodge Man can find God as well – that anger was obviously coming from a deep place of hurt. Eric Metaxas — I haven’t had a chance to yet, but he is definitely on my list! oh my gosh, wouldn’t that be an honor to be interviewed by him!! thanks for stopping by! have a wonderful afternoon! Hugs and love xox

    • oh gosh, thank you for saying that. i am seriously so touched. God bless you. Hugs and love xox

  24. It’s amazing isn’t it? I have been saying for some time now how much 2020 sucks, having lost family and pets, no work, staying cooped up, being lonely, etc. etc. But, I’m walking at least 4 miles a day and waving at my neighbors from far away and it’s improved my attitude tremendously. They too are walking for something to do, so it’s actually turning into quite a cool thing. Young and old wave and shout out intro’s and it’s all good.
    As for the young lady, I am certain God will find a way for you to connect. I know a connection will have to be made before you can help. Have you said hello yet? I know NY’ers are not prone to gabbing with strangers, but you can pretend you’re not a native? With my southern drawl, there’d be no doubt and I’m a yakker to boot. lol
    As for the guy in the truck, well, none of knows what happened to him prior to the incident and a prayer for him certainly won’t hurt. I wish you well on both counts.

    • Hi Jolie! Oh wow – it sounds like you’ve definitely found a beautiful silver lining of 2020! i’m so happy for you!!! i agree – I’ve put it in God’s hands, and I trust He will present the right opportunity. And you’re right- prayers all the way around! thanks for stopping by and always being such a bright source of positivity in my life! 🙂 Hugs and love xox

    • thank you friend. Yeah, I was pretty stunned, honestly. I’m not saying I’m a saint, but I mean…wow…you just don’t say that to a person!! It is incredibly cruel and mean spirited. I’ve added the sender to my prayer list…thanks so much for stopping by and for the support! Hugs and love xox

  25. Anger and pain seem to be on the rise, which is why your blog is such an important light. You help so many. You help because God helped you, not because you get something from it other than the peace of mind you helped back. Make sense? Anger and pain are going to keep increasing until we get to Heaven, just the way it is, it is in the Book. Makes your light that much brighter, and I for one need you to blog more not less because it is such a source of sorely needed encouragement. Don’t stay discouraged, stay prayerful when discouragement hits. Focus makes all the difference. You help ma and I love you, as always, my sweet, beautiful friend. Hugs! XoXO😄❤

    • Hi Tonya, my dear friend! I agree – it is so sad to see so many people hurting. Every week, the line at the soup kitchen in my neighborhood gets longer and longer. And gosh – what incredibly kind and generous words about my blog. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. You’re right – God rescued me and gave me a second chance at life, and I must pay it forward. And you’re right – only in Heaven will there be true peace and fulfillment. Thank YOU for shining your light! I am blessed by it every week! sending so much love and hugs! love you!! xoxo

  26. I always appreciate your honest, insightful and religious perspective that shines through your posts. They really do help me aspire and try to be more honest about my own religious and spiritual views to others and try to focus on what my beliefs are. 2020 has in many ways flipped the double bird (I chuckle when I see that phrase)to many people this year. But in many ways I see that 2020 has also been a wake-up call to everybody all over the world and taken away the mask from the more ugly side of the way that we lived our so called everyday “normal” lives, and how we would “normally “ treat people and planet or place we live.

    For example the way we polluted out sky’s with “normal” air travel and the impact a pandemic has had on that. As well as the way we treated our own bodies with so called “normal” over and under eating and the impact a pandemic has had on those eating habits and the consequences for our health, where hopefully people and governments can now start to learn and be given greater opportunities in the future to look after and strive to look and focus on our health and empower us or even inspire us to be better human beings too.

    Your site has certainly helped me walk down a dangerous path or two this year with my mental health and also inspired me to speak out and do a blog of my own and although the stance that I believe my battle scarred body, brain and soul give to me are different from yours in a number of ways, that does not stop me from being inspired by and learn from you. So I for one am grateful for the words you type, the views you hold and I know there are many who think the same. I hope that life does not “flip the double bird” to you too often and I look forward to seeing what insights it gives to you when it does. Take care and I hope God continues to bless you.

    • Hi friend – thank you so much for your kind words about my blog — it truly touches my heart. And i love your perspective about 2020 — it really has been a wake up call that has produced a lot of good change!!! I am grateful for you, friend. Sending so much love and hugs xoxo

  27. Thank you for writing this.

    I sometimes wonder if I’m making a difference. And, to be honest, I’m feeling pretty discouraged right now. The COVID news is really bad here all of a sudden, and the state arbitrarily changed all the rules again, and people are hoarding and panic buying again, and the people in charge are saying life will never be the way it was again and we’ll have to wear masks and stay 6 feet apart forever. More and more I just want to give up. I don’t want to live like this.

    But maybe I am making a difference after all. A teenager in Australia who follows me on here complimented my writing… even if I’m just providing a semi-fictional world where one reader can enjoy escaping to for a bit each week, that’s something good. And of course there’s my job… even if it only helps me reach a few people, it makes a difference for them. (I think you know what kind of work I do… I don’t share that openly on WordPress anymore so as not to give away spoilers for future posts.)

    I had an interesting experience recently; I can’t remember if I told you about this. Basically, I was watching a video of a minor celebrity whose work I’ve been familiar with since high school; he mentioned something that had gotten a lot of negative comments from conservatives and Trump supporters, and he reached out and invited conservatives to email him and explain where we’re coming from and why we believe what we do, so he can understand us better in the name of unity and kindness. So I did. And three weeks later (yesterday), he finally wrote back. I wrote again, he wrote back again, and it’s been a really interesting conversation so far (not to mention kind of surreal, because I’m talking about difficult things with someone somewhat famous). But having those kinds of conversations and being willing to listen to people different from oneself is the only way we’re going to heal as a nation. And I may not be able to solve everything, but I can make a difference by sharing and listening.

    And the fact that you reply to every comment on here individually, that makes a difference. I feel comfortable writing this kind of long comment to you because I know you’ll read it.

    I hope you and your neighbor have the opportunity to talk soon. Keep us posted.

    • Hi Greg! oh wow, thank you for this awesome encouragement about my blog. that means a lot. i feel you there – the COVID news has certainly become much more acutely negative here recently. I do trust that we can find some semblence of normal, especially with the new vaccines on the horizon. And that is wonderful about the dialogue with that guy! you’re absolutely right- bridges are built when we can have a respectful, open, honest dialogue. I’m sure you are giving him some great food for thoguht, and vice versa! that’s SO awesome! sharing and listening are what’s going to heal this nation for sure. glad you stopped by! Hugs and love xox

  28. Thank you for sharing this. You are not alone – I have felt incredibly discouraged this year myself, and I totally feel for you when you ask, “does any of this matter?” I’m so sorry to hear about the truck driver, and it’s very unfortunate that he had to take out his rage on you.

    I think this year has been harder than we could have ever imagined. Today, I found out that one of my students and his family became homeless. This pandemic has affected us in ways that are completely unfair, and I think now more than ever, we have to extend compassion and grace, not only to others but also to ourselves.

    – Katie

    • hi Katie! Oh thank you for this powerful encouragment. you’re right – i don’t think anyone could have foreseen what was coming in 2020 — especially with the “15 DAYS to slow the spread.” that was wishful thinking. oh my gosh, i am so sorry to hear about your student’s situation! i will absolutely be keeping him and his family in my prayers. it’s so sad. people are really being hit hard by everything. every week, the line at the soup kitchen in my neighborhood gets longer and longer. It breaks my heart to see so many people hurting. Compassion and grace — amen. so glad you stopped by. stay well, my friend. Hugs and love xox

    • Hi Gerry! You’re so right about that — when we are doing God’s will, things fall into place, and we’re filled with peace! so glad you stopped by! Hugs and love xox

  29. As the owner of a Dodge Pickup, I’m highly offended that someone would even do that to you and use my class of vehicle to do it. I mean, you expect such from a Ford or Chevy driver… #Joke.

    Reading about the new tenant in your building, it is sad than someone is going through that. But I think that God has brought someone into your life for you to bless. You need to be a bit more bold and talk to her. Don’t tell her that she is suffering from an eating disorder. Like you have said, many times those who have it, don’t even recognize it.
    But I would say that you be bold enough to enter her life. Introduce yourself and begin a friendship with her. It may save her life, physically and spiritually. You recognize the disease.
    Take the lesson of Matthew 25:34 – 46..

    • hahha too funny!!! I know — my dad owns a Ford, so….Chevy drivers for sure!!! hahahha juuuust kidding. thanks for the smile. 🙂 And I agree – i totally trust that God placed this young woman in my path for a reason. Not to mention we are practically the only people under 35 that live in my building, so that in itself could be a great starting point for a friendship! 🙂 thanks for the awesome encouragment. you’re right – Matthew 25. leave it to God to provide us just what we need! have a wonderful afternoon. Hugs and love xox

  30. Great post as always. To connect with the young woman in the laundry room, don’t make it complicated, just say hi, and build the relationship from there. Talk about the heat of the place, where did you get that jumper, etc. It’s so easy to overthink things and end up saying nothing.

    Naturally, over one or two meetings, the conversation will lead to your blog, or at least allow you to mention it. Then if she wants to, she may talk to you about it or better still check it out and find a world of helpful information. 🙂

    • aw, thank you so much – i think you’re so right – just strike up a friendship. God will present the right opportunity, but in the meantime, just get to know her! you’re absolutely right — don’t overthink it! that’s a great idea – the blog is a pretty natural and seamless entry point! 🙂 hope oyu’re having a great week so far. thanks for stopping by! Hugs and love xox

    • Thank you so much my friend. God’s Word will never lead us astray! have a great evening! Hugs and love xox

  31. Caralyn, you are an inspiration to many. never doubt that. Remember what God said to Moses, “now, therefore, go, and I will be with your mouth and teach you what you shall speak” (Exodus 4:12), words that Jesus later reiterated to the Apostles when He said, “do not be anxious about how or what you are to answer or what you are to say; for the Holy Spirit will teach you in that very hour what you are to say” (Luke 12:11-12).

    • Hi Amy, oh my gosh, THANK YOU for such generous and kind words about my blog. i am seriously so touched. So true – God is always in control and will give us just what we need to do His will. I love the saying that God doesn’t call the equipped, but equips the called! amen! have a great evening! Hugs and love xox

  32. Caralyn, your posts are a spiritual delight for this 79 year old Louisianan. God is still present in America as is evidenced by young folks like you. Blessings and peace.

    • Hi Al! oh my gosh what a kind thing to say! seriously, thank you – I am so touched. Yes! God is alive in the hearts of so many in this country. We must all let our lights shine! God bless you, my friend! Hugs and love xox

  33. Your light, is very much shining, young lady. 😊😇. And may the Good, Good, Fathers Angels, watch over you. And may he allow you, to speak into this girls life, both physically & spiritually, with the Love of Jesus.

    • oh my goodness, thank you so much for such kind words. Yes! And may they watch over you, too! i have total and complete trust that God will give me the words, and the right opportunity to speak with this young woman and form a friendship! sending so much love and hugs xox

  34. Wow! You have had or had quite a day. I’m so proud of you not responding to anger or whatever that was in the truck. God put you in both places. Both need prayer. God is using you in a mighty way. Our words on these blogs matter. God whisks them through cyberspace and they land on the people that need them most. Keep up the good (God) job. Don’t worry. God will give you the perfect time place and words to witness to the young lady in the laundry room. Until then, continue to pray for both of the people God set in your path. They were put there for a reason. Blessing and Peace to you, VICTORIA

    • Hi Victoria! oh my gosh, thank you so much – you’re right – both need prayer. The good God job! I love that! and you’re absolutely right – God will work everything together with timing, and will give me the words that will resonate in her heart. I trust that!! so glad you stopped by! Hugs and love xox

  35. Sorry I recognised a girl had anorexia. I just spoke to her and smiled. I was just friendly and prayed for God to help her and he has. It makes me happy every time I see her looking relaxed and healthy now.

    • Hahaha oh my gosh I’ve never heard that joke about mustaches…only…excuse me, I mustache you a question! Haha thanks for stopping by, Tony!! Hugs and love xox

  36. Unconscious men do not know the power they have (systemically) when they become startled / fearful especially while driving – this can go to rage in a nano-second. They may not have any idea the affect that their rage has on women – especially. The current climate of social behaviors in America and the world where our leaders give permission for rage to flourish have naturally fueled the divisiveness of our culture.

    When Trump became President-Elect a woman who had been waiting for the bus by the curb was nearly run over by unruly young men in a jacked-up pick-up truck driving over the curb trying to hit her. She looked “different” and was socially “delayed” – maybe slightly autistic and yelled explicates at her. She was living at a crisis mental health facility where I worked at the time. She handled herself well and was able to process her feelings with me.

    It was clear to me that – as a nation – we could expect more of these kinds of behaviors due to the role-modelling of our president. I wrote a longer piece on “Men, Anger, and Rage in the Toxic Patriarchy” https://psychesweather.wordpress.com/2019/09/27/men-anger-and-rage-in-the-toxic-patriarchy/

    I am proud of you that you acted in a responsible way when you were dumped on by this man venting his rage on you. Good (God) for you.

    • Hi Kai, oh wow thanks for that insight! Yeah rage is being seen more and more these days. Oh gosh that makes me so sad! That poor woman!! Thank you for writing on the topic. I look forward to reading your post. Thanks for passing it along. Hugs and love xox

  37. Proud of you for not retaliating evil with evil. Jesus never did, even when His enemies tortured Him to death. Our normal reaction is to lash out against those who insult us. The hardest thing for a Christian to do is to “love our enemies.” You did a lot better in that situation than I would’ve, I guarantee. You truly are a light on a hilltop, kiddo.

    • Thanks so much Rollie for your kind words. You’re right – we are called to love our enemies. Easier said than done!! Glad you stopped by! Hugs and love xox

  38. Wow, forgiveness is soooo hard! Believe me, I know! Lewis said, “To be a Christian means to forgive the inexcusable because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you.” (C.S.Lewis, The Weight of Glory) See also https://capost2k.wordpress.com/2018/09/23/forgive-me-umm-excuse-me-one-more-time/.
    And keep on blogging, girl! You minister to more than just ED folks!
    love and prayers (every time the Master and I “walk” through NY 😉 ) c.a.

    • You’re right about that, c.a! Forgiveness is tough!! Thank you so much for your kind words about my blog. It seriously means so much! Have a wonderful evening! Hugs and love xox

  39. Life’s situations are God’s initiations, a classic one liner that resonates true more each passing day. When we experience hopelessness God gives us an opportunity to give hope to the truly hopeless of this world. “Faithful is he who has called you, who will also do it” 1 Thess 5:24 let God do what He has called you to do, He truly does it if we give Him the situation. Keep writing

    • Thanks so much Chad – you’re right – God will give us the tools we need to do His will. Hugs and love xox

  40. I love this post and your day!! I mean that’s God for you! Getting flipped off one minute and the next a providential meeting. Let him whisper in your ear how to approach. Always works for me!

    • Hi Rachel! oh thank you so much! you’re right – that’s God for us! hahaha so true. He will lead the way! glad you stopped by! Hugs and love xox

  41. Caralyn, I too am praying God opens a path to your 84-pound person of peace. She needs you. BTW – Since the 2010 model year, Ram has been a separate part of the same company that focuses solely on trucks. Technically the double-digit dude was driving a Ram.

    • Hi Dan! thank you so much for your prayers – yes, I trust that God will give me the right opportunity to befriend her. Oh dang, a Ram! very fitting! hahaha juuuust kidding 😉 have a great day! Hugs and love xox

  42. Nobody around here sells Cheerios so nobody peed in mine but, had I worn a ProlIfe shirt, you’d think I was Billy Graham’s Big Tent. I am that much Pro Life or just that much. Unlike the chick in the flapping yoga pants, something I’ve never seen before. As usual, you managed to bring the message across, no, obscure it with excellent fun reading. Sharing it on Twitter now.

    • THank you so much, I’m glad you enjoyed the read! hahah too funny! God definitely has a sense of humor! Thanks for passing it along! Hugs and love xox

    • you’re so right about that – little affirmative nudges from God are what keep us going! thanks Lorie for stopping by! have a beautiful afternoon! Hugs and love xox

  43. Yikes!
    Yeah, firstly, sorry about that experience. NOT fun. 😖
    But mostly, thanks for this post. I have been going through similar struggles and discouragement and just weariness, as I’m sure many others are. It’s good to be reminded that even in the weirdest and most uncomfortable times, God still has a purpose for what he has called us to do!

    • Hey friend. Thanks so much. I’m sorry this resonated so personally with you. You’re right – God always has a purpose for us! Hugs and love xox

  44. I once felt pushed by God to write a letter to one of my nieces after a conversation in which she expressed frustration over her deep desires to eat only the healthiest food, but that she felt like most times when she ate anything, or thought about eating certain things she would find herself sick to her stomach. She was running cross country and not wanting to gain weight, but she she wasn’t ovulating either. The letter I wrote told her I was worried about a possible eating disorder and I encouraged her to talk to her mom and doctor about it. She was very angry and offended at me sticking my nose in at the time, but she told me later that it was a turning point for her to actually get help for the real problems, including her disordered eating, in her life.

    Thank you for all you are doing to help others in the world. Big differences are made one person at a time. 💚

    • Hi Heather, thank you for sharing that. Gosh, I’m so glad you had the courage to love her even when it’s hard. It sounds like you were really instrumental in saving her life!! Kudos to you, my friend! Thanks for the wonderful encouragement. Hugs and love xox

  45. Well,…what a gesture to begin your day! And as you normally do, you let it roll off of you so fast that you were extremely prepared through your spiritual perception to lift another struggling female in prayer and thoughtful empathy. 2020 has given us the double-bird for sure at times. And then God signs with “I love you!” and our faith flows with the hope we find only in HIM when we choose~just like you do daily precious Caralyn! You’re a blessing! You are unique, authentic, bold, graceful, forgiving, and so many other things. I know you’re not seeking praise, but the reality is I praise God-~and when I do I praise him for putting people in my life such as you. Love and hugs from Missouri. 💚🙏🏻🤗

    • Hi KL! Haha you’re right – that’s one eye opener you won’t find in a cuppa joe! Thank you for the wonderful encouragement. You’re so right – God is always whispering and gesturing to us His love for us! I am so touched by your generous and kind words, thank you. So grateful for your friendship! Have a beautiful evening! Hugs and love xox

  46. Caralyn,
    I’m so sorry this happened to you. I was shocked and surprised to here this happened when you were just running and minding your own business. I’m so glad you are safe. You have such a good perspective honestly about everything! God is good and He does listen to us. I feel you- sometimes I feel like what’s the point. But in the end it’ll all be worth it. Gosh, I wish I had a friend like you in real life. You just continue to blow me away with your wisdom, humility and kindness. Love you girl. Your posts bring me joy and challenge my perspective. Keep on writing, you are so talented.
    Xoxo, Laura

    1.List two of your unique personal
    qualities, such as enthusiasm
    and creativity.
    2.List one or two ways you enjoy
    expressing those qualities when
    interacting with others, such as to support
    and to inspire.
    3.Assume the world is perfect right now.
    What does this world
    look like? How is everyone interacting with
    everyone else? What does it feel like?

  48. Hi Caralyn, great post! You are very gracious to people; that is a good model for us all to follow as it is sometimes too easy to get caught up in a moment and respond out of hurt. Stay safe and well! And, watch out for the birds 😉

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